Things you miss about Britain

[Blue Flu]

30 minutes ago, Toots said:

The seaside towns of the UK were lovely places for a holiday until the cheap package holidays to Spain/Greece came about way back in the 60s.  As a child and young teen I enjoyed great holidays with cousins and their parents at Blackpool, Yarmouth, Scarborough and a few other places but a lot of them have gone downhill since then.  

Many were used to house the excess of homeless from the loss of council property in places like London. London 'farmed' out many former tenants throughout the country. On the other hand, during the eighties an mass unemployment numerous seaside towns become in tabloid parlance become known as Costa Del Doles. 

[MARYROSE02]

27 minutes ago, Toots said:

The seaside towns of the UK were lovely places for a holiday until the cheap package holidays to Spain/Greece came about way back in the 60s.  As a child and young teen I enjoyed great holidays with cousins and their parents at Blackpool, Yarmouth, Scarborough and a few other places but a lot of them have gone downhill since then.  

I did a lot of English seaside resorts in the late 90s and early 2000s. I was frightened of flying so I drove down to the West Country. Name a seaside town, and some inland towns and I stayed there - Lyme Regis, Sydmouth, Dartmouth, Falmouth, St Ives, Newquay,, Bude, Port Issac (Doc Martin?"), Ilfracombe, South Moulton. There were some others but I can't think of the names. I liked Newquay because it reminded of me of Australia with its surf beaches, lifeguards, some of them Aussies too. I stayed in Bournemouth one week and in Sandown on the Isle of Wight the next.

Some of the hotels did half board which I liked. I went East into Kent once and also to South Wales. I liked to do a bit of walking then and the coastal paths are excellent in most of those places. I'm still trying to think of an inland town down towards St Ives. I stayed in a pub in the main street, one with a well inside the bar (covered by a glass top). There was a brewery in the town - Blue something.

Plenty of people don't like to travel abroad. One of my aunties went to Poole every year. I met a bloke in a B and B in Bude who told me he'd been going there every year since 1972 - had been through five different hotel owners.

 

[Blue Flu]

30 minutes ago, MARYROSE02 said:

I did a lot of English seaside resorts in the late 90s and early 2000s. I was frightened of flying so I drove down to the West Country. Name a seaside town, and some inland towns and I stayed there - Lyme Regis, Sydmouth, Dartmouth, Falmouth, St Ives, Newquay,, Bude, Port Issac (Doc Martin?"), Ilfracombe, South Moulton. There were some others but I can't think of the names. I liked Newquay because it reminded of me of Australia with its surf beaches, lifeguards, some of them Aussies too. I stayed in Bournemouth one week and in Sandown on the Isle of Wight the next.

Some of the hotels did half board which I liked. I went East into Kent once and also to South Wales. I liked to do a bit of walking then and the coastal paths are excellent in most of those places. I'm still trying to think of an inland town down towards St Ives. I stayed in a pub in the main street, one with a well inside the bar (covered by a glass top). There was a brewery in the town - Blue something.

Plenty of people don't like to travel abroad. One of my aunties went to Poole every year. I met a bloke in a B and B in Bude who told me he'd been going there every year since 1972 - had been through five different hotel owners.

 

Forgive me for stating the obvious, but England is on an island. One does not need to fly to enter another world. Ferries abound. Netherlands, Denmark, Norway, Belgium, France and Ireland. Unless one is inflicted by a 'foreign/er phobia'  fear of flying is hardly relevant living in UK. 

But yes plenty of very pleasant English seaside resorts. I expect Wales is as well. For surfing beaches and culture hard to beat Biarritz in France or Nazaire in Portugal.  

Edited February 9, 2022 by Blue Flu

[MARYROSE02]

4 hours ago, ramot said:

This ‘bogan’  had a great trip there recently. I prefer the Sunshine Coast obviously, but certainly will never be critical of people’s choice of where to live or holiday.

Had my brother chosen The Sunshine Coast I would probably have been enthusing about Noosa. Similarly, he might have gone to Main Beach, Broadbeach, Burleigh, or Coolangatta but he chose Surfers. I ended up in Sydney 43 years ago and both my brothers followed me there.

I lived in the Hilton in Surfers for eight months in 20/21 and now I'm back there, presently in a hotel room but they have two bedroom apartments which you can rent for $750 a week if you commit to at least 28 nights and that is very reasonable for Surfers. I've looked on Booking.com.

