Torn between family/ friends and life in the sun

[bunbury61]

The age old dilemma:

Loving life in the sun, but missing family and 'old friends'...

 

We moved to the Gold Coast, from leafy Wiltshire, almost 4 years ago. I'm a GP, my husband is at home and looks after our 3 children, currently 13, 7 and 4. We live in a beautiful house with a pool, and a boat, and the kids all go to a great private school. I also enjoy my work much more in Australia, compared with the NHS in England, for many reasons. I would struggle to go back and work in the NHS, although I do have a great belief in the principle of the NHS and free health care for all, I would struggle with how it is managed currently. Generally speaking though, life should be great.

 

The difficulty is, we have a wonderful life here, but no one to share it with...

 

My 2 eldest (girls) are wanting to go back to England, mainly because they miss their grandparents, cousins and friends. We miss the company, the love, the feeling of belonging with family. I feel guilty that my children are growing up without that valuable time with their grandparents, aunts and uncles, and the fun of spending time with their cousins. And of course, the family in UK are also missing out on our 3's childhoods. The longer we leave it, the more 'distant' we will become from our family. I feel selfish for staying here, predominantly because work is more rewarding, and because of our lifestyle.

 

Other things I miss about England: There's so many things to do, culture, history, Europe, 'genuine' people, courteous drivers, old friends who you can reminisce with, the countryside, and houses that are built for all weather (having had a cold winter - I've gone soft) with central heating and double glazing! I love the Gold Coast, for the weather and the stunning beaches, but I find it shallow, superficial and actually a bit boring. But then, I'm not particularly into sports, or watching sports.

 

We have made 2 trips back to the UK since we emigrated. The first one was for Xmas a couple of years ago. Xmas here is not really Xmas! Especially when you have absolutely no family here. It was cold, wet and dark, and we could not wait to get back to the Gold Coast! The 2nd trip was recently, for 3 weeks in June/ July. The weather was fabulous, the evenings were amazing (it's funny how you forget so quickly about it not getting dark until 10.30 at night!), and it was lovely not to get eaten alive by midges! It was heartwarmingly wonderful to see the family, and to watch our kids have fun and share love with the family again. I didn't want to come back to Australia this time!

 

Have started looking at schools near our UK family, and am also spending an unhealthy amount of time on Rightmove! But know that if we were to move back, we would miss the sunshine, the warmth, and I would miss my job. And we couldn't afford to send 3 kids to private school in England, it's much more achievable out here. I couldn't go straight back into being a GP again, as I have been out of England for more than 2 years, and would have to have a period of induction and ?retraining. The morale in the NHS seems so low at the moment, I'm not even sure I would want to. But I would have to find some sort of job pretty quickly to support our family.

The smaller house, no pool/ boat doesn't bother me. The endless rain might though. Have been hearing what a washout the school summer holidays have been.

 

We plan to stay here until we get citizenship, which should be in the next 6-12 months hopefully. At least that way, we can always come back if we realise that we have made a huge mistake.

 

But right now, I am desperately missing family, and close friends. I know the red carpet treatment on our return will not last forever, but I also know that our family will welcome us back with open arms. Of course, if I could persuade them all to move over here, I would probably try. But that will never happen.

 

Would love to hear from anyone else going through the same. Emotions are all over the place at the moment.

 

:ssign16:

 

 

Oh dear .....thats exactly what we did .....if you have the lifestyle there in oz ....spend your holiday time back in the u.k and Europe

..but don't move

 

We got caught up in the heart ruling the head scenario ,20 years ago .

A lot of the things you miss ,are memories ,that's all .

Some of the people you miss will have moved on

 

Iam here because my mom is still alive ....plus I get to Europe ,and that's bloody fantastic .

 

Should I have been more selfish and ruthless ...yes

 

Am I glad I came back ...on the whole ...yes ...because I have a job to do ,keep an eye on my mom...

 

You cannot buy that back

[jodipodi]

Good advice from Diane there. You really have to ponder over those bite sized pieces rather than overwhelm yourself with the whole picture, although it seems that you have broken it down in your post.

 

I have to say, and likely many will disagree, that life does revolve around work. I agree with the work to live not live to work adage but the truth is, you spend nigh on a third of your life at work and if you're thinking that you may be unhappy in a paticular workplace, then you will be unhapphy for far longer than a third because it's ihighly likely that the unhappiness will be brought home.

 

I was in Wiltshire at the same time as you wuith a view/recce as to whether return was possible. I have an older son living in Salisbury and I mis him and his kids/my grandchildren, enormously

 

I'm a single parent with 2 young adults at home, one (Jake) of whom is autistic. He has a good job though working as an aide at the school that he went to as a child, and the other son works at Maccas part time and is also at UNI. They too were thinking about life back in the Uk as they too miss their bothers and the rest of the family there. They also love the history/culture/landscape etc.

