Returning to UK

[rammygirl]

It often amazes me how people perceive the climate in Aus.  Like it is sunny and warm/hot all year.

People were surprised when I said some of my plants had succumbed to the frost last winter.  In the Adelaide hills we get 4 seasons, and although I moan when it is cold I realise I prefer it this way.

We now live in an area not too different to where we lived in the UK really (but much less damp!).  Hilly small touristy town half an hour to the city, 40 mins to airport and favourite beach, although sea is still a wee bit chilly! Maybe that is why I feel at home I don’t really feel at home on the flat plains or in the city now.

 

Edited November 14, 2019 by rammygirl

[Vickie78]

8 hours ago, Quoll said:

I love the winter too - there's rarely a day that you cant get out and walk, it's just a matter of appropriate clothing! I love Christmas here - the Christmas markets, the misty evenings and carol singers, - just great!!!  I'm always surprised at how quickly the days get lighter after the shortest day - and when they do get longer it's such a lovely feeling.

Gah stop you're making me want to be there right now! I cannot wait for next Christmas...

[MARYROSE02]

I went back to England (the New Forest) for twelve years, after eighteen in Sydney. It was just circumstances, losing my job, my parents still alive, going back to see them, then getting a job (with Royal Mail) and "just" staying. Then after my parents passed away I stayed a bit longer before deciding to come back to Sydney where I've been for eleven years now. Again, just circumstances, no close relatives in England and two brothers in Sydney. If they were still in England I probably would have stayed there.

I lived in villages in England and I sometimes miss going for bike rides or walks in the countryside. I'm too scared to ride a bike in Sydney but I can swim all year round here as opposed to about four months in England and going to the beach makes up for no easy access to the countryside.

The really hot days can be unpleasant, especially the further west you go. Parramatta where I work makes Surry Hills seem cold, and Penrith where I used to work makes Parramatta seem cold but I still prefer up to nine months of warm weather to those much vaunted four seasons in England and I can get away with wearing shorts all year round at least during the day.

If your circumstances make a move back possible then why not do it? My experience was that going back to "live" is very different to a holiday, especially in the northern summer, and each time I moved is like emigrating.

[deryans]

Love it back in Europe, despite the brexit debacle, having lived in both North Africa,  western Europe, northern Europe (Norway),  Oz (15 years),  I actually prefer the cold, I can always put layers on or take them off,  I can't when it's too hot , there is no respite at 50 deg, and everyone puts their air con on,  you just have to get used to it,  I'd prefer -50 to  +50

Edited November 15, 2019 by deryans

[Marisawright]

9 hours ago, deryans said:

Love it back in Europe, despite the brexit debacle, having lived in both North Africa,  western Europe, northern Europe (Norway),  Oz (15 years),  I actually prefer the cold, I can always put layers on or take them off,  I can't when it's too hot , there is no respite at 50 deg, and everyone puts their air con on,  you just have to get used to it,  I'd prefer -50 to  +50

That's why we live in Melbourne.  

[bunbury61]

On 09/11/2019 at 22:07, KatyNick said:

Hi ... I know that emigrating to Oz is successful for a lot of people, but got those who it doesn’t work out for ... do you regret returning to the UK? 

My post is probably different from anyone elses .

Truth is , I could live in either place - 6 months a year in each would do me .

Australia was very good to us , I have no issues there , whatsoever .

I  have another 2 siblings in australia - at one time we were all there - with 6 children between us .

Mom and dad were in england , and didnt see any of us , as we were 12 ,000 miles away .

We came back on holiday in 94 , and I could see what was coming .

Our 4  parents were getting older with no support network - it just didnt sit right with me , and still doesn't. 

We came back , and have got landed with the full weight of responsibility .

3 of our parents have now died

My mom is alive and in her 90s

 my wife and daughters were at my wifes sisters bedside in may , right at the end , when she died  with stage 4 cancer , this year ,aged 56 .

My wife cared for her every night for 4 months , as she didnt want to leave her  home - 

So we have been through the mill - hammered emotionally and financially .

But do I have any regrets - no I dont - as I said on one of Tony mans posts 

It's funny,  as the youngest sibling , you are sort of overlooked - but who would have thought I would end up the strongest , physically and emotionally .

