Missingtheseasons Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 My husband and I have been in Oz for over 12 years and are considering the move back to the UK. I personally, miss family and friends, the country pubs, the history, the changing seasons (we live in Cairns where there are two seasons; hot and wet and hot and not so wet), the gentleness of the wildlife, Marks and Sparks, Tesco (yes really). My husband has never really settled and misses Scotland. Our concern is the kids who are 12 and 10 years old. They have been on holiday to the UK and absolutely loved it. I know if we told them we're thinking about going back, they'd be thrilled. However, they only have what they experienced during four weeks of holiday and more than anything (and they were in the UK in January/February) Im worried they will hate the weather and the cold. OK, there's plenty of rain where we live but its warm rain and we live five minutes from the beach. Has anyone in a similar situation made a successful and happy move back? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JockinTas Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 My husband and I have been in Oz for over 12 years and are considering the move back to the UK. I personally, miss family and friends, the country pubs, the history, the changing seasons (we live in Cairns where there are two seasons; hot and wet and hot and not so wet), the gentleness of the wildlife, Marks and Sparks, Tesco (yes really). My husband has never really settled and misses Scotland. Our concern is the kids who are 12 and 10 years old. They have been on holiday to the UK and absolutely loved it. I know if we told them we're thinking about going back, they'd be thrilled. However, they only have what they experienced during four weeks of holiday and more than anything (and they were in the UK in January/February) Im worried they will hate the weather and the cold. OK, there's plenty of rain where we live but its warm rain and we live five minutes from the beach. Has anyone in a similar situation made a successful and happy move back? I think there are a few people on this forum who have left to go back to the UK for much same reasons as you give and they settled back there very happily. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sammy1 Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 I think there are a few people on this forum who have left to go back to the UK for much same reasons as you give and they settled back there very happily. A number of my former students and friends have moved back successfully. Yes, one or two have come back as they could not settle, but the majority are happy to be back 'home'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gbye grey sky Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 I firmly believe that kids are best off when both their parents are happy. I don't think that kids are as bothered about climate and the weather as many of us adults. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 Plenty! I was just reading a post today from an old member whose son had had a really hard time in school in Sydney and who had been back for about 4 years now - her son has blossomed and completed GCSES when his Aussie school had written him off because of a disability. The kids usually couldn't care less, for them, "home" is mum and dad not the place they live it in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VERYSTORMY Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 Agree with the above, kids will be happy where parents are. I grew up in the north east, so similar weather and some of my best memories as a child are from winter. We we have moved back without children and are very happy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 You'll only know if your kids have any worries about a move back if you ask them - gives you an opportunity to address any anxieties in a positive way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambethlad Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 I came here as a child and would have been devastated if my parents had decided to return to the UK. Going from Cairns to Scotland is very extreme and would take a lot of adjustment for a couple of Aussie kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 (edited) I don't have kids but I've been on these forums for a while and I've seen several families return to the UK very happily. The fact that your kids are keen is a good thing and mens they'll start their new life with a positive attitude, which is a great thing - they're not saying they'll be devastated, like Lambethlad! And personally, I don't think you have a choice. The question to ask yourself is - if you don't move now, what's the alternative? Do you really think you can stay in Australia for the rest of your lives, feeling this way? How do you feel, thinking that you're going to die in Australia? Most people who feel as you do, find that those feelings get stronger with age, not less. Don't think, I can stick it out for now and I'll retire back to Scotland - as we discovered, that's not easy because there are pension and tax penalties, and you'l be much worse off financially if you try to retire back "home" after a lifetime in Australia. You need to get back and start building your right to UK benefits and pensions again. Besides, by the time you retire, your children will be grown up and married and thoroughly settled in Austraila, and then you'll be torn between missing your homeland or missing your grandkids. If you go now, your children can slot easily into schools. Leave it any longer and you'll risk disrupting your older child's preparation for exams. Also bear in mind that you need to establish residency