Guest The Pom Queen Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 I really don't know what to say or what I would do if this was my child. Knowing that he has beat cancer once before makes it even more difficult. As a parent what would you do? Personally I think I would make him fight till the end, but I know this is selfish. At present I have refused any more treatment or operations because sometimes enough is enough but then other days I come back and decide to fight. I am suppose to be going back for more ops and treatment but at the moment I feel great, I am sick of hospitals and Drs and can understand if this young boy has chosen to let his time come naturally and enjoy what time he has left without being prodded and poked. That is exactly how I feel I really do feel for his family though as although I understand it and agree with what they are doing, I don't think I would have the courage to do what this brave mum is doing. I suppose that shows I am selfish and only think of myself. What would you do? An 11-year-old boy who has been battling cancer for half of his life has revealed on his online blog that he and his family have decided not to have further treatment to prolong his life. Reece Puddington was first diagnosed with neuroblastoma in April 2008, with doctors telling him there was no cure. Despite the bleak prognosis, by 2010 he had remarkably beaten the disease. But tragically, in 2012, doctors told him he had a liver tumour - and this time the cancer was terminal. Now Reece, from Whitstable, Kent, has delivered the news that he has opted against taking a new drug to possibly prolong his life, in order to start preparing for death. In the heartbreaking Facebook post - entitled The Beginning of the End - he said: 'After careful consideration, my mum thought that if she was doing it for herself she would keep sending me for treatment as she wouldn't want to let me go, but if she was doing it for me she'd let me go. Well, she's letting me go...' Writing on his Facebook page in a post entitled 'The Beginning of the End', he wrote: 'As you know after the latest scan results I was sent home to rest and think over the two possible options. 'I could opt for another trial, but this would mean travelling a lot to the hospital and coping with the side effects, but could also hopefully extend my life, or I could simply do nothing, stay at home and let nature take its course which would lead to me lose my life slightly earlier than if I’d had more treatment. 'My mum had always hoped over the last five to six years that she would have the courage to know when enough was enough. 'After careful consideration, my mum thought that if she was doing it for herself she would keep sending me for treatment as she wouldn’t want to let me go, but if she was doing it for me she’d let me go. 'Well, she’s letting me go...' In January, Reece drew up a bucket list of things he wants to do before he dies, including meeting actor Johnny Depp, seeing his mother Kay learn to drive and building a hobbit house in his back garden. His wishes sparked a worldwide effort from well-wishers to realise his dreams, with most of the list ticked off through generous gifts and donations. Reece’s recent decision sparked an outpouring of grief from people tracking his battle against cancer on Facebook, with more than 300 followers posting comments. Linda Fenwick wrote: 'What a brave young man you are, and also your mum must be so brave as well such a difficult decision to have made, I hope you get to do everything on your bucket list, stay strong xx' While Sara Johnston posted: 'You are an inspirational young man and your Mum is very brave. She must love you so very much. I will still pray for a miracle for you xxxxxx” Reece’s mother Kay, 40, who is a full-time carer for her son, and father Paul, 48, a sales assistant, were first told their son had neuroblastoma in May 2008. One of the things on Reece's bucket list was to have breakfast from Wetherspoon. He isn't able to go himself so his local Wetherspoon brought breakfast to him in bed Reece's list also includes going to South Africa, getting an Xbox One and having a bedroom of his own. He announced his decision to end treatment on his Facebook Reece underwent chemotherapy treatment at The Royal Marsden in Surrey and remarkably his cancer had gone by early 2010, meaning he was able to enjoy life as a normal little boy again. But the youngster and his family suffered a devastating blow in August 2012, when Reece said his head ‘felt funny’ while in the shower and they were told he had a liver tumour. Reece was given a newly-trialled drug but his family were told the devastating news that the cancer would be terminal this time. Tests revealed it had spread to his bone marrow, chest, the left side of his pelvis and his right thigh bone. His fundraising page has so far raised nearly £5,000. Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2562208/Mums-letting-Boy-battling-cancer-six-years-revealed-online-blog-family-heartbreaking-decision-stop-treatment-prolong-life.html#ixzz2tjdR7ji7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul1Perth Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Tough call for a parent. What would you say to them?? I think there comes a time when you have to let someone go and be prepared for it. When it's someone older you know it's coming, when it's your kids how do you prepare yourself for that? I guess you have to show a brave face and keep your crying to private moments. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyHeart Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 As a palliative care nurse with extensive experience and knowledge in this area I support this boy and his Mums choice. An impossibly difficult situation and are showing bravery in the face of the ultimate unhappy ending. I dont know how i mght feel if god forbid it were my boy but i think id go for maximum quality of life over months of side effects for potentially no benefit. Its very much an individual decision however. No right or wrong answer. I hope he packs in as much as he can for his remaining time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abz123 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 I would say let him go, but he's not my child so that makes the decision easier on my part. I truly feel for any parent in that position but if the trial is not going to give him an improvement in his quality of life between now and the inevitable then it is probably a very mature decision not to go ahead with it hard as it may seem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maruska Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 I voted " I don`t know" because I really have no idea what would I do if I was in their situation. I wouldn`t just stop all treatment though, I would want supportive care for him - pain control, hydration..... he could benefit a lot from that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whichway1 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 He and his mum are very brave. I think I'd let him make the choice hopefully to enjoy the time he has left. I bet she's crying in her pillow every night though x x poor family x x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Counting Stars Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Not ever being in that situation I can't be 100% but hubby and I were talking about something similar the other day when the Belgians I think it was were bringing in euthanasia for children and we both said we would try and respect our children's wishes if they were of an age where we felt they understood etc and only if we knew that there was nothing more we could possibly do xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tappers2oz Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Can't type properly. Too many tears. ??? Hope to never ever be in that situation and I hope to god I will never have to make that choice sort of choice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wakeboard1980 Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 I would like to think I would be brave enough to let my child make the decision, with some input. I agree that I woud rather my child have quality rather than quantity, especially when you have no idea about how long the treatment will give. strong little fella Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vickyplum Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Very brave - and Reece must be a trooper to have coped with invasive cancer therapies for 6 yrs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petals Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 Even at 11 it has to be his decision. We want our children or any of our family to live, however we are not the ones going through the treatment and having just done that with my oh, I do not think I would have the strength to do it. I decided to let him go after they had frizzled his spinal cord with the radiation treatment, the pain did not stop with his paralysis. The pills do not stop the pain. Pneumonia every six or 8 weeks. Its not a life. This little boy has been wonderful and as a Mum I would not want any more suffering. Unfortunately people do die of a lot of things and its the body and souls way of telling us its time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 He sounds a very articulate boy and I'm sure that he was involved in the decision making, perhaps he hasn't wanted to carry on for a long time and now he's finally got his mums permission? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LKC Posted February 19, 2014 Share Posted February 19, 2014 He sounds mature beyond his years. Gosh, what a very difficult decision to have to make. As a parent, you would always want to fight for your child's life, but I think that there has to come a point in circumstances such as this, where you have to put your own selfish wants and needs to one side. I think that they have made the right choice, but if I am honest I don't know if I could make the same decision. This puts me in mind of the book/film "My Sister's Keeper". Towards the end of that film, you learn that the girl with leukaemia encouraged her sister to petition for medical emancipation, and in effect decided that she had had enough treatment and that it was time to die. There is a twist at the end of the book though, which means that things don't go exactly that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobj Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 I really don't know what to say or what I would do if this was my child. Knowing that he has beat cancer once before makes it even more difficult. As a parent what would you do? Personally I think I would make him fight till the end, but I know this is selfish. At present I have refused any more treatment or operations because sometimes enough is enough but then other days I come back and decide to fight. I am suppose to be going back for more ops and treatment but at the moment I feel great, I am sick of hospitals and Drs and can understand if this young boy has chosen to let his time come naturally and enjoy what time he has left without being prodded and poked. That is exactly how I feel I really do feel for his family though as although I understand it and agree with what they are doing, I don't think I would have the courage to do what this brave mum is doing. I suppose that shows I am selfish and only think of myself. What would you do? An 11-year-old boy who has been battling cancer for half of his life has revealed on his online blog that he and his family have decided not to have further treatment to prolong his life. Reece Puddington was first diagnosed with neuroblastoma in April 2008, with doctors telling him there was no cure. Despite the bleak prognosis, by 2010 he had remarkably beaten the disease. But tragically, in 2012, doctors told him he had a liver tumour - and this time the cancer was terminal. Now Reece, from Whitstable, Kent, has delivered the news that he has opted against taking a new drug to possibly prolong his life, in order to start preparing for death. In the heartbreaking Facebook post - entitled The Beginning of the End - he said: 'After careful consideration, my mum thought that if she was doing it for herself she would keep sending me for treatment as she wouldn't want to let me go, but if she was doing it for me she'd let me go. Well, she's letting me go...' Writing on his Facebook page in a post entitled 'The Beginning of the End', he wrote: 'As you know after the latest scan results I was sent home to rest and think over the two possible options. 'I could opt for another trial, but this would mean travelling a lot to the hospital and coping with the side effects, but could also hopefully extend my life, or I could simply do nothing, stay at home and let nature take its course which would lead to me lose my life slightly earlier than if I’d had more treatment. 