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do the locals and British expats bond well?


scott pett

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Hi there just wondering how well the locals take to british migrants in Victoria. I am planning to move myself my wife and two kids over and was wondering if we would be welcomed as I have heard some negative feedback from the Perth area. Also would the kids fit in and be welcomed by there class mates. ... thanks scott

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I'm from the Perth area so can't comment in Vic but we find you get what you give. We have found both in work and socially that we have been warmly accepted but we have witnessed many whingers who moan openly about all things that aren't British and they generally do not mix with anyone other than fellow Brits. Be open to differences and understand that continually slagging off your host country will not make you popular and you'll do fine.

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To a significant extent Scott, the answer will depend as much on you and your kids as it will on anything else. If you and they make friends OK in the UK, you'll do it here too. It helps to have experience of settling in new places and new situations - people can struggle if they have lived in one place all their lives just round the corner from their family and friends they made whilst they were at school. Your kids, almost certainly, will have a close circle of friends faster than the adults in the family. What advice I can give is that you need to get out and meet people, accept invitations, and offer a few as well. People bond on shared interests, so what is it that you want to spend your time doing, or have an interest in - where are you going to meet people? In that sense, whilst some of the opportunities are different, shared interests from golf clubs and scuba diving to choirs and political parties are all just as effective at building social networks here as they are in the UK.

 

We expected to get some flak for being British in Australia, but we've had nothing of the sort. We've worked at it, but we've actually made good friends relatively easily, and continue to do so, whilst our teenage daughter has an extensive network of good friends. Generally we've found people to be positive towards us as poms, and as everywhere, a good sense of humour, honesty, warmth and empathy go a long way. For sure you will meet people you don't like, and who don't like you, but in general Victorians seem to be a warm and friendly bunch.

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Strange that you've heard a few negatives about Perth. I've not had any negative responses from anyone, as far as I know my wife has had nothing but good experiences, our kids never had a problem (one was born here and regards himself as true blue anyway). I've found most people to be more interested in where your from and what it's like then most go on to tell you where their parents or grandparents hail from.

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I'm from the Perth area so can't comment in Vic but we find you get what you give. We have found both in work and socially that we have been warmly accepted but we have witnessed many whingers who moan openly about all things that aren't British and they generally do not mix with anyone other than fellow Brits. Be open to differences and understand that continually slagging off your host country will not make you popular and you'll do fine.

 

Absolutely - be open about difference, and positive about the new world you live in. Different is not worse, or better, just different. See the positives, embrace change, look at what you have gained, not what you have lost.

 

And in Victoria, an absolute essential, adopt an AFL team - I'm not being entirely lighthearted about this, as the locals are obsessed with AFL and you need to fit in. It does not matter which team (so long as it is not Collingwood, who seem to be universally loathed) since it is an infinitely greater social stigma to have no affiliation than to have one different to your questioner. Initially, this will seem arbitrary and you will not understand the game or its culture. Give it a couple of seasons and providing you have thrown yourself into it properly (ie. watched your team, made an effort to understand the game etc) you will find yourself sharing that same irrational loyalty you do for your UK football team, and actually looking forward to the new AFL season.

Edited by fensaddler
To highlight the fundamental importance of AFL!
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Absolutely - be open about difference, and positive about the new world you live in. Different is not worse, or better, just different. See the positives, embrace change, look at what you have gained, not what you have lost.

 

And in Victoria, an absolute essential, adopt an AFL team - I'm not being entirely lighthearted about this, as the locals are obsessed with AFL and you need to fit in. It does not matter which team (so long as it is not Collingwood, who seem to be universally loathed) since it is an infinitely greater social stigma to have no affiliation than to have one different to your questioner. Initially, this will seem arbitrary and you will not understand the game or its culture. Give it a couple of seasons and providing you have thrown yourself into it properly (ie. watched your team, made an effort to understand the game etc) you will find yourself sharing that same irrational loyalty you do for your UK football team, and actually looking forward to the new AFL season.

