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Assaults, Threats and Family Law


Huntersmummy

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Good evening guys! Long time no posty! ?

well ive officially been in Darwin for 3 years now and bloody hate it. My old posts are between giving it a go and not liking it.....now it’s complete resentment. 

Im stuck in a family law case right now with wanting to return home with the kids but husband says no so I can’t just “go back home then” 

Straw that broke the expat back ? was a month ago I was punched in the head by an aboriginal bloke....not drunk either! Just angry because “””drum roll””” I asked him to stop begging for food off customers. I was just doing my job and security hadn’t started yet. 

Then a few days ago, few kids threatened to stab me in my pregnant belly because I wouldn’t buy them smokes and lollies. 

Being hurt or threatened can happen anywhere....I get that but come on! A non threatening pregnant woman? 

I hate this place. Firstly, immigration should warn you of the Hauge Convention law and secondly, yes I felt sorry for “most, not all” aboriginals when I first arrived but now.....nothing but abuse, being a white c**t, callings my kids names for not giving them $2.....biggest regret was moving here. 

Darwin is one of a kind. A massive turd hole to be precise. 

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1 hour ago, Huntersmummy said:

Good evening guys! Long time no posty! ?

well ive officially been in Darwin for 3 years now and bloody hate it. My old posts are between giving it a go and not liking it.....now it’s complete resentment. 

Im stuck in a family law case right now with wanting to return home with the kids but husband says no so I can’t just “go back home then” 

Straw that broke the expat back ? was a month ago I was punched in the head by an aboriginal bloke....not drunk either! Just angry because “””drum roll””” I asked him to stop begging for food off customers. I was just doing my job and security hadn’t started yet. 

Then a few days ago, few kids threatened to stab me in my pregnant belly because I wouldn’t buy them smokes and lollies. 

Being hurt or threatened can happen anywhere....I get that but come on! A non threatening pregnant woman? 

I hate this place. Firstly, immigration should warn you of the Hauge Convention law and secondly, yes I felt sorry for “most, not all” aboriginals when I first arrived but now.....nothing but abuse, being a white c**t, callings my kids names for not giving them $2.....biggest regret was moving here. 

Darwin is one of a kind. A massive turd hole to be precise. 

Oh dear I am so very sorry that it’s turned out this way for you. I remember your initial move very well (wow, 3 years ago, time flies). You’re right though, every family (and we do try on here!) must be aware of The Hague Convention before they move. It’s trapped many unwary parents who might not want to remain in Australia in particular because if one parent says no, Aus won’t let them go except under very exceptional circumstances and (as you are no doubt discovering) at huge cost.

I really hope you get the resolution you want, especially as you are pregnant. 

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7 hours ago, Huntersmummy said:

Good evening guys! Long time no posty! ?

well ive officially been in Darwin for 3 years now and bloody hate it. My old posts are between giving it a go and not liking it.....now it’s complete resentment. 

Im stuck in a family law case right now with wanting to return home with the kids but husband says no so I can’t just “go back home then” 

Straw that broke the expat back ? was a month ago I was punched in the head by an aboriginal bloke....not drunk either! Just angry because “””drum roll””” I asked him to stop begging for food off customers. I was just doing my job and security hadn’t started yet. 

Then a few days ago, few kids threatened to stab me in my pregnant belly because I wouldn’t buy them smokes and lollies. 

Being hurt or threatened can happen anywhere....I get that but come on! A non threatening pregnant woman? 

I hate this place. Firstly, immigration should warn you of the Hauge Convention law and secondly, yes I felt sorry for “most, not all” aboriginals when I first arrived but now.....nothing but abuse, being a white c**t, callings my kids names for not giving them $2.....biggest regret was moving here. 

Darwin is one of a kind. A massive turd hole to be precise. 

Agree.   Shitty weather, poor infrastructure etc etc.  Did military time there and a 3 day trip for a race meeting and the best part was getting on the plane to leave

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2 hours ago, ali said:

Is moving to another part of Aus an option for you?  

