ScotsQuine Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Although this sounds absolutely perfect for me - would love to live in such a remote "backwater" - personally very envious that you are lucky enough to live in such a place. Likewise having a home in the middle of no where, with miles and miles of nothing but greenery (or brown in summer!) and no neighbours in sight is my (and OHs) idea of heaven!! Each to their own, we are all different, but you and your wife/partner need to be on the same page. Talk to her, she may not even be aware of your feeling of isolation. And before someone jumps in to say living rurally and dreaming about it are very different. Yes, we have lived in this situation before. We had 14 acres of 'Rural Heaven' in Scotland and we loved every minute of it Looking forward to the kids moving out and doing so again in WA... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 I spent some time in Tassie living 'isolated'. I had kids with me, though, so that helped. Couldn't stand it, drove me up the wall after about 6 weeks! You need to move nearer to clubs and interests and stuff. Join things. Are you a church goer? Sometimes in the isolated areas the churches are fantastic. If you are 50 maybe U3A things, Red Hat Society, even Probus though you are a bit young for that yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumpingjellybean Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Likewise having a home in the middle of no where, with miles and miles of nothing but greenery (or brown in summer!) and no neighbours in sight is my (and OHs) idea of heaven!! Yes I agree. I have done it before too and loved it. And I didn't have chance to be bored; as there was so much to do every day. Keeping fences in repair, mowing grass and weeding, and keeping all our fruit and vegetable growing under control (planting, picking and chopping for storage), was a task in itself. Then we baked our own bread, made our own preserves, made our own beer and so on, so that took up time each day. Looking after our pets and dealing with neighbours chickens was always “fun” too. I wanted chickens or duck of our own for eggs, but OH was working a full time job and I didn’t want to get lumbered with this by myself. Finding freshly laid eggs from free ranging chickens takes hours! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumpingjellybean Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 people when relatively young need "life" a quiet place in the backwater might be OK for a retired couple or even some younger people who are not that bothered about meeting other people, visiting different places and seeing just something different. I am in my early 40's and want to return to rural living. When I lived rural it was in my 20's and loved it. Don't need other people to validate my existence. But met a lot of them nevertheless at community dances and whatnot. Prior to that had traveled the world and had already seen interesting things. But everyone is different - thank goodness or it would be a very boring world! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest241083 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 ...........I don't think Dayboro is isolated TBH..... ..........less than an hour to the city or the coast..... ..........( have pm'd you some events and places near you offering your choice of interests) ..........you can feel isolated surrounded by people..... ...........it's about seeking out something you enjoy.....people to connect to.... ...........even if you have to travel a bit.... ...........I too live rural...... ...........grow my own......chickens .....dogs.....horses.... ............but it doesn't have to restrict you..... ............many will maintain your garden,chickens.....in return for the produce and eggs.... ............top up waters......feed pets.... ............enjoy where you are for what it can offer..... .............and look beyond for social interaction..... .............what's an hour for an evening/ day......at the city.....or a bustling seaside town.... .............to then be able to return to the peace and beauty of a lovely town....good luck... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumpingjellybean Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 ...........I don't think Dayboro is isolated TBH...............less than an hour to the city or the coast..... It really sounds like a nice place. And it looks beautiful on the internet search I did......and ONLY 45 minutes from Brisbane CBD. You can easily have dinner and drinks in the city socializing and then drive home. Best of both worlds. I WANT TO LIVE THERE NOW! I am soooooooo envious. When I said I lived rural; I was 500kms from the nearest city. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest241083 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 .........500 kms.....! ..........that's rural.....lol.... ..........Dayboro attracts large groups of moterbike enthusiasts on weekends..... ..........often stopping at the pub on the way to Woodford and Mt mee.... ..........perhaps something the OP would enjoy... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumpingjellybean Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 ..........Dayboro attracts large groups of moterbike enthusiasts on weekends..... Now that would be annoying - motorbikes are so loud - destroying the rural peace. There is a really nice drive from Sydney through Wisemans Ferry (Great North Road) and up to the Hunter Valley along the sandstone convict trail. The peace and tranquility is shattered every weekend by large groups of motorbike enthusiasts vibrating their noise around the valley. But yes may suit the OP quite well - good way to make friends Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest241083 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 ..........I guess many don't like the noise..... ..........but as their mainly just passing through..... .........they bring custom to the pub and bakery lol...! .........lots of long winding roads to attract them nearby..... ...........and many ime are friendly and interesting to chat too ...........there are also many horse trails in and around Dayboro..... ............but I meet them on a different day..! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Oh I thought you meant real isolation- 1 hour from the city is not, its just normal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonrbh Posted October 9, 2015 Author Share Posted October 9, 2015 Hi Ggs I think you and I seem to think on the same wavelength. What was I thinking! You're right, everyone is so busy with their own lives and work, plus being the paternal taxi too. My OH's S-I-L is forever running two teenagers here,there and everywhere. So people say you shouldn't look back and only look to the future but having the analytical mind I do, IMHO unless you look at why you are unhappy, which means comparing the present with the past, and to some extent your possible future without changes, then you're never going to resolve the cause of that unhappiness! My OH was born and brought up 5kms down the road and lived on a pineapple farm until she left to go to UQ in Brisbane to study, so I think it's inherent that she adores the set up we have. Top of her 'wish list ' when we were deciding on a property was 'not to be within spitting distance of neighbours'! Back in the UK we were also rural, backing onto a forest, but with neighbours close by and also a market town 4 miles away where you could get everything that I now have to travel 5 times that distance for! We also had several pubs that stayed open until 23:00hrs or longer. To add to that there is also the friends and family factors and to be honest, I truly believe that Brits are, in general, more friendly and have more meaningful relationships that antipodeans. There are obviously contributory factors to this, not that I'm going to analyse it here and now. Having only bought in Dec 2014, and having paid over $20K in stamp duty, you're right, to sell would mean losing quite a bit of money when you factor in the real estate fees, buying, selling, moving costs and taxes! If we do anything in the immediate future it may well be to look at renting our property out and renting somewhere closer to the things I'm looking for in my existence. Simon. I am similar vintage to you (55 next week). Like you reasonably financially set with no mortgage and savings to tide us over until I draw my pension at 60. Will have to work for the 'extras' though such as travel and property upgrades. We also have an 11 year old daughter so a major financial consideration for us though this does, I agree, provide some scope for building social contacts though, as in the UK, everyone is probably pretty busy with work and running their home and taxi-ing kids around. Reading your post you are clearly a smart guy and the overwhelming feeling I get is "what were you thinking?". You and your partner sound like chalk and cheese or has she only just become a reading/knitting/TV kind of person? We stayed in temporary accommodation which was a 'granny annex' on acreage on arrival. Nice views but confirmed my view that isolating myself in a new country was not a good idea. My first thought was moving closer to some action but I suspect you are thinking 'lose a shedload of money moving house and location but it only scratches the surface of my issues with Queensland living'. It really does sound as though you are not where you need to be for your own peace of mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gbye grey sky Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 Hi Ggs I think you and I seem to think on the same wavelength. What was I thinking! You're right, everyone is so busy with their own lives and work, plus being the paternal taxi too. My OH's S-I-L is forever running two teenagers here,there and everywhere. So people say you shouldn't look back and only look to the future but having the analytical mind I do, IMHO unless you look at why you are unhappy, which means comparing the present with the past, and to some extent your possible future without changes, then you're never going to resolve the cause of that unhappiness! My OH was born and brought up 5kms down the road and lived on a pineapple farm until she left to go to UQ in Brisbane to study, so I think it's inherent that she adores the set up we have. Top of her 'wish list ' when we were deciding on a property was 'not to be within spitting distance of neighbours'! Back in the UK we were also rural, backing onto a forest, but with neighbours close by and also a market town 4 miles away where you could get everything that I now have to travel 5 times that distance for! We also had several pubs that stayed open until 23:00hrs or longer. To add to that there is also the friends and family factors and to be honest, I truly believe that Brits are, in general, more friendly and have more meaningful relationships that antipodeans. There are obviously contributory