Have we made a mistake of returning to the uk?!

[bristolman]

The simple fact is none of us can tell you whether you have made a mistake, only you can know that. My personal belief is that no you haven't but you need a bit longer to realise, just like us. We are now so glad we waited because we would be back in the same rut in Australia that we left. Having said this again I will say only you can know. 

[bunbury61]

On ‎17‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 20:44, bristolman said:

No, after 3 months I certainly don't think you have made a mistake. What you are experiencing is just normal and will totally change once you have settled and made some friends. 

We had similar feelings for 3 or 4 months but now wild horses wouldn't drag us back quite frankly. My wife says even if she has moments when she thinks about it she only has to think about the oppressive heat and how expensive it has become and the feelings soon disappear lol. Our Aussie born and bred kids have no interest in returning.

It really is normal, just give it time and remember why you made the move back. 

Oh and Melbourne certainly isn't somewhere I would choose to live again but we are all different. 

iam a bit different to you Bristol ....i left a life of freedom in oz , came back and landed myself with a world of responsibility ....not realising , that was the cue for my siblings in oz , to say " bonus , we haven't got to worry about mom and dad now , someone's taking care of that now "

I still feel heavily weighed down at times ...the upside , we have travelled so much ....and rural and semi rural u.k offers an enviable lifestyle .

I agree with you about Melbourne though ...it done absolutely nothing for me .

I can arrive in a place and get a positive or negative feel for it ,virtually straight away .

Melbourne didn't do It for me .

 

 

[bunbury61]

On ‎18‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 08:58, Anna833 said:

Thanks for all your comments and personal experiences. Everyone has their opinions on which is the better country to live and for their own family.
I think it's understanding what will ultimately be the best thing for my family and that will take a bit of time!
We are definitely lucky in that we have the option of living in both countries. I think whichever country you live in you'll miss the other in some way or have fond memories.

I do regret not immersing myself in our Australian life a little bit more as I was still clinging onto what we were missing back in the uk at the time. This is maybe why people don't settle and do choose to move back!

We shall give it a few years in the uk and try to quash the regrets we have of moving back. It's no good looking back now!!


Sent from my iPhone using PomsinOz

as I have said to people on here before ...even if you don't like the u.k , you are in the greatest continent on earth ...use it .

Paris, lucerne , Amsterdam , Munich , Prague , Oslo ,Moscow , Innsbruck ...Venice ...so much to see and do whilst you are here

[Imapla]

On 17/10/2017 at 15:03, Anna833 said:

Hi All,

We returned to the uk in July this year after living in Melbourne for nearly 4 years. We returned due to a mixture of missing family, friends (although most have drifted and moved on now), the countryside and of little things but the main reason was that I felt like my 19 month was missing out on building a relationship with his grandparents and cousins. It was also the isolation and a little bit of homesickness which was a major player as well. See, we have been back over 3 months now but I'm wondering whether we have been too hasty and instead should of come for an extended holiday rather than shipping our belongings and 2 cats back to the uk to live in a completely new area (only place my husband could find a job with his skills). As we don't know anyone nearby at the moment and I'm a stay at home mum I feel a little isolated even though we are back in the uk with family/friends an hour or so away. It's horrible having the thoughts of did we actually do the right thing!! Luckily we waited until we got citizenship in June to make the move back so we can always go back but how long do you wait before thinking that life is actually better in Australia? I think my husband is missing it slightly more than me. I'm just thinking now we are back, maybe we are looking through rose-tinted glasses at oz again and forget all the bad experiences we had over there. (mostly good though apart from missing family)

We came to a decision that we will see how things go over the next 2 or so years and make a firm decision of what we want to do prior to my son beginning school in 2021.

Has anyone else who has returned had these regrets and do they pass and or is anyone planning over relocating back to oz in the near future?

HI I knew the day I arrived back it was a mistake - I am still here 2 1/2 years on but going back sooooooooooon.  I have given it a couple of years and UK doesn't work for me -(I've had some great times over here but I just miss the lifestyle and weather too much - the big skies - the scenery - being outside - I can't handle being closed in for 7 months of the year)  you will get people in all situations - those who returned and are glad - those who didn't return and are still wondering if they should have, those who return and wish they hadn't and those that return and then go back to Aus (ping pong) - it all sounds easy 'just go back' but it is not - especially if you have animals and children involved !  But you have now experienced both places and are completely in a position to make the decision.  At least you tried returning to UK life - good luck with your decision.