 

On our return, we had a long chat and looked at all the individual pros and cons.........starting over, expense and lower pension for me, work, study etc. We agreed that the liklihood of Jake finding similar employment and being happy in it, were slim, as he loves his job here. Josh doesn't seem too bothered either way. In the end, it all came down to Jake's work situation so here we stay.

 

I understand where you're coming from with the NHS, and although it's 20 yrs agao for us, my wife at the time, being a clinical nurse, was the driver to move here. She felt that she couldn't nurse as she should be able to in the NHS and has been extremely happy with her role here and said that she could never return to the NHS. I know that most folk think the NHS service is wonderful but IME the vast majority of it's employees think otherwise which is illustrated by the high number of nurses who move here.

 

Good luck with whatever you decide

 

Such a wise and very realistic take on it....I agree with it all....especially the job part. It's a massive part of anyone's life and to be happy in ones work is magic....like the saying goes, find a job you love and you'll never work another day in your life.

 

To the OP.... I can't help as I'm not in the position you are at the moment but I really think Johndoe has some very good points to consider.

All the very best of luck xx

[docboat]

Agreed with all of the advice. But, speaking as a doctor, I would rather have my testicles removed with hot tongs than work again in the NHS, under any conditions, ever again. If it is a matter of family, and if you have the ability to work less full time, then I would strongly urge you to take longer holidays in UK, explore Europe, enjoy family and friends in bursts of pleasure, rather than as interludes while slaving within the NHS

[jumpingjellybean]

I love the Gold Coast, for the weather and the stunning beaches, but I find it shallow, superficial and actually a bit boring.

 

That pretty much seems up the Gold Coast for me.

 

That is why I don't live there.

 

Why don't you move to somewhere else in Australia, equally as nice in regards to weather and stunning beaches..........but without the shallowness, superficiality and boring bits.

 

Yes good idea about the Citizenship bit : "we plan to stay here until we get citizenship, which should be in the next 6-12 months hopefully. At least that way, we can always come back if we realise that we have made a huge mistake".

 

Yes the red carpet treatment on your return will not last forever. Before you know it you will be back to the humdrum of normal every day living. And then what? You may find yourself thinking and feeling exactly how you felt before you first moved to Australia in the first place.

 

In the end only you can decide.

[jumpingjellybean]

Who wants to be lonely in paradise?!

 

Actually I would rather be lonely in paradise (in Australia) in a place I love and am happy in.

Than back in the UK surrounded by family and friends in a town I detested and could not wait to leave.

[Keith and Linda]

Agreed with all of the advice. But, speaking as a doctor, I would rather have my testicles removed with hot tongs than work again in the NHS, under any conditions, ever again. If it is a matter of family, and if you have the ability to work less full time, then I would strongly urge you to take longer holidays in UK, explore Europe, enjoy family and friends in bursts of pleasure, rather than as interludes while slaving within the NHS

 

Isn't that the way they do it anyhow?

[docboat]

 

Isn't that the way they do it anyhow?

 

Private or public?

[Emma2]

The age old dilemma:

Loving life in the sun, but missing family and 'old friends'...

 

We moved to the Gold Coast, from leafy Wiltshire, almost 4 years ago. I'm a GP, my husband is at home and looks after our 3 children, currently 13, 7 and 4. We live in a beautiful house with a pool, and a boat, and the kids all go to a great private school. I also enjoy my work much more in Australia, compared with the NHS in England, for many reasons. I would struggle to go back and work in the NHS, although I do have a great belief in the principle of the NHS and free health care for all, I would struggle with how it is managed currently. Generally speaking though, life should be great.

 

The difficulty is, we have a wonderful life here, but no one to share it with...

 

My 2 eldest (girls) are wanting to go back to England, mainly because they miss their grandparents, cousins and friends. We miss the company, the love, the feeling of belonging with family. I feel guilty that my children are growing up without that valuable time with their grandparents, aunts and uncles, and the fun of spending time with their cousins. And of course, the family in UK are also missing out on our 3's childhoods. The longer we leave it, the more 'distant' we will become from our family. I feel selfish for staying here, predominantly because work is more rewarding, and because of our lifestyle.

 

Other things I miss about England: There's so many things to do, culture, history, Europe, 'genuine' people, courteous drivers, old friends who you can reminisce with, the countryside, and houses that are built for all weather (having had a cold winter - I've gone soft) with central heating and double glazing! I love the Gold Coast, for the weather and the stunning beaches, but I find it shallow, superficial and actually a bit boring. But then, I'm not particularly into sports, or watching sports.

 

We have made 2 trips back to the UK since we emigrated. The first one was for Xmas a couple of years ago. Xmas here is not really Xmas! Especially when you have absolutely no family here. It was cold, wet and dark, and we could not wait to get back to the Gold Coast! The 2nd trip was recently, for 3 weeks in June/ July. The weather was fabulous, the evenings were amazing (it's funny how you forget so quickly about it not getting dark until 10.30 at night!), and it was lovely not to get eaten alive by midges! It was heartwarmingly wonderful to see the family, and to watch our kids have fun and share love with the family again. I didn't want to come back to Australia this time!

