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tea4too last won the day on May 15 2013

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  1. You did clarify that in your first post of the thread, together with the timescale you agreed as a family and how things have changed along the way. Fwiw I don't read your posts as a criticism of Aus, more an affirmation that you need to be somewhere else to feel complete. As you were honest from the outset it is sad that things have not worked out as planned but life, people and emotions can be incredibly hard to predict accurately. Take care BugF, especially of your mental health as you are managing a stressful time. Tx
  2. I think it is more than an appreciation of tangible things. You can find a nice area to live, have a decent standard of living and enjoy what the local community has to offer in most first world countries. An extra dimension such as the weather will seal the deal for many and they never look back. For others an intangible element that feels like a piece of the jigsaw is missing, never goes away. The feeling may ebb and flow but is ever present, and over time can become a weight that throws a shadow over everything in life, even the good and positive aspects. It's not a choice thing. I started another thread recently about genetic memory and I do think there is a degree of merit in the theory that some people inherit a sense of belonging through their DNA. And if that's true no matter how hard an individual tries to settle, how many friends they make, how the rest of the family feels... they themselves will always be drawn and attached to somewhere else by invisible threads. T x
  3. tea4too

    Moving back to the U.K tomorrow (Christmas Day!)

    So exciting - a new chapter, a new adventure! I've been to Guernsey but not Jersey, however I think I could easily live in the Channel Islands which have their own history and culture, and also happen to be a really beautiful part of the world. T x
  4. There's a lot of evidence in the animal kingdom, with behaviour previously explained as instinct now thought to be inherited as a form of genetic memory. But interestingly researchers from the University of Michigan suggest all living organisms, from bacteria to humans, have a genetic memory of their ancestral surroundings, which struck a chord with me. Having recently done some digging into our family history I was really surprised to discover a whole line of ancestors born and bred in Wales.I had no idea, I thought we were incomers who were just lucky to settle well. But maybe the sense of belonging I've always been aware of was actually down to DNA. T x
  5. I came across the term genetic memory a while ago and a current thread in UK Chat reminded me of it. Basically there's some evidence to suggest that human behaviour may be influenced by events passed down through our DNA. I've attached a link to an old BBC report that goes into a bit more detail but, if memory can be passed between generations, could this go some way to explain the sense of belonging many identify with, but fail to rationalise? T x https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-25156510
  6. tea4too

    Your one word that separates the UK from Australia

    Timeless - from the architecture, to the arts, to the fields & hedgerows, to hearing a Welsh choir sing Calon lan. Tx
  7. No-one can ever walk in another person's shoes, but people tend to make value judgements based on their own experience irrespective of whether it is actually relevant or valid. It's not always meant to be critical but can feel that way when no allowance is made for the fact that we are all different and see the world differently. Take a break if you need to Snoozy, but don't allow the opinions of others to silence your voice or stop you posting if/when you want to. Big hugs. T x
  8. I wish there was an easy answer Snoozy, if only because you have struggled for such a long time. If you haven't already done so, maybe think about a chat with a doctor or counsellor as they may be able to point you in the direction of coping strategies or organisations that might lift a little of the sadness you feel. Either way use the forum to connect with others if you need to, you are not alone in how you feel and as a member of PIO you are still part of a community of sorts. Take care. T x
  9. @Snoozy lived in South Wales though and if she grew up in the Valleys the type of community she is referring to is more than the friendly, supportive neighbours that most of us appreciate. To be fair very few places remain unchanged and the pit closures, unemployment and chronic ill health associated with working in the mines have had a big impact over many years, however the beating heart of the Valleys has always been the generations of people and families who live there. Many areas in England manage similar legacies but Welsh topography means these towns and villages are almost set apart, which perhaps reinforces the sense of living in a tight knit community. Sadly the Valleys are suffering some of the highest Covid-19 infection rates in the UK just now and it's been suggested the very closeness of friends and neighbours may be a contributory factor, but I read a quote recently along the lines of 'we need to be close and can't change a culture that's been in our DNA for centuries,' which sort of underlines a sense of community that would be difficult to replicate elsewhere. T x
  10. tea4too

    House sitting on 870 visa

    If Australian tax, employment, immigration law is anything like the UK's, meeting the requirements of one area of legislation will not necessarily have any relevance to another. As such whether tax is liable on notional income is possibly separate to whether an activity violates visa restrictions relating to employment. Either way I'd guess that professional advice would probably depend on individual circumstances. T x
  11. tea4too

    House sitting on 870 visa

    Payment in Kind is receipt of goods and services as payment instead of cash. Friends and relatives do it without thought but usually it is a favour and the recipient does not rely on the goods/service as part of their income. In theory someone housesitting 'free' is actually receiving in kind the equivalent of the cost to rent the place furnished, plus any additional services. I can see how that might raise issues, particularly as professional house sitters exist and will provide a similar service for a fee. T x
  12. Oh Snoozy, that is a long time to struggle. I see from your earlier posts that 'home' is South Wales, and I wondered if you knew about the Welsh Society of WA that is based in Perth? If you can't go to Wales maybe a little bit of Wales can come to you. Take care, and though it's only a virtual one just wanted to send a big cwtch. T x https://wawelshsociety.org.au/page.php/aboutus
  13. The fact that some immigrants have the means and determination to keep moving until they find a location to suit them is fine, but it's not obligatory nor is it necessarily the gold standard for how to go about things. Many issues can affect people's lives - finance, opportunity, personal relationships and mental health to name but a few and if life is a continuous struggle, the answer may not be to take a leap of faith and hope things will be better elsewhere. Fat and fire is possibly a huge factor in such circumstances, with a safe return to a familiar environment the better, or even the only, practical option for some. Maybe it's inevitable on a forum such as this that we read posts in the context of our own experience, but challenging others to be more like ourselves makes no sense. If it did, you would all follow my lead and save on the expense of migration by finding a lovely corner of the UK to call home and be happy! T x
  14. tea4too

    Talking Retirement

    Just a thought @davlap but have you come across Mens Sheds? I saw a programme about the organisation a while ago and was impressed by the set up and the difference it seemed to make to members.T x https://www.health.gov.au/initiatives-and-programs/mens-sheds
  15. tea4too

    Would you move to the UK now?

    In all honesty, I am not sure this is the best time to relocate to the UK. The country is not managing Covid-19 well (although the devolved nations do seem to be faring relatively better so far), the economy is shrinking with no obvious green shoots to suggest improvement in the foreseeable future, Education is struggling with a raft of issues including cancelled exams, remote learning and social distancing, there are concerns that the high number of Covid cases is putting such a strain on the NHS that other serious health needs are not being investigated or met. Unemployment is also climbing as business struggles to manage the lockdowns. Brexit is another factor as the UK ends it's relationship with the EU in January but has yet to finalise any type of deal so the uncertainty is a problem and, if nothing else, no-one can guarantee at this stage how trade will be affected in the early months of 2021. In short it is a period of intense change and while personally I am happy to live in the UK, we are sitting tight to some extent to see how things move or settle around us. I would worry for any family member returning and hoping to resettle quickly. T x