Reactions to moving to OZ?

[Richard01]

Hi everyone

Having visited Oz every couple of years, I "thought" it would be no great surprise that we would one day move there

My wife's family have been very supportive from day one (maybe they cannot wait to see the back of us!) However, friends have been a completely different story, this came to light over the last week as we sold our house and confirmed we were off in the summer, I was amazed that we had everything from- 'oh' to 'why do you want to move there' to being completely blanked

I would have thought it would be the opposite (friends supportive/ family in denial)

Was this your experience?

[CiderDrinkingCoder]

The wife and I are going through the process of informing folk we're scarpering permanently in January, at the moment.

This has very definitely not been my experience. Family-wise, everyone except the wife's mother is over the moon for us: we're all pretty much of a mind that dear old Blighty is up a creek.

As for the mates, a couple have already started planning for a big Christmas 2017 trip to visit us Down Under. Whether this materialises or not, at this point it's a nice thought. Knowing these swines, they won't leave once they get there...

I'm really sorry to hear that you've had such an unfortunate response from your friends. I'm sure there are other folk who have experienced this, and no doubt we'll find a few weird reactions in due course ourselves.

But, hey, it's probably little more than jealousy at the fact you're willing to spread your wings.

[Kezza37]

I'm 37 and my hubby is 36 and we have 2 kids aged 9 and 6 , we discussed emigrating a few years back but after the kids were born the idea took a back seat , only now have we felt it was the right time and actually financially this was probably the only time we could have managed to go . When we told our family , my Husbands side were fine , my Mum and brother were not great and still it's not a topic I discuss in front of them , even though we are now at the stage of just waiting for our visa to be granted !! My 2 best friends , one of them avoided me for a month she was so upset ,the other one is still in tears every time I see her but they are good now and talk about it more. I've only really had one negative reaction from a work friend who lived in Sydney 35 years ago ( we are going to Brisbane ) and gave me lots of negatives and pretty much patronised me by saying things like " you know it's not like on the tv , you won't be better off " we are well aware of this as my hubby is giving up being off shore and going back to his trade which will involve gap training and starting at the bottom. I'm a self employed hairdresser. It's gonna be a tough journey but we intend to grab the opportunity with both hands and run with it !!

[starlight7]

Hey-you will make plenty of new friends when you get here. If they have that attitude are they 'real' friends anyway?

[strayadreams]

I'm 37 and my hubby is 36 and we have 2 kids aged 9 and 6 , we discussed emigrating a few years back but after the kids were born the idea took a back seat , only now have we felt it was the right time and actually financially this was probably the only time we could have managed to go . When we told our family , my Husbands side were fine , my Mum and brother were not great and still it's not a topic I discuss in front of them , even though we are now at the stage of just waiting for our visa to be granted !! My 2 best friends , one of them avoided me for a month she was so upset ,the other one is still in tears every time I see her but they are good now and talk about it more. I've only really had one negative reaction from a work friend who lived in Sydney 35 years ago ( we are going to Brisbane ) and gave me lots of negatives and pretty much patronised me by saying things like " you know it's not like on the tv , you won't be better off " we are well aware of this as my hubby is giving up being off shore and going back to his trade which will involve gap training and starting at the bottom. I'm a self employed hairdresser. It's gonna be a tough journey but we intend to grab the opportunity with both hands and run with it !!

I still find it incredible that people feel they have the right to even say anything negative. When I tell people and they react badly I think that says more about them than my decision. Also when you've got children (we have 2, UK to Brisbane) it's a little offensive to suggest you haven't considered the move properly. You're going on an amazing adventure, enjoy it!!

 

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[Gbye grey sky]

Hi everyone

Having visited Oz every couple of years, I "thought" it would be no great surprise that we would one day move there

My wife's family have been very supportive from day one (maybe they cannot wait to see the back of us!) However, friends have been a completely different story, this came to light over the last week as we sold our house and confirmed we were off in the summer, I was amazed that we had everything from- 'oh' to 'why do you want to move there' to being completely blanked

I would have thought it would be the opposite (friends supportive/ family in denial)

Was this your experience?

 

When we are making all these plans it is very absorbing and we go through all those 'what the hell are we doing' thoughts. By the time we tell friends we have decided and plans are pretty much set in concrete. Family often have more notice and time to come to terms with the news. Tbh I expected shock, surprise and a certain amount of disappointment and got this. Don't think we were blanked by anyone though. One or two were jealous but most didn't get it and some still haven't. Lets face it, it is a bit of a mad thing to do really!

[Kezza37]

I still find it incredible that people feel they have the right to even say anything negative. When I tell people and they react badly I think that says more about them than my decision. Also when you've got children (we have 2, UK to Brisbane) it's a little offensive to suggest you haven't considered the move properly. You're going on an amazing adventure, enjoy it!!

 

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Thank you , just wish this visa would hurry up so we can get on with our plans .