:laugh: As above but obviously West Coast Eagles for us :wink:

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And in Victoria, an absolute essential, adopt an AFL team - I'm not being entirely lighthearted about this, as the locals are obsessed with AFL and you need to fit in. It does not matter which team (so long as it is not Collingwood, who seem to be universally loathed) since it is an infinitely greater social stigma to have no affiliation than to have one different to your questioner. Initially, this will seem arbitrary and you will not understand the game or its culture. Give it a couple of seasons and providing you have thrown yourself into it properly (ie. watched your team, made an effort to understand the game etc) you will find yourself sharing that same irrational loyalty you do for your UK football team, and actually looking forward to the new AFL season.

 

Thanks for supplying a handy reason why I haven't made any friends after 5 years in Victoria - it's all because I have no interest in AFL and don't support a team...

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I've never found that anyone cares that i'm a pom. We are hardly a rare breed over here.

 

Don't bang on about how everything is better back home and i'm sure you will get on with them.

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Hi there just wondering how well the locals take to british migrants in Victoria. I am planning to move myself my wife and two kids over and was wondering if we would be welcomed as I have heard some negative feedback from the Perth area. Also would the kids fit in and be welcomed by there class mates. ... thanks scott

 

It is all down to your attitude to life and people Scott. If you start banging on about how much better it is in UK or comparing things so that Oz is in the negative, then you will have issues. So keep a positive and friendly attitude and meet people halfway and you will be fine.

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And in Victoria, an absolute essential, adopt an AFL team... It does not matter which team (so long as it is not Collingwood, who seem to be universally loathed) since it is an infinitely greater social stigma to have no affiliation than to have one different to your questioner.

 

Don't worry if you're not a sports fan! We have plenty of Aussie friends who couldn't give two hoots about sports. Just find people with similar interests and you'll be right. Melbourne is such a cultural mix, nobody really cares where you are from.

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Absolutely - be open about difference, and positive about the new world you live in. Different is not worse, or better, just different. See the positives, embrace change, look at what you have gained, not what you have lost.

 

And in Victoria, an absolute essential, adopt an AFL team - I'm not being entirely lighthearted about this, as the locals are obsessed with AFL and you need to fit in. It does not matter which team (so long as it is not Collingwood, who seem to be universally loathed) since it is an infinitely greater social stigma to have no affiliation than to have one different to your questioner. Initially, this will seem arbitrary and you will not understand the game or its culture. Give it a couple of seasons and providing you have thrown yourself into it properly (ie. watched your team, made an effort to understand the game etc) you will find yourself sharing that same irrational loyalty you do for your UK football team, and actually looking forward to the new AFL season.

 

So you really believe all that Collingwood stuff, I am sorry but you really are not getting the Aussie humour at all. Hating Collingwood is just a laugh, how do I know because I am not really a supporter but if I have to have a club its Collingwood. I even got a job because I supported Collingwood, now that is a laugh, but that is the humour of it all. We all hear about the humour of the Brits and I understand it as I am one and married one, my parents both Brits etc etc but I also understand the Aussie humour because I have been here for such a long long time. Dry dry dry and more dry. People think they are being insulting and believe things that are just not true.

 

Yep people take their footy seriously but not that seriously and its a bit of fun taking a footy team, you don't even have to go to have a team.

 

I think that Brits are very sarcastic in humour these days and its not that nice, The Office never did it for me. However the Aussies take dry to a whole new platform and people just take them the wrong way.

 

On every other point except for Collingwood I agree with you, accept the difference.

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People couldn't give a toss about where you come from as long as you don't keep on with the "Back home we ....." Or "In XXX we used to ...". The humour is different and might have you scratching your head while they are laughing their socks off but you'll probably find some folk you will get along with just fine. You might get called a whinging Pom (even if you aren't) because it is "good natured banter" so don't take offence.

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So you really believe all that Collingwood stuff, I am sorry but you really are not getting the Aussie humour at all. Hating Collingwood is just a laugh, how do I know because I am not really a supporter but if I have to have a club its Collingwood. I even got a job because I supported Collingwood, now that is a laugh, but that is the humour of it all. We all hear about the humour of the Brits and I understand it as I am one and married one, my parents both Brits etc etc but I also understand the Aussie humour because I have been here for such a long long time. Dry dry dry and more dry. People think they are being insulting and believe things that are just not true.