As I've said before, the thing i like about Surfers is the sheer convenience with everything I need within about a 5 minute walk. I went to the supermarket today - 200 metres from the Hilton, no need to do a big shop with a trolley, no need to drive for however it takes.  The tram service is excellent, outside my door and stops at the two major shopping centres - Australia Fair at Southport and Pacific Fair at Broadbeach, and also stops by the casino, the specialist doctors in Southport and Gold Coast hospital/Griffith uni.

I like seeing all the tourists around but I also like that I can become a "local" eg by joining the Surf Club, or rather rejoining it. Some of the staff know me and I know a young couple who go there. It's the same with two or three restaurants, bars and cafes. so far, more acquaintances than friends but they may develop down the track, as it did in Sydney when I returned there after 12 years in England.

The one thing I dislike is the hoons who hire scooters and mopeds and race along the shared path on the Esplanade.  As I said to one of the staff in the surf club last night, "I feel safer crossing the road than I do the footpath."

 

[MARYROSE02]

17 minutes ago, Blue Flu said:

Forgive me for stating the obvious, but England is on an island. One does not need to fly to enter another world. Ferries abound. Netherlands, Denmark, Norway, Belgium, France and Ireland. Unless one is inflicted by a 'foreign/er phobia'  fear of flying is hardly relevant living in UK. 

But yes plenty of very pleasant English seaside resorts. I expect Wales is as well. For surfing beaches and culture hard to beat Biarritz in France or Nazaire in Portugal.  

Yes, you are right. I could have taken a ferry to the Continent, as I used to do with my parents in the 1960s. I suppose  I was a bit nervous of travelling abroad by car on my own, trying to speak French. Perhaps a lack of confidence in myself combined with a desire not to be too far away from "Home." Fear of flying was/is another facet of it and included flying within the UK. I wasn't afflicted with a phobia about "foreigners" or travelling to foreign lands. I happily travelled on my own in England and Australia (also an island!) Travelling on my own is my default position.

[Blue Flu]

9 minutes ago, MARYROSE02 said:

Had my brother chosen The Sunshine Coast I would probably have been enthusing about Noosa. Similarly, he might have gone to Main Beach, Broadbeach, Burleigh, or Coolangatta but he chose Surfers. I ended up in Sydney 43 years ago and both my brothers followed me there.

I lived in the Hilton in Surfers for eight months in 20/21 and now I'm back there, presently in a hotel room but they have two bedroom apartments which you can rent for $750 a week if you commit to at least 28 nights and that is very reasonable for Surfers. I've looked on Booking.com.

As I've said before, the thing i like about Surfers is the sheer convenience with everything I need within about a 5 minute walk. I went to the supermarket today - 200 metres from the Hilton, no need to do a big shop with a trolley, no need to drive for however it takes.  The tram service is excellent, outside my door and stops at the two major shopping centres - Australia Fair at Southport and Pacific Fair at Broadbeach, and also stops by the casino, the specialist doctors in Southport and Gold Coast hospital/Griffith uni.

I like seeing all the tourists around but I also like that I can become a "local" eg by joining the Surf Club, or rather rejoining it. Some of the staff know me and I know a young couple who go there. It's the same with two or three restaurants, bars and cafes. so far, more acquaintances than friends but they may develop down the track, as it did in Sydney when I returned there after 12 years in England.

The one thing I dislike is the hoons who hire scooters and mopeds and race along the shared path on the Esplanade.  As I said to one of the staff in the surf club last night, "I feel safer crossing the road than I do the footpath."

 

Had your brother chosen Useless Loop over here in The West, or Manangatang in Vic or for that matter Muff in Ireland or Titty Hill in England you would most likely be enthusing about one of those places. 

You could always hire your own scooter and out hoon the hoons, taking a few out in the process. 

[Blue Flu]

8 minutes ago, MARYROSE02 said:

Yes, you are right. I could have taken a ferry to the Continent, as I used to do with my parents in the 1960s. I suppose  I was a bit nervous of travelling abroad by car on my own, trying to speak French. Perhaps a lack of confidence in myself combined with a desire not to be too far away from "Home." Fear of flying was/is another facet of it and included flying within the UK. I wasn't afflicted with a phobia about "foreigners" or travelling to foreign lands. I happily travelled on my own in England and Australia (also an island!) Travelling on my own is my default position.

Ideal thing about travelling alone is you are open to all experiences. Worst is probably in a couple. If open,  it is super easy to cross paths with others and travel A to B at least. Especially when younger. Lots of fun. 