before they can go to university as local students - leave it too late and they'll have to pay full international fees to go to a British university, even though they are citizens. I'd go where you are happiest - a happy family creates happy children wherever you are. Edited August 30, 2016 by Marisawright Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newjez Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 (edited) My husband and I have been in Oz for over 12 years and are considering the move back to the UK. I personally, miss family and friends, the country pubs, the history, the changing seasons (we live in Cairns where there are two seasons; hot and wet and hot and not so wet), the gentleness of the wildlife, Marks and Sparks, Tesco (yes really). My husband has never really settled and misses Scotland. Our concern is the kids who are 12 and 10 years old. They have been on holiday to the UK and absolutely loved it. I know if we told them we're thinking about going back, they'd be thrilled. However, they only have what they experienced during four weeks of holiday and more than anything (and they were in the UK in January/February) Im worried they will hate the weather and the cold. OK, there's plenty of rain where we live but its warm rain and we live five minutes from the beach. Has anyone in a similar situation made a successful and happy move back? I was ten when my parents dragged me from Sydney to Barnett. I loved sydney. We lived in Hornsby and I had a thousand acres of bushland at my feet, with a tributary to the hawksbury running right through it. Life was pretty damn good. I didn't hate Barnett. Bit of a shock to the system. But I liked the nearby woods. It was a novelty having extended family. I suddenly had what all my other friends had had. We seemed to have less money than most, and there was a bit of snobbery and bullying, but I was a tough Aussie kid and I fell in with a good group of friends. It wasn't so great when I got dragged back to Australia again, started another school, then had to change that one four months later. I failed to find a best friend, got bullied a fair bit, and lost myself in competitive cycling. Which was okay but very lonely. Changed me. I have less need for people now. I have time for people I like, but I don't make an effort otherwise. I turned out okay, eventually. But I am living on the other side of the world to my parents. Toss a coin. If you are lucky it may turn out okay. The weather never really came into it. Edited August 31, 2016 by newjez Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I was ten when my parents dragged me from Sydney to Barnett. I loved sydney. We lived in Hornsby and I had a thousand acres of bushland at my feet, with a tributary to the hawksbury running right through it. Life was pretty damn good. I didn't hate Barnett. Bit of a shock to the system. But I liked the nearby woods. It was a novelty having extended family. I suddenly had what all my other friends had had. We seemed to have less money than most, and there was a bit of snobbery and bullying, but I was a tough Aussie kid and I fell in with a good group of friends. It wasn't so great when I got dragged back to Australia again. Ah but the point is, I think, that it was the ping-ponging that scarred you, not the initial move back to the UK. So the lesson is, if they're going back to the UK, they need to make up their mind that they're going to make a go of it and stay for good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wozzie2202 Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I think that kids tend to adapt very well, particularly if they have moved around before. Having lived in a military community for many years, children get used to moving on every few years and although at the time they may whinge and moan and worry, they settle incredibly quickly most of the time. I moved a lot as a child too and as an adult it has given me that thirst for adventure and makes you realise how small the world really is. I would much rather my kids were exposed to different environments/ cultures/ experiences at a young age than growing up in one place. Doesn't apply to everyone I guess but I love to reflect back on the adventures I had in my childhood as I moved countries and hope my children do the same. Life is a gift and we should do with it what makes us happy as this is no dress rehearsal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newjez Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 I think that kids tend to adapt very well, particularly if they have moved around before. Having lived in a military community for many years, children get used to moving on every few years and although at the time they may whinge and moan and worry, they settle incredibly quickly most of the time. I moved a lot as a child too and as an adult it has given me that thirst for adventure and makes you realise how small the world really is. I would much rather my kids were exposed to different environments/ cultures/ experiences at a young age than growing up in one place. Doesn't apply to everyone I guess but I love to reflect back on the adventures I had in my childhood as I moved countries and hope my children do the same. Life is a gift and we should do with it what makes us happy as this is no dress rehearsal. I think military kids are very different from other kids and you hit the nail on the head with the word community. Whenever we moved, and we moved alot, even in Sydney, and we started out in Melbourne, I made friends easily and adapted well. It's when I hit a school where I failed to make friends that I failed. My parents were too busy worrying about all the money they had lost flying around the world to notice. Plus kids are pretty good at hiding things. After all, what could I do? Ask them to fly back again? I always say that if you are going to do this, be sure you are doing the right thing, and invest time in making sure your kids adjust, and that it is actually working. It can work. It worked several times for me. It was just very painful when it didn't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 At 12 and 10 I would think they would be ok- but I wouldn't wait too long because 13 and 15 would be a whole new ball game! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bristolman Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 We moved back with 2 Aussie born and bred kids, both 11 years old and they love it here and have no interest in going back to Australia. They aren't the slightest bit worried about the weather but they need er liked the heat in Queensland anyway. They have adapted incredibly well and have a great circle of close friends. I wouldn't worry to be honest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunbury61 Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 My husband and I have been in Oz for over 12 years and are considering the move back to the UK. I personally, miss family and friends, the country pubs, the history, the changing seasons (we live in Cairns where there are two seasons; hot and wet and hot and not so wet), the gentleness of the wildlife, Marks and Sparks, Tesco (yes really). My husband has never really settled and misses Scotland. Our concern is the kids who are 12 and 10 years old. They have been on holiday to the UK and absolutely loved it. I know if we told them we're thinking about going back, they'd be thrilled. However, they only have what they experienced during four weeks of holiday and more than anything (and they were in the UK in January/February) Im worried they will hate the weather and the cold. OK, there's plenty of rain where we live but its warm rain and we live five minutes from the beach. Has anyone in a similar situation made a successful and happy move back? No it isn't easy ...end of ...but if you stick together as a family anything is possible . The weather may be changeable at best ...cold in Scotland in the winter ...BUT the big trade off is the rellies and access to fantastic travel.. I understand why you miss the things you miss ...because in a lot of ways here in the u.k ...if its shopping of all description ,t.v choice and travel we are bloody spoilt . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunbury61 Posted August 31, 2016 Share Posted August 31, 2016 No it isn't easy ...end of ...but if you stick together as a family anything is possible .The weather may be changeable at best ...cold in Scotland in the winter ...BUT the big trade off is the rellies and access to fantastic travel.. I understand why you miss the things you miss ...because in a lot of ways here in the u.k ...if its shopping of all description ,t.v choice and travel we are bloody spoilt . To add to my post ,if you do come back to Glasgow ,it wont be all wine and roses ...but this time you have to stick it ...thats it game over . You can end up in limbo . Will you be totally happy in Scotland ...I very much doubt it . But do you want to grow old and die in cairns ? ...thought not If Scotland is home .. Then it will always be home .. And there is nothing you can do about it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bristolman Posted September 4, 2016 Share Posted September 4, 2016 No it isn't easy ...end of ...but if you stick together as a family anything is possible .The weather may be changeable at best ...cold in Scotland in the winter ...BUT the big trade off is the rellies and access to fantastic travel.. I understand why you miss the things you miss ...because in a lot of ways here in the u.k ...if its shopping of all description ,t.v choice and travel we are bloody spoilt . I can't agree really, we found it incredibly easy, our kids took to this country like ducks to water and everything fell into place painlessly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gbye grey sky Posted September 4, 2016 Share Posted September 4, 2016 I can't agree really, we found it incredibly easy, our kids took to this country like ducks to water and everything fell into place painlessly. I feel you prove my point that if the parents are happy then the kids thrive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gummygirl Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 My husband and I have been in Oz for over 12 years and are considering the move back to the UK. I personally, miss family and friends, the country pubs, the history, the changing seasons (we live in Cairns where there are two seasons; hot and wet and hot and not so wet), the gentleness of the wildlife, Marks and Sparks, Tesco (yes really). My husband has never really settled and misses Scotland. Our concern is the kids who are 12 and 10 years old. They have been on holiday to the UK and absolutely loved it. I know if we told them we're thinking about going back, they'd be thrilled. However, they only have what they experienced during four weeks of holiday and more than anything (and they were in the UK in January/February) Im worried they will hate the weather and the cold. OK, there's plenty of rain where we live but its warm rain and we live five minutes from the beach. Has anyone in a similar situation made a successful and happy move back? We landed in the UK eight weeks ago (after almost twenty years in Oz) and my nine year old has been having a great time. It helped to arrive in the summer as we've had shockingly good weather since we got here, enabling lots of fun outings. So much to do--we got National Trust membership and