Wombat84 Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 All the posts in here are "we moved back", "we decided". It also seems disproportionate compared to the number of my friends in relationships versus not. I'm desperate to move back to the UK but my Australian partner (not married, no kids) is not interested. So if I move it will be on my own. On one hand, I moved out here on my own and I was fine and I'm sure I would manage fine going back by myself. On the other, the idea of not having him share the adventure sucks. So I'm just wondering, among all the "we's", has anyone else on here gone through a big move on their own? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home and Happy Posted January 20, 2017 Share Posted January 20, 2017 All the posts in here are "we moved back", "we decided". It also seems disproportionate compared to the number of my friends in relationships versus not. I'm desperate to move back to the UK but my Australian partner (not married, no kids) is not interested. So if I move it will be on my own. On one hand, I moved out here on my own and I was fine and I'm sure I would manage fine going back by myself. On the other, the idea of not having him share the adventure sucks. So I'm just wondering, among all the "we's", has anyone else on here gone through a big move on their own? Probably because they moved out as a couples and most aussies over 20 are married and already producing their big families. Its not exactly a single persons place like the UK is where staying single into middle age (ie over 35) is quite normal. I think life as a singleton immigrant in Australia could be very lonely. Its more a quiet sort of place for families. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wombat84 Posted January 21, 2017 Author Share Posted January 21, 2017 Probably because they moved out as a couples and most aussies over 20 are married and already producing their big families. Its not exactly a single persons place like the UK is where staying single into middle age (ie over 35) is quite normal. I think life as a singleton immigrant in Australia could be very lonely. Its more a quiet sort of place for families. Sorry, but I entirely disagree. I am in my 30s and I know many people in their 30s who are single and very normal. When I moved here on my own and before I met my partner I had a fantastic time going out and making friends...with local Australians and other immigrants! Australia (at least the east coast, don't know about anywhere else) definitely doesn't seem like a quiet sort of place to me. I know lots of single people in "real-life", I was just wondering whether there are many on these boards who have moved between countries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
movingback Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 Sorry, but I entirely disagree. I am in my 30s and I know many people in their 30s who are single and very normal. When I moved here on my own and before I met my partner I had a fantastic time going out and making friends...with local Australians and other immigrants! Australia (at least the east coast, don't know about anywhere else) definitely doesn't seem like a quiet sort of place to me. I know lots of single people in "real-life", I was just wondering whether there are many on these boards who have moved between countries. I think this is entirely location dependent no matter which country you live in. I agree with you in Sydney. However, if you move somewhere like Tamworth or the outer suburbs of Adelaide, agreed, most people in their 30's would be in relationships/have kids etc. And I suspect it is similar in the UK - London vs Truro for example. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Collie Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 I think this is entirely location dependent no matter which country you live in. I agree with you in Sydney. However, if you move somewhere like Tamworth or the outer suburbs of Adelaide, agreed, most people in their 30's would be in relationships/have kids etc. And I suspect it is similar in the UK - London vs Truro for example. Lots of those in their 30s and 40s are separating and getting divorced now,I know of a good few people going through it right now. I am a single 43 year old (with a beautiful daughter). To say Australia is not suited to older single people is not accurate, there are loads of clubs, meetup groups etc full of older single people enjoying life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 My impression ( only impression though) is that there are more singles than marrieds these days in Melbourne at least, probably Sydney and most of the larger centres too. As for most Aussies over 20 being married. What? You're joking, surely? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newjez Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 All the posts in here are "we moved back", "we decided". It also seems disproportionate compared to the number of my friends in relationships versus not. I'm desperate to move back to the UK but my Australian partner (not married, no kids) is not interested. So if I move it will be on my own. On one hand, I moved out here on my own and I was fine and I'm sure I would manage fine going back by myself. On the other, the idea of not having him share the adventure sucks. So I'm just wondering, among all the "we's", has anyone else on here gone through a big move on their own? I was single when I moved to the UK. Ironically, I had a packed social life during the week but found the weekends boring. Luckily I had mates in other parts of the country and we met up and went exploring. Would you not be upset by leaving your partner? Would he not even go for a long holiday? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foolboy Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 I will be turning 50 soon and have been single most of my adult life. Came here when I was 11 with my family and never fitted in so never connected with Australians. Moved back to UK June 2015 on my own and loved it. Only back in Australia due to illness and will be moving back to UK next year with my younger brother and sister. Life is too short to be in the wrong country no matter if your are single or attached. If it's not working make a change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home and Happy Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 Australia is geared towards family living. There's next to no vibrant pub, club or gig scene like we have back in UK. Its more of a "café" and restaurant sort of culture (which I like) As for nightlife, a street or two in Sydney CBD perhaps plus a rather seedy area (which you really do not want to visit) , a street in Melbourne, a few pubs together at the most in a small street in Perth and less in Adelaide. That's it. It's hardly the same as hitting the town in Newcastle, Leeds, Manchester, Birmingham or London. Way too conservative, that's why all the young ones love to come to UK, more fun and more buzz. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 There have been a number of people on here who moved over as a couple but then split up under the pressure of one partner wanting to move back, some very tragic cases with children involved. I would say move back because the feeling of desperation doesn't go away and can lead in some to full blown depression. Better to bite the bullet now than in 10 years, when possibly children could be involved too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pommysheila Posted January 21, 2017 Share Posted January 21, 2017 Hello Wombat I am like you still wondering what to do not sure how old you are but this year I will be 69 my husband passed 2014 and I am not in touch with my son now since 2015 sadly it is his partner who thinks I am to motherly with her or something anyway 2 Christmases now on my own seems more than enough to me. I was on here last year regarding pensions and if I would be able to keep it I have read if we came out before 2001 we would be okay I came out in 1989 but to be honest I am just to worried to go to Centrelink in casse they say I can't keep it and then it is final I have to stay if that makes any sense to you it is like dammed if you do and dammed if you don't. I would be totally alone has my immediate family have all passed on still have friends over there but been a while and only one still in touch with and I worry they may think I have gone back because they are the only people who I can really call good friends I wouldn't want to put any pressure on them. So here I am shall I or not isn't it artful when you can't make up your mind:confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Banana707 Posted January 22, 2017 Share Posted January 22, 2017 Hi. I am in a very similar situation to you. Ive been with my partner 12 years and here for 8. Its a big decision to move back home and even bigger if it means ending the relationship. I decided to give it another year however to be honest nothing has changed. He wants to stay and I want to go. How long have you been together? Are you happy besides your desires to live in other countries? I still feel torn but in my heart i know i should probably move back however fear and love keep me holding on here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunbury61 Posted January 22, 2017 Share Posted January 22, 2017 Australia is geared towards family living. There's next to no vibrant pub, club or gig scene like we have back in UK. Its more of a "café" and restaurant sort of culture (which I like) As for nightlife, a street or two in Sydney CBD perhaps plus a rather seedy area (which you really do not want to visit) , a street in Melbourne, a few pubs together at the most in a small street in Perth and less in Adelaide. That's it. It's hardly the same as hitting the town in Newcastle, Leeds, Manchester, Birmingham or London. Way too conservative, that's why all the young ones love to come to UK, more fun and more buzz. . A lot more going on ,if you are into that ...shopping ..music live gigs ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Antipodista Posted January 25, 2017 Share Posted January 25, 2017 Hi.I am in a very similar situation to you. Ive been with my partner 12 years and here for 8. Its a big decision to move back home and even bigger if it means ending the relationship. I decided to give it another year however to be honest nothing has changed. He wants to stay and I want to go. How long have you been together? Are you happy besides your desires to live in other countries? I still feel torn but in my heart i know i should probably move back however fear and love keep me holding on here Go back! I was the same and thought there must be something wrong with me for not loving Australia and thought that my love for my husband meant so much more. 2 kids later, we are back in the U.K. for a while due to family illness but I will have to go back to Australia soon as he refuses to stay in the U.K. - for the rest of my life- and I do not have the words to describe how trapped and depressed I feel. My life will now be about my kids, and that's it. Australia is a wonderful country for some but if it's not for you, go before you have kids. Don't make the mistakes I've made. good luck x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brit Girl Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 I'm on my own in living in Perth single and it is very different living out here being single as i'm constantly asked if i'm married with children and why not? Which i find rude! My single status was never questioned when i lived in the UK. I've made a few friends here, have a well paid job, travelled around Australia, but miss my old life back in the UK. My long service leave is up in Feb 2020 and i will be heading back to the UK on my own, no problem! My advice is go where you are happiest and feel you belong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pixieontherocks Posted February 7, 2017 Share Posted February 7, 2017 If you know you want to go back I'd do it. I echo other people's sentiments to do it before you have children because then your partner could stop your children returning to the UK under the Hague Convention. I let fear hold me back for years until my 14-year relationship with an Aussie broke up (2 kids). Going back home in June this year and I'm not looking back. Luckily, my ex is letting me take the children (and is coming too with her partner and their baby). There are lots of great things about Australia but I'm ready to go back and have my parents, brothers and best/oldest mates around again after 12 years away. For me, the homesickness went up and down but never quite left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TopTohScnal Posted April 1, 2017 Share Posted April 1, 2017 Yes I moved out here on my own (at 38), I think I found single life in the UK much easier as a lot of my friends were in the same boat , either separated, divorced or single, I have found so far that it's very family oriented here. I have joined lots of groups, outdoor stuff, biking etc, meet ups but it's still early days. I've not lived in the bigger cities, Sydney, Melbourne yet (I did 20 years ago as a backpacker but I guess it's changed, or I've changed) so can't say whether easier for singletons. I think it takes immense courage for anyone, either single, with a partner, with/without kids to up sticks, move all the way to the other side of the world and start all over again. I think good on you for doing it, whatever your reason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Collie Posted April 3, 2017 Share Posted April 3, 2017 On 1/21/2017 at 9:38 PM, Home and Happy said: Australia is geared towards family living. There's next to no vibrant pub, club or gig scene like we have back in UK. Its more of a "café" and restaurant sort of culture (which I like) As for nightlife, a street or two in Sydney CBD perhaps plus a rather seedy area (which you really do not want to visit) , a street in Melbourne, a few pubs together at the most in a small street in Perth and less in Adelaide. That's it. It's hardly the same as hitting the town in Newcastle, Leeds, Manchester, Birmingham or London. Way too conservative, that's why all the young ones love to come to UK, more fun and more buzz. . You need to get out more often - there is a whole world happending in these places (well Sydney & Melbourne) that you may not be aware of. Although the Sydney lock out laws have done their best to kill the nightlife in that city. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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