Moving back to the UK in February

[Perthbum]

If the kids are settled that's worth everything. If you struggled before, you will struggle again. Its gotten right expensive down there.

 

One of the last times we went shopping in Perth, we paid the equivalent of £5 for a small packet of almost out of date fatty minced beef which you can get here in Aldi for £1.30 and its even better quality and more fresh too. They have very low quality food down there, bleeding expensive and compared to our huge modern supermarkets the choice is downright awful. Just a rip off, overpriced, over rated, overvalued place.

 

One of the reasons I love UK aside from the obvious family and friends is I have far more money in my hand, we eat good fresh reasonable priced food (massive choice of food too),we travel more, do more, go out more, and while we may not have sunny weather (we hated the burning suffocating dry heat anyway) we ourselves have a better standard of life here.

 

I would pick a place and stick with it. Best to settle down and try to avoid looking back at what you had. If you keep floating back and forth not knowing what you really want, you may end up getting stuck in the wrong place with an empty bank account.

 

If you are able to, put it the whole ozzie adventure behind you and focus on the future and the positives of what you have in your life.

 

The problems which drove you out before, will resurface in no time after the honeymoon period and they will drive you out again (if you still have any money left for another move).

 

Ping ponging is an expensive hobby !!

good post

[Croft]

I know exactly how you feel. We moved to oz in 2013 3 boys. Fell in love with oz but we really struggled with finances i thought it was really expensive and trying for hubby to get licences to work was a nightmare. Came back to uk in march 2016 for a holiday missed family had great time and was really upset to leave cried eyes out on plane. Returned to oz carried on struggling sometimes couldnt put food on table an thought yes its amazing but whats the point if you cant live the way you want to. So sold up moved back to uk been back 6 months and i just cant settle i miss oz so much. Hubby has good job here kids settled into new schools but i just cant shake the feeling we hve made a big mistake and should of stayed. So i know how you feel its really hard choice.

 

Read your post with interest. We went back to for a month to the UK (family and friends) and Spain (mother-in-law and one of our friends) over Christmas after moving to Brisbane in October 2013. It was nice to see family but, maybe because we packed too much in, we were more than ready to go back after 3 weeks. In fact my six year old son, who up to then had regularly made comments about wanting to go back to England, asked us when we were going back as he wanted to use our pool, see his friends and our cat! It was almost a relief to get back to our own house we'd recently bought and catch up with all the friends we've made here. The other big lesson we got from the trip back is that in our late 40s long haul Economy is now just too cramped and uncomfortable!

 

Life is not all roses though. My wife has a well paid job but she is not happy in it and looking to change. Fortunately, as a very experience Physiotherapist there is no shortage of good jobs. I'm still looking for regular employment (not helped by the fact we've completely changed areas and I have only been qualified just over a year) but relief teaching pays well! Unlike yourself though, we are much better off and more settled than in the UK.

[deryans]

I thought Sydney was awful, a pretty low quality of life for most, and Adelaide was dull.

 

Perth was dull, but Adelaide really takes the biscuit.

 

 

I suppose it depends on when and where you were in SYD, we were lucky to experience the millennium in London, then SYD and grew our family for 10 years in SYD from early 2000 to 2011 with a very high quality of life (park water shore and 15 min bike or 20 min ferry ride to city), back then it was actually is a pretty cool place to work and for kids to grow up and we did one and a thousand things together, from travelling all over OZ by light plane to just well.......fun life with kids..in an inner city kind of oasis. I don't think that's possible now without a few million and to be honest, I don't think the community is there anymore.

 

Moved to Ad-dull-ade in 2012 for family... place is a disgrace compared to well, most other places........ now in East Sussex which we love and is beautiful, Adelaide is a special insidious place, which in retrospect I'm glad we did not like it there as to become accepting and accustomed to such mediocrity would be a very unfair mantle to my children.

 

Kids love it here, well integrated into schools, seasons are what you make of it, they built a snow man last week, been all over europe and then some in the last two years, little sponges..