[strayadreams]

Yes. My in laws said at the weekend it was unacceptable to not have a date for them. Like we're not desperate to have our visa granted!

 

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[Kezza37]

Yes. My in laws said at the weekend it was unacceptable to not have a date for them. Like we're not desperate to have our visa granted!

 

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I know , the waiting is just terrible , it's not been that long since we lodged so probably a long wait yet. We lodged round about 2nd February , assigned a CO a couple of weeks later then had our medicals and police checks sorted, I just tell everyone it could be 6 weeks , 6 months or even longer . How long you been waiting?

[strayadreams]

Yes. My in laws said at the weekend it was unacceptable to not have a date for them. Like we're not desperate to have our visa granted!

 

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I know , the waiting is just terrible , it's not been that long since we lodged so probably a long wait yet. We lodged round about 2nd February , assigned a CO a couple of weeks later then had our medicals and police checks sorted, I just tell everyone it could be 6 weeks , 6 months or even longer . How long you been waiting?

 

I've applied for a 457. My employer nomination was approved 3rd Feb, we were assigned a CO and then submitted our documentation 16th Feb so we are looking at another 2-4 weeks (if its straightforward). It does seem like forever though. My eldest (aged 13) had a school leaving party on Friday because we plan to leave during the Easter half term - but until the visa is granted there's nothing left to do except keep thinning out our belongings ready for shipping. I'm finding it difficult to focus on anything at all during this limbo stage!

[Kezza37]

 

I've applied for a 457. My employer nomination was approved 3rd Feb, we were assigned a CO and then submitted our documentation 16th Feb so we are looking at another 2-4 weeks (if its straightforward). It does seem like forever though. My eldest (aged 13) had a school leaving party on Friday because we plan to leave during the Easter half term - but until the visa is granted there's nothing left to do except keep thinning out our belongings ready for shipping. I'm finding it difficult to focus on anything at all during this limbo stage!

Fantastic!! Good luck with the move

[flag of convenience]

Hi everyone

Having visited Oz every couple of years, I "thought" it would be no great surprise that we would one day move there

My wife's family have been very supportive from day one (maybe they cannot wait to see the back of us!) However, friends have been a completely different story, this came to light over the last week as we sold our house and confirmed we were off in the summer, I was amazed that we had everything from- 'oh' to 'why do you want to move there' to being completely blanked

I would have thought it would be the opposite (friends supportive/ family in denial)

Was this your experience?

 

My opinion would be along the lines of, "Gosh you are brave' considering the circumstances unfolding in Australia of recent.

[Phoenix16]

You have the remember that for those you are leaving behind its kind of like a bereavement, for whilst your life changes so does there's, they have to adapt to the void you leave, it's a difficult one, there are no right and wrong answers, you will find those friends who keep in touch and those that just cut you out, it's their coping mechanism. I will give a warning about those that come and visit ha ha, this is your day to day life, but when friends / family arrive, it's their holiday! It can get complicated, I know friends here who save up their holidays to take it off and spend it with visitors, that's great for some, for us, we treasure our 'immediate' family holidays, that's when we get a proper rest. I love visitors but it quickly can get tedious when clearly they are arriving for an all inclusive holiday with full maid and chef service and you're trying to go to work and keep things normal, it's your normal life, particularly when you have lots of visitors at different times and you've only got your 4 weeks holidays! You become an accomplished host, tour guide, recreational planner, bus timetable expert, you're everything ha ha!!

[Kezza37]

You have the remember that for those you are leaving behind its kind of like a bereavement, for whilst your life changes so does there's, they have to adapt to the void you leave, it's a difficult one, there are no right and wrong answers, you will find those friends who keep in touch and those that just cut you out, it's their coping mechanism. I will give a warning about those that come and visit ha ha, this is your day to day life, but when friends / family arrive, it's their holiday! It can get complicated, I know friends here who save up their holidays to take it off and spend it with visitors, that's great for some, for us, we treasure our 'immediate' family holidays, that's when we get a proper rest. I love visitors but it quickly can get tedious when clearly they are arriving for an all inclusive holiday with full maid and chef service and you're trying to go to work and keep things normal, it's your normal life, particularly when you have lots of visitors at different times and you've only got your 4 weeks holidays! You become an accomplished host, tour guide, recreational planner, bus timetable expert, you're everything ha ha!!

 

Lol, I will keep that in mind . Probably introduce them all to Airbnb instead, hahah

[Richard01]

My opinion would be along the lines of, "Gosh you are brave' considering the circumstances unfolding in Australia of recent.

 

In which respect? Economy?

