Poms Going Home to UK (register)

[fantasia]

Where did you move to..?

[Guest courtney1997]

Perth and loving it ...see my thred 1year in oz

[Skani]

dont get me wrong some kids over here do great things like one student at the local high school who went to OXFORD yes OXFORD UNI UK and that says something about the UK education.

 

 

It probably says more about Rhodes Scholarships. Students from every Australian state have been going to Oxford every year since 1904 because they are awarded Rhodes Scholarships - a bequest in the will of Cecil Rhodes - to go there. Currently, 11 are awarded each year to Australian students to go to Oxford.

[Guest Guest37175]

Probably me then LOL. What a joke. I dont subscribe to the rose tint brigade, never have. :biglaugh: It is just another bloody place to live your life in. Nothing magical about it - it is just another first world country with all a first world country's problems and benefits. A long plane flight doesnt confer beauty on the not so beautiful, intelligence on the not so bright, wealth on the poor, it is just another place to pay the mortgage, put the garbage out, visit the supermarket, pick up the dog poop.

 

Wonder why people who are so obsessed about moving here are so defensive about any possible negative view point - ah yes, cognitive dissonance, that will do it every time.

 

Hi all, first post, but have been a regular observer for well over a year now and am a regular reader on MBTTUK. My circumstances are a little unusual compared to most. I moved over to the Gold Coast in late 2008 as my partner was unhappy in London and was desperate to return to Oz and spend time with family and friends. She's Australian.

 

Personally I never wanted to come. Found Oz a great place for a holiday but nothing more than that and I was very happy with our life in London but I knew she wasn't and it was a question of "doing Australia" in order to try and keep our family together.

 

I struggled immediately. Swapping life in Greater London and working in town for the dreamy quiet of the GC was too much. What's more, I couldn't deal with the heat and humidity and the isolation from family and friends back in the UK.

 

Christmas 2008 was tough and the blistering sun and relentless humidity of January really messed me up. I'd always worked, but like most ex-pats struggled to get something when I arrived here. Even though I eventually found work my mental health disintegrated and I succumbed to Depression and Anxiety. My worst moment was waking up one morning shaking and cradling a knife knowing that I wanted to harm myself but couldn't. I remember walking into my sleeping two year old daughter's room sobbing and just holding her hand whilst she slept and thinking "I've gotta get help."

 

My GP was great. Lovely bloke to talk to, he got me on meds and arranged counselling. Unfortunately the psychologist I saw didn't subscribe to CBT and was incredulous that I missed England. During sessions he mocked me for missing London and told me that I should visit Mount Tambourine in the GC hinterland and try some wine and cheese-tasting or just go home without my partner and child. I lasted three sessions and binned him.

 

I've been very fortunate to have a supportive partner who largely understood what I was going through and did her best to help. I have to say that I did not make this easy for her. I was vile in my views towards her country. I mocked it and rubbished it at every opportunity, my attitude born out of fear and resentment. For her, I know that there was desperate disappointment. For the last eighteen months of her time in the UK I know she was desperately unhappy and and so wanted to come home. And here was I, ruining it all for her.

 

I'm ashamed and embarrassed at some of the cruel things I said about the country and it's people and I am trying to take responsibility for that. It hasn't helped having to juggle the feelings of those back home and my partner's friends and family here. Back home folks are gob-smacked when I tell them that Oz is not nirvana but that's nothing compared to the attitude of australian friends here. Nearly all of them have lived in the UK at some stage, and all of them enjoyed the experience. But, when I told them that I was unhappy in Oz and wanted to return home it triggered varying responses. Usually it was shocked incredulity, followed by demeaning comments about the UK, but with some it started with attacks on the UK and just carried on.

 

These are well educated and well-travelled people but my admitting to not liking the life here has triggered real bitterness. I understand that a lot of this is about the joint decision that my partner and I have made to return to the UK in June and that they are losing a close friend once again to the UK, but their reactions have shocked me.

 

For years I worked in London alongside folk from all over the world and people came and left at will. When it happened we had a drink and farewelled them and accepted that this was part of the landscape. New friends came and went and there's always Facebook and email. To be honest, I'm staggered at why it upsets people so much that we are in my partner's words "turning our backs on Australia" but people do seem angry, disbelieving and resentful. I don't know why, they're all happy here!. But, my not being happy here seems to really pushed some buttons and I am completely at a loss to understand why!