 

But, to confirm you are right, Adelaide does indeed take the biscuit..

[Scousers1]

We have been living in Melbourne for 28 years and brought up 1 daughter here. Parents and other family came out 20 years ago. I think the hardest thing is aging in a place that is not your home. I loved OZ for a long time, and OZ has been good to us, but as we are all getting older I absolutely hate seeing my parents here. They are depressed and the friends they did make have all passed away, too me they should be at home but are now to frail to make the journey. The way I see it is that at home they would have so many old friends and different gererations of family around them.

 

I find living here now a daily struggle and am terrified of our futures here. Over the years we have had lots of friends in Melbourne but it is a transient place and we are now left with very few friends, they have either moved overseas or interstate etc. I also feel like I just can't be bothered to make new friends anymore.

 

To make things even more difficult because our daughter has been brought up in OZ, she thinks like the Aussies do, we are clashing a lot which I would never have seen coming, we were once very close. I guess this may get better when she is a little older but difficult right now.

 

I would love love to return to the UK, I would just love to be back in my home town, I was there in Aug and had the best time as I always do when I go over there. Always hate coming back.

 

After all of my ramblings what I would say is, it's ok to just consider jobs, houses, where you will live etc, but also try to picture your future and what you want that to look like when making your decisions, the future comes around very quickly, do you want o end up living in different countries to your children and grandchildren one day? There are so many things to consider.

[Quoll]

We have been living in Melbourne for 28 years and brought up 1 daughter here. Parents and other family came out 20 years ago. I think the hardest thing is aging in a place that is not your home. I loved OZ for a long time, and OZ has been good to us, but as we are all getting older I absolutely hate seeing my parents here. They are depressed and the friends they did make have all passed away, too me they should be at home but are now to frail to make the journey. The way I see it is that at home they would have so many old friends and different gererations of family around them.

 

I find living here now a daily struggle and am terrified of our futures here. Over the years we have had lots of friends in Melbourne but it is a transient place and we are now left with very few friends, they have either moved overseas or interstate etc. I also feel like I just can't be bothered to make new friends anymore.

 

To make things even more difficult because our daughter has been brought up in OZ, she thinks like the Aussies do, we are clashing a lot which I would never have seen coming, we were once very close. I guess this may get better when she is a little older but difficult right now.

 

I would love love to return to the UK, I would just love to be back in my home town, I was there in Aug and had the best time as I always do when I go over there. Always hate coming back.

 

After all of my ramblings what I would say is, it's ok to just consider jobs, houses, where you will live etc, but also try to picture your future and what you want that to look like when making your decisions, the future comes around very quickly, do you want o end up living in different countries to your children and grandchildren one day? There are so many things to consider.

 

I am missing the "like" button - good post!

 

I think it is more difficult the older you get and there is a real tendency to need to go back to your own place in your declining years. I certainly see that my parents have a friendship group that I could never aspire to - of my Aussie "friends" only two (both long term expats) bothered to comment when I told them my mum had died. Can't imagine that any of them would be there for me if I needed them. That transient friendship thing is true for Canberra too - is a very mobile population.

 

I hope you do get to be where you want to be, it's actually very liberating! Your daughter may come around - one of mine came on holiday to UK 15 years ago and never returned and the other came on holiday and said he would like to live in UK but he has parental responsibility and can't but he's very envious of us I when it's hot - he can't stand the heat! Both, in their teens were very Aussie!

[lesleybruck]

This is how most of us feel when we are young and full of zest, we felt like that too. But being a foreign migrant in another country very far away from your family is nothing you can imagine until you give it a go, so you cant blame anyone for giving it a try. Many migrants return home, it just ain't for them.

 

In our case we had it good before we left, a loving family around us, true friends, great jobs, plenty of money to spend, good social life, great holidays on our doorstep and a good standard of living but we just wanted more despite having it all. Aus made our lives worse, we lost everything we once took for granted.

 

Many will go and many will return, its always been that way, but the younger you go the better chance you have. Don't go if you are middle aged/over 35.

