Back from Oz

[Guest mandisfam]

Hi Caroline, I really think a holiday back to UK would be of benefit to you. I remember when my own little girl was born (5 years ago this Thursday), without going into detail we both nearly died during the birth. We lived 3 hours away from any family and we too felt a urge/need to go back closer to our families, during the first few months of her life. We had all intentions of doing this but my husband's job took us even further from our families about 4 hours away, it was offer to good to refuse. This took us up to my little girl's 1st birthday and these feelings of wanted to be near family soon disappeared as a result we moved even further up the country and we now live in North Yorkshire, our families are now 5 hours away in the South East. We are so glad we didn't move back to South East, it would have been the biggest mistake of our lives.

 

I know you are in oz and your family is in England so slightly different distances but I guess Im saying don't rush into the move back, either come back for a holiday or wait until your little girl is a year or 18 mths old and see how you feel then.

 

Hope this made sense.

All the very best.

Mandisfam

[Guest kinglouis]

Hi Caroline,

 

I have just noticed your post and I think I have spoken to you before when I was in the U.K. with regards to your post, The only person who knows what to do deep down is you and your OH. In the short time I have been here I have noted many pro's any many con's, the emotional pull of family being a major one even though they are really cool about it you kind off feel a bit guilty for moving away. Now you have a baby that maybe even stronger, the world is a much smaller place with things like skype internet which has helped my OH settle in very nicely. Eveyone is different and and only you can decide what is right for your family, I miss my family dearly but its only one factor of a bigger picture.

 

this has probably been no help what so ever but I hope you end up happy which ever way you go

 

Good luck

 

Sean & Caroline

[Bod]

So out of all that I posted you have focused on the word dull.....................mmmmmm! Thanks for your dull reply Essex to Aus.......................:no:

Yea it was Dull I focused on.

 

I'm sorry my post never made you a happier person.

 

John

[ali]

Firstly Congratulations on having the baby - wonderful news that everything is now good, I can imagine what a worrying time it must have been and wanting/needing your family being important.

 

Moving back for good when you so obviously love it in Melbourne could be costly, as someone suggested, perhaps a holiday first?

 

Ali

[Bod]

hi all ...

 

haven't logged in since oct last year (you'll see why) and since then have moved from brighton UK to melbourne and been reading this post to catch up and to gain a bit of insight into people's thoughts on australia versus england.

 

hubby and i got to melbourne in november last year really looking forward to our new life here and melbourne has lived up to our expectations completely. since we've been here we've been able to do so much more than we ever did back home, really enjoying trips to botanical gardens, shrine, st kilda beach, brunswick st coffees and are lucky enough to be living fairly centrally so life is good despite the shock that everything is much more expensive than i remember!

 

however ... the real shock to our system was having our beautiful little baby daughter 3 months early!!! had fantastic medical care for her by Royal Women's hospital and will be forever grateful to them as our bub is fine now and growing stronger by the day ... 4 months old praise be!

 

but ... since having our little one we have really felt the lack of family around us - especially going through that really hard time when she was in hospital for 2 months and we had no family to support us.

 

so, we are considering returning home to UK to be with our family but are absolutely DISTRAUGHT to leave as we love melbourne and feel honestly very worried about the UK media's attitude to young people as 'yobs' and 'antisocial' etc etc, let alone the weather.

 

i'm ranting now so i'll stop but wondered if anyone had any thoughts you could put our way as we have not yet made the decision and feel very torn between two worlds.

 

cheers all.

Caroline

 

Hello Caroline

 

Family is such a big issue and at this time you seem to need support. Why do you not go back & get the support you need and plan your trip back when baby is older. You have still time your visa should entitle you to do so till 2011 0r 2012.

There is no getting away from it that it will be a costly proccess but your family happiness is the most important thing. The advise is great what you have recieved.

Only you know your finances & the way you feel but what ever you decide it is important to be posative for baby's sake as well as your's.

 

Brighton is a lovley place there's are alot worse out there.

 

 

Good Luck John

[the hutchies]

Gags, I dont know if you are still checking into this site or not but I just wanted to say a few things. You say that "Some of the people on this website (and in general) strike me as incredibly naive with regards to Australia, making comments about the place either without ever being there or having just arrived and blinded by sunshine." You are obviously talking from experience (a bad one at that I guess?) but in what circumstances did you go to Australia in? I mean had you visited before or did you just go out with your girlfriend? Everyone has to start somewhere and I personally have found this website to be helpful, people tell the truth, both good and bad but your post seems to be totally one sided and the only real post of its kind, all I can assume is that you had a very bad experience, did you split with your girlfriend while you were over there?