The saddest part of all - I have no time for my siblings now - we used to be close - but that's a door shut , that will never be reopened 

On the upside , as I have mentioned many times ,the u.k has given my kids a fantastic education in solihull .

We have been all over the world from the u.k ,- europe especially - and it's been bloody fantastic .

You cannot buy the memories we have - that alone has made it worth it .

We have lived our lives at the front end - spent the money and travelled whilst we were all fit and able .

I didnt want to be shuffling   around paris , Vienna or Budapest when I can hardly get about .

So that's all in the bank now .

Who knows what happens after mom dies ?

But I look in the mirror every morning , and I can live with myself - I know my dad is up there , proud of me , and that's good enough .

 

 

[bunbury61]

On 16/11/2019 at 09:04, bunbury61 said:

My post is probably different from anyone elses .

Truth is , I could live in either place - 6 months a year in each would do me .

Australia was very good to us , I have no issues there , whatsoever .

I  have another 2 siblings in australia - at one time we were all there - with 6 children between us .

Mom and dad were in england , and didnt see any of us , as we were 12 ,000 miles away .

We came back on holiday in 94 , and I could see what was coming .

Our 4  parents were getting older with no support network - it just didnt sit right with me , and still doesn't. 

We came back , and have got landed with the full weight of responsibility .

3 of our parents have now died

My mom is alive and in her 90s

 my wife and daughters were at my wifes sisters bedside in may , right at the end , when she died  with stage 4 cancer , this year ,aged 56 .

My wife cared for her every night for 4 months , as she didnt want to leave her  home - 

So we have been through the mill - hammered emotionally and financially .

But do I have any regrets - no I dont - as I said on one of Tony mans posts 

It's funny,  as the youngest sibling , you are sort of overlooked - but who would have thought I would end up the strongest , physically and emotionally .

The saddest part of all - I have no time for my siblings now - we used to be close - but that's a door shut , that will never be reopened 

On the upside , as I have mentioned many times ,the u.k has given my kids a fantastic education in solihull .

We have been all over the world from the u.k ,- europe especially - and it's been bloody fantastic .

You cannot buy the memories we have - that alone has made it worth it .

We have lived our lives at the front end - spent the money and travelled whilst we were all fit and able .

I didnt want to be shuffling   around paris , Vienna or Budapest when I can hardly get about .

So that's all in the bank now .

Who knows what happens after mom dies ?

But I look in the mirror every morning , and I can live with myself - I know my dad is up there , proud of me , and that's good enough .

 

 

It's funny I was sat in company - 3 of us blokes having a beer after the crowd thinned out .

And one of the lads I was with ,is all for leaving - upping sticks with his family and moving to spain or u.s or oz - but he is very close to his mom and dad 

As he was going on - I wanted to say ," mate you havent got a clue what is required " ," you cant pop around to mom and dads for a cup of tea when you are 12,000 miles away " - but I didnt say anything .

Even if you are single minded and bloody selfish - if you are close to your family ,you will have a battle on your hands , making a go of it - and all respect to those that have

[Quoll]

We are on the way back now. Dad has enough marbles and has made the decision to be in a care home, knowing that means we have to sell his home and return to Australia. I hope I will cope! He seems quite sanguine about it and says that he is better off in a care hotel (as it’s called) - he’s right, there is more going on for him and people who care as a profession. It’s going to be a bugger but we don’t have too many choices and we’ve given them our 60s, I don’t think we can give him our 70s too. Some days I feel like a real b!tch but that’s life! I’m going to miss the son and grandson too, just like I’ve missed the son and granddaughters this past 8 years! 

[Tulip1]

On 16/11/2019 at 09:04, bunbury61 said:

My post is probably different from anyone elses .

Truth is , I could live in either place - 6 months a year in each would do me .

Australia was very good to us , I have no issues there , whatsoever .

I  have another 2 siblings in australia - at one time we were all there - with 6 children between us .

Mom and dad were in england , and didnt see any of us , as we were 12 ,000 miles away .

We came back on holiday in 94 , and I could see what was coming .

Our 4  parents were getting older with no support network - it just didnt sit right with me , and still doesn't. 

We came back , and have got landed with the full weight of responsibility .

3 of our parents have now died

My mom is alive and in her 90s

 my wife and daughters were at my wifes sisters bedside in may , right at the end , when she died  with stage 4 cancer , this year ,aged 56 .