 

Yep people take their footy seriously but not that seriously and its a bit of fun taking a footy team, you don't even have to go to have a team.

 

I think that Brits are very sarcastic in humour these days and its not that nice, The Office never did it for me. However the Aussies take dry to a whole new platform and people just take them the wrong way.

 

On every other point except for Collingwood I agree with you, accept the difference.

 

I thought the office was Ricky Gervais best work by far. He's gone steadily downhill ever since. Didn't like the American version though, they don't get subtle or dry humour.

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Guest The Pom Queen

Anyway Scott, support Collingwood and you can be a toothless feral like me :wink:

You find where the kids are concerned they love the English accent so expect them to make lots of friends straight away.

Where in Melbourne are you heading?

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First of all I would like to thank everyone for there positive replys.... feel welcome already lol. I am not sure what area in vic we will be moving to yet but I have a friend in Melbourne that has givn me a list of good areas. Me and my wife are both outgoing people and my kids are bonkers so am sure they wont have a problem meeting friends. I was also wondering if there are clubs for mothers and toddlers. My wife has made a few friends from the classes over here with our first born and by the time we get over out boy should be about 1 so she would be looking for clubs like this. Just wondering if there are clubs like that over there. Thanks again for all feedback ...scott

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Anyway Scott, support Collingwood and you can be a toothless feral like me :wink:

You find where the kids are concerned they love the English accent so expect them to make lots of friends straight away.

Where in Melbourne are you heading?

 

We are thinking tje outskirts of Melbourne but not sure what area yet... any recommendations? Also I hope they are just as fond of the Scottish accent lol

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I was also wondering if there are clubs for mothers and toddlers. My wife has made a few friends from the classes over here with our first born and by the time we get over out boy should be about 1 so she would be looking for clubs like this. Just wondering if there are clubs like that over there.

 

There's an organisation called Playgroup which fits this bill. Below is the page for Playgroup Victoria. There is a link to all their locations. Once you know where you will be living you will probably find several you can access.

 

http://www.playgroup.org.au/

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Guest The Pom Queen
We are thinking tje outskirts of Melbourne but not sure what area yet... any recommendations? Also I hope they are just as fond of the Scottish accent lol

Oops lol. As long as they can understand you :tongue: No seriously they love people's accents.

Melbourne is huge with so many different suburbs. Its so hard to say an area as it would depend where you were working. I love the Mornington Peninsula and Berwick area. There are plenty of mother and baby groups so your wife will be fine

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Times have changed vastly. Theres more of a melting pot now than ever, the olden days of the majority culture being descendents of UK have been diluted. Some myths still endure..but they are probably mainly relegated to the bars of old bowls and rsl clubs. I remember in the 80s poms and asians were usually the butt of many jokes. Mostly through ignorance and lack of exposure. Ironic eh? A lot of of those that held their prejudice, say to poms were children of 10 pound poms themselves! Perhaps the feelings were well ingrained from convict times where most were Irish and there was a strong contempt for British police and landowners who had bad reputations historically.

 

And the Union Jack still stands out on the Aussie Flag... Only few decades ago God Save the Queen was still the anthem and currency were in pounds and pence etc.. Nowadays in general the age of affordable travel and the internet and time allowed to stir this melting pot more rigorously has changed the face of Australia. Its much easier to integrate now if you are a pom. People are more likely to respect difference. In fact youd be appreciated more, as long as where some have said..dont criticise the place and dont try to impose your baggage.

 

Yes old mythologies still remain...its whats left of the old world that aussies try hard to hold on to..(because theres not much else to hold on to in this era of mass globalisation)...so the notion of the bush..mateship, fair dinkum (which could have well be originally coined by the chinese in the 18th goldfields cry of 'real gold' )etc etc still prevail.. however these are all fragments of the old... as those least understood layers that underlie a still new country deeply rooted by migrant settlement only a couple of hundred years but an ancient country realistically tamed by aborigines over eons.

 

Get out give it a "Fair Go" and "She'll be Right mate" :wink:

Edited by gee13
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