 

Another point I have is about children, I take it you don't have children as there was no mention of them? One of the main reasons that we are moving out to Melbourne is because we want more for our kids, I accept that being in a large city crime is more of an issue but the fact that children have things to do after school and more places to see/visit is reassuring compared to the afterschool activities in this country, I am in the same position as you having been raised in a rural location, I live on the Isle of Wight and its stunningly beautiful but there is a whole world out there to see, people can only try and see if its for them, if you have kids like I do then Im sure you will know the fear you have when you think about their prospects here, hanging around the local offy hoping to get someone to buy then some cider, I believe that if kids have other things to do then they are less likely to cause trouble on the streets. Our daughter is a real outdoor person and sadly we can only afford a house with a very small garden and its not always practical to go to a local park so for us a large garden is a very big plus.

 

You made a point about drugs, well I dont know if you have noticed but the UK has the exact same problem. You also said that gambling is socially acceptable, same in this country my friend. It seems that you are using mutual facts to try to paint a bad pic of Australia.

 

I am very happy that you come from a middle class family who could afford for you to holiday at least once a year, in fact I am jelous, I forst travelled abroad in 2000 at the age of 19 after my wife and I saved our wages. I am a skilled worker, I am a panel beater and I work hard for my money which in this country is poor for the work I do, its stressful in the fact that if I don't repair a car correctly and its involved in another accident the conquences could be horrific, and the latest legislation puts this straight onto the panel beater, no one else would be to blame. I travel 3 hours a day to and from work, my journey includes a 1hour boat trip and this costs me £180 a month. The job I have been offered in Australia pays a lot more than in this country, in line with what we should be paid.

 

In our view, and plenty of others will agree and others will not, Australia has a lot to offer, and for your information I like yourself am young, ambitious and cultured!

 

People can only try, don't try to scare people off, tell them the balanced truth, you spent three years out there, if it was that bad why didnt you just come back to the country that you love so much?

 

All I can say to people reading this thread is this, don't be put off by this one thread, read around and make your choice, life is very short, I know from experience, my friend died at 23 and he planned to move to NZ it never happened for him. Weigh up all the pro's and con's make your choice and do what you want, I wish you all the best of luck in what you do with your lives and no one should put you down if things dont work out, put it all down to that great thing life is...experience!

 

Terry.

i agree with every thing you and a lot more are saying regarding this thread.

only missed 2 days viewing on pio cos we went to wembley an god!!! i have been on here 4 hours reading replies to GAGS thread

basically only living down the road from where gags is now living LEEDS is not all that. in fact i would not live there if it was the last place on earth there is guns,knives, drugs,graffitti,gangs, cop killers you name it. so how he/she can compare anywhere to leeds beggars belief.

the reason we are migrating to oz is that we want a better quality of life for our family to spend together. the aussies respect you have a family to go home to. not like here in the uk where the average customer want your pound of flesh and more, expecting you to work more unsocialable hours then try an haggle with the price of materials cos they think they can get em cheaper at B& Q (NOT) .

our "quality time as a family" is none existent here cos "the customer" comes first!!! so yes we are going to give it a good 2 years+ to settle in oz and if we don't like it we can come back, as many have said to us. but we will try not to.:err:

[joetrac]

Hi Caroline

I can totally understand were you are coming from.

 

I found that having such a hugh support network of family to having none the most difficult to cope with.Having your first child(or any child) is so special and I hate the fact that my family miss out on all the special events in my daughters life. I too am leaving ..but its easier for me as I don't love the place...I dont hate it either ...but It hasn't offered me enough to justify my little one not knowing her family.

 

I would say go with your heart and share that precious bundle of yours with people who will appreciate it. You can always come back if you were unhappy.

 

Goodluck:wubclub:

[the hutchies]

hi caroline i agree with mandisfam a holiday would be better

yes it's all well and good having your family with you now, but this may sound harsh you have you own "family" now to consider and maybe in the long run you would be better being in oz for our new family.

but there is only yourself and your oh can make that choice.

hope you make the right one and follow your heart xx

[Bod]

hi caroline i agree with mandisfam a holiday would be better

yes it's all well and good having your family with you now, but this may sound harsh you have you own "family" now to consider and maybe in the long run you would be better being in oz for our new family.

but there is only yourself and your oh can make that choice.

hope you make the right one and follow your heart xx

 

 

 

 

Caroline needs to follow her heart like you say but even going back for a holiday will be costley and could be even more heart breaking leaving her family again after only a short time.

 

Hope you had a good day at wembley I was hoping that Barnley would go all the way, they deseved it.

But remember we are breathing down your neck.

 

John

[Guest melbourne07]

hi all ...

 

firstly thanks so much everyone for your time and advice, its nice to log back in and see so many helpful replies, you stars!