[bristolman]

14 minutes ago, Imapla said:

HI I knew the day I arrived back it was a mistake - I am still here 2 1/2 years on but going back sooooooooooon.  I have given it a couple of years and UK doesn't work for me -(I've had some great times over here but I just miss the lifestyle and weather too much - the big skies - the scenery - being outside - I can't handle being closed in for 7 months of the year)  you will get people in all situations - those who returned and are glad - those who didn't return and are still wondering if they should have, those who return and wish they hadn't and those that return and then go back to Aus (ping pong) - it all sounds easy 'just go back' but it is not - especially if you have animals and children involved !  But you have now experienced both places and are completely in a position to make the decision.  At least you tried returning to UK life - good luck with your decision.

I must admit I wouldn't like to be closed in for 7 months either but not entirely sure why you would be really, 3 months in a bad year at most. But I do agree that you will get people in all situations, those like us who have totally fallen on our feet, those who know immediately it was wrong and those who are floating as yet undecided. 

As I have said before there is no one size fits all with countries, I find hot weather too limiting and draining while others are the opposite, the hotter the better. I like green and lush whereas others enjoy brown and dry. It would be a pretty boring world if we were all the same. 

[Guest]

6 hours ago, Imapla said:

HI I knew the day I arrived back it was a mistake - I am still here 2 1/2 years on but going back sooooooooooon.  I have given it a couple of years and UK doesn't work for me -(I've had some great times over here but I just miss the lifestyle and weather too much - the big skies - the scenery - being outside - I can't handle being closed in for 7 months of the year)  you will get people in all situations - those who returned and are glad - those who didn't return and are still wondering if they should have, those who return and wish they hadn't and those that return and then go back to Aus (ping pong) - it all sounds easy 'just go back' but it is not - especially if you have animals and children involved !  But you have now experienced both places and are completely in a position to make the decision.  At least you tried returning to UK life - good luck with your decision.

What's awesome about this @Imapla is that you gave it a go. I love the positivity of your post. The big blue skies, the weather, the scenery... love it I know exactly what you mean  The UK is not for you and you know what, that's ok! It is for millions, and it also isn't for millions... I may be in a position like you one day - longing to go back and I just might. But who really knows!

There's a big beautiful world out there for you, for us all! You're absolutely spot on when you say "those who returned and are glad - those who didn't return and are still wondering if they should have, those who return and wish they hadn't and those that return and then go back to Aus (ping pong)". It's different for everyone and anyone trying to tell someone on here that the UK for them, or not simply can't - it's not their life. I wish you all the very best with your journey back.

@Anna833 I hope this has given a lot of food for thought for you. I, and I'm sure many others wish you all the very best in whatever you decide. Whatever you do decide, it will be right for you and your family! All the best! PS PM me if you want to chat ever, we're all here for each other x

 

[MARYROSE02]

On 10/18/2017 at 01:03, Anna833 said:

Hi All,

We returned to the uk in July this year after living in Melbourne for nearly 4 years. We returned due to a mixture of missing family, friends (although most have drifted and moved on now), the countryside and of little things but the main reason was that I felt like my 19 month was missing out on building a relationship with his grandparents and cousins. It was also the isolation and a little bit of homesickness which was a major player as well. See, we have been back over 3 months now but I'm wondering whether we have been too hasty and instead should of come for an extended holiday rather than shipping our belongings and 2 cats back to the uk to live in a completely new area (only place my husband could find a job with his skills). As we don't know anyone nearby at the moment and I'm a stay at home mum I feel a little isolated even though we are back in the uk with family/friends an hour or so away. It's horrible having the thoughts of did we actually do the right thing!! Luckily we waited until we got citizenship in June to make the move back so we can always go back but how long do you wait before thinking that life is actually better in Australia? I think my husband is missing it slightly more than me. I'm just thinking now we are back, maybe we are looking through rose-tinted glasses at oz again and forget all the bad experiences we had over there. (mostly good though apart from missing family)

We came to a decision that we will see how things go over the next 2 or so years and make a firm decision of what we want to do prior to my son beginning school in 2021.