My wife cared for her every night for 4 months , as she didnt want to leave her  home - 

So we have been through the mill - hammered emotionally and financially .

But do I have any regrets - no I dont - as I said on one of Tony mans posts 

It's funny,  as the youngest sibling , you are sort of overlooked - but who would have thought I would end up the strongest , physically and emotionally .

The saddest part of all - I have no time for my siblings now - we used to be close - but that's a door shut , that will never be reopened 

On the upside , as I have mentioned many times ,the u.k has given my kids a fantastic education in solihull .

We have been all over the world from the u.k ,- europe especially - and it's been bloody fantastic .

You cannot buy the memories we have - that alone has made it worth it .

We have lived our lives at the front end - spent the money and travelled whilst we were all fit and able .

I didnt want to be shuffling   around paris , Vienna or Budapest when I can hardly get about .

So that's all in the bank now .

Who knows what happens after mom dies ?

But I look in the mirror every morning , and I can live with myself - I know my dad is up there , proud of me , and that's good enough .

 

 

Your family past and present are lucky to have you. You sound a very descent and lovely man. 

[ramot]

2 hours ago, Quoll said:

We are on the way back now. Dad has enough marbles and has made the decision to be in a care home, knowing that means we have to sell his home and return to Australia. I hope I will cope! He seems quite sanguine about it and says that he is better off in a care hotel (as it’s called) - he’s right, there is more going on for him and people who care as a profession. It’s going to be a bugger but we don’t have too many choices and we’ve given them our 60s, I don’t think we can give him our 70s too. Some days I feel like a real b!tch but that’s life! I’m going to miss the son and grandson too, just like I’ve missed the son and granddaughters this past 8 years! 

Quoll as an outsider it’s so easy to say you have know you have been a fabulous support for your parents and you are doing the right thing, but that doesn’t help with the emotional side that you have to come to terms with. Wish you all the best for your return to Australia. xM

[simmo]

On 09/11/2019 at 22:07, KatyNick said:

Hi ... I know that emigrating to Oz is successful for a lot of people, but got those who it doesn’t work out for ... do you regret returning to the UK? 

No.not ever.  Australia doesn't suit everyone (it didn't me).  It's good to see loads on here love thier lives in aus though.

I was just reading through the mbtuk posts and was reminded when I sold my car. The deal didn't go through until the last minute, I actually did the exchange in Brisbane airport carpark before getting on the plane.

 

[Vickie78]

2 hours ago, simmo said:

No.not ever.  Australia doesn't suit everyone (it didn't me).  It's good to see loads on here love thier lives in aus though.

I was just reading through the mbtuk posts and was reminded when I sold my car. The deal didn't go through until the last minute, I actually did the exchange in Brisbane airport carpark before getting on the plane.

 

Wow, that would have been stress city for me. LOL

[Bundijan]

I am a 69 year old widow, have lived in Australia for 20 years.  Born in Uk, remarried to an English man and decided to begin our new life here in Queensland.

Have enjoyed life here and made several friends, but I always felt I did not belong ,to me England was always home. 
Now am alone,  no family here,  a married daughter living in New Zealand and a sister still living in England.  
I long to return home, but worry if I will be able to find a house to rent, and how much pension I will be entitled to . Also will I have to pay council tax and how much.

i have  been doing my sums and by selling everything I own , including my car I will have enough to pay my air fare back to Uk, plus the cost of  bringing my small dog.

i should have about 5000 pounds when i arrive. My sister with her husband live on a boat in Falmouth Cornwall so will have no room for me,  but hopefully I will find somewhere to live , England Wales or Scotland!  
I would be grateful for any advise. 

 

 

[AliQ]

5 hours ago, Bundijan said:

I am a 69 year old widow, have lived in Australia for 20 years.  Born in Uk, remarried to an English man and decided to begin our new life here in Queensland.

Have enjoyed life here and made several friends, but I always felt I did not belong ,to me England was always home. 
Now am alone,  no family here,  a married daughter living in New Zealand and a sister still living in England.  
I long to return home, but worry if I will be able to find a house to rent, and how much pension I will be entitled to . Also will I have to pay council tax and how much.

i have  been doing my sums and by selling everything I own , including my car I will have enough to pay my air fare back to Uk, plus the cost of  bringing my small dog.

i should have about 5000 pounds when i arrive. My sister with her husband live on a boat in Falmouth Cornwall so will have no room for me,  but hopefully I will find somewhere to live , England Wales or Scotland!  
I would be grateful for any advise. 