 

its a really tough choice to go back or stay but i feel the holiday option is a good one - and can't believe what you went through mandisfam my god you must feel you can handle anything thrown at you now, well done for your bravery.

 

hi kinglouis, i remember you from before, ahh the heady days of looking forward to coming back to melbourne from england. did you move to sydney or melbourne in the end?

 

cheers again all for your support. :yes:

xx

[Guest kinglouis]

Hi,

Yep we moved to melbourne, we brought a house down in Mornington no regrets, hope all goes well for the new addition to your family

 

good luck to you

 

Sean & Caz

[Nemesis]

i agree with every thing you and a lot more are saying regarding this thread.

only missed 2 days viewing on pio cos we went to wembley an god!!! i have been on here 4 hours reading replies to GAGS thread

basically only living down the road from where gags is now living LEEDS is not all that. in fact i would not live there if it was the last place on earth there is guns,knives, drugs,graffitti,gangs, cop killers you name it. so how he/she can compare anywhere to leeds beggars belief.

the reason we are migrating to oz is that we want a better quality of life for our family to spend together. the aussies respect you have a family to go home to. not like here in the uk where the average customer want your pound of flesh and more, expecting you to work more unsocialable hours then try an haggle with the price of materials cos they think they can get em cheaper at B& Q (NOT) .

our "quality time as a family" is none existent here cos "the customer" comes first!!! so yes we are going to give it a good 2 years+ to settle in oz and if we don't like it we can come back, as many have said to us. but we will try not to.:err:

 

i'm glad we don't have any of that stuff in Queensland. Much safer here guys, no crime, no rip-off tradesmen, no working unsociable hours - everyone finishes at 2pm and spends the rest of the day on the beach. :wacko:

[Bod]

i'm glad we don't have any of that stuff in Queensland. Much safer here guys, no crime, no rip-off tradesmen, no working unsociable hours - everyone finishes at 2pm and spends the rest of the day on the beach. :wacko:

 

 

:jiggy:Dreaming

[calNgary]

where in queensland are you nemesis,,the outback,lol,,i cant say theres no crime ,cause there is although it is much less than the uk,,as for rip-off tradeys,,have you rang for a quote with a pommy accent ,and then got an aussie to ring for the same thing ,,we have and the difference was $150!!!!! unsociable hours and finishing at 2 depends on your job i guess but dosnt happen for everyone.

Cal x

[Guest Les & Woz]

i'm glad we don't have any of that stuff in Queensland. Much safer here guys, no crime, no rip-off tradesmen, no working unsociable hours - everyone finishes at 2pm and spends the rest of the day on the beach. :wacko:

 

:v_SPIN:Sounds like just my cup of tea Nem - book me a space next to you !!!!!

 

Les

:goofy:

[thumbsthings]

So out of all that I posted you have focused on the word dull.....................mmmmmm! Thanks for your dull reply Essex to Aus.......................:no:

I THINK ITS DULL IN THE UK!!!! LOL

[Bod]

I THINK ITS DULL IN THE UK!!!! LOL

 

 

If I come from Lancashire so would I just a bit of luck that I live in tropical Essex

[ali]

I'm a little offended by your comment John - I'm from Lancashire

 

Ali

[Bod]

I'm a little offended by your comment John - I'm from Lancashire

 

Ali

 

 

Yea but you live hear. think your self lucky.

Now I know why you love WA so much.

[Guest JoanneHattersley]

I'm a little offended by your comment John - I'm from Lancashire

 

Ali

My mums from Lancashire! John, you`re out of line

[Bod]

My mums from Lancashire! John, you`re out of line

 

 

Ok ok sorry,

to make it up to you both I'll pop up North and have a hot pot with Willy when I get home.

 

Do any of you know Willy? He's a very famouse Lancastrian

 

John

[alcocainmel]

Shall we quit this before it get out of hand!!

 

I dont think John meant it personally.

 

I have family in Lancashire, however we will never all agree, it would be a boring place if we did!!

 

Deb xx

[Bod]

Shall we quit this before it get out of hand!!

 

I dont think John meant it personally.

 

I have family in Lancashire, however we will never all agree, it would be a boring place if we did!!

 

Deb xx

 

 

Hello Deb

 

I think Ali & Jo know I'm only joking. I hope so I never get upset about Essex jokes.

 

John

[ali]

Yes I did know that you were only joking John- don't worry Deb we're not going to have a major confrontation. Jo and I are still hoping for good parts in the upcoming PIO movie!!

Ali

[Bod]

Yes I did know that you were only joking John- don't worry Deb we're not going to have a major confrontation. Jo and I are still hoping for good parts in the upcoming PIO movie!!

Ali

 

 

Ali ask me who Willy is