England and Australia are a cinch to travel alone in . By phobia, I don't necessarily mean a dislike of foreigners, but a fear of coping out of comfort with things like language, food, customs, and so on and so forth. 

[Ken]

6 hours ago, MARYROSE02 said:

Yes, you are right. I could have taken a ferry to the Continent, as I used to do with my parents in the 1960s. I suppose  I was a bit nervous of travelling abroad by car on my own, trying to speak French. Perhaps a lack of confidence in myself combined with a desire not to be too far away from "Home." Fear of flying was/is another facet of it and included flying within the UK. I wasn't afflicted with a phobia about "foreigners" or travelling to foreign lands. I happily travelled on my own in England and Australia (also an island!) Travelling on my own is my default position.

How on earth did you get to Australia with a fear of flying? Before direct flights you risked flying half way and then being unable to board the flight for the next leg! 

[MARYROSE02]

18 minutes ago, Ken said:

How on earth did you get to Australia with a fear of flying? Before direct flights you risked flying half way and then being unable to board the flight for the next leg! 

I was OK in my younger years.

[MARYROSE02]

7 hours ago, Blue Flu said:

Had your brother chosen Useless Loop over here in The West, or Manangatang in Vic or for that matter Muff in Ireland or Titty Hill in England you would most likely be enthusing about one of those places. 

You could always hire your own scooter and out hoon the hoons, taking a few out in the process. 

I didn't want to face another lockdown on my own.  That's why I headed north to Surfers in July, 2020. My brother would not have gone anywhere cold. 

I would like to see the hoons banned from the promenade. 

[MARYROSE02]

6 hours ago, Blue Flu said:

Ideal thing about travelling alone is you are open to all experiences. Worst is probably in a couple. If open,  it is super easy to cross paths with others and travel A to B at least. Especially when younger. Lots of fun. 

England and Australia are a cinch to travel alone in . By phobia, I don't necessarily mean a dislike of foreigners, but a fear of coping out of comfort with things like language, food, customs, and so on and so forth. 

I've no desire to travel to the Third World but I invariably get on well with other races and peoples. I'm presently learning Japanese though I have no great desire to go to Japan. 

[Marisawright]

15 hours ago, MARYROSE02 said:

Had my brother chosen The Sunshine Coast I would probably have been enthusing about Noosa.

 

Having read your posts over the years, I can pretty much guarantee it.  

i've seen you say you enjoyed living in Perth, in Surry Hills (Sydney), in Surfers, in the New Forest, and even in Penrith (Sydney).  Plus other places I've no doubt forgotten.

Looking at those places, they're all very different in character, culture, amenities, lifestyle.  You're lucky that you're so flexible.   Most people have much more definite opinions about where they enjoy living - maybe they love living in a metropolis so they'd hate being in a suburb or a tiny village, for instance.  I get the feeling that you're so adaptable, you have difficulty understanding why other people can't be the same. 

[Blue Flu]

7 hours ago, MARYROSE02 said:

I've no desire to travel to the Third World but I invariably get on well with other races and peoples. I'm presently learning Japanese though I have no great desire to go to Japan. 

Although Japan is very much First World as I'm sure you know. Wonder why you started to learn that? A hard language so there needs to be a strong desire to make any sort of progress. Are in search of a Japanese partner perhaps? 

But no interest in visiting developing world countries rules out any country within easy reach of Australia. Bad for someone that doesn't like to fly, I'd have thought. 

[Blue Flu]

7 hours ago, MARYROSE02 said:

I didn't want to face another lockdown on my own.  That's why I headed north to Surfers in July, 2020. My brother would not have gone anywhere cold. 

I would like to see the hoons banned from the promenade. 

I appreciate it must be hard. Obviously if WA had been your choice, you would in all likelihood have been able to avoid lockdowns. 

[Blue Flu]

10 minutes ago, Marisawright said:

Having read your posts over the years, I can pretty much guarantee it.  

i've seen you say you enjoyed living in Perth, in Surry Hills (Sydney), in Surfers, in the New Forest, and even in Penrith (Sydney).  Plus other places I've no doubt forgotten.

Looking at those places, they're all very different in character, culture, amenities, lifestyle.  You're lucky that you're so flexible.   Most people have much more definite opinions about where they enjoy living - maybe they love living in a metropolis so they'd hate being in a suburb or a tiny village, for instance.  I get the feeling that you're so adaptable, you have difficulty understanding why other people can't be the same. 