 

We was exactly the same had business here sold everything, had good lives in uk just like you say great holidays every yr lovely cars etc but felt there was something missing moved to Aus lost everything now back in uk pennyless. Like you said i totally agree you need to be younger as older you are harder it is and more you lose if doesnt work out. But i do miss Aus despite our experiences.

[Melbpom]

We have been living in Melbourne for 28 years and brought up 1 daughter here. Parents and other family came out 20 years ago. I think the hardest thing is aging in a place that is not your home. I loved OZ for a long time, and OZ has been good to us, but as we are all getting older I absolutely hate seeing my parents here. They are depressed and the friends they did make have all passed away, too me they should be at home but are now to frail to make the journey. The way I see it is that at home they would have so many old friends and different gererations of family around them.

 

I find living here now a daily struggle and am terrified of our futures here. Over the years we have had lots of friends in Melbourne but it is a transient place and we are now left with very few friends, they have either moved overseas or interstate etc. I also feel like I just can't be bothered to make new friends anymore.

 

To make things even more difficult because our daughter has been brought up in OZ, she thinks like the Aussies do, we are clashing a lot which I would never have seen coming, we were once very close. I guess this may get better when she is a little older but difficult right now.

 

I would love love to return to the UK, I would just love to be back in my home town, I was there in Aug and had the best time as I always do when I go over there. Always hate coming back.

 

After all of my ramblings what I would say is, it's ok to just consider jobs, houses, where you will live etc, but also try to picture your future and what you want that to look like when making your decisions, the future comes around very quickly, do you want o end up living in different countries to your children and grandchildren one day? There are so many things to consider.

 

Scousers1, so much of your history mirrors mine, I came from Liverpool and will have been here for 29 years come April. Similarly my parents came over and so did my brother.

My story differs in that all my family have recently retuned and if I am to return also, it will mean leaving behind my youngest son.

Don't give up on returning yourself. Are you sure your parents are too old to move? mine are mid 70's and managed no problem. I

As for grandchildren it may be a long time before any come along and who knows were your daughter might be. She just might find Europe a whole lot more interesting (like my nieces do).

[Scousers1]

I am missing the "like" button - good post!

 

I think it is more difficult the older you get and there is a real tendency to need to go back to your own place in your declining years. I certainly see that my parents have a friendship group that I could never aspire to - of my Aussie "friends" only two (both long term expats) bothered to comment when I told them my mum had died. Can't imagine that any of them would be there for me if I needed them. That transient friendship thing is true for Canberra too - is a very mobile population.

 

I hope you do get to be where you want to be, it's actually very liberating! Your daughter may come around - one of mine came on holiday to UK 15 years ago and never returned and the other came on holiday and said he would like to live in UK but he has parental responsibility and can't but he's very envious of us I when it's hot - he can't stand the heat! Both, in their teens were very Aussie!

i also think my daughter would like the UK if she would just give it a chance, but at the moment she is not interested. She is fairly introverted and is not big on meeting new people so I don't think long term this life style will suit her. Hopefully once she is out of her teens she will change her mind.

 

So so sorry to hear about your mum quoll, cannot imagine how that must be, but at least you were in the U.K and not here when it happened. It would make you feel so much better to see all there friends around them in their later years. Best wishes to you all at this sad time.

[Scousers1]

Scousers1, so much of your history mirrors mine, I came from Liverpool and will have been here for 29 years come April. Similarly my parents came over and so did my brother.

My story differs in that all my family have recently retuned and if I am to return also, it will mean leaving behind my youngest son.

Don't give up on returning yourself. Are you sure your parents are too old to move? mine are mid 70's and managed no problem. I

As for grandchildren it may be a long time before any come along and who knows were your daughter might be. She just might find Europe a whole lot more interesting (like my nieces do).