 

 

HI, sorry to hear you are unsettled. Whilst I can't help with all your queries,  we recently arrived back to the UK this year,  so I can share the following info.

Regarding a rental property, we paid nine months rent upfront. Neither of us are working (retired) and it's quite a rigmarole trying to get statements and documents from pension and super accounts to prove our regular income.

Yes, every household pays council tax, and we think it's very expensive compared to rates paid in Australia. Ours are 1,908.00 pounds a year, and we're not in a posh area either !

Regarding a UK pension, that all depends on how much you have paid in over the years, and whether or not you topped it up with some Voluntary National Insurance contributions. You can check your amount yourself online, just google  gov.uk - check state pension - that will take you to the GOV UK site.

I wish you well.

 

 

 

 

[LouDYorkie]

Did you give the National Insurance office your Australian address? I’d have thought you’d already be receiving your U.K. pension at 69 but it may be that they didn’t have details for you. This is the page you need below. You can log in to see your record and update your address or find contact phone numbers depending on whether you call from the U.K. or Australia. They are very helpful, I’ve found.

https://www.gov.uk/check-state-pension

[Marisawright]

11 hours ago, Bundijan said:

I am a 69 year old widow, have lived in Australia for 20 years.  Born in Uk, remarried to an English man and decided to begin our new life here in Queensland.

Have enjoyed life here and made several friends, but I always felt I did not belong ,to me England was always home. 
Now am alone,  no family here,  a married daughter living in New Zealand and a sister still living in England.  
I long to return home, but worry if I will be able to find a house to rent, and how much pension I will be entitled to . Also will I have to pay council tax and how much.

i have  been doing my sums and by selling everything I own , including my car I will have enough to pay my air fare back to Uk, plus the cost of  bringing my small dog.

i should have about 5000 pounds when i arrive. My sister with her husband live on a boat in Falmouth Cornwall so will have no room for me,  but hopefully I will find somewhere to live , England Wales or Scotland!  
I would be grateful for any advise.

If you lived in the UK until you were 49, you are entitled to the British pension now.  You should claim it whether you move back to the UK or not, so that's your first step.  They might even give you some back-pay as you should have started the pension a few years ago, and that would be a nice sum of money to help you get started.

You'll need to find your old National Insurance number.

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/guidance-on-claiming-a-state-pension-if-you-retire-abroad

Apply now on the basis that you're living in Australia.  Then you'll have to wait until you have proof of a permanent address in the UK (e.g. a rental agreement), and then you can present that and you may get an increase.

I suggest you also go to the Centrellink office too, and ask them to explain how moving will affect your Australian government pension (it will probably be reduced).  You could just ring them, but I find you get more accurate and detailed advice face-to-face.

I'm anxious about you arriving in the UK with so little money.   You'll need to book a holiday flat for three to four weeks, while you look for a place to stay.  That's expensive in England, though if you plan to go back in the off-season it will be cheaper.  Then when you find a flat, you'll need to pay six months' rent upfront because you're a new arrival, and then you'll have the cost of buying furniture, crockery, pots, pans, towels, bedlinen, kitchen appliances etc.     Years ago, it was fairly easy to get a furnished flat but when we were back three years ago, I noticed that most flats were unfurnished, so you'll have to start from scratch.    

If you try to sell your household goods, it's likely you'll get next-to-nothing for them, so I suggest looking into a medium Movecube and ship them all.  You may think they're not worth shipping - but consider that you're going to have to buy brand new stuff to replace them, and if you haven't bought pots or crockery for a while, you'll be stunned at the cost.  Of course it takes six to eight weeks for it to reach the UK, but if you can keep enough bits and pieces to "camp" in your current home, you can send it off early so it arrives by the time you've found a flat. 

Edited December 9, 2019 by Marisawright

[LouDYorkie]

If you paid ‘small stamp’ (married women’s NI), the amount of state pension you are eligible to is likely to be further reduced.
I agree with Marissa, the amount of money you are returning with will not go far at all.