'My mum had always hoped over the last five to six years that she would have the courage to know when enough was enough. 'After careful consideration, my mum thought that if she was doing it for herself she would keep sending me for treatment as she wouldn’t want to let me go, but if she was doing it for me she’d let me go. 'Well, she’s letting me go...' In January, Reece drew up a bucket list of things he wants to do before he dies, including meeting actor Johnny Depp, seeing his mother Kay learn to drive and building a hobbit house in his back garden. His wishes sparked a worldwide effort from well-wishers to realise his dreams, with most of the list ticked off through generous gifts and donations. Reece’s recent decision sparked an outpouring of grief from people tracking his battle against cancer on Facebook, with more than 300 followers posting comments. Linda Fenwick wrote: 'What a brave young man you are, and also your mum must be so brave as well such a difficult decision to have made, I hope you get to do everything on your bucket list, stay strong xx' While Sara Johnston posted: 'You are an inspirational young man and your Mum is very brave. She must love you so very much. I will still pray for a miracle for you xxxxxx” Reece’s mother Kay, 40, who is a full-time carer for her son, and father Paul, 48, a sales assistant, were first told their son had neuroblastoma in May 2008. One of the things on Reece's bucket list was to have breakfast from Wetherspoon. He isn't able to go himself so his local Wetherspoon brought breakfast to him in bed Reece's list also includes going to South Africa, getting an Xbox One and having a bedroom of his own. He announced his decision to end treatment on his Facebook Reece underwent chemotherapy treatment at The Royal Marsden in Surrey and remarkably his cancer had gone by early 2010, meaning he was able to enjoy life as a normal little boy again. But the youngster and his family suffered a devastating blow in August 2012, when Reece said his head ‘felt funny’ while in the shower and they were told he had a liver tumour. Reece was given a newly-trialled drug but his family were told the devastating news that the cancer would be terminal this time. Tests revealed it had spread to his bone marrow, chest, the left side of his pelvis and his right thigh bone. His fundraising page has so far raised nearly £5,000. Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2562208/Mums-letting-Boy-battling-cancer-six-years-revealed-online-blog-family-heartbreaking-decision-stop-treatment-prolong-life.html#ixzz2tjdR7ji7 100% with you, Katie. No more seeing Medicos, no more pills for ills nor potions for motions. Jus tackling it in my own way.:yes: Cheers, Bobj. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petals Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Discussing this with my friend this morning as at present her brother his wife, another of my friend's husband are all fighting cancer. I guess we all want to live but looking at the treatment I know in my heart now that if my oh had not had chemo first but the operation he would have had a better chance, hindsight is a wonderful thing, but it has made me think that we should all question and research and ask for outcomes of others who have similar problems before making ourselves seriously ill which is what cancer treatment does. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyHeart Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Inform yourselves and research the merits of chemotherapy, the ethics of offering chemotherapy, the long term side effects of chemotherapy and the financial aspects. Cancer care is a business. Im not anti chemotherapy, for some cancers (testicular, childhood leukaemias) chemo can offer a 'cure' and for others, breast, some lung cancers, prostate chemo and other targeted therapies can offer significant life extension but for others its a futile and costly exercise. People go down the chemo route as they think they should, it's like giving up otherwise isn't it? In the majority of cases chemo doesn't work, causes long term and short term problems and impacts on quality of life. There is a lot of misinformation and ignorance surrounding chemotherapy out there. Ask yourselves why? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Pom Queen Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Even at 11 it has to be his decision. We want our children or any of our family to live, however we are not the ones going through the treatment and having just done that with my oh, I do not think I would have the strength to do it. I decided to let him go after they had frizzled his spinal cord with the radiation treatment, the pain did not stop with his paralysis. The pills do not stop the pain. Pneumonia every six or 8 weeks. Its not a life. This little boy has been wonderful and as a Mum I would not want any more suffering. Unfortunately people do die of a lot of things and its the body and souls way of telling us its time. This is one of the things that has got to me, it hasn't been the ops but the complications or mess ups, so yes they may cure the cancer but at what price. If they told me my cancer had been cured and I would never have cancer again in my life I don't think I would have had the op still, its like someone else said its the quality of life not the quantity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyHeart Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Some operations related to cancer are pretty much essential though in order to prevent cancer complications causing death. For instance gastric bypass surgery to allow the bowel to continue to function in the presence of extensive tumour, or radiotherapy to spinal lesions that if left untreated may cause paralysis. Various stenting procedures (oesophageal, bowel, bile duct, ureter) to allow the passage of food, bile, faeces or urine that would otherwise cause a slow painful death. This is what palliative interventions are, they treat the symptoms of the disease as oppossed to attempting to remove the cause of the disease.... so it can be detrimental to say NO TREATMENT without being fully informed of the risks and benefits of said treatment to the individual patient Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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