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Antipodista

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About Antipodista

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  1. Antipodista

    How to make the decision to stay or go

    Hi OP, I was the same as you, never really really “settled” before baby but thought Aus was ok and worth it to be with hubby. After baby number 1, mother in UK with breast cancer (thankfully fully recovered) and father with kidney cancer (sadly passed) the pull home became unbearable and when the time came to get back on the plane to Aus I couldn’t do it. It was awful and led to the breakdown of my relationship but in my experience those nagging feelings are nagging for a reason, don’t ignore them. If your husband wants to return too I wouldn’t wait. You could always rent your Aus place out? In 4 years who knows what your situation will be...don’t wait. 4 years is a long time to want to be somewhere else. feel free to PM me of you want.Best of luck xx
  2. Antipodista

    Capital gains

    Hoping someone can give a pointer...we are UK and Aus dual citizens, selling our Aus property (which we lived in for a short time then rented out when we came to UK). I know we will have to pay capital gains in UK for which we will get residence reliefs, but will we also have to pay capital gains in Aus? Anyone have an idea? I need to get specialist advice I know but just thought I’d see if anyone here had done the same. cheers
  3. Antipodista

    Moved back and confused!

    I’m in absolutely the same position as you, scarily similar, and my husband and I are in the process of separating over it. It’s so awful and I offer my sympathy. Im not saying that will happen, but it’s such a tough scenario where someone will always be losing out. I often get hit with the “Australia is a better and healthier life for children, you are denying our kids a better life and childhood because of your selfishness” which is a hard one to take.
  4. Antipodista

    Wanting to move back to Australia

    Constant UK bashing
  5. Antipodista

    Moving To Cheshire

    Yep I’m here and happy to meet up!! I love it here but on the whole it’s a lovely area. Photos attached from our walk up Helsby Hill today!!
  6. Antipodista

    Any help....I’m totally stuck !!

    Always one of the voices of reason on here!!
  7. Antipodista

    Almost There

    Thinking of you Quoll xx
  8. Antipodista

    Returning to UK

    Nope. No feeling like being home
  9. Antipodista

    Any help....I’m totally stuck !!

    If I’m doubt, don’t. Take a lovely holiday there every year. It’s not a panacea for everything and has its own struggles too.
  10. Antipodista

    Merseyside area

    My cousin lives in Crosby, it’s ace, lots going on. The Wirral (where I grew up) is still lovely, we have friends there so we are there all the time. Heswall is really nice but property there is v expensive.
  11. With respect, that is both unhelpful and unkind to the OP. I don’t think at any point she was asking for marriage guidance. And isn’t it true that the best advice comes from those with experience of your situation? I doubt the OP has reams of mates with experience of having emigrated in a difficult marriage. Geez.
  12. Hi Sarah I don’t wish to be dramatic but if you are having wobbles and your husband has made it clear that once you are there he is staying put - And you have children - DO NOT GO unless and until you are sure OR until you are confident that you will be able to live somewhere for the rest of your days that you aren’t truly happy. To do that your relationship will have to be absolutely rock-solid and it sounds like it isn’t . I am speaking from bitter experience. Sorry to sound dramatic but I wish someone had said it to me!! xx
  13. Antipodista

    Scotland or Melbourne?

    Hi there...my feelings changed so dramatically after I had my first child my husband couldn’t understand it. The homesickness became so difficult and emotional and I felt such a nagging loneliness. It also felt odd to me bringing my child up in a childhood and place so different from my own. That being said, I always assumed that it was “grass is greener” syndrome and that I’d magically recognise how much better Aus was once is been back in the UK for more than a few months and the shine had worn off! That unfortunately didn’t happen and it became apparent that the UK was where I feel I belong and life for me and the children is, for now, best and easiest. A trip back for you is crucial and I would make it as long as you can. Do an “act as if” you are living back - try to get an air bnb instead of staying with relatives, look at jobs, try to stay long enough that you are less of a novelty to friends and family, visit some schools etc etc, then assess from there. As someone who’s been there and is still going through it, feel free to DM. And my help for homesickness is to pop your favourite UK comedy show on Netflix and binge-watch xx
  14. Antipodista

    Scotland or Melbourne?

    Hi there...my feelings changed so dramatically after I had my first child my husband couldn’t understand it. The homesickness became so difficult and emotional and I felt such a nagging loneliness. It also felt odd to me bringing my child up in a childhood and place so different from my own. That being said, I always assumed that it was “grass is greener” syndrome and that I’d magically recognise how much better Aus was once is been back in the UK for more than a few months and the shine had worn off! That unfortunately didn’t happen and it became apparent that the UK was where I feel I belong and life for me and the children is, for now, best and easiest. A trip back for you is crucial and I would make it as long as you can. Do an “act as if” you are living back - try to get an air bnb instead of staying with relatives, look at jobs, try to stay long enough that you are less of a novelty to friends and family, visit some schools etc etc, then assess from there. As someone who’s been there and is still going through it, feel free to DM. And my help for homesickness is to pop your favourite UK comedy show on Netflix and binge-watch xx
  15. Antipodista

    Wanting to move back to Australia

    My gosh. How do you feel about that?
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