[Martinbjulieb]

22 hours ago, Marisawright said:

 

 

I'm anxious about you arriving in the UK with so little money.   You'll need to book a holiday flat for three to four weeks, while you look for a place to stay.  That's expensive in England, though if you plan to go back in the off-season it will be cheaper.  Then when you find a flat, you'll need to pay six months' rent upfront because you're a new arrival, and then you'll have the cost of buying furniture, crockery, pots, pans, towels, bedlinen, kitchen appliances etc.     Years ago, it was fairly easy to get a furnished flat but when we were back three years ago, I noticed that most flats were unfurnished, so you'll have to start from scratch.    

 

We didn’t pay 6 months. Just the standard one month as a bond. I think it is very much dependent on the Landlord, it isn’t set in stone. 

[Marisawright]

1 hour ago, Martinbjulieb said:

We didn’t pay 6 months. Just the standard one month as a bond. I think it is very much dependent on the Landlord, it isn’t set in stone. 

It also depends whether you have a job or not.  If you can show a pay slip or a letter of appointment, they know you'll have a steady income.   We were answering a lady who will be arriving with no income except her pension and in that situation, most landlords will ask for the money upfront to be on the safe side. 

[Tulip1]

1 hour ago, Marisawright said:

It also depends whether you have a job or not.  If you can show a pay slip or a letter of appointment, they know you'll have a steady income.   We were answering a lady who will be arriving with no income except her pension and in that situation, most landlords will ask for the money upfront to be on the safe side. 

I agree and not only that, the landlord will still want to know how the tenant will fund it going forward.  That six months will soon be up 

[Marisawright]

31 minutes ago, Tulip1 said:

I agree and not only that, the landlord will still want to know how the tenant will fund it going forward.  That six months will soon be up 

No, not really.  We found the whole system strange.  We were willing to show them our bank statements showing a healthy bank balance as an indicator of our ability to pay, but they had absolutely no interest in that.  They wanted proof of a regular income.  Failing that, they wanted six months upfront, and they didn't seem to care how you were going to pay for it after that.  

Edited December 10, 2019 by Marisawright

[Paul1Perth]

On 12/11/2019 at 08:21, Toots said:

.............  but it was your choice to live in a dry, stinking hot suburb in a sweat box where you could hardly breathe or get a decent nights sleep.  The other day it was nearly 40C in Perth and 14C where I live.  I choose to live here and I am very happy if I wasn't I would move    .................  probably back to Scotland.  

Good you are happy and appreciating where you live  now though.  

I live in Perth and we are expecting 40 deg for a few days. It's summer and that's what we expected when we came. I like it, live close to a brilliant beach, go down there early in the morning when loads of people do the same, exercise, swim, coffee with friends then go to work.

If we're not at work stay there a bit longer and when we get home put the aircon on. You wouldn't sit in a UK house in December with no heating and complain about the cold would you?

Having said that we didn't have aircon for the first 10 years we were here and still liked it.

You have to choose where you live carefully. When it was 42 degrees in Ellenbrook a few days ago it was 32 in our beachside suburb with a nice cooling sea breeze. 

Bring on summer.

[Toots]

21 minutes ago, Paul1Perth said:

I live in Perth and we are expecting 40 deg for a few days. It's summer and that's what we expected when we came. I like it, live close to a brilliant beach, go down there early in the morning when loads of people do the same, exercise, swim, coffee with friends then go to work.

If we're not at work stay there a bit longer and when we get home put the aircon on. You wouldn't sit in a UK house in December with no heating and complain about the cold would you?

Having said that we didn't have aircon for the first 10 years we were here and still liked it.

You have to choose where you live carefully. When it was 42 degrees in Ellenbrook a few days ago it was 32 in our beachside suburb with a nice cooling sea breeze. 

Bring on summer.

Yes we used to live in the suburb where you live.  Always a wee bit cooler because it's close to the ocean. 

My sister is leaving Edinburgh to come and stay here for a good few weeks.  She was saying the weather there is not nice at all at the moment -  heavy rain and gale force wind.  The Christmas market and Edinburgh Castle have been closed due to severe weather. 

[Paul1Perth]

On 16/11/2019 at 17:04, bunbury61 said:

My post is probably different from anyone elses .

Truth is , I could live in either place - 6 months a year in each would do me .

Australia was very good to us , I have no issues there , whatsoever .