 

Anyway, sorry for the long post, but just wanted to share with someone!

 

Many thanks

[Guest Guest31881]

Hi Ozsceptic,

 

That post must have taken a lot of courage to put that lot into words.

First of all you are not alone; there are plenty of members on here who have felt the same as you and its nothing to be ashamed of. In fact a few weeks ago we had a thread running about stress and depression felt by some who move here. Australia is not the perfect place for everyone and some people will not feel happy here, that’s not your fault, it is not Australia’s fault it's just a fact of life.

As for friends who cannot understand your reasons for moving back to the UK, you are probably better off without them if that is their attitude.

 

I have been here for 7 months and love it here, but that does not mean I have to stay here, in a few years I may feel that its my time to return to the UK and I could never condemn anyone who's post is honest and genuine and I wish you well for the future, good luck and enjoy the rest of your life in the UK.

[Quoll]

Hi Ozsceptic

 

What a heartfelt post, whilst I havent actually had the knife in hand, I have had thoughts of checking the sharpness of them I must admit! And for a normally sane and sensible person to go that far down the track of self harm is a very scary prospect, as you found!

 

I am angry on your behalf that the psych you got didnt work on ways to help you manage those depressing feelings and I would be advising your GP not to recommend him to anyone any more! That is beyond negligent. If he cant manage even the basics of CBT or ACT then he has no business reaping the medicare dollars for "helping" people with depression IMHO

 

It is so incredibly difficult with a mixed marriage - the chances are that one of you is not going to "belong" and I guess it then comes down to who can cope with the "not belongingness" the best if your relationship is going to last. I think many of us who end up in mixed marriages dont really consider the "living arrangements" in the throes of love!

 

I do hope that your partner is able to manage when you go move on to UK and that you can find a place that suits you both - you are at least going to be very sensitive to her feelings down the track as well!

 

Good luck with your move!

[Guest Guest37175]

Hi Ozsceptic,

 

That post must have taken a lot of courage to put that lot into words.

First of all you are not alone; there are plenty of members on here who have felt the same as you and its nothing to be ashamed of. In fact a few weeks ago we had a thread running about stress and depression felt by some who move here. Australia is not the perfect place for everyone and some people will not feel happy here, that’s not your fault, it is not Australia’s fault it's just a fact of life.

As for friends who cannot understand your reasons for moving back to the UK, you are probably better off without them if that is their attitude.

 

I have been here for 7 months and love it here, but that does not mean I have to stay here, in a few years I may feel that its my time to return to the UK and I could never condemn anyone who's post is honest and genuine and I wish you well for the future, good luck and enjoy the rest of your life in the UK.

 

 

Thanks SRP.

 

Yeah the responses we've received to letting people know we're heading back to the UK has made us made us think a bit about the worth of these friendships. Certainly I'm approaching the inevitable round of 'goodbye' drinks and barbies with some trepidation. I really don't want to have to sit through hours of snide comments about the UK. I know that I've dished out some unkind comments of my own during my time here but in truth these have generally been aired when only my partner is listening (or sticking her fingers in her ears!) and not at social gatherings. Oh well, maybe it's karma and I'll just have to take it on the chin!

[Guest Guest37175]

Hi Ozsceptic

 

What a heartfelt post, whilst I havent actually had the knife in hand, I have had thoughts of checking the sharpness of them I must admit! And for a normally sane and sensible person to go that far down the track of self harm is a very scary prospect, as you found!

 

I am angry on your behalf that the psych you got didnt work on ways to help you manage those depressing feelings and I would be advising your GP not to recommend him to anyone any more! That is beyond negligent. If he cant manage even the basics of CBT or ACT then he has no business reaping the medicare dollars for "helping" people with depression IMHO

 

It is so incredibly difficult with a mixed marriage - the chances are that one of you is not going to "belong" and I guess it then comes down to who can cope with the "not belongingness" the best if your relationship is going to last. I think many of us who end up in mixed marriages dont really consider the "living arrangements" in the throes of love!

 

I do hope that your partner is able to manage when you go move on to UK and that you can find a place that suits you both - you are at least going to be very sensitive to her feelings down the track as well!

 

Good luck with your move!

 

Thanks Quoll.

 

I do think it's a bit of a lottery in terms of what kind of service you get when you access Psych support through your GP. The bloke I saw told me that he was basically a criminal Psych who worked with offenders during the week and augmented his income with some Medicare clients at the weekend. He also told me that he'd worked for the NHS in London and hadn't enjoyed it and basically allowed his anti-UK prejudices free reign in the session.