I suspect it may well be partly a case of not the place so much but the contact in the place. Which is fine and simplifies likes and dislikes. 

Edited February 9, 2022 by Blue Flu

[Jon the Hat]

Right now I miss the ability to buy a cheap decent car.  A combination country / covid timing issue.

[calNgary]

1 hour ago, Jon the Hat said:

Right now I miss the ability to buy a cheap decent car.  A combination country / covid timing issue.

They have gone crazy here that is for sure. I was going to sell my 2007 model ute about 3 or 4 years ago, with the mileage it would have brought about $7k,, now same vehicle , more mileage are selling for over $10k. Boats and Jet Skis have rocketed up too since Covid and are bringing high $$$$$$ second hand.

Cal x

[MARYROSE02]

On 10/02/2022 at 08:23, Marisawright said:

Having read your posts over the years, I can pretty much guarantee it.  

i've seen you say you enjoyed living in Perth, in Surry Hills (Sydney), in Surfers, in the New Forest, and even in Penrith (Sydney).  Plus other places I've no doubt forgotten.

Looking at those places, they're all very different in character, culture, amenities, lifestyle.  You're lucky that you're so flexible.   Most people have much more definite opinions about where they enjoy living - maybe they love living in a metropolis so they'd hate being in a suburb or a tiny village, for instance.  I get the feeling that you're so adaptable, you have difficulty understanding why other people can't be the same. 

I've been concentrating on my Open Uni the last few days as it's a "workshopping week" where we post our own assignments - short stories - and comment on each other's work. But I was thinking about what you said all the time, or part of the time anyway!

Many of those places that you mention I moved for specific reasons. I moved to Surry Hills because I couldn't cope with the bus from Narrabeen and I wanted to be able to walk to work at Garden Island. Actually, Surry Hills was a little too far to walk comfortably - 40 minutes and then if the caissons were out in the dry dock that meant another ten minutes to walk round the far end of the dry dock. So I moved to a trendy, inner city suburb but not because I wanted to be trendy!

I got a job in Penrith otherwise I'd never have gone there. Since I finished working there in 2014 I've been back once. It's 55 kilometres from Central but whilst I was working there I had 40 minutes to wait for the train after work and I started to explore Penrith. I also drove out there sometimes and drove around after work. I began to appreciate it. It's a "proper" town rather than a suburb. It's got a High Street just like in England. It's got a big shopping mall, performing arts centre and the station is half way between Katoomba and Sydney so there's a good train service.

But it's also a long, long way from the beach. Did we talk about "living the dream" once? I hate the phrase but for me it means "living on or near a beach." Why move to Australia if you can't live close to the beach?! But unless you owned a house in London, if you move to Sydney you might have to buy a house in Penrith? And they're not cheap now. I suppose you adapt. Build a pool in your back yard, use a public pool and make use of the Nepean river and the Blue Mountains.

Then I got a job in Parramatta and I went through the same process. I still hated commuting but Parra is 30-40 minutes instead of 50 to 70 minutes. I had time to kill after work and I explored Parramatta and began to appreciate it as I did Penrith. In both cases, had I been at the start of my career I might have moved there. That's I what I did when I got my first job in Sydney - in Neutral Bay in 1979, moving from Kingsford. Come to think of it, I got to know Kingsford/Randwick because I stayed in residential colleges at the UNSW in Dec/Jan 78/79.

Even in the New Forest I was brought up in one village - Blackfield - but after I came to Oz, my parents moved 7 miles north to Marchwood and it took me a while to adjust to Marchwood when I lived there. My memories were almost all of Blackfield where I grew up and went to school. Marchwood is actually a better location because it's seven miles to Soton rather than fourteen.

Perhaps it's not so much that I'm adaptable as that I've had to adapt to my situation. I hate commuting especially in the peak hour (which lasts all dau every day in Sydney). So move closer to my workplace or in the case of Penrith, try to get the Blue Mountains train which only stops four times and has a toilet on board! 

I suppose with regard to other people I guess it's more not being able to understand how someone would prefer the place to the people? I couldn't imagine moving to Marchwood now to live on my own ten thousand miles away from my brothers and nieces and nephews. A pub is a pub. A supermarket is a supermarket. An Indian restaurant is an Indian restaurant, whether they are in Southampton, Sydney or Surfers Paradise. But for others, it's got to be a pub with a thatched roof and Camra approved real ale, ASDA or Tesco, and a 'real' Indian restaurant in England not India!