Has anyone else who has returned had these regrets and do they pass and or is anyone planning over relocating back to oz in the near future?

When I went back to England to live - as opposed to holidays - it took me a long while to settle, even with the benefit of living with my parents and part of the problem was that they had moved to a different village from where i grew up - only seven miles, but it still seemed like the 10,000 between OZ and UK. Eventually, I grew to like that new village so much it's now where I think I come from. I fancy that where you live now, though "only an hour" from your family, seems like much further because you can't just pop next door to see them.

My experience of moving from one place to another, even in the same country, is that it is often traumatic. I remember after living with my brothers in one Sydney suburb, they got married and I moved to another suburb many miles away where I knew nobody and I was instantly isolated.

You will probably make some new friends and start to feel like a local instead of a stranger, and as you are Australian citizens you always have the option of returning to OZ again.  After 12 years in England I moved back to Sydney and now it's nearly nine years back here. I've not been back to England since, though with my parents passed away there's no longer any incentive. I still like England of course and i'm worn out today after staying up all night watching Spurs v Liverpool but I'm finally settled.

I remember reading somewhere that over a million "New Chums" came out to OZ from the UK as "Ten Pound Poms" and as soon as they'd done the mandatory two years, a quarter of them returned to the UK, but of that quarter, half went back to Australia again, so you are not alone.

[ali]

On ‎21‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 13:15, Booma said:

i knew 3 months after returning to the uk it was a big mistake. my husband had never wanted to move back in the first place but he insisted we stay there for at least a couple of years to be sure i didnt change my mind again. we ended up moving back to oz after 2 years & this time i am much more settled. sometimes you just have to try things to know for sure.

I think that's so true, no-one can tell you how you're going to feel - I always thing that decisions are right for that moment in time for yourself and your family

[Bobths]

We moved back to the UK in April this year after living in Melbourne for 6 years - hubby was homesick and missed friends and family. 6 months in and he’s concluded that the UK just isn’t as good as he remembers and all the friends and family who “missed us like crazy” mostly haven’t bothered to visit or only see us when we trek up north to visit them. So now we’re starting the process of him transferring back to Melbourne (thankfully his employer paid for the move to the UK and they’re happy for him to transfer back when a position becomes available). Despite all the upheaval and costs it will have been worth it because now he says he knows for definite that Australia is the best place for our family. Needless to say, I cannot wait to move back, I never wanted to come back to the UK, just hope the transfer happens sooner rather than later as I really don’t want my kids to go to school in the UK and I’m very depressed here as we have no friends locally. 

[bristolman]

This is exactly the 'problem' with this sort of thing, of course many of us have come to the UK and absolutely love it and wouldn't dream of leaving and for others it's clearly been the wrong decision. Just the same as those who go to Australia in the first place. 

As an aside we were chatting to our boys yesterday about spiders of all things and during the conversation my eldest said 'well I didn't even like Australia', this from someone born and bred there but what it shows is there is nowhere that suits everyone.  

[Toots]

36 minutes ago, Bobths said:

We moved back to the UK in April this year after living in Melbourne for 6 years - hubby was homesick and missed friends and family. 6 months in and he’s concluded that the UK just isn’t as good as he remembers and all the friends and family who “missed us like crazy” mostly haven’t bothered to visit or only see us when we trek up north to visit them. So now we’re starting the process of him transferring back to Melbourne (thankfully his employer paid for the move to the UK and they’re happy for him to transfer back when a position becomes available). Despite all the upheaval and costs it will have been worth it because now he says he knows for definite that Australia is the best place for our family. Needless to say, I cannot wait to move back, I never wanted to come back to the UK, just hope the transfer happens sooner rather than later as I really don’t want my kids to go to school in the UK and I’m very depressed here as we have no friends locally. 

Well at least you now know and can settle for good once you are back in Australia.

[grizzly111]

If it makes you feel any better and if you have children, I can say that with some certainty from personal experience (unless things have changed dramatically), that the education system in the UK is superior. As a child that was extremely lucky to have been to some of the best schools in both the UK & Australia I could easily tell the difference. So if you have children, and even more so if they are academically inclined, then perhaps there is some comfort in knowing the UK should provide them with an education second to none. Good luck!