that's been a great starting point. Everyone warns it will turn so the memory of the sunshine will hopefully see us through. That said, I lived on the East Coast of the US for many years and the winters in England are nothing compared to the blizzards I've seen. Although my daughter is looking forward to seeing snow for the first time. It's been so sunny we haven't let up on sun cream. Feels like we've had enough radiation in Oz to last a lifetime. It's rained a few times but more gentle than the drenching monsoon downpours we used to get. Her grandparents are half an hour away and have been enjoying a few days out with her. They were initially stuck in their routines, so we had to give them a gentle hint by saying, 'you might want to spend some time with yr granddaughter before school starts', which reminded them of what they said they'd been missing this whole time, and they've picked things up beautifully. As have her uncle and cousin. We moved into a rental and our neighbours have been fabulous. Both have kids a few years younger and they keep inviting her over to play. We had nice neighbours in Sydney but the ones here have been so good at inviting us to lunch, watching a movie with kids etc. I was warned that people here wouldn't be that friendly but we've even been invited to tea by a couple of people we've met on outings, something we never experienced in Oz. I've been quick to mention that we've just relocated and it feels like some people have gone out of their way to welcome us. We proactively spoke to the school about ensuring she had a smooth transition and a couple of families invited us over for play dates so she feels she knows a few girls from the school and is looking forward to seeing them again. Time will tell how she feels once school starts but so far so good. We thought about waiting till she finished primary school, but now we're glad we moved when we did. I would definitely recommend moving before the teenage years hit. I think they tend to be more set in their social circles by then. And probably worse if they get a boy/girlfriend. I can only imagine the tantrums if they find out they have to leave their new love!...I'm sure there are people here who moved as teenagers and were fine, but I think the general consensus is the sooner the better. And of course individual circumstances vary, so one just has to hope new friendships will be formed to replace the ones left behind, but I think this is more often the case than not. Oh and I'm impressed by the online shopping service here. The delivery passes, the one hour time slots. They're really popular around here and I can see why. Takes a few visits to the supermarket to get to know what you want but after that you're all set. We use Sainsbury's but they're all pretty good. I do miss Aldi, although there is one twenty minutes away so I should probably make the trip to see what they have. Best of luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gummygirl Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 PS a friend in Oz asked me if we were moving back for the weather and I said 'Yes--if you mean Provence, Tuscany and Santorini' We have previously said to ourselves that even if the family/friends expectations didn't come through, the travel/cultural opportunities around here would be a very good consolation prize. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perthbum Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 Scotland is a different country when it comes to the weather but in the place I live in the weather is ideal, its been a good summer and the winters have bwwn very mild with some very frosty mornings now and again. I can see the problem with moving back to scotland as almost always when the south is enjoying good weather scotland is not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perthbum Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 PS a friend in Oz asked me if we were moving back for the weather and I said 'Yes--if you mean Provence, Tuscany and Santorini' We have previously said to ourselves that even if the family/friends expectations didn't come through, the travel/cultural opportunities around here would be a very good consolation prize. Look at the forecast for the next month from the BBC, same as always...the south good....the north not so good. 15°C Edinburgh United Kingdom Warnings Monthly Outlook Monday 29 August Published at 10:00 Monthly Outlook Summary Southwesterly winds to bring September warmth The month of September can bring either late summer weather or an early taste of autumn rain and gales. A brief return to very warm weather is expected in the coming week, while over the month as a whole southwesterly winds are expected to prevail. These should give a prevalence of rather warm and often dry weather in southeastern parts, while the northwest sees spells of windier weather with more rainfall. Monday 5 September—Sunday 11 September Summer warmth to return - for a while The first Monday in September will see mostly cloudy skies across the country, although eastern counties will be mostly dry and may start bright. Occasional rain further west will turn light and patchy, with a lot of hill fog developing in the west. On Tuesday, much of Scotland will have sunny spells but other areas will start cloudy and misty. It will brighten up in places, and it will feel warm and humid where this happens. The warming trend continues on Wednesday and Thursday, with increasing amounts of sunshine. Temperatures may reach 28 Celsius in the east. Scotland and Northern Ireland retain the risk of some showers. Late in the week, stronger winds from the Atlantic will bring a drop in temperatures and also bands of rain or showers which will chiefly affect