[tea4too]

You have the remember that for those you are leaving behind its kind of like a bereavement, for whilst your life changes so does there's, they have to adapt to the void you leave, it's a difficult one, there are no right and wrong answers, you will find those friends who keep in touch and those that just cut you out, it's their coping mechanism. I will give a warning about those that come and visit ha ha, this is your day to day life, but when friends / family arrive, it's their holiday! It can get complicated, I know friends here who save up their holidays to take it off and spend it with visitors, that's great for some, for us, we treasure our 'immediate' family holidays, that's when we get a proper rest. I love visitors but it quickly can get tedious when clearly they are arriving for an all inclusive holiday with full maid and chef service and you're trying to go to work and keep things normal, it's your normal life, particularly when you have lots of visitors at different times and you've only got your 4 weeks holidays! You become an accomplished host, tour guide, recreational planner, bus timetable expert, you're everything ha ha!!

 

 

Great post @Jessie123. When visiting family in Aus we tend to book our own place, plan our days and invite family to come along if they can or want to. It works well as we mostly catch up at the weekends or they come round to us for evening meals – a nice break for them and a novelty for us.

@downunder2016 - the reaction of friends is an interesting one. We noticed from our very first visit to Aus that people assumed we would see life through their eyes and be desperate to emigrate too. That has never been the case but some people find it very hard to believe we might actually be happy with the life we have in the UK and there have been some awkward moments. I have no doubt that at least one woman I met at a barbecue in W.A went home reassuring herself I must be was jealous of her lifestyle as I couldn’t possibly prefer the rain and green fields of Wales, could I ?!

 

Be happy with your choices, be excited and optimistic about your future, but maybe don’t assume everyone will share or even understand your reasons for moving…..not saying you have intentionally done that, just saying that we are all different. T x

[Phoenix16]

Great post @Jessie123. When visiting family in Aus we tend to book our own place, plan our days and invite family to come along if they can or want to. It works well as we mostly catch up at the weekends or they come round to us for evening meals – a nice break for them and a novelty for us.

@downunder2016 - the reaction of friends is an interesting one. We noticed from our very first visit to Aus that people assumed we would see life through their eyes and be desperate to emigrate too. That has never been the case but some people find it very hard to believe we might actually be happy with the life we have in the UK and there have been some awkward moments. I have no doubt that at least one woman I met at a barbecue in W.A went home reassuring herself I must be was jealous of her lifestyle as I couldn’t possibly prefer the rain and green fields of Wales, could I ?!

 

Be happy with your choices, be excited and optimistic about your future, but maybe don’t assume everyone will share or even understand your reasons for moving…..not saying you have intentionally done that, just saying that we are all different. T x

 

So lovely and interesting to hear the other side! i can totally identify with your comments, we forget over here that not everyone wants this lifestyle, I've met people like you describe and I can empathise totally! You would be the perfect guests with your balance and perspective, can we refer our prospective visitors for a workshop with you before they get on the plane ha ha!!

[stevej]

We are not anticipating much interest when we an once the move. We have been on about moving for many years, but finally doing something about it. The wife's parents we only see maybe once or twice a year, and only if we visit them. My father hasn't visited us once in the 13years we have been married and we don't really talk( his new wife is all he is botherd about now days). My mother we see every couple of weeks but she is so supportive in the move. The not person who would be bothered is my 90 year old grandmother who basically raised me until 10 years old. She will not take it well but also will put on a brave face I think. We just are not a close nit family I guess. My wife has a best friend who although she lives 100 miles away they speak every day, that will be tough for her. My best friend we don't speak for years but then pick up from where we left off so don't think there is an issue there. It is such a complicated thing to predict I guess. Time will tell for us as we are only at the beginning of the journey.

[Richard01]

We are not anticipating much interest when we an once the move. We have been on about moving for many years, but finally doing something about it. The wife's parents we only see maybe once or twice a year, and only if we visit them. My father hasn't visited us once in the 13years we have been married and we don't really talk( his new wife is all he is botherd about now days). My mother we see every couple of weeks but she is so supportive in the move. The not person who would be bothered is my 90 year old grandmother who basically raised me until 10 years old. She will not take it well but also will put on a brave face I think. We just are not a close nit family I guess. My wife has a best friend who although she lives 100 miles away they speak every day, that will be tough for her. My best friend we don't speak for years but then pick up from where we left off so don't think there is an issue there. It is such a complicated thing to predict I guess. Time will tell for us as we are only at the beginning of the journey.

 

Wow Steve, I could have have sworn my wife wrote this! Circumstances are TOO similar!

[flag of convenience]

In which respect? Economy?

 

Sorry it was a bit tongue in cheek and don't usually comment on such things to potential newcomers, but yes the economy. I've of course no idea of your personal circumstance as to the reasons moving or what you have lined up on arrival here, but if it was me, I'd tread with caution.

We have undergone substantial changes in Australia over recent times and worth checking out the potential advantages over disadvantages over how things are now and likely to be in the future rather than the past when it was a far easier ride.

 

As for people's opinions they will vary. From the almost accusation of being treacherous to the well at least we'll have a place in the sun to take the occasional holiday type scenario.

Edited March 15, 2016 by flag of convenience