Hi Melbpom, wow it does sound so similar to my storey! I was there in Aug and had such a fab time with all the friends and rello's and I just don't know why we are here anymore. My parents unfortunately are now 80 (mum) and 85 (dad) and not in good health the last couple of years, they would much prefer to be over there now but there is no way they could do the flght which is heartbreaking for them and me. Can I ask what m made your family go back? I am finding I cannot be bothered with people here anymore as we really have nothing in common and it is too hard to try anymore. How old is your son and how will you feel about leaving him? I wonder sometimes if I will have to leave my daughter here on day once it gets to a stage when I just cannot stay any longer. My daughter loves history etc and I know she would love Europe with its diversity but just not willing to listen yet. Where in Liverpool are you from?

[familyinoz]

Sorry to hear about your mum Quoll. ?

[Melbpom]

Hi Melbpom, wow it does sound so similar to my storey! I was there in Aug and had such a fab time with all the friends and rello's and I just don't know why we are here anymore. My parents unfortunately are now 80 (mum) and 85 (dad) and not in good health the last couple of years, they would much prefer to be over there now but there is no way they could do the flght which is heartbreaking for them and me. Can I ask what m made your family go back? I am finding I cannot be bothered with people here anymore as we really have nothing in common and it is too hard to try anymore. How old is your son and how will you feel about leaving him? I wonder sometimes if I will have to leave my daughter here on day once it gets to a stage when I just cannot stay any longer. My daughter loves history etc and I know she would love Europe with its diversity but just not willing to listen yet. Where in Liverpool are you from?

 

Hi Scousers1, in answer as to why my family moved back, well it started with my brother. I don't really think he settled and had always struggled financially. Now that he is back he has thrived and so has his Australian born wife and daughters. Only last week they were taking a mini break in Europe and that would have been impossible before. I have to give credit to his wife because she'd never been overseas and it could easily have gone pear shaped. I think this made my parents re-assess where they wanted to be and how they wanted to spend old age. The heat was getting to them as it does the ill and the old, and then there's their brothers and sisters. I've said so many times in the past that Australia's wonderful, I'd never go back and I think that's probably because I didn't have a choice, but now I have. My youngest is about to turn 20 and I've given him a ticket back to the UK for a holiday in June so that he can explore and stay with his rellies. I will miss him but I know he will visit and maybe when he leaves university he will find a job in Europe. I don't know when it's the right time to stretch the ties with children. If I felt he really needed me I'd stay. Regarding your daughter, could you book a trip back with her and give her a taste of Europe and family?

I grew up in Crosby, just north of the city. I've assumed you are from Liverpool too, can I ask where?

[Petals]

Quoll sorry for your loss. Did not know but then not around much now.

 

I think getting old is the problem for most people. The problem as I see it is that our friends and peers get old too and they have health problems, they pass away. I am older and I am a widow, I still have my mum here and she is 97 and only went into care recently as she has all her marbles etc. They lose their friends wherever they are. We have different friends at different times. I have family in the UK but they have their lives and I have mine. My sister in law is coming out to see me in April and that will be lovely but that is all we need month here and there as we are both the same age. Looking at my mum once they get into their eighties they are not miserable about friends, they are miserable about being old and often they have health problems. Lets face it my brain wants to go to party and have a good time and I accept invitations, however I often don't go because the body is not up to the brain.

 

So sit down and talk to the older people. Since mum went into the hostel she has got better and she will be 98 in April. Its a fab place and the carers are wonderful but then again they do not really make friends any more. They nap, they eat and they pretend to hear ha ha and lets face it its gods waiting room. I was gobsmacked to hear about Mary Tyler Moor and said to my friend who has leukemia gosh another 9 years does not seem long to live ha ha.

 

We cannot go back when we are old because everyone else is old and its the old age thing, all downhill to the grim reaper unfortunately.