 

It's always a bad sign when the therapist talks more than the patient and I could hardly get a word in edgeways!

 

I do feel a load better putting my experience to words. P.I.O. has been a godsend to me over the past fourteen months. I meet lots of British people on the Gold Coast but have never met anyone who ever said they were unhappy in Oz. When that happens, combined with unhelpful messages from friends and family members, you really do feel "It must be me, I'm some kind of freak!"

 

Reading threads right across P.I.O. has made me realise that I'm not alone in having struggled, and that plenty of others have done too. I really do feel for people who've staked so much in getting to Oz only for it to not work out as they hoped. In a sense I've been lucky in that I came out here with a great deal of trepidation (hence the username!) and pretty low expectations. It's spared me the disappointment that others have gone through, although by the same token it could be argued that if I'd been more positive from the onset then my family and I might have enjoyed it more.

 

I don't suppose I'll ever know the answer to that one.

 

I'm very fortunate that my partner likes the UK. She prefers Oz, and like many she feels it offers more opportunities to our daughter as she grows up, but she knows also that our daughter will benefit more from having two parents around her who are happy and whole (fingers crossed!) than blue skies and an outdoors life.

 

Thanks again.

[Guest pegasus 90]

Thanks SRP.

 

Yeah the responses we've received to letting people know we're heading back to the UK has made us made us think a bit about the worth of these friendships. Certainly I'm approaching the inevitable round of 'goodbye' drinks and barbies with some trepidation. I really don't want to have to sit through hours of snide comments about the UK. I know that I've dished out some unkind comments of my own during my time here but in truth these have generally been aired when only my partner is listening (or sticking her fingers in her ears!) and not at social gatherings. Oh well, maybe it's karma and I'll just have to take it on the chin!

Ozsceptic,

I read your post with great interest. We have been here nearly 10 years this year; my parents & older brother emigrated out here 3-4 yrs ago and love Oz. We have announced we are going back this year and been shocked at the reaction from family & friends. Sniggers, derision, slagging off & plain old anger from some people!!. I can't believe we are being treated this way; what is it about leaving Oz that they can't take?. It has made some folk speak really out of character. I can't work it out; we've never slagged the place off and have been very successful: professionally & financially in Australia - we're just bored of the place really.

[Guest Aldo]

I does seem odd the reactions from folk. An aussie couple who we where (are) good friends with where quite upset when we told them we where going home but did'nt get bitter and defencive but instead made us up photo albums of our times together there and gave us aussie souvenirs and are even visiting us here in the summer with their grown up kids following later. The ugly side of the story was when she told her brothers we where going and they looked at me like sh7t, like i'd really insulted them.

I really have a problem understanding this:nah:

[Guest Stokey]

Well what more is there to say on the reactions side? We have not yet told our family in Oz that we are returning to the UK within 2 months all being well, but i know that we will get bad reactions from both the Full Aussies and the £10 poms, i think it maybe worse from my £10 pom aunty who hates the UK that much she goes there 1 in 5 yrs? My Aunty says the UK is ****, but I think deep down my Aunty says these things because she would love to return and cannot admit this. I think Oz is a great holiday location but not a place to live (for us anyway), on the other hand will i return here mmmmm NO, I have seen enough (4trips out) and lived here so its time to live where i love and thats home and visit other countrys which to be honest will be cheaper to do from the UK.

 

I always wish everyone the best in there choices, and everyone like us who is returning home must remember this: Its better to have tried than not tried and wondered!

[Guest bernie]

Well my last posts on here were early last year, since then we have been to the sunshine coast and back again. As we received our visa (perm skilled 175) after a long time of planning and decisions, the recession hit. We couldn't sell our house at the time, so decided to rent it out. All was set and we finally arrived in March. We did not have work lined up since hubby is an electrician and so was hopeing to find work when we arrived. We only spent six months there and after this time he couldn't find any work! We felt we were not welcome in Queensland and got the impression we were taking Aussie jobs. We had such a great time but had to make the decision to come back, since we could not claim benefits etc for two years. Its been such a hard decision, although we have slipped back into our live,s I am personally struggling. I had dreamed about going for 5 years, but my hubby says he will never go back! He feels ripped off by the Aus Gov. who claim they need all these trades etc and make you go through hell to get your liscences. We loved it there but is there anyone that has ever gone back? I don't know if we could all go through with it again, but right now, I am really missing it.