[bristolman]

1 minute ago, grizzly111 said:

If it makes you feel any better and if you have children, I can say that with some certainty from personal experience (unless things have changed dramatically), that the education system in the UK is superior. As a child that was extremely lucky to have been to some of the best schools in both the UK & Australia I could easily tell the difference. So if you have children, and even more so if they are academically inclined, then perhaps there is some comfort in knowing the UK should provide them with an education second to none. Good luck!

Yes, agree totally. 

[Wa7]

2 hours ago, Bobths said:

We moved back to the UK in April this year after living in Melbourne for 6 years - hubby was homesick and missed friends and family. 6 months in and he’s concluded that the UK just isn’t as good as he remembers and all the friends and family who “missed us like crazy” mostly haven’t bothered to visit or only see us when we trek up north to visit them. So now we’re starting the process of him transferring back to Melbourne (thankfully his employer paid for the move to the UK and they’re happy for him to transfer back when a position becomes available). Despite all the upheaval and costs it will have been worth it because now he says he knows for definite that Australia is the best place for our family. Needless to say, I cannot wait to move back, I never wanted to come back to the UK, just hope the transfer happens sooner rather than later as I really don’t want my kids to go to school in the UK and I’m very depressed here as we have no friends locally. 

Any reason why you didn't move back and be a little closer to friends + family ( I don't mean on their doorstep but 15 - 20 mins ish drive ) Could this have made it better maybe?

Very short amount of time to make this decision, if someone did the same coming to Australia they would be told to give it longer.

Good luck with it all either way.

 

Edited November 1, 2017 by Wa7

[Bobths]

Just now, Wa7 said:

Any reason why you didn't move back and be a little closer to friends + family ( I don't mean on their doorstep but 15 mins ish drive ) Could this have made it better maybe?

Very short amount of time to make this decision, if someone did the same coming to Australia they would be told to give it longer.

Good luck with it all either way.

 

Hubby has to work in London and his family & friends mostly live in and around Manchester. My parents live in France & my bro moved to NZ - my parents visited us for 6 weeks every year so they never wanted us to come back to the UK. We do live 20 mins drive from hubby’s sister (the only reason we moved where we did in the UK!!) but she hasn’t really bothered to see us or has cancelled on plans we’ve made to meet up - I feel v sad for hubby as he pictured Sunday afternoons at each other’s houses, all our kids playing together..... and it’s just not happened, not for want of trying on our part. 

[Bobths]

29 minutes ago, Wa7 said:

Any reason why you didn't move back and be a little closer to friends + family ( I don't mean on their doorstep but 15 - 20 mins ish drive ) Could this have made it better maybe?

Very short amount of time to make this decision, if someone did the same coming to Australia they would be told to give it longer.

Good luck with it all either way.

 

And yes, I totally agree 6 months isn’t long but we have a 4yo due to start school in Aus in Feb 2019 so we need to start the ball rolling on getting transferred back so she can get into one of the good schools near our house in Australia. We partly chose our rental here because it had 3 good schools nearby.... turns out we only stand a chance of getting her in the closest one, which isn’t oversubscribed because it feeds into one of the worst junior schools in the county. From everything I’ve heard at work and witnessed for myself, the schools are pretty bad around here hence I want to get her into the school system back in Aus - plus my 2yo is a late July baby and I don’t want her starting school when she’s only just turned 4yo (she’ll be 5 and a half when she starts school in Aus).

[Wa7]

10 minutes ago, Bobths said:

And yes, I totally agree 6 months isn’t long but we have a 4yo due to start school in Aus in Feb 2019 so we need to start the ball rolling on getting transferred back so she can get into one of the good schools near our house in Australia. We partly chose our rental here because it had 3 good schools nearby.... turns out we only stand a chance of getting her in the closest one, which isn’t oversubscribed because it feeds into one of the worst junior schools in the county. From everything I’ve heard at work and witnessed for myself, the schools are pretty bad around here hence I want to get her into the school system back in Aus - plus my 2yo is a late July baby and I don’t want her starting school when she’s only just turned 4yo (she’ll be 5 and a half when she starts school in Aus).

As long as you feel you have give it your best shot, do what you feel you need to do and what's best for your family.