factors to this, not that I'm going to analyse it here and now. Having only bought in Dec 2014, and having paid over $20K in stamp duty, you're right, to sell would mean losing quite a bit of money when you factor in the real estate fees, buying, selling, moving costs and taxes! If we do anything in the immediate future it may well be to look at renting our property out and renting somewhere closer to the things I'm looking for in my existence. Simon. If you can find a tenant that covers your rent elsewhere then that may be an answer (though the rental income will be taxable I assume) so you may be out of pocket. Money is really secondary to your sanity so I really hope that your partner can compromise on her 'wish list'. I don't know whether Brits are more friendly. I come from the south east of England which, in my view, is likely to be the least friendly place in the UK. My early impressions of the locals here and my neighbours is that they are really friendly (with us and each other) and very accepting of us. Maybe we have been lucky. I do not expect any friendships here to be the same as those I made in England as there is clearly a distinct culture difference (I have no interest in Rugby League or fishing which could make me a pariah). I am living in the suburbs but not a pub person (I lived for 12 years in the UK within 100 yards of a pub and never even went in) and there are no pubs around me here so probably not on your wavelength fully, though I can empathise with your predicament. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supercow Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 In the UK I really enjoyed hiking, cycling, motorcycling, scuba diving, swimming, having a beer and eating out with friends I've still got from as far back as school days. (Big) Si. Out of interest, why don't you do the same things there? Reason I ask, is because mountain biking saved my sanity in the UK. I met new people and have made the best of friends, through mutual interests. (in fact, it's the only thing I'm going to miss about the place) While you may not know people straight off the bat, you'd surely get to meet people that way? Cycling in particular I feel is a very socialble activity, with a lot of online communities to join / expand on your exposure to other people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 If you can find a tenant that covers your rent elsewhere then that may be an answer (though the rental income will be taxable I assume) so you may be out of pocket. Money is really secondary to your sanity so I really hope that your partner can compromise on her 'wish list'. I don't know whether Brits are more friendly. I come from the south east of England which, in my view, is likely to be the least friendly place in the UK. My early impressions of the locals here and my neighbours is that they are really friendly (with us and each other) and very accepting of us. Maybe we have been lucky. I do not expect any friendships here to be the same as those I made in England as there is clearly a distinct culture difference (I have no interest in Rugby League or fishing which could make me a pariah). I am living in the suburbs but not a pub person (I lived for 12 years in the UK within 100 yards of a pub and never even went in) and there are no pubs around me here so probably not on your wavelength fully, though I can empathise with your predicament. Give it time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 I think you and I seem to think on the same wavelength. What was I thinking! ... My OH... Top of her 'wish list ' when we were deciding on a property was 'not to be within spitting distance of neighbours'! Back in the UK we were also rural, backing onto a forest, but with neighbours close by and also a market town 4 miles away where you could get everything that I now have to travel 5 times that distance for! We also had several pubs that stayed open until 23:00hrs or longer.. Simon, I know it's a bit irrelevant now- but didn't ANY of that occur to you when you were buying the house, or did you just let her buy whatever she wanted? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mims Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 We lived in Dayboro for a month in January 2014 and it's super beautiful and yes not THAT far from the city but it's a horrible journey to get there and I completely appreciate that sometimes you just want things on your doorstop. My one worry about our permanent move to Australia is meeting people, my intention is to join every club and social opportunity going, there has surely got to be something within reasonable distance of Dayboro?? The family we stayed with in Dayboro were super lovely, her hilarious and perfect if you want a chat, she does all the talking and is so animated and her stories are always comical and interesting, keep your ears open and eyes peeled for nikki (Aussie) and Michael (irish) - some of the best people we met on our travels and right on your doorstep. all the best with your dilemma. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumpingjellybean Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 and yes not THAT far from the city but it's a horrible journey to get there I am seriously considering moving there after reading this post. It looks and sounds lovely. And I am quite use to an hours commute for work; so that does not bother me. Why is it a "horrible journey to get there"? Mims - can you please explain what you mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 I am seriously considering moving there after reading this post. It looks and sounds lovely. And I am quite use to an hours commute for work; so that does not bother me. Why is it a "horrible journey to get there"? Mims - can you please explain what you mean? JJB, I'm conscious the OP might feel a bit insulted as you seem to be saying he's an idiot for minding about a 45 minute drive. I do think there's potentially a big difference between commuting in a city and commuting in the country, and not everyone is comfortable with it. I know I'm not. When I lived in the country, I had a 50 minute commute to the nearest big town. That consisted of 5 minutes to get to the main road, then driving at 120 kph for about 40 minutes, then 5 minutes to get into the centre of the town. I lost count of the number of kamikaze magpies I accounted for driving to work. Driving at night, I was very lucky not to hit any kangaroos or wallabies, but I did kill a beautiful owl which flew straight into my windscreen. If the weather was wet, the drive was more stressful. Although the road was quiet, on Friday and Saturday nights there were too many drunken drivers to feel safe (because there was no public transport, so no "plan B"). So bottom line, eventually we did not go out at night much, because the drive was "horrible". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jumpingjellybean Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 JJB, I'm conscious the OP might feel a bit insulted as you seem to be saying he's an idiot for minding about a 45 minute drive. I do think there's potentially a big difference between commuting in a city and commuting in the country, and not everyone is comfortable with it. I know I'm not.. Ohhhh NO NO NO Sorry not my intention at all! Opps SORRY OP However, I have been looking into the area since reading this post (never heard of it prior) and honestly it looks like the perfect place for me personally to live. I am seriously considering finding a job in Brisbane and moving there. And am keen to know what Mims means by "horrible drive" (i.e.) backroads with minimal street lights, heavily congested roads, kangaroos and wild stock roaming willy nilly across roads, pot holes, etc.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonrbh Posted October 11, 2015 Author Share Posted October 11, 2015 I'll let Mims explain why they feel it is a horrible journey to get to and from Dayboro, I do appreciate what they are saying. I'f it's anything to do with using the Bruce, Gateway or Pacific Highways, or should I call them car parks, then you'll understand. Coming home from work last week I had a Koala scurry across the road right in front of my car. I'f he/she had stopped I'd of killed them, I'd of been mortified if that had happened. If I'd been on my motorbike, it might have taken my off. Don't ride at dawn or dusk they say……if only I could! In the pitch dark of the early morning I regularly get tradies passing me well in excess of the limit and a couple of weeks a go, when going to work on my motorbike, I sped up to see what sort of speed the tradie had passed me was doing and I hit 150 and I wasn't even gaining on him/her! And then there's double white lines…….don't even get me started on that! These drivers don't appreciate that they have just got up and their senses and reaction times are not at their optimum. To some it may seem an idyllic place to live and it is not without it's virtues and as it has already been said, attracts a lot of people with it's scenery, cafe's, winery close by, etc. Every person is different, has different circumstances, jobs, hobbies etc. My OH grew up on a pineapple farm less that 5kms from where we live and feels at home here. She's not one for socialising and hobbies but when I am reminded that as a kid she used to have her nose stuck in a book reading it whilst in the outdoor dunny, with a carpet snake peering down from the rafters, then it may answer a lot of questions! The 2 restaurants don't open past 20:00hrs and are closed on Monday, the same for the pizza place and a similar closing time for the pub too. The roads around here are 100kph limits and given the average aussie drivers standard, it would be suicidal to even think about riding a push bike or walking along the roads around here. To beat the kamikaze tradies, and to get free on-street parking, I head out at 04:40hrs when I'm on early shift, having to arrive by 05:30 to get a parking space…….I don't start work until 06:30! There is a bus that goes from Dayboro to Strathpine in the morning and returns in the afternoon, once only a day! The nearest taxi service is in Samford, 25kms away. The nearest train link is either Petrie of Ferny Grove and both of those are 30+kms away. All the clubs, volunteering groups, etc seem to be in the city and given the fact that I get up at 'daft o'clock' when I'm on early shift, it's not practicable to work, come home, go back out and drive for an hour each way to attend a club that starts after work hours, most probably 19:00hrs, to then drive home a couple of hours later and get in for 22:00 to get back up the following day for an early shift. Late shifts means it would be a 'no-show' anyway. The best I can hope for is a club/organisation that meets weekends! By the way, I work weekends too, depending on my roster! Last night I worked 16:30-23:00 and got in at midnight. Talking to one of my colleagues and asking him if he was going to enjoy his favourite tipple of a single malt when he got