the northwest. Monday 12 September—Sunday 18 September Often dry and warm in the southeast Heading towards mid-month, the week's weather pattern is expected to feature high pressure close to southeast England or over the near continent. This will bring a lot of fine weather to much of England and Wales, with daytime temperatures on the warm side. Scotland and Northern Ireland will be under a run of sometimes strong south-westerly winds from the Atlantic: these northwestern parts will also have some fine periods but also some showers and perhaps one or two longer outbreaks of rain. These will weaken as they head south-eastwards into England and Wales, bringing only brief interruptions to the dry weather. Monday 19 September—Sunday 2 October Settled weather expected to dominate For late September, current indications are for northwestern parts to continue rather unsettled for a while, with occasional bands of wet and windy weather. Meanwhile, all southern and eastern areas will have lengthy periods of dry weather, with above average temperatures, and only short periods of cloud and the threat of rain. Late in the month, some more settled spells may also affect northern parts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JockinTas Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 The weather in the UK isn't bad at all. I certainly didn't move to Australia for the weather - that's laughable. Because of the longer school holidays here at Christmas, I used to go back to Scotland with my two lads at that time of year. The weather never kept them indoors and they were often found playing football with the boys from the village in all sorts of weather. The cold certainly didn't stop them from going outside for a good part of the day exploring the local woods and fields. One of them is now working in Ireland and he never comments on the weather so I'm supposing it's not bad at all - he is a vet and works outdoors a lot of the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bristolman Posted September 6, 2016 Share Posted September 6, 2016 We landed in the UK eight weeks ago (after almost twenty years in Oz) and my nine year old has been having a great time. It helped to arrive in the summer as we've had shockingly good weather since we got here, enabling lots of fun outings. So much to do--we got National Trust membership and that's been a great starting point. Everyone warns it will turn so the memory of the sunshine will hopefully see us through. That said, I lived on the East Coast of the US for many years and the winters in England are nothing compared to the blizzards I've seen. Although my daughter is looking forward to seeing snow for the first time. It's been so sunny we haven't let up on sun cream. Feels like we've had enough radiation in Oz to last a lifetime. It's rained a few times but more gentle than the drenching monsoon downpours we used to get. Her grandparents are half an hour away and have been enjoying a few days out with her. They were initially stuck in their routines, so we had to give them a gentle hint by saying, 'you might want to spend some time with yr granddaughter before school starts', which reminded them of what they said they'd been missing this whole time, and they've picked things up beautifully. As have her uncle and cousin. We moved into a rental and our neighbours have been fabulous. Both have kids a few years younger and they keep inviting her over to play. We had nice neighbours in Sydney but the ones here have been so good at inviting us to lunch, watching a movie with kids etc. I was warned that people here wouldn't be that friendly but we've even been invited to tea by a couple of people we've met on outings, something we never experienced in Oz. I've been quick to mention that we've just relocated and it feels like some people have gone out of their way to welcome us. We proactively spoke to the school about ensuring she had a smooth transition and a couple of families invited us over for play dates so she feels she knows a few girls from the school and is looking forward to seeing them again. Time will tell how she feels once school starts but so far so good. We thought about waiting till she finished primary school, but now we're glad we moved when we did. I would definitely recommend moving before the teenage years hit. I think they tend to be more set in their social circles by then. And probably worse if they get a boy/girlfriend. I can only imagine the tantrums if they find out they have to leave their new love!...I'm sure there are people here who moved as teenagers and were fine, but I think the general consensus is the sooner the better. And of course individual circumstances vary, so one just has to hope new friendships will be formed to replace the ones left behind, but I think this is more often the case than not. Oh and I'm impressed by the online shopping service here. The delivery passes, the one hour time slots. They're really popular around here and I can see why. Takes a few visits to the supermarket to get to know what you want but after that you're all set. We use Sainsbury's but they're all pretty good. I do miss Aldi, although there is one twenty minutes away so I should probably make the trip to see what they have. Best of luck. You were warned people wouldn't be that friendly, where does this nonsense come from ? I have read on here a couple of times how everyone is so miserable in the UK but we see no evidence of it. It seems to be people wanting to make themselves feel good about their decision. We have certainly found the exact opposite, people around here are very friendly and welcoming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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