I  have another 2 siblings in australia - at one time we were all there - with 6 children between us .

Mom and dad were in england , and didnt see any of us , as we were 12 ,000 miles away .

We came back on holiday in 94 , and I could see what was coming .

Our 4  parents were getting older with no support network - it just didnt sit right with me , and still doesn't. 

We came back , and have got landed with the full weight of responsibility .

3 of our parents have now died

My mom is alive and in her 90s

 my wife and daughters were at my wifes sisters bedside in may , right at the end , when she died  with stage 4 cancer , this year ,aged 56 .

My wife cared for her every night for 4 months , as she didnt want to leave her  home - 

So we have been through the mill - hammered emotionally and financially .

But do I have any regrets - no I dont - as I said on one of Tony mans posts 

It's funny,  as the youngest sibling , you are sort of overlooked - but who would have thought I would end up the strongest , physically and emotionally .

The saddest part of all - I have no time for my siblings now - we used to be close - but that's a door shut , that will never be reopened 

On the upside , as I have mentioned many times ,the u.k has given my kids a fantastic education in solihull .

We have been all over the world from the u.k ,- europe especially - and it's been bloody fantastic .

You cannot buy the memories we have - that alone has made it worth it .

We have lived our lives at the front end - spent the money and travelled whilst we were all fit and able .

I didnt want to be shuffling   around paris , Vienna or Budapest when I can hardly get about .

So that's all in the bank now .

Who knows what happens after mom dies ?

But I look in the mirror every morning , and I can live with myself - I know my dad is up there , proud of me , and that's good enough .

 

 

It is sad that you fell out with your siblings over it bunbury. Do you resent them staying and feeling they didn't pull their weight? Not everyone can deal with it or feels the need to do it. I am really lucky in that as my parents got older my sis just dealt with everything. She got them to move house to be closer to them and my nieces, sorted the old house, got a new place sorted. When my Dad died she was the one who had to go round and see him die, help my Mum, organise the funeral, find a home for Mum to move to. 

My nieces were good too, used to visit Mum almost daily in the home.

I went back for both funerals but everything had been sorted when I got there. Dad died quickly and I didn't get to see him, Mum was still alive when I got back and me and Sis spent the last night with her in the room.

Not once have any of them made me feel guilty or said anything about being over here. Lucky for me.

They have all enjoyed coming for a holiday and my Sis did try to emigrate but didn't qualify. My Sis and nieces all agree it's the best thing we could have done.

Try and forgive your siblings and get them close again. Family is important and disagreements about older relativeshappen a lot. My Dad didn't speak to his Sister for years when his Mum died and he thought his sis got a lot more inheritance. She only lived in Robin Hoods Bay, close to his Sister, but my Dad didn't see his Mum for years. You don't have to be on the other side of the world to not be involved. Some people feel guilty and they have to do something, some don't, they just don't see a problem with not being emotionally involved.

No sense in falling out about it though.

[Marisawright]

19 hours ago, Paul1Perth said:

 I am really lucky in that as my parents got older my sis just dealt with everything. She got them to move house to be closer to them and my nieces, sorted the old house, got a new place sorted. When my Dad died she was the one who had to go round and see him die, help my Mum, organise the funeral, find a home for Mum to move to. 

 

....My Dad didn't speak to his Sister for years when his Mum died and he thought his sis got a lot more inheritance.

I had a similar experience.  I have three sisters. When my Dad got infirm, one of my sisters stepped up and looked after everything. It wasn't my oldest sister who lived close by - it was my other sister who lived several hours away.   In his last year or so, he needed constant care, and she left her family and moved in with him full-time (which wouldn't have been easy, he was a cantankerous old bugger even when he was well!).   I was so grateful to her and paid for her daughter to come out on a WHV (she ended up living with me for nearly the whole year, so much for adventurous youth!).  

When my Dad died, the will split his estate equally between us.  There was a huge fight.  My oldest sister and my youngest sister felt that was unfair, because Dad had been making monthly payments to the sister who'd been caring for him - so they said, "she's already got her money out of him".    I had always felt it was fair:  knowing she was looking after Dad was priceless for me, and besides, I knew she'd spent most of that money on petrol and buying little things for Dad's old house to make things more comfortable for him. 

I've patched things up with my younger sister but I've never spoken to my oldest sister since.