Phil & Vikki Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 (edited) Saturday morning we got the call that we never wanted. my mom told me that my dad had passed away after a heart attach at the age of 68, one week 1 day after his birthday. It is the call that we never wanted and hoped that we would never get while we were here. we hunted around and after we reached a point where we could go out we were unable to book anyflights back until Tuesday. So we will land Wednesday morning, awhole five days after my dad had died. The death was really hard for us all, but that was not the only thing that is eating us up. The fact that we were not there formy mom whenshe needed us most.That with the fact that we are only able to get there 5 days after this whole nasty situation had happened. God knows how my mom must be coping with here only son around her and the onlyfamily she has now. My momand dad were married over 45 years and to be on herown nowwhenshe needs us around is really eating us up. She said thatshe understands, but deep down it must not be easy for her. We would never of thoughtthat he would go like this. We were there Christmas and he was able to spend that time with his grandchildren. When we left he looked as fit as an ox, ready to go another 15 years in the ring with life and win them all. We spoke to him on the phone the morning before he passed away and he sounded great. He even sent us an email and on the bottom it said look forward to talking to you on skype Sunday. That will never come around now. With our and on our heart we thought he had loadsof time left. It just goes to show, ou never know. We wanted to share this story as yes it is nice being out here and a great adventure. However when making the plans to com out and be away from your family, you can sometime overlook that life does not always go to plan and that the people you love may just go quick and not being able to get home when you are needed, can be as hard as the event itself. Edited May 28, 2013 by Phil & Vikki Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akiralx Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Sorry for your loss, and wise words for all potential migrants. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Oh gosh, in tears for you here. Nothing I can say, you are so right life often doesn't turn out as you would think. 68 is really quite young, my parents are in their 80s and it has been a factor in our decision to go home. As a parent yourself you will know that your love for your children is selfless - you want entirely without reservation what is best for them. Your mum and dad will miss you and their grandchildren but it would also bring them great happiness that you could have your amazing adventure. Your dad died knowing how loved he was and your mum will feel supported even though you aren't their physically. Nothing more I can say, will be thinking of you x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest16631 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 ........so sorry to hear of your loss..... ........your mum will love having you back......to help her through this time.. ........it's not always possible to be with those we love when they leave this journey behind.... ........but .you could of easily been on holiday..... .........too far away even in the uk........to of got there to be with him..... .........it's often a little after ,that those left behind........ ..........need company.........when the initial shock is over ............and reality sets in.......then family are invaluable......ime..... ............so my thought are with you and yours....... ............take care.........tink x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsLZB Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 I am so sorry for your loss and this heart breaking situation you are in. Your mum knows you are there for her, and on your way back, so take comfort in that. Safe travels and take good care of yourselves too. Sending hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Pom Queen Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 I am really sorry for your loss :hug: In your post it sounds like you are beating yourself up with guilt, please don't. Your dad would not of wanted that. You will be back with your mum soon. Could you not fly back earlier and let the rest of the family follow if you are worried about the 5 days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinsmom65 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Phil and Vicki, so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annlee Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Hi so sorry, our thoughts are with you and your family . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creese Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So sorry to hear your sad news. The same thing happened to me this time last year, I got the call from my sister early morning. Had to fly back to the UK on my own as we didnt have the money for us all to go. It is so difficult, feel for you x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 I am so sorry for your loss. Our thoughts are with you at this difficult time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ramot Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So sorry to hear your sad news. You are in a no win situation when you move over seas. I had just flown back to the UK for a quick visit with my husband who was only to be there with me for 2 days. So we went to our own house, phoned my Mum for a quick chat and said I would visit in a couple of days after he left. He left 2 days later and she died that night. I beat myself up for years as, had we known the future we would have driven straight up to see her, but no one knew there was anything wrong with her, but I felt so bad as I was actually in the country when she died. I'm sure your Dad knew you loved him, it will be very hard for your mother and she will be so appreciative of your support when you get back. all the best to you and your family at this sad time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VERYSTORMY Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So sorry. Thinking of you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarek Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Saturday morning we got the call that we never wanted. my mom told me that my dad had passed away after a heart attach at the age of 68, one week 1 day after his birthday. It is the call that we never wanted and hoped that we would never get while we were here. we hunted around and after we reached a point where we could go out we were unable to book anyflights back until Tuesday. So we will land Wednesday morning, awhole five days after my dad had died. The death was really hard for us all, but that was not the only thing that is eating us up. The fact that we were not there formy mom whenshe needed us most.That with the fact that we are only able to get there 5 days after this whole nasty situation had happened. God knows how my mom must be coping with here only son around her and the onlyfamily she has now. My momand dad were married over 45 years and to be on herown nowwhenshe needs us around is really eating us up. She said thatshe understands, but deep down it must not be easy for her. We would never of thoughtthat he would go like this. We were there Christmas and he was able to spend that time with his grandchildren. When we left he looked as fit as an ox, ready to go another 15 years in the ring with life and win them all. We spoke to him on the phone the morning before he passed away and he sounded great. He even sent us an email and on the bottom it said look forward to talking to you on skype Sunday. That will never come around now. With our and on our heart we thought he had loadsof time left. It just goes to show, ou never know. We wanted to share this story as yes it is nice being out here and a great adventure. However when making the plans to com out and be away from your family, you can sometime overlook that life does not always go to plan and that the people you love may just go quick and not being able to get home when you are needed, can be as hard as the event itself. I'm sorry for your loss, but I wish if you had posted this a bit earlier, this is for no benefit to me, but I just have friends where they can help, as every airline has reserve seats for such circumstances and emergency cases. Anyways, please let me know if you want better arrangements for your trip back here, but let me know the carrier and the ticket class by PM. Sorry again for your loss and to be honest, I'm afraid of the same, I feel like I've abandoned my family by moving here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaska Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So so sorry for your loss. x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fourcorners Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So sorry to hear of your loss. Having just been through a very similar situation (my OH's Dad passed away 2 weeks ago) we know how you must be feeling. We were lucky to spend a couple of weeks with my FIL after he had his stroke and all was looking good for his return home. He had spent the Saturday visiting his house and visiting my OH's sister and family - they all had a wonderful day. Then on the Sunday he got up to brush his teeth and comb his hair, and 5 minutes later it looked like he'd fallen asleep in his wheelchair. He was 65. We were so thankful we had spent that time with him in April and didn't leave it any longer. I hope you too, once the shock has subsided, can appreciate that you got to spend Christmas together and have some great quality family time. But like you, we fear for the ones left behind and how they will cope. It feels so selfish staying in Australia feeling helpless and unable to support loved ones properly during times like this. It's why we're starting to make preliminary plans to move back. I can't go through this with three more parents (never mind a step-parent in each case...). I hope the picture can become clearer for you and your family too, priorities really do change after these events. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simmo Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Very sorry for your loss, a reminder to us all to treasure the time we have with love ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Julz Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Oh god so sorry to read your devastating news, my heart goes out to you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the bottler Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 I am so sorry to hear about your father ... Take care ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 My sympathies to you and your family - that's the call I was dreading for years but 68 is so young! :hug: To you all and safe trip! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jac2011 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So sorry for your loss, there is nothing that can be said that hasn't already been said... As much as the guilt is eating you up I am sure your dad was proud of you and everything you have achieved, what more could he have wanted in life xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest51810 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 So sorry for your loss x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal2 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 so sorry for your loss, I know we will get a call one day, as you say just dont know when Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whichway1 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 that's so sad. my condolences Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jin77 Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 We are really sorry to hear of your loss .our thoughts are for your family . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest22466 Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 so sorry to hear of your loss. Take Care xxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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