[MARYROSE02]

On 10/02/2022 at 08:33, Blue Flu said:

I suspect it may well be partly a case of not the place so much but the contact in the place. Which is fine and simplifies likes and dislikes. 

Yes, you are right. If you mean by 'contact' - 'people' whom I know and family, yes. I have done it tough in earlier times. Not quite as 'adaptable' as I could have been. Back in the 80s and 90s I was barely coping with work and on weekends  I was lonely and isolated. I used to see my brother and his family every Sunday. Looking back I wish I'd just quit the job  and gone back to England to live with my parents. When I lost that job I did go back to England and live with my  parents. But they have both passed away now and I came back to Australia where I still have family.

My local pub in Sydney used to be not too bad. It's a typical inner city Sydney 19th century building with the ironwork balconies but inside it's absolutely horrible. They moved the pokies from the back bar to the front bar and that mean the windows are all blacked out so the pokies are invisible from the street. The 'drinking bar' is now at the back in a dark, dank, windowlesss room with astroturf for carpet but I know all the staff and most of the people who drink there. There are any number of 'nicer' bars within easy walking distance but why would i want to sit on my own in them when I have friends in the other pub?

Actually, I'm in Surfers Paradise now, into my third week here and I've got  new local - the Surf Life Savers' Club. I already knew some of the staff from when I was here before. The view over to the promenade is much nicer than the one from the pub in Sydney but I don't go there for the view; I go for the people.

If I can be a bit sarcastic. 'Ugh! I don't like Aussie pubs. No atmosphere, no history, no thatched roof, no Tudor beams and the beer! That's not beer.' But my two locals in Marchwood - the snooker club and the Roebuck - were both built in 1986 when the village was being redevloped. They don't sell real ale either but who cares? I was a local and I knew people in both of them. After my Dad died we had the reception in the snooker club.

 

[Marisawright]

1 hour ago, MARYROSE02 said:

I suppose with regard to other people I guess it's more not being able to understand how someone would prefer the place to the people?

You may not understand it, but I think it's important that you (and I) respect the fact that other people don't think like we do, and don't try to talk them out of it or argue against their feelings.  If that's how they feel, it's how they feel.

[Blue Flu]

1 hour ago, MARYROSE02 said:

Yes, you are right. If you mean by 'contact' - 'people' whom I know and family, yes. I have done it tough in earlier times. Not quite as 'adaptable' as I could have been. Back in the 80s and 90s I was barely coping with work and on weekends  I was lonely and isolated. I used to see my brother and his family every Sunday. Looking back I wish I'd just quit the job  and gone back to England to live with my parents. When I lost that job I did go back to England and live with my  parents. But they have both passed away now and I came back to Australia where I still have family.

My local pub in Sydney used to be not too bad. It's a typical inner city Sydney 19th century building with the ironwork balconies but inside it's absolutely horrible. They moved the pokies from the back bar to the front bar and that mean the windows are all blacked out so the pokies are invisible from the street. The 'drinking bar' is now at the back in a dark, dank, windowlesss room with astroturf for carpet but I know all the staff and most of the people who drink there. There are any number of 'nicer' bars within easy walking distance but why would i want to sit on my own in them when I have friends in the other pub?

Actually, I'm in Surfers Paradise now, into my third week here and I've got  new local - the Surf Life Savers' Club. I already knew some of the staff from when I was here before. The view over to the promenade is much nicer than the one from the pub in Sydney but I don't go there for the view; I go for the people.

If I can be a bit sarcastic. 'Ugh! I don't like Aussie pubs. No atmosphere, no history, no thatched roof, no Tudor beams and the beer! That's not beer.' But my two locals in Marchwood - the snooker club and the Roebuck - were both built in 1986 when the village was being redevloped. They don't sell real ale either but who cares? I was a local and I knew people in both of them. After my Dad died we had the reception in the snooker club.

 

I think many would agree on your perspective on Aussie pubs. It was a shame that both English pubs here in the inner city of Perth closed their doors. At least a resemblance of Englishness (even if a little faux) What remains barely pasts muster . Not a big fan of the so termed small bar Perth explosion. Perhaps I haven't given them a fair go but it doesn't do it for me so why bother? 

We have a couple of pubs in Leederville (Perth Surry Hills) where I think you did visit. An Irish one is pick of the bunch but all are expensive to my reckoning to make it a regular , at least along the lines of London. 

