Aussie Hopeful Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Let me pre-empt this post by saying this is an open and honest reflection of MY opinion, experience and feelings throughout this journey and I have made this post to try and give a balanced view of Australia and all that migration offers. We started our journey back in Jan 2012. Whilst we had a great life and great friends in the UK and were really settled where we were, we had heard so many people tell us they had the chance to move to Oz and didn't and had regretted it ever since and we didn't want to be another 'could have gone'. So we applied form our PR and had it within 6 months. We sold everything and landed in Perth in August that year. The idea of leaving was much easier than the reality of taking your child away from their grandparents and the devastation it causes and not to mention the grief you feel when you walk through the airport departures leaving your family and close friends behind. Nonetheless, it was exciting and we landed in Perth with 5 suitcases, no jobs and a small amount of money to live off (oh and the most hurrendous jetlag). I was fortunate that I had an interview lined up 2 days after landing and for the job. Fast forward 6 months and Perth wasn't living up to what we had hoped. Unquestionably, the beaches were incredible. There was nothing better than taking a walk along the beach each evening and having a swim when the temperatures were sweltering. Kings park was just spectacular and we just loved spending afternoons there. What a view! The Perth spring was just amazing. Perfect temperatures! But that was where the positives stopped for us. We found it soul less, backwards and boring. The temperature in summer was unbearable and it was impossible to enjoy the outdoor lifestyle we craved. The flies...oh the flies!!!! My staple diet for 6 months of the year was flies and not through choice, but simply because so many seemed to find their way into my digestive system either through my mouth when I took a breath or through my nostrils. Then there were the bogans. Not just any bogans, but cashed up bogans in their bloody UTE's. Uneducated morons earning a fortune doing FIFO. The bogan situation would not have been so bad, but it was compounded by the influx of chavs who had made their way to the promised land. Whilst I loved my job and it was well paid, I was shocked at the work culture and work shy Australians. I couldn't believe how slap dash everything was and considering I worked with migrants, I couldn't believe how openly racist the Australians were. Was this really the forward thinking advanced country I had read about in the glossy magazine's and had witnessed Nicki Chapman lay on a plate in front of me whilst I drooled over the possibilities that Oz had to offer? It wouldn't have been so bad but I was paying a small fortune for the privilege. I didn't mind paying a million pounds for a pint of beer but what annoyed me most was the fact that the customer service was absolutely disgusting (example: I sat outside of Dome one sunny day enjoying a nice chilled drink when the couple next to us complained to the waiter that they had had their muffin but not yet had their coffee. At this point the manager came out with their receipt and pointed out that they had only been waiting less than 15 minutes (fair point!). However, the customer pointed out that she didn't mind that but would have liked to have enjoyed her muffin and coffee together while they were still hot. At this point he turned to her and said, "what do you think we are? Fine Dining?" What an arrogant n@b I thought. Considering he was ripping her off the least he could do is give her it at the same time. they got up and walked). For me this tipified the Perth mentality of, "well its Perth, what do you expect," or "well where else are you going to go?" That was just it, there wasn't an alternative! I found Perth to be constantly chasing the dollar with a huge focus on money and nothing else. It was bland and brown everywhere! My wife grew desperately unhappy and isolated in the local community. People were incredibly clique and unfriendly. We started dreaming of the green pastures of the lakes, the reasonably priced supermarkets and our friends and family. Christmas was desperately unhappy time and not to mention stinking hot. So 8 months in I started applying for jobs in the uk and nothing happened. It was frustrating. then a breakthrough, my boss sent me to Melbourne for a conference and suggested I take the family. Well, she regretted that as within 2 months I landed a job in Melbourne and we were off. Our 12 month nightmare and battle with flies was coming to an end! Melbourne was a different kettle of fish. Great culture, loads to do and just great people. We loved it. My job was great, we loved the suburb only a short walk from the bay and we were starting to feel settled. We established some good friends and all was well. Now don't get me wrong, it wasn't all perfect, beaches were disappointing after Perth and aspects of Aussie culture were a huge turn off but it was like a different country to Perth. Oh and the weather was mental and there were still some flies, but not at the Biblical proportions witnessed in Perth. Anyway, we were getting settled so decided to have another child. Within a couple of months my wife had conceived and we would soon be welcoming a little Aussie child. However, a few months later, my wife experienced a death of a close family member and could not make it home. It was devastating and the distance really hit home. Did we really want to be so far from friends and family and raise a child in such isolated circumstances. We agonised over the decision, but ultimately we decided to leave. 