Nope ? part of the visa restrictions is we have to stay in the NT. TBH, after experiencing darwin life and the fact I’m a stubborn butthole, I could be offered a million dollars to move to Adelaide, Melbourne etc and it would be no thanks! I’m officially done! ?

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7 hours ago, Quoll said:

Oh dear I am so very sorry that it’s turned out this way for you. I remember your initial move very well (wow, 3 years ago, time flies). You’re right though, every family (and we do try on here!) must be aware of The Hague Convention before they move. It’s trapped many unwary parents who might not want to remain in Australia in particular because if one parent says no, Aus won’t let them go except under very exceptional circumstances and (as you are no doubt discovering) at huge cost.

I really hope you get the resolution you want, especially as you are pregnant. 

3 years and still whinging! ? yeah, given it a go but nah. Not for me. Just gotta battle it out now and see the outcome. Thanks sweetheart thou, hope all is well with you ?

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I'm really sorry about everything that's gone wrong for you Huntersmummy.  I used to enjoy reading your posts - you always had such a great sense of humour in spite of disliking living in Darwin.  Have to say - Darwin wouldn't  be my cup of tea either.   I hope you manage to come to some sort of agreement with your husband about your children.

xx

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Nope, Darwin wouldn't be my cup of tea either.  One of my friends moved up there after falling for an army man.  She spent the first year in constant floods of tears.  She's doing better now, but only because she had her first child and is besotted with him, so that helps. Also she is into belly dancing and has managed to make friends up there through that.  But sometimes I see a touch of desperation in her Facebook posts still!

So sorry to hear it's all gone pear-shaped Huntersmummy.  I didn't have high hopes when you posted originally, but I never thought your husband would be such a %%%%^&&* about going home.

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18 hours ago, Huntersmummy said:

Good evening guys! Long time no posty! ?

well ive officially been in Darwin for 3 years now and bloody hate it. My old posts are between giving it a go and not liking it.....now it’s complete resentment. 

Im stuck in a family law case right now with wanting to return home with the kids but husband says no so I can’t just “go back home then” 

Straw that broke the expat back ? was a month ago I was punched in the head by an aboriginal bloke....not drunk either! Just angry because “””drum roll””” I asked him to stop begging for food off customers. I was just doing my job and security hadn’t started yet. 

Then a few days ago, few kids threatened to stab me in my pregnant belly because I wouldn’t buy them smokes and lollies. 

Being hurt or threatened can happen anywhere....I get that but come on! A non threatening pregnant woman? 

I hate this place. Firstly, immigration should warn you of the Hauge Convention law and secondly, yes I felt sorry for “most, not all” aboriginals when I first arrived but now.....nothing but abuse, being a white c**t, callings my kids names for not giving them $2.....biggest regret was moving here. 

Darwin is one of a kind. A massive turd hole to be precise. 

You are in a battle with your husband and also pregnant?

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Please be aware if you do decide to come over and it's not for you or you want to go back but hubby doesn't he can stop you taking the children back with you. There are many parents stuck here because their partner doesn't want to go back and won't allow the children to go back either. Under the Hague convention you cannot remove the children without consent from the country of residence which having migrated to Australia would be Australia. If as it seems you are reluctant i would consider everything very carefully. I know someone who is this situation and can't leave because of the children. Don't want to be negative at all just think all parents need to be aware of this. Good luck.

If only someone had said that before you moved. Shame really - but good luck with it all.
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6 hours ago, Sandgroper said:

You are in a battle with your husband and also pregnant?

Again as asked below, sexual frustration and I didn’t notice until it was too late. Mixture of medicine, coming off chemo so periods were all over the place etc. Hey everyone makes mistakes right? 

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10 hours ago, Marisawright said:

Nope, Darwin wouldn't be my cup of tea either.  One of my friends moved up there after falling for an army man.  She spent the first year in constant floods of tears.  She's doing better now, but only because she had her first child and is besotted with him, so that helps. Also she is into belly dancing and has managed to make friends up there through that.  But sometimes I see a touch of desperation in her Facebook posts still!