\

[Guest The Pom Queen]

 

@Quoll I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I know how much your parents mean to you and how you went back to care for them. Please always remember that you got to spend that extra time and were there when she needed you most. All my love Kate

[Wa7]

Hi Scousers1, in answer as to why my family moved back, well it started with my brother. I don't really think he settled and had always struggled financially. Now that he is back he has thrived and so has his Australian born wife and daughters. Only last week they were taking a mini break in Europe and that would have been impossible before. I have to give credit to his wife because she'd never been overseas and it could easily have gone pear shaped. I think this made my parents re-assess where they wanted to be and how they wanted to spend old age. The heat was getting to them as it does the ill and the old, and then there's their brothers and sisters. I've said so many times in the past that Australia's wonderful, I'd never go back and I think that's probably because I didn't have a choice, but now I have. My youngest is about to turn 20 and I've given him a ticket back to the UK for a holiday in June so that he can explore and stay with his rellies. I will miss him but I know he will visit and maybe when he leaves university he will find a job in Europe. I don't know when it's the right time to stretch the ties with children. If I felt he really needed me I'd stay. Regarding your daughter, could you book a trip back with her and give her a taste of Europe and family?

I grew up in Crosby, just north of the city. I've assumed you are from Liverpool too, can I ask where?

 

 

I am sure you are not alone in this situation and how over the years you have become " stuck" here.

 

Best wishes and whatever it is you need to do, do it.

[roborac]

To anybody who is thinking of emigrating to Adelaide and has read those negative threads that have been posted lately , I can assure you we have loved every minute of our lives here, as well as our daughters who have done so well here in their personnel and professional lives We would never lay blame on the place we left , just praise on the place we live and enjoy now

[bristolman]

In fairness South Australia has the highest unemployment rate of any State and will get worse and that can influence the way people see a place. Having said that I like Adelaide, not to live but to visit.

[Disney]

In fairness South Australia has the highest unemployment rate of any State and will get worse and that can influence the way people see a place. Having said that I like Adelaide, not to live but to visit.

 

Yes I agree about unemployment set to get worse, Holden are going to close later this year so that is going to have a huge effect on unemployment and a lot of other businesses.

[lismith25]

Hi, we have just returned from a 3 week holiday in uk, lots of travelling and catching up with family, great time. For at least 2 yrs before i have had bouts of homesickness, country pubs beautiful scenery and villages, went and did all those things lots of times and it was great. Its weird as homesickness has gone, had a great holiday but feel OZ has a bit more going on for us. But i think either choice is good as long as you give it a go UK surprised me, weather was cold but still got out and did things. Wife and kids loved the cold and it wasnt good coming back into the north qld heat and humidity, but a move to brisbane is a lot cheaper than move to uk and we can both transfer our jobs. Cairns is a great place and somewhere else we looked at but want somewhere that has a bit of a winter.

Good luck either country has good and bad points but i see lots of happy people in the uk as well as australia.

[Pixie77]

I am sure you are not alone in this situation and how over the years you have become " stuck" here.

 

Best wishes and whatever it is you need to do, do it.

 

 

 

Been here in SA for 5 years & had 2 kids here. Went home in October & we both had that moment of why are we in oz &all our family in uk (lpool) ? So we're waiting to sell up &move while kids are little & my parents etc still in good health. Just don't see us aging here ..... want to go home

[Conniebygaslight]

It's a while since I've been on this site but saw this post and felt that I would offer my two penneth.....my Australian husband and I along with our 3 kids moved to oz because we were desperate to be with the family that we all missed very much (none in the uk), it didn't take us too long to realise that we missed the uk dreadfully and even the love of our Australian family couldn't make up for us wanting to be elsewhere. We moved back to the uk and haven't regretted it one bit. My point is if you love Australia as much as you seem to do I wonder if moving back for family is enough. Good luck to you, it's such a hard call.

[Croft]

It's a while since I've been on this site but saw this post and felt that I would offer my two penneth.....my Australian husband and I along with our 3 kids moved to oz because we were desperate to be with the family that we all missed very much (none in the uk), it didn't take us too long to realise that we missed the uk dreadfully and even the love of our Australian family couldn't make up for us wanting to be elsewhere. We moved back to the uk and haven't regretted it one bit. My point is if you love Australia as much as you seem to do I wonder if moving back for family is enough. Good luck to you, it's such a hard call.