We still talk about the great night we had last time in England, in Portsmouth at The Bridge pub. Never struck anything close here in Australia especially the people we related with. Similar up in Yorks in Whitby and further opp in Newcastle . At a pub in London close to Marble Arch, they play traditional 'knees up. singalongs on the piano and attracts a regular crowd. We they learnt we lived in Australia The Wild Colonial Boy and Waltzing Matilda were added and most everybody seemed to know the words. 

I can see you settling in Surfers. As for myself, I'd prefer somewhere like Bournemouth , but of late am not seeing any houses in the affordable range apart from in less desirable locations. Don't really want a flat so don't know. But changes are coming in the housing market with rising interest rates which might change the market in ways few are willing  to accept at the moment. 

[MARYROSE02]

On 12/02/2022 at 18:30, Blue Flu said:

I think many would agree on your perspective on Aussie pubs. It was a shame that both English pubs here in the inner city of Perth closed their doors. At least a resemblance of Englishness (even if a little faux) What remains barely pasts muster . Not a big fan of the so termed small bar Perth explosion. Perhaps I haven't given them a fair go but it doesn't do it for me so why bother? 

We have a couple of pubs in Leederville (Perth Surry Hills) where I think you did visit. An Irish one is pick of the bunch but all are expensive to my reckoning to make it a regular , at least along the lines of London. 

We still talk about the great night we had last time in England, in Portsmouth at The Bridge pub. Never struck anything close here in Australia especially the people we related with. Similar up in Yorks in Whitby and further opp in Newcastle . At a pub in London close to Marble Arch, they play traditional 'knees up. singalongs on the piano and attracts a regular crowd. We they learnt we lived in Australia The Wild Colonial Boy and Waltzing Matilda were added and most everybody seemed to know the words. 

I can see you settling in Surfers. As for myself, I'd prefer somewhere like Bournemouth , but of late am not seeing any houses in the affordable range apart from in less desirable locations. Don't really want a flat so don't know. But changes are coming in the housing market with rising interest rates which might change the market in ways few are willing  to accept at the moment. 

I was being, or trying to be  sarcastic about SOME Pommies's reactions to Aussie pubs!

I may have gone to one bar on Leederville. Back in 1978 I remember a guy at the hostel saying,  "Come on Dave, put 2 bucks in.  I'm going to the bottlo at the pub in Leederville for some p$%&." Maybe it was Subi I was talking about. I did go to a couple there,  one of them where the Perth Ozspurs met. I liked the Windsor when I was there. 

 Bournemouth is nice though I come from near Southampton 30 miles or so to the east. Which has the best hospitals?!

I'm in an Irish bar in Surfers, nobody here.  I just fancied a last beer.  I had a meal earlier then drinks in the Surf Club. 

I suppose when you go to a pub for the first time you are attracted to the ambiance,  atmosphere, the way it looks from the outside and then inside,  but I just like a place where I know a few people. 

After I left the Surf Club I crossed the road and walked along the seafront which is one of the things I like about it here.  There are not many places that I can do that whether in England or Oz.

[MARYROSE02]

On 12/02/2022 at 18:05, Marisawright said:

You may not understand it, but I think it's important that you (and I) respect the fact that other people don't think like we do, and don't try to talk them out of it or argue against their feelings.  If that's how they feel, it's how they feel.

It makes for a boring and one-sided "debate" though. "This is how I feel and I only want people to post if they agree with me."

[tea4too]

5 minutes ago, MARYROSE02 said:

It makes for a boring and one-sided "debate" though. "This is how I feel and I only want people to post if they agree with me."

Debate doesn't have to be adversarial, it's possible to have sympathy and a degree of understanding for another person's view without having to agree with it. Discussion is an ebb and flow of thoughts, ideas and opinions, but conversations  risk being closed down when one or both parties simply deliver their opinions forcefully in an attempt to win the argument. Why bother if the other person is not listening and simply waiting for a gap in the conversation to repeat what they want to say over and over again until we give up and walk away?  (Rhetorical question by the way....!) T x

[Marisawright]

6 hours ago, MARYROSE02 said:

It makes for a boring and one-sided "debate" though. "This is how I feel and I only want people to post if they agree with me."

You don’t have to agree, you can say that’s not how you feel and what your experience is. 

The aim is to have a discussion rather than a “I’m right and you’re wrong” debate