So sorry to hear it's all gone pear-shaped Huntersmummy.  I didn't have high hopes when you posted originally, but I never thought your husband would be such a %%%%^&&* about going home.

Thank you sweet. ? I’m making it manage for the kids and trying to keep as normal as poss for them. 

Its incredibly lonely here and making friends can either go both ways...there’s no in between here. 

Hoping tuesdays visit with the family lawyer will give me a bit of good news. 

Should of stuck to my guns 3 years ago and listened to my gut and stayed! ???

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12 hours ago, Toots said:

I'm really sorry about everything that's gone wrong for you Huntersmummy.  I used to enjoy reading your posts - you always had such a great sense of humour in spite of disliking living in Darwin.  Have to say - Darwin wouldn't  be my cup of tea either.   I hope you manage to come to some sort of agreement with your husband about your children.

xx

Ahaha it was always a pleasure putting a smile on faces with my posts. ?

ahhhhh making it work for the time being.....just sucks kangaroo balls having to share responsibility with another person  especially when kids are involved. ?

i could always just spike his morning cuppa with female hormones, let him grow titties and convince him the only place he’ll get treatment iS in the uk!!!! 

Far fetched but I’ll give anything a go! ???? xx

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23 hours ago, Huntersmummy said:

Nope ? part of the visa restrictions is we have to stay in the NT. TBH, after experiencing darwin life and the fact I’m a stubborn butthole, I could be offered a million dollars to move to Adelaide, Melbourne etc and it would be no thanks! I’m officially done! ?

So what visa are you on? Cos I know some have restrictions but I can't think of one that NEVER allows you to move.

And just to complicate things that new baby will be an ozzie citizen, as you and your OH are PR. Even less likely to get permission for removal. 

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Sorry to hear its not working out Huntersmum, 3 years in tells me you've given it a good shot. When would you qualify for citizenship? We seem to have had loads of posts this last month for people who have returned to the UK and now want to come back on RRV , its definitely something to think about before hopping back on the plane.

Is there anyway you can move to another state? I know your visa said NT but if its not working ,its not working and i know people who have had visa's for one area have moved interstate before. It could be a way to get Hubby to move.

Cal x

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You've managed 3 years up there so you are a bit of a hero in my book. I don't know the NT except for Darwin but was wondering if there are any other towns up there that might be an improvement?  Probably worse I suppose when I think of Katherine and Alice. I was also thinking if you had your new baby in the UK it might be better- think of some excuse to get back there with your kids and then just...stay.

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You've managed 3 years up there so you are a bit of a hero in my book. I don't know the NT except for Darwin but was wondering if there are any other towns up there that might be an improvement?  Probably worse I suppose when I think of Katherine and Alice. I was also thinking if you had your new baby in the UK it might be better- think of some excuse to get back there with your kids and then just...stay.

Nice idea but it makes no difference as long as he is resident in Australia, he can demand them back any time.

Hard to see where there could be any compromise here.
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Thanks to all you wonderful people for your advice and support. Really does tickle my pickle xxxxx

Had a restounding bit of good news which I don’t wanna jinx but husband has said 

“wait till we get our citizenship so this opportunity wouldn’t be wasted”

”let’s get out of debt first (credit card debt back home he’s still paying) and we’ll go from there” 

So it’s now not a definite NO.......

If I believed in Jesus I’d be toasting him a drink ? 

 

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1 hour ago, Huntersmummy said:

Thanks to all you wonderful people for your advice and support. Really does tickle my pickle xxxxx

Had a restounding bit of good news which I don’t wanna jinx but husband has said 

“wait till we get our citizenship so this opportunity wouldn’t be wasted”

”let’s get out of debt first (credit card debt back home he’s still paying) and we’ll go from there” 

So it’s now not a definite NO.......

If I believed in Jesus I’d be toasting him a drink ? 

 

That’s a start! Put a date on it though otherwise it will slip and slip past the point of no return!

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