in, I was informed 'No, I'm going to go and watch Australia v Wales at The Pig & Whistle' ……..hell was I envious! I don't want to 'live' in a pub, a lifetime of shift work has never been conducive to that, but as many will acknowledge, it's a great place to 'chew the fat' , make plans for hiking, camping trips, stop off after a motorbike ride etc etc…at least in the UK pubs anyway! We went to New Farm Park yesterday for a relatives engagement party and speaking to people they were asking how I was finding it and whether I was settled. When I told them my woes, and bear in mind these are fully fledged Aussies ranging from early 20's to mid 50's in age, a common response was 'I can imagine…….I'd be pulling my hair out living there'! Perhaps that's the reason for my baldness! The other question one of the extended family asked my OH was 'What hobbies and pastimes do you have'? 'None really' came the reply……hmmmm! With my OH having spent 12 years in the UK, 10 of those with me, it only seemed fair to give things a chance here and perhaps hence the reason I have gone along with her wishes. We do have a beautiful house, with a great view, it's just not for me. So before people start saying it looks wonderful and how envious they are of the views and how they'd live here at the drop of a hat, I'll point out that Everest Base Camp has wonderful views…..I'd love to see it, but I don't want to live there! Thanks to everyone for your comments and helpful suggestions so far, please keep them coming. Simon. Ohhhh NO NO NO Sorry not my intention at all! Opps SORRY OP However, I have been looking into the area since reading this post (never heard of it prior) and honestly it looks like the perfect place for me personally to live. I am seriously considering finding a job in Brisbane and moving there. And am keen to know what Mims means by "horrible drive" (i.e.) backroads with minimal street lights, heavily congested roads, kangaroos and wild stock roaming willy nilly across roads, pot holes, etc.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bungo Posted October 11, 2015 Share Posted October 11, 2015 I think only one person has said they would love to live there. Most people have suggested you move, have you considered that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buzzy--bee Posted October 11, 2015 Share Posted October 11, 2015 All the .... volunteering groups, etc seem to be in the city ......... The best I can hope for is a club/organisation that meets weekends! You're not looking hard enough. http://www.coastguard.com.au/flotillaqld/9-qf3 http://www.coastguard.com.au/flotilla/29-qf4 BB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonrbh Posted October 11, 2015 Author Share Posted October 11, 2015 Hi Bungo I've not suggested the majority or everyone has said they would love to live here, hence the 'So before people start saying'. If you look on pg4 when I've replied to Ggs I've mentioned that if we do anything in the immediate future it is likely to be looking at renting out our property and renting elsewhere. It is a option, not one that you can do within 24hrs and it can be quite expensive too, hence why Ive asked for peoples help on the matter, so that I can consider all options (including the Coastguard Volunteer that buzzy-bee has mentioned). When I have spoken to my OH and mentioned areas that might be suitable for renting and providing more social interaction, quite rightly, she has pointed out that some of those areas would virtually double her commute. If we did that I could see the end result just being a reversal of who's unhappy! I'm also glad to Ggs for pointing out possible tax implications of renting out. I think only one person has said they would love to live there. Most people have suggested you move, have you considered that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted October 11, 2015 Share Posted October 11, 2015 Hi Bungo I've not suggested the majority or everyone has said they would love to live here, hence the 'So before people start saying'. If you look on pg4 when I've replied to Ggs I've mentioned that if we do anything in the immediate future it is likely to be looking at renting out our property and renting elsewhere. It is a option, not one that you can do within 24hrs and it can be quite expensive too, hence why Ive asked for peoples help on the matter, so that I can consider all options (including the Coastguard Volunteer that buzzy-bee has mentioned). When I have spoken to my OH and mentioned areas that might be suitable for renting and providing more social interaction, quite rightly, she has pointed out that some of those areas would virtually double her commute. If we did that I could see the end result just being a reversal of who's unhappy! I'm also glad to Ggs for pointing out possible tax implications of renting out. Sometimes you are faced with the dilemma of who copes best with the misery - living with the least worst option is what you may have to do unfortunately! One of those problems that crop up quite regularly in mixed marriages! Good luck sorting it out! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marenmatt1 Posted October 11, 2015 Share Posted October 11, 2015 I think the best thing for you to do is move closer to the city & trial it for a year. If you still aren't happy then you will have to sadly work out what's more important for you, staying here being miserable but with your partner or moving back to the UK possibly alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.