[Zack]

We have decided to return to the UK. While  we are fit enough to do so And the exchange rate is in our favour.. We came to Australia in 1986 . Can't realy pin point when the rot set in.But i began taking all the anti pom atitude to heart.And all the Aussie this Aussie that, realy got on my nerves,They never stop bragging and boasting..So in 2013 We decided to go back home .I'm from the North East and my wife is from London. I still have all the friends i had  from when i was born,and we all  lived in the same street.So we bought a house in the North East.She got on with all my friends ,but she always felt the odd one out .We went out much more than we ever did in Australia,to the Club on  saturday nights, danceing and watching shows put on at the club. I went out with the lads on wednesday nights.And out to have a look arround the markets or car boot sales on Sundays.As far as York and up to Scotland,  then had a meal  in  a pub somwhere.One of my wifes sisters lives in Aylesbury in Buckinghamshire. They also had a house boat .And we'd go sailing down the Thames as far as Windsor Castle. the scenery is jaw dropping,with pubs you can moor at and have a drink.The Lake Districk we lived a hours drive away is so Beautiful aswell. And the Aussies brag on and on,and say how blessed the are  being Australian and living in the best place in the world?It's just not so. So anyhow our daughter back in Australia had big  problems .So we decided to come back. in 2014  Big Mistake. I'm worse now than when i left in 2013. Just can't stand it here.It's like living in a  Cemetery.Plus the Government say they are  deporting people with duel citizenship ,if they break the law,or get ill and are deemed to become a burden on the Australian Heath service.They will have their Australian Citizenship cancelled and  will be deported.Not that it worries me. But what about these poms that have taken out Citizenship and think they have completly  changed, and become Australian's after the ceromony Some say they feel so different? Well that's that myth shot down in flames.Australia after you have worked here most your adult life dosen't really want you.!.Your Australian Citizensip is not worth the paper it's written on. 1038 A mixture of Nationals ,Including Kiwi's and Brit's have been deported in the last 12 months. For an aray of reasons. even road  rage incidents. ecuse my spelling etc my spell check is not working,And some pompus poms on here are sure to say somthing? And the anti Zack brigade.

[Toots]

11 minutes ago, Zack said:

We have decided to return to the UK. While  we are fit enough to do so And the exchange rate is in our favour.. We came to Australia in 1986 . Can't realy pin point when the rot set in.But i began taking all the anti pom atitude to heart.And all the Aussie this Aussie that, realy got on my nerves,They never stop bragging and boasting..So in 2013 We decided to go back home .I'm from the North East and my wife is from London. I still have all the friends i had  from when i was born,and we all  lived in the same street.So we bought a house in the North East.She got on with all my friends ,but she always felt the odd one out .We went out much more than we ever did in Australia,to the Club on  saturday nights, danceing and watching shows put on at the club. I went out with the lads on wednesday nights.And out to have a look arround the markets or car boot sales on Sundays.As far as York and up to Scotland,  then had a meal  in  a pub somwhere.One of my wifes sisters lives in Aylesbury in Buckinghamshire. They also had a house boat .And we'd go sailing down the Thames as far as Windsor Castle. the scenery is jaw dropping,with pubs you can moor at and have a drink.The Lake Districk we lived a hours drive away is so Beautiful aswell. And the Aussies brag on and on,and say how blessed the are  being Australian and living in the best place in the world?It's just not so. So anyhow our daughter back in Australia had big  problems .So we decided to come back. in 2014  Big Mistake. I'm worse now than when i left in 2013. Just can't stand it here.It's like living in a  Cemetery.Plus the Government say they are  deporting people with duel citizenship ,if they break the law,or get ill and are deemed to become a burden on the Australian Heath service.They will have their Australian Citizenship cancelled and  will be deported.Not that it worries me. But what about these poms that have taken out Citizenship and think they have completly  changed, and become Australian's after the ceromony Some say they feel so different? Well that's that myth shot down in flames.Australia after you have worked here most your adult life dosen't really want you.!.Your Australian Citizensip is not worth the paper it's written on. 1038 A mixture of Nationals ,Including Kiwi's and Brit's have been deported in the last 12 months. For an aray of reasons. even road  rage incidents. ecuse my spelling etc my spell check is not working,And some pompus poms on here are sure to say somthing? And the anti Zack brigade.

I wish you all the very best Zack.  It's no life if you're not happy and hate Australia so much.  