 

It's hard to have a dream and then have to give up that lifestyle , and get your head around all the things that you hoped would change in your life.

[caramac]

I does seem odd the reactions from folk. An aussie couple who we where (are) good friends with where quite upset when we told them we where going home but did'nt get bitter and defencive but instead made us up photo albums of our times together there and gave us aussie souvenirs and are even visiting us here in the summer with their grown up kids following later. The ugly side of the story was when she told her brothers we where going and they looked at me like sh7t, like i'd really insulted them.

I really have a problem understanding this:nah:

 

I only had negative comments from some British friends (who live in Australia), a lot of my Aussie friends were quite envious. One said, 'You are so lucky to be able to live somewhere where there is so much going on and accessible to everywhere, I'd love to give my children that kind of upbringing, they'd be so much more broadminded'. She is an Aussie who has travelled a lot, maybe that's the difference? Or maybe we all want what we don't have??

[Mongrel]

Well my last posts on here were early last year, since then we have been to the sunshine coast and back again. As we received our visa (perm skilled 175) after a long time of planning and decisions, the recession hit. We couldn't sell our house at the time, so decided to rent it out. All was set and we finally arrived in March. We did not have work lined up since hubby is an electrician and so was hopeing to find work when we arrived. We only spent six months there and after this time he couldn't find any work! We felt we were not welcome in Queensland and got the impression we were taking Aussie jobs. We had such a great time but had to make the decision to come back, since we could not claim benefits etc for two years. Its been such a hard decision, although we have slipped back into our live,s I am personally struggling. I had dreamed about going for 5 years, but my hubby says he will never go back! He feels ripped off by the Aus Gov. who claim they need all these trades etc and make you go through hell to get your liscences. We loved it there but is there anyone that has ever gone back? I don't know if we could all go through with it again, but right now, I am really missing it.

 

It's hard to have a dream and then have to give up that lifestyle , and get your head around all the things that you hoped would change in your life.

 

There is no dream unless you are cashed up and can afford not to work , takin their jobs is ****, you have to get your head down and struggle , travel to work , if ther aint none look further afield , nice partying but you have to go and get what you can , I have a poxy job in a warehouse ,travel 65 kms and 65 back for 600 bucks a week but its a job. All this dream **** does my head in , DREAM sleep like activity , Aus is bloody hard and you have to do the **** to reap the benefit

[Guest jackie Macdonald]

Hi everyone, well i thought i would add a note to this, We moved here in Oct 2009 after waiting 12 months to sell up in the UK, please note we have spent along time making the choice to move here since 2003 and alot of trips over to ensure we picked the right state and area for us and what we wanted. BUT by christmas 2009 we knew we had made a huge mistake and Oz is not for us, the cost of living here is more expensive than the UK (oh we have 4 kids and are a family),

 

 

 

 

Hey! I'm not the only one who knew immediately that I had made a big mistake!! I only managed 4 months there. Been back in the UK now 6 months and very happy to be so!! I agree with you on the education side too. My 3 children are all settled back in good schools here and doing very well.

 

The very best of luck in your venture back home,

 

jxx

[Guest valleylass]

We have been in Queensland for 4 months now. After much deliberation we have decided to return to the UK. We originally came out here for a holiday in 2005 and loved it. When we got home we started to consider the move out here. We have family here who love the place. A couple of years ago a close friend of ours died of cancer at a young age, which in turn galvanised us to take the leap and emigrate.

 

Our kids were not too happy with the prospect as they had put down strong roots at home and in school. We originally opted for Melbourne, but the kids wanted to be close to their cousins and go to the same school as them. Seeing how we where dragging them out here it was the least we could do.

 

This basically tied us down to one area. the school we sent the kids to made some clunking mistakes in terms of our kids (I won't bore you with the details). In short the kids were not very happy. In the mean time we struggled to find work, which appears to be the norm. After Christmas we had made a considerable dent into our savings. We started to set up a contingency plan if things should fail. The problem in the UK had been our work set up, I am a freelancer so my income was very unstable, after the recession it was practically non existent. So as part of the plan i decided I would retrain to become a primary school teacher, which i had talked about on many occasions.