12 Months after arriving in melbourne, we would be gone. As we looked forward to seeing all those people who encouraged us to come back, we remembered the things in Oz that we just couldn't stand. We shipped out 6 weeks after our child was born. It was insane and not something I would recommend to anyone who is of sound mind! On our last day in Melbourne we walked around the botanical gardens and looked up into a clear blue sky as a hot air balloon flew over. I couldn't believe we were actually leaving this place. But, no, remember the crap here and all the wonderful things that await you in good old blighty. So we landed back on British soil in 2014 (just over 2 years after leaving for Oz) and we have now been back for 9 months. I landed a dream job while I was still in Oz and we relocated somewhere new. Right on the coast within a 5 minute walk to the sea. Its stunning, the people are unbelievably friendly, the scenery is amazing and life is very very comfortable. Whilst the family are a few hours away, we still see them regularly and friends are even closer. Our son has an amazing school..... But......... You just can't get rid of that nagging..... Once you have made the move it changes you. Once you have experienced something different, you can't just settle. Could we stay put and be happy, yes. Could we thrive in careers, yes. But as far as lifestyle goes, there is no comparison. Guaranteed good weather, great outdoor lifestyle and just the pure quality family time that life in Oz affords. Whilst we like where we are, the weather is a major factor in restricting your enjoyment of the outdoors. Its cold, wet and windy (and thats the summer). The family and friends is a big one, but the red carpet treatment lasts a day and once you are back you are back and ironically, I speak less to friends now than when I was in Oz and we've had less visitors. Its a huge disappointment and a huge eye opener. Have we had rose tinted glasses throughout our journey? Yes probably. The reality is that both places have pro's and con's and the way I see it, it comes down to a choice between lifestyle and family and friends, but on returning to the UK, our view on this has changed considerably with expectations just not met. The reality is that the grass is not greener anywhere, its just different grass. Different people look for different things in life and that should ultimately determine where you choose to live. Having been there and back and reflected on every aspect of life in the UK and Australia, we just can't get away from the fact that the Australian lifestyle (warts and all) is what we want for us as a family and more importantly for our children. For that reason we will be ping ponging back to Melbourne within the next 2 years. My advice to anyone making the move either way. Be open minded and don't make quick emotional decisions. Its a hard hard slog when you move to another country, but its an incredible and life changing adventure, wherever you end up settling. It demands character and strength you never knew you had, but at the end you will never be the same. But regardless of all the challenges and heart ache, its worth it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wooba Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Interesting read.. for what it's worth, I've not been to Perth to experience the flies.. but I had no issues with flies in Sydney or Cairns when I visited. However, in Melbourne I was under constant attack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MARYROSE02 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I went back to England for twelve years, but I'm an Aussie citizen so did not have any worries about getting into Australia again. I recommend anybody thinking of going back to the UK to wait until they are Aussie citizens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PatW Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Well done. Very honest & articulate about pros & cons. Not easy to move country so far from England (can't just 'pop back'). I do wish you the best for wherever you live. Pat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Dave53 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 What a brilliant read .. I agree 100 % with all your perceptions , and your experiences certainly reflect my own . After almost 28 years here in Australia , and having returned probably 15 times to Britain on holiday I'm still not settled , occasionally very homesick , and certainly not sure if I will finish up my days here ... You are right , that " grass is always greener " idea is merely fanciful , in reality it's just a different shade , and often duller .. I've been contributing here for a few years , how refreshing that people like you can now make posts that give the full picture without being castigated for your efforts ,something that I was in the past .... I say , " take off your rose coloured specs , throw away the blinkers and see the situation for what it really is " ... There are plus's and minus's in all situations , it's about making a measured decision .... Thanks for your post .. Dave C Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JockinTas Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 A very good post! Australia is indeed a huge and isolated country and each city is so very different. Hope you manage to settle wherever you will be happy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Que Sera Sera Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 It's funny how someone's experience can be so different from another's, just goes to show you how different our lives can be. A very interesting read all the same, thank you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerryDXB Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Could've been me writing all that..with the exception of going to Melbourne...I was there from June 2010 to August 2012. In June 2012 I was in two minds as to whether to stay or leave, it would have been easy to stay - great money, but the entire Aussie work culture was grinding me down. I could have changed jobs..plenty of opportunities in Oz at that time (many fewer now) and stayed, but I was a little concerned that it might have been 'out of the fire..' so to speak. My decision was made when I got a phone call out of the blue, asking if I'd be interested in a job back in the UK..so back I went and its been great. Fabulous job (28 days on/28 days off - so lots of time to travel) much more job satisfaction (can actually get things done) with more money and just a better way of doing things. I've now been back in the UK for longer than I was in OZ and have no regrets at all - I'm not bothered if I never go there again - in fact, if I have enough money for a holiday in Oz, I'd use it to go somewhere else. I don't hate or dislike Oz, its just that I don't find it that interesting. I had a great time there but its just not for me. I guess its OK if the height of your life's ambition is a better house than the one you had in the UK (but that's open to debate, considering to poor build quality of Oz houses), better access to sea fishing and beaches with sandflies, over priced and rubbish beers but, for variety of experience, travel and culture, Oz is far behind the UK. As I said, I had a great time, and left the UK for what I thought were all the right reasons, but now I'm back I really really appreciate all the points that I took for granted and am making the most of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Curse of the expat! Once you've done it there'll always be a niggle I fear! With every move you move somewhere new, you can never go back to what you had as the world turns while you are away and other people in your life move on. If you have the freedom to move on to something better then go for it, otherwise draw a line and get on with what you've got - Good Luck! If it works you win and if it doesn't, you move on! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fifi69 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Thank you for your honest thoughts. A lot of us move here thinking all of Aus us the same.....nope it's all different. As for being an expat:confused: First of all you hate where you live, so you move. For a while your in holiday mode and love it, then you face trouble here and want to go back to the familiar. You go back for a holiday, see your mates, have a lovely time, but miss the great weather and outdoors in Aus. Thats the thing, for some, you have great things on both side of the world. Difficult to choose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srg73 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Some decisions in life should be impulsive but need to be carefully considered, moving to Australia away from family is one of those decisions. You need to consider your reasons for moving....weather, why not move to Spain, opportunities.....why not USA the land of opportunity etc etc, all are closer to UK than Australia. I believe a very clever immigration drive has made Australia very attractive to many although does not live upto the hype once you arrive. Even the immigration system, only allowing the few in makes you feel lucky and obliged once invited to the land on milk and honey? For us in Brisbane, we have not experienced many of your negatives and are really enjoying our stay, beginning to feel like home. Our Australian friends and work colleagues are far from racist, in fact are welcoming and interested. S Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srh82 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 (edited) Below Edited July 8, 2015 by srh82 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srh82 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Great post. Australia gets inside you. I can relate to a lot of what has been written although some of the Perth-specific issues mentioned we have not really experienced. That said, we know they do exist on the east coast if you look hard enough (aka cashed up bogans). My partner and I have been talking about where our future lies for last few years. We have a great life in Brisbane but career-wise we want more - maybe Sydney or Melbourne is a solution for us, or maybe London (again) is somewhere we should live again. We still have property and all our respective families in the UK so the pull to go back is there. But, the lifestyle is so hard to let go of. Time will tell whether we ever leave. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostMyWay Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 (edited) Enjoyed this read, it really reminds me a bit of my own journey! We moved to Melbourne and after nearly 2 years decided we wanted to be back in UK to start a family and within 4 weeks we were back home! Life was not at all what we expected and our family just annoyed us! 7months later we were back in Melbourne after deciding that family wasn't enough and we wanted to give our future children a 'better' lifestyle. That isn't the case, by the time we had children all the things we had missed about the country we no longer accessed! I was very happy to be back in Melbourne until my daughter was born nearly 2 years ago and we have since been talking about our eventual return again! We are doing things differently this time and not being impulsive like last time. We have visited England twice since my daughter was born and it has cemented our decision to go back! I am due to give birth in Sept and we plan to fly back with an 8week old!!!!!!! I am so ready to be back in England for a multitude of reasons, however I am so nervous as we did this once before and 'failed' and Australia has been our home now for over 5 years and although I yearn for and miss England, I fully expect I will feel the same for Aus once we're back home! It's a novelty being a foreigner yearning for their homeland but when we return we'll just be another English couple amongst the English-how average!! I feel for you and your family because the curse of the expat is indeed a curse, I wish you all the best in your adventure and I hope eventually you find peace.....I know all I really want to do it settle somewhere and build a life! Edited July 8, 2015 by LostMyWay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzhead Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Really interesting read this thread. As someone who is on the verge of applying for a 189, I am taking from this that the most important thing is to manage my expectations. Emigrating carries with it a lot of hyperbole eg 'living the dream' or 'fairytale move'. I guess that none of these things actually exist. It's simply life in a different place. I think the majority of people place too much pressure on themselves trying to pursue the 'dream' instead of anticipating what is effectively a simple change of scenery albeit a fair distance away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzhead Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 I wonder if there may even be a mindset amongst us of 'hey, I gave up my job, friends and family to come here; how dare you not be constantly perfect in return!' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Que Sera Sera Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Really interesting read this thread. As someone who is on the verge of applying for a 189, I am taking from this that the most important thing is to manage my expectations. Emigrating carries with it a lot of hyperbole eg 'living the dream' or 'fairytale move'. I guess that none of these things actually exist. It's simply life in a different place. I think the majority of people place too much pressure on themselves trying to pursue the 'dream' instead of anticipating what is effectively a simple change of scenery albeit a fair distance away. Yes all of the above but also read what people write with a huge pinch of salt, one persons view or take on reality can be very different. For example my experience living here in Perth is almost completely different on almost every level to those of the OP. Can we both be right. Yes we can as Perth is a huge sprawling diverse place with lots of people living here. I'd query the flies though, 6 weeks at the most per year not 6 months unless you were living in a swamp or something :laugh::wink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzhead Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Yes all of the above but also read what people write with a huge pinch of salt, one persons view or take on reality can be very different. Yes, there will always be a great deal of subjectivity involved when evaluating these things. Diff'rent strokes and all of that! Again, I think expectations are the key as to whether one settles or not (in addition to missing family of course). This is my third time visiting Melbourne, one of which was a year long stay, so I'm at an advantage in the respect of knowing exactly what to expect of the lifestyle and culture. However, I know this isn't a luxury some can afford. I am a childless single guy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxlornaxx Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 My story very similar. .except sydney n north qld involved...i think it's good to try different areas of aus coz they are soooo different..ive heard of ppl arriving in one city..not liking it in judging whole of aus on this n goin bk to uk..that's daft! I'm looking forward to returning to aus this year..now I've bn bk I knw aus is for me..even wth the little things I'll miss Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bristolman Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 I wonder if there may even be a mindset amongst us of 'hey, I gave up my job, friends and family to come here; how dare you not be constantly perfect in return!' ^^^^This, absolutely. We have a few British friends who were recent arrivals in Australia and they would just about jump down your throat if you said anything that could be considered critical of Australia. It was like you were trying to burst their bubble or something. They would constantly be saying 'well you can't do that back in the UK' when not only was it perfectly possible to do it often we had in fact done it. Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booma Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Thank you for your honest thoughts. A lot of us move here thinking all of Aus us the same.....nope it's all different. As for being an expat:confused: First of all you hate where you live, so you move. For a while your in holiday mode and love it, then you face trouble here and want to go back to the familiar. You go back for a holiday, see your mates, have a lovely time, but miss the great weather and outdoors in Aus. Thats the thing, for some, you have great things on both side of the world. Difficult to choose. thats so true. you dont get how massive it is till you move here & how much variety there is for different lifestyles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 The other thing to bear in mind is that we all change and what suits us as a 30 something may be the last thing we want to do as a 50 something. Needs change, priorities change and attitudes to prevailing conditions change. I know many 30-40 yr veterans of Aus who would kill to live back in UK if they could but when they moved over in their 20s all was hunky dory - I guess we were all more in adventure mode back then but then real life sort of smacks you about a bit and hey, nice place for an adventure but let me go home! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MARYROSE02 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 The other thing to bear in mind is that we all change and what suits us as a 30 something may be the last thing we want to do as a 50 something. Needs change, priorities change and attitudes to prevailing conditions change. I know many 30-40 yr veterans of Aus who would kill to live back in UK if they could but when they moved over in their 20s all was hunky dory - I guess we were all more in adventure mode back then but then real life sort of smacks you about a bit and hey, nice place for an adventure but let me go home! I disagree because I know many 'thirty something' Pommie/Irish migrants who are in the peak of their carerers here in OZ, and have no desire whatsoever to return to the UK or Ireland. I was with some of them tonight watching NSW v QLD in Origin III. We were all watching the first day of England v Australia on oen of the other screens. These guys may have been in 'adventure mode' when they came out here, but now they want to, if not settle down, keep on working in their six figure salaried jobs. Why would they want to return to the UK? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atlas Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Interesting post, thank you for sharing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 I disagree because I know many 'thirty something' Pommie/Irish migrants who are in the peak of their carerers here in OZ, and have no desire whatsoever to return to the UK or Ireland. I was with some of them tonight watching NSW v QLD in Origin III. We were all watching the first day of England v Australia on oen of the other screens. These guys may have been in 'adventure mode' when they came out here, but now they want to, if not settle down, keep on working in their six figure salaried jobs. Why would they want to return to the UK? Dunno, but a lot of people do get over it but often because of their finances/families/whatever they're trapped. Most of the ones I know are retired but financially shackled Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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