I worked here most of my adult life and am now retired and life is good and it's not in my imagination.  Husband and I are very happy.  So obviously life here works out for some people but not others.  Hey, I'm not a pompous Pom either.  I just tell it like it is (for me) just as you let us know your side of the story. 

I'm happy for you now that you have decided to return to the UK.  Will you be going back to the North East?  I've got a few friends there.

[Parley]

Zach, that is only ISIS terrorist fighting in Syria who can have their citizenship cancelled if they are a dual citizen.

It is actually based on the UK system I believe so not sure what you are on about. UK does the same thing. In practice it hasn't actually happened anyway I believe as I don't think any ISIS fighters in Syria or Iraq have tried to get back to Australia

They are deporting non citizen criminals particularly bikies and organised crime figures, quite a few to New Zealand.

Maybe that is what you are getting confused about ?

 

[ssiri]

If it makes you feel any better and if you have children, I can say that with some certainty from personal experience (unless things have changed dramatically), that the education system in the UK is superior. As a child that was extremely lucky to have been to some of the best schools in both the UK & Australia I could easily tell the difference. So if you have children, and even more so if they are academically inclined, then perhaps there is some comfort in knowing the UK should provide them with an education second to none. Good luck!

In the University/tertiary education sector - undoubtably. I'm not so convinced when it comes to UK primary and secondary schooling. The discus in the U.K. is now assessments, and narrow focus on some subjects (some of which are questionable as to why they even figure on the curriculum).

The quality of GCSEs and A Levels aren't what they used to be - in terms of academic/critical thinking and the number of students who pass them with flying colours is evidence of that. Most Brits question their quality in comparison to the standards upheld, pre 1995 or so. I can't comment on the Oz system at all however.

[bristolman]

8 hours ago, Zack said:

We have decided to return to the UK. While  we are fit enough to do so And the exchange rate is in our favour.. We came to Australia in 1986 . Can't realy pin point when the rot set in.But i began taking all the anti pom atitude to heart.And all the Aussie this Aussie that, realy got on my nerves,They never stop bragging and boasting..So in 2013 We decided to go back home .I'm from the North East and my wife is from London. I still have all the friends i had  from when i was born,and we all  lived in the same street.So we bought a house in the North East.She got on with all my friends ,but she always felt the odd one out .We went out much more than we ever did in Australia,to the Club on  saturday nights, danceing and watching shows put on at the club. I went out with the lads on wednesday nights.And out to have a look arround the markets or car boot sales on Sundays.As far as York and up to Scotland,  then had a meal  in  a pub somwhere.One of my wifes sisters lives in Aylesbury in Buckinghamshire. They also had a house boat .And we'd go sailing down the Thames as far as Windsor Castle. the scenery is jaw dropping,with pubs you can moor at and have a drink.The Lake Districk we lived a hours drive away is so Beautiful aswell. And the Aussies brag on and on,and say how blessed the are  being Australian and living in the best place in the world?It's just not so. So anyhow our daughter back in Australia had big  problems .So we decided to come back. in 2014  Big Mistake. I'm worse now than when i left in 2013. Just can't stand it here.It's like living in a  Cemetery.Plus the Government say they are  deporting people with duel citizenship ,if they break the law,or get ill and are deemed to become a burden on the Australian Heath service.They will have their Australian Citizenship cancelled and  will be deported.Not that it worries me. But what about these poms that have taken out Citizenship and think they have completly  changed, and become Australian's after the ceromony Some say they feel so different? Well that's that myth shot down in flames.Australia after you have worked here most your adult life dosen't really want you.!.Your Australian Citizensip is not worth the paper it's written on. 1038 A mixture of Nationals ,Including Kiwi's and Brit's have been deported in the last 12 months. For an aray of reasons. even road  rage incidents. ecuse my spelling etc my spell check is not working,And some pompus poms on here are sure to say somthing? And the anti Zack brigade.

So much of what you say resonates with us, the constant never ending need to try and big note themselves and the Aussie Aussie Aussie thing. Its media driven but people just lap it up. Strayas the best place in the world mate, oh where have you been, I ain't been anywhere mate..best country in the world, Pauline said so. 

Years ago I would argue black and blue that Australia was indeed the best country in the world and I'm not entirely sure when it changed but I started seeing through all the bluster and self congratulation and came to the conclusion that it really wasn't the best country in the world, it was up there but no. 