 

As the weeks went on the contingency plan seemed more viable. the kids remained unhappy and the option of moving them out of school and into a new area was something our finances couldn't stretch to. So we decided if we're going to move them, then it's back to the UK to schools they both know and thrived in. We talked it over with the kids and they were over the moon, the happiest we've seen them in 12 months!

 

Sadly our family over here reacted in a similar manner to most people mentioned in these posts. My partner has copped for the blame as she is perceived by her family over here to be the driving force behind most decisions. Even though I have said the whole thing is my idea! We have been told that we don't know what we're talking about, we should suck it up etc. All well and good, but our decision is entirely practical and at this stage in our lives we are more than capable of thinking things through.

 

I understand the disappointment and hurt they must feel (we felt it when they originally left the UK) but enough is enough now. I feel the relationship we have with them is wearing thin as a consequence ,which is a shame.

 

Australia is an amazing country, and we have enjoyed our time here. However we have felt for sometime that this place isn't right for us, or we're not right for it. I can only assume that our decision to leave so early has possibly reopened some old wounds for my partners family. They keep saying how hard they had it for the first few years etc. I fully understand and respect that. But I feel that we have put our kids through enough, and to get them back on track we need to move back as quickly as possible so they can get on with their lives.

 

My best wishes to all the other people going through this same experience ,hope this post helps someone, I know a lot of these posts have helped us.

 

Cheers

Mr. Valleylass.

[Quoll]

Good luck with your move Mr and Mrs Valleylass! I think there is a good deal of cognitive dissonance going on for some people unfortunately - some of them, deep down, are jealous that you have the gumption to up and do what you want to do. In some ways it says to them - gee, you made a bum decision!!! I hope it all works out for you!

[Guest meme]

:nah:I get really worried reading some of these threads.

 

To be honest, I have not been on here for a while. I am all for having different points of view and people having their own opinions, but, there are people that are desperate to make a better/different and new life for themselves in Australia and have yet to experience this way of life. It has took me over a year to get my visa and I am one of the lucky ones, others may never get the opportunity and some may take years. I have friends that have been trying for years and still no joy. Therefore, I think constructive advice etc is fine but to frighten people with the decision they have made is not fair. As I have said everyone is entitled to their opinion, some people will stay and make a go of it and others will want to go home for whatever reason. If you are one of the people that has gone home, surely more research and time over there before making the leap would have been better?? If it was other reasons then they would be helpful for the unknowns to know but to just slag somewhere off without a good explanation is not fair on those who want to swap places with the opportunities that you have been given. If getting there and finding out it was not for you then that is fine and you are allowed to come back and no doubt pick up just where you left off, (it is no big deal!) I however whilst working really hard to try and get visas and others on here who are making it their lifes goal to get over to Oz and still have the reasons/memories at the forefront of their mind of why they are going and may never get there, do not appreciate the really negative and unhelpful things that are said on here.

 

Be happy to have been lucky enough to have had this wonderful experience, ok if it did not work move on and make a happy life wherever but try not to taint other peoples dreams, and good luck to those who are still trying.

 

Clare

 

Lets just hope our post doesn't come back to bite you on the bum one day!!.....

[Guest meme]

Sorry, i ment 'your' post..(thinking faster than i can type!)

[TaniaColin]

Hi everyone, well i thought i would add a note to this, We moved here in Oct 2009 after waiting 12 months to sell up in the UK, please note we have spent along time making the choice to move here since 2003 and alot of trips over to ensure we picked the right state and area for us and what we wanted. BUT by christmas 2009 we knew we had made a huge mistake and Oz is not for us, the cost of living here is more expensive than the UK (oh we have 4 kids and are a family), I have dealt with every realestate agent in my area and to say the least they were well **** at helping us to gain a rental before we bought anything, we lodged for properties and got NO replys (HOW RUDE) its better to have a response regardless of the outcome. We have always been welcomed with open arms on every vist BUT this time was different when people in those same areas knew we were here to live! To say the least we were ignored/whispered about infront of our own faces, whilst there will be very nice Australians there are also BAD ones as with any country and i think we found alot of bad ones that hate poms, please dont say its the area we live in because hey we checked the area out on 4 visits over here. I think its hard for some familys over here like us who want the best for our kids and i can honestly say MY kids will get better options and education in the UK they are not beach bums which is whats on offer over here, dont get me wrong some kids over here do great things like one student at the local high school who went to OXFORD yes OXFORD UNI UK and that says something about the UK education.