 

 

Ooh, interesting post. So often it's the family ties which take people back but in your case it's the reverse.

[Scousers1]

Hi Scousers1, in answer as to why my family moved back, well it started with my brother. I don't really think he settled and had always struggled financially. Now that he is back he has thrived and so has his Australian born wife and daughters. Only last week they were taking a mini break in Europe and that would have been impossible before. I have to give credit to his wife because she'd never been overseas and it could easily have gone pear shaped. I think this made my parents re-assess where they wanted to be and how they wanted to spend old age. The heat was getting to them as it does the ill and the old, and then there's their brothers and sisters. I've said so many times in the past that Australia's wonderful, I'd never go back and I think that's probably because I didn't have a choice, but now I have. My youngest is about to turn 20 and I've given him a ticket back to the UK for a holiday in June so that he can explore and stay with his rellies. I will miss him but I know he will visit and maybe when he leaves university he will find a job in Europe. I don't know when it's the right time to stretch the ties with children. If I felt he really needed me I'd stay. Regarding your daughter, could you book a trip back with her and give her a taste of Europe and family?

I grew up in Crosby, just north of the city. I've assumed you are from Liverpool too, can I ask where?

sorry it's took a while to get back to you just had a real downer of a week. My parents would give anything to go back but are way too frail and I feel so guilty that they came because of me. That's fantastic for your brother really pleased for him. My daughter has spent her life dreading us going b ack so is dead against holidays over there or anything. Mum is from the Dinle, I grew up in Wallasey. I feel like I am going to have to make a really hard decision this year and it's awful. I can see me leaving my daughter and husband her and me going because I think I have pushed for too long to stay and it is now taking its toll on me. Sorry to be so miserable today.

[Antipodista]

sorry it's took a while to get back to you just had a real downer of a week. My parents would give anything to go back but are way too frail and I feel so guilty that they came because of me. That's fantastic for your brother really pleased for him. My daughter has spent her life dreading us going b ack so is dead against holidays over there or anything. Mum is from the Dinle, I grew up in Wallasey. I feel like I am going to have to make a really hard decision this year and it's awful. I can see me leaving my daughter and husband her and me going because I think I have pushed for too long to stay and it is now taking its toll on me. Sorry to be so miserable today.

 

 

Sorry to to hear that scousers. I'm from the Wirral too. Over in the U.K. at the moment and will have to return to Aus soon, dreading it. Seriously hope it works out well for you

[Wa7]

Been here in SA for 5 years & had 2 kids here. Went home in October & we both had that moment of why are we in oz &all our family in uk (lpool) ? So we're waiting to sell up &move while kids are little & my parents etc still in good health. Just don't see us aging here ..... want to go home

 

 

You have give it a go and that's all you can do ( head in sand won't fix anything ) Make sure you have citizenship before you go.

 

Best of luck to you and others in a similar situation.

[pixieontherocks]

I suppose it depends on when and where you were in SYD, we were lucky to experience the millennium in London, then SYD and grew our family for 10 years in SYD from early 2000 to 2011 with a very high quality of life (park water shore and 15 min bike or 20 min ferry ride to city), back then it was actually is a pretty cool place to work and for kids to grow up and we did one and a thousand things together, from travelling all over OZ by light plane to just well.......fun life with kids..in an inner city kind of oasis. I don't think that's possible now without a few million and to be honest, I don't think the community is there anymore.

 

Moved to Ad-dull-ade in 2012 for family... place is a disgrace compared to well, most other places........ now in East Sussex which we love and is beautiful, Adelaide is a special insidious place, which in retrospect I'm glad we did not like it there as to become accepting and accustomed to such mediocrity would be a very unfair mantle to my children.

 

Kids love it here, well integrated into schools, seasons are what you make of it, they built a snow man last week, been all over europe and then some in the last two years, little sponges..

 

But, to confirm you are right, Adelaide does indeed take the biscuit..

 

Where are you in E Sussex, Deryans? I'm moving there in June and need some ideas.