[Anna833]

We moved back to the UK in April this year after living in Melbourne for 6 years - hubby was homesick and missed friends and family. 6 months in and he’s concluded that the UK just isn’t as good as he remembers and all the friends and family who “missed us like crazy” mostly haven’t bothered to visit or only see us when we trek up north to visit them. So now we’re starting the process of him transferring back to Melbourne (thankfully his employer paid for the move to the UK and they’re happy for him to transfer back when a position becomes available). Despite all the upheaval and costs it will have been worth it because now he says he knows for definite that Australia is the best place for our family. Needless to say, I cannot wait to move back, I never wanted to come back to the UK, just hope the transfer happens sooner rather than later as I really don’t want my kids to go to school in the UK and I’m very depressed here as we have no friends locally. 

We relate to this as we moved back in July this year (my husband was quite happy to stay but I was missing family and friends) we have a 20 month old and I felt that we should be closer to form relationships. We have been back nearly 4 months but we are not settling too well partly as we moved an hour away from family/friends as my husband couldn’t get a job closer. It feels like friends who we were missing have not really made the effort to come and visit and it seems to be always us visiting them and family. I understand they have moved on but I think that now we are back home it’s gone back to what it used to be and their taking us for granted of us being closer.
I understand 4 months is definitely not long enough to make a decision so we have made the decision to decide prior to when my son starts school in 3 years (or a little sooner). Hopefully by then we will have some more clarity on where we want to bring up our family.
Everyone is different and has different wants and needs so some will feel happier in Oz, some in Uk! Least we have the opportunities to live in both countries.

[bristolman]

4 minutes ago, Anna833 said:

 

We relate to this as we moved back in July this year (my husband was quite happy to stay but I was missing family and friends) we have a 20 month old and I felt that we should be closer to form relationships. We have been back nearly 4 months but we are not settling too well partly as we moved an hour away from family/friends as my husband couldn’t get a job closer. It feels like friends who we were missing have not really made the effort to come and visit and it seems to be always us visiting them and family. I understand they have moved on but I think that now we are back home it’s gone back to what it used to be and their taking us for granted of us being closer.
I understand 4 months is definitely not long enough to make a decision so we have made the decision to decide prior to when my son starts school in 3 years (or a little sooner). Hopefully by then we will have some more clarity on where we want to bring up our family.
Everyone is different and has different wants and needs so some will feel happier in Oz, some in Uk! Least we have the opportunities to live in both countries.

 

As it turned out we bought a house 90 minutes away from our friends in the SW but we see them regularly. We have to remember that we all have lives to lead. 4 months is no time at all, we were ready to pack up and move back around that point but so glad we didn't as things have worked out so well.

Stick with it, it's normal. 

[Bobths]

7 hours ago, Anna833 said:

 

We relate to this as we moved back in July this year (my husband was quite happy to stay but I was missing family and friends) we have a 20 month old and I felt that we should be closer to form relationships. We have been back nearly 4 months but we are not settling too well partly as we moved an hour away from family/friends as my husband couldn’t get a job closer. It feels like friends who we were missing have not really made the effort to come and visit and it seems to be always us visiting them and family. I understand they have moved on but I think that now we are back home it’s gone back to what it used to be and their taking us for granted of us being closer.
I understand 4 months is definitely not long enough to make a decision so we have made the decision to decide prior to when my son starts school in 3 years (or a little sooner). Hopefully by then we will have some more clarity on where we want to bring up our family.
Everyone is different and has different wants and needs so some will feel happier in Oz, some in Uk! Least we have the opportunities to live in both countries.

 

Yes, we are defo v lucky to have the choice between the two countries. I know my opinion on the UK is clouded by the fact my mummy friends are all in Australia (having had both our children there) and I’m a total sun worshipper, love the great outdoors but only if it’s warm and sunny. Primary schools are a big factor too, as we have a 4yo & 2yo - nursery applications for the 2yo open on Monday along with applications for reception for my 4yo. Crazy crazy. I’m pulling my eldest out of nursery because it’s just been an unpleasant experience all round so far for various reasons. I went to see my GP yesterday and she’s put me on anti- depressants so hopefully that will help get me through until we can get back to Aus. 

I hope you get the clarity you need and it’s an easy decision for you to make when the time comes xx