 

I know that people will look at this and moan like i dont know what about the fact that we dont like Australia well its we dont like LIVING HERE!

 

So yes we are going back to the UK and our home town STOKE yes stoke-on-trent, it may not be the richest city but hey the people in my home city are amongst the best in the world as they speak to each other whether they have no money or loads and that makes a great place as we are not snobs we dont look at people and say hay im not speaking to you cus you have no money, we have friends who having nothing and you know what they are our best friends over here does not seem like that to us and we yes we get the feeling that Aussies just dont like the poms coming over, well hey we founded this country so get over it!

 

Hi i can totally relate to what you are saying we have been here since the end of july 09 and it has really hit me i still have my good days and bad days. For me personally my children did more back in england, the schools were better, there was always something going on at school either with discos, after school clubs. The kids played out more, went to more parties more sleepovers the list is endless, all what they do now is stay in the house. They aren't into sport my 2 eldest are 9 and 12 boys, my daughter who is 5 has to do prep all over again, when she had already done 12 months in reception in england, and my 3 year old will be stuck at nursery for the next 2 years. I am restricted now for what hours i can work, hard not having family or friends around who can help out with the kids.

My nine year old is returning to the uk in the next month, he doesn't like it out here, so my parents are going to look after him until we make a decision on what we are going to do. I don't want him unhappy out here any longer, he misses grandparents and his old school to much. For us personally we are lucky that i have someone to look after him, as it does have an effect on kids when they get older, i want him to be happy and out here he isn't.

So we might be returning back to stoke (newcastle-u-lyme) in the near future, i think australia is a nice place, some nice people but personally i don't think it will ever be home to us.

Tania x

[Guest Guest37175]

Ozsceptic,

I read your post with great interest. We have been here nearly 10 years this year; my parents & older brother emigrated out here 3-4 yrs ago and love Oz. We have announced we are going back this year and been shocked at the reaction from family & friends. Sniggers, derision, slagging off & plain old anger from some people!!. I can't believe we are being treated this way; what is it about leaving Oz that they can't take?. It has made some folk speak really out of character. I can't work it out; we've never slagged the place off and have been very successful: professionally & financially in Australia - we're just bored of the place really.

 

Hi Pegasus,

 

I wish I could answer that for you. When we announced in 2008 that we were moving to Oz folks back home were disappointed but not surprised. They were generally positive about the life we were about to embark upon and I never heard a bad word about Oz from them.

 

Two years later and the picture is very different. I'm now avoiding my partner's friends and family and she has been pushed into the role of 'defending' the UK from them. She's not thrilled I can tell you!

 

To try and put my personal problems into some context I explained to a group of Aussie friends that as an englishman who loved London I was a square peg in a round hole in Australia. I explained that I had been happy at home, was not adventurous, didn't like hot weather, never did beach holidays and was generally not an outdoors person in any way and was, in my partner's words "A waste of a visa."

 

The immediate response I received was "Let me take you camping in the bush that'll sort out your homesickness."

 

I remember laughing nervously and then looking up and seeing all these faces around the table looking at me expectantly. It wasn't a joke!. He really meant it and it made perfect sense to them!.

 

It was a bit like a scene in a movie. I thought they were gonna start chanting and lighting candles!. I had to leg it to the loo!

 

My partner who is Australian feels that us returning to the UK strikes hard at her friends feelings of pride. They love their country and expect others to love it too. None of them have encountered British people who aren't happy in Oz so they're conditioned to expect very positive responses about the place.

 

In private with my partner I have made some unkind comments about Oz. They were prompted by fear and alienation and I bitterly regret them now and I'm sure she shared some of those conversations with friends - she'd be a saint if she didn't. However, I've never been critical of Oz to our Australian friends. When I mentioned this to her she said "Yeah, but you express no enthusiasm or real interest in the place. You're polite enough but people can see through that and they want to know why you don't like the place as much as they do."

 

That's a no-win situation. If my partner's friends are thin-skinned about how their country is experienced by outsiders then that has nothing to do with me. It's their issue not mine. Same goes for family over here who love it. Great, if it works for you, but it can never work for everyone. I think the stats bear that out. I've read on P.I.O. that roughly 23,000 Brits move over every year and roughly 3000 move back. Apologies if those figures are wrong but I think it shows that there is, and probably always will be a proportions of Poms in Oz for whom it can never work despite everyone's best efforts.

 

Best of luck with the move back. I'm sure you'll take a huge amount of positives home with you after a decade away and you'll be greeted by many more when you return home.

[Guest Stokey]

So we might be returning back to stoke (newcastle-u-lyme) in the near future, i think australia is a nice place, some nice people but personally i don't think it will ever be home to us.

Tania x

 

 

Hi guys, you may not remember but we met at the meet along time ago just off the M1, my god it took us all so long to get here! For us its a case this place no longer feels like home, every other visit we did prior to moving here it felt like home but once here it does not and seeing the schools holes makes me think my kids are better back in the UK, we should be back within 3 weeks and cant wait, just wish we had rented our house out in the UK but hey we didnt for a reason god knows why yet other than we know where we need to be. This is a great holiday place but i know i will never return its time to see the world. Oh its cheaper to do in the UK, i suppose its easy for us to return as i walk back into my old company with a fresh challenge upon return but hey i woud rather search for work in the UK than here, Too many people dont want us brits here now so good let them build it themselves, because they dont want to pay skilled brits good money here, i should know ive been dealing with companys here putting people into work both brits and Aussies.

 

Oh cant wait to go to the Brit on a saturday and then a English PUB with the family for tea and a proper beer not the half measures here.

[Guest valleylass]

Hi i can totally relate to what you are saying we have been here since the end of july 09 and it has really hit me i still have my good days and bad days. For me personally my children did more back in england, the schools were better, there was always something going on at school either with discos, after school clubs. The kids played out more, went to more parties more sleepovers the list is endless, all what they do now is stay in the house. They aren't into sport my 2 eldest are 9 and 12 boys, my daughter who is 5 has to do prep all over again, when she had already done 12 months in reception in england, and my 3 year old will be stuck at nursery for the next 2 years. I am restricted now for what hours i can work, hard not having family or friends around who can help out with the kids.

My nine year old is returning to the uk in the next month, he doesn't like it out here, so my parents are going to look after him until we make a decision on what we are going to do. I don't want him unhappy out here any longer, he misses grandparents and his old school to much. For us personally we are lucky that i have someone to look after him, as it does have an effect on kids when they get older, i want him to be happy and out here he isn't.

So we might be returning back to stoke (newcastle-u-lyme) in the near future, i think australia is a nice place, some nice people but personally i don't think it will ever be home to us.

Tania x

 

Hi Tania

This must have been a tough decision to make about your 9 year old and best wishes to him on his return to the UK. How lovely that he has such a strong relationship with his grandparents that he can do this. Good luck with your choice to go or stay. Whatever you decide I hope it works out well for all of you.

valleylass

[Guest valleylass]

Good luck with your move Mr and Mrs Valleylass! I think there is a good deal of cognitive dissonance going on for some people unfortunately - some of them, deep down, are jealous that you have the gumption to up and do what you want to do. In some ways it says to them - gee, you made a bum decision!!! I hope it all works out for you!

 

Quoll

 

As ever your spirited responses keep me entertained. There are times when the chips have been down that I've logged on to check you are still telling it like it is, and you have never disappointed many, many thanks.

I am due to fly home tomorrow with the prospect of a great job interview next week. Whilst I take full responsibility for our choice to come out here it has still helped enormously to find like minded people on PIO. We never expected to live the Oz dream as this is a utopian ideal and as such impossible for any country to live up to; however we didn't anticipate having to make such huge compromises across the board (ignorance or a lack of research on our part perhaps). As my husband wrote earlier on this register we have found a solution to our particular set of problems in the UK, we are not rejecting Australia but have lost our focus and consequently desire to continue struggling to make it work.

 

There are plenty of people out there who are in far worse situations than ours and to you I wish you the best of luck, for all others struggling to make sense of emigration out here we know we've jumped early and that puts us at greater risk of 'ping-ponging'.

 

Sometimes, just sometimes a decision feels absolutely right and this does for us. Kids and hubby arrive in the UK on Valentine's Day. If it helps at all we will keep you posted on our return to the UK.

 

My very best wishes to all PIOers

 

valleylass xx

[ezzie]

Only 3,000 return each year...I thought it'd be more. Anyone have recent figures on this?

 

 

Hi Pegasus,

 

I've read on P.I.O. that roughly 23,000 Brits move over every year and roughly 3000 move back. Apologies if those figures are wrong but I think it shows that there is, and probably always will be a proportions of Poms in Oz for whom it can never work despite everyone's best efforts.

 

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