 

Have started looking at schools near our UK family, and am also spending an unhealthy amount of time on Rightmove! But know that if we were to move back, we would miss the sunshine, the warmth, and I would miss my job. And we couldn't afford to send 3 kids to private school in England, it's much more achievable out here. I couldn't go straight back into being a GP again, as I have been out of England for more than 2 years, and would have to have a period of induction and ?retraining. The morale in the NHS seems so low at the moment, I'm not even sure I would want to. But I would have to find some sort of job pretty quickly to support our family.

The smaller house, no pool/ boat doesn't bother me. The endless rain might though. Have been hearing what a washout the school summer holidays have been.

 

We plan to stay here until we get citizenship, which should be in the next 6-12 months hopefully. At least that way, we can always come back if we realise that we have made a huge mistake.

 

But right now, I am desperately missing family, and close friends. I know the red carpet treatment on our return will not last forever, but I also know that our family will welcome us back with open arms. Of course, if I could persuade them all to move over here, I would probably try. But that will never happen.

 

Would love to hear from anyone else going through the same. Emotions are all over the place at the moment.

 

:ssign16:

I could have written this! This is exactly how I feel! We're making the move back in December. It's actually my husband who is the GP in our family and I have to say that the whole returners scheme is driving us mad and seems utterly ridiculous but if you time your return around the exam/simulated surgery then hopefully you wouldn't have to spend too long on a low income. Unfortunately we only worked that one out after we had booked our flights home!! I do worry about missing the weather but to be honest I find it far too hot here in the summer anyway and the fact that incomes are much lower in the uk is also hard but money isn't everything. I can't wait to be back near my family (my 9 year old can't wait to be near his grandparents again) and be around like minded people. I know people will disagree with my thoughts but we're all different and whats right for one person is not necessarily right for another. you have to go with your heart.

 

Emma x

[kiwiathome]

I have to say it is so clear, you want to go home. People always matter more over "sun", "money" "effort of change" etc. Look deep, is Australia really your home?

 

Sometimes we get a little bit scared and caught up in the practical aspect over facts, rather than look deep down and think what really matters, and what really do we want. Fair enough.

 

But I don't think it will ever change. It does not have to be a life sentence if you move back to UK. You can always move again in 7 years time, if that is what you want. Life is always

evolving, situations and circumstances constantly change. Our kids get older, we get wiser, our parents age.

 

Make the best decision you can at the time, on the current situation. You sound like you want to go back to UK. And maybe it will never get better here for you, so is this time wasted?

 

As many would know here, I have been here for 7 years. Hate it, still do. But we are finally going back to NZ, on the way to UK. Need to take care of 3 grandparents in the meantime.

 

I have lived in many countries, and love travelling, but have never settled in Australia. Sometimes you need to look forward and move. Don't feel judged, just trust your instinct. Then

factor in the logical.

 

We all feel muddled in our head at times, feel judged, feel rushed or that all is too hard. It isn't, just stop and listen to your gut for once. All the best. x.

[jumpingjellybean]

I know people will disagree with my thoughts but we're all different and whats right for one person is not necessarily right for another. you have to go with your heart.

 

Yes I agree.

 

Each to their own; as I always say.

 

Personally moving back to the UK is my worst nightmare (I mean that literally - I still have occasional nightmares about it)

[jumpingjellybean]

As many would know here, I have been here for 7 years. Hate it, still do.

 

I don't know!

If you have hated it for so long......why are you still here?

Why not move long before now?

@ confused!

[bristolman]

I know people will disagree with my thoughts but we're all different and whats right for one person is not necessarily right for another. you have to go with your heart.

 

Emma x

 

That's is absolutely right, I can't imagine what would get us back to Australia to be honest, we don dislike it by any means but none of us want to go back, including our 2 Aussie born kids. We haven't missed the weather at all, sometimes in the depths of winter you might wish the weather was better but the worst of it doesn't last long and to be honest we found the heat far harder to cope with. We ae a bit better off financially here which is a bonus but not what we came here for.

[bristolman]

Yes I agree.

 

Each to their own; as I always say.

 

Personally moving back to the UK is my worst nightmare (I mean that literally - I still have occasional nightmares about it)

 

That's awful but I have to ask what on earth could give you nightmares ?

[bristolman]

Yes I agree.

 

Each to their own; as I always say.

 

Personally moving back to the UK is my worst nightmare (I mean that literally - I still have occasional nightmares about it)

 

Just as an aside this is the Moving Back to the UK section so for your sanity and sleep patterns might be best avoided lol

[Chortlepuss]

 

I have lived in many countries, and love travelling, but have never settled in Australia. Sometimes you need to look forward and move. Don't feel judged, just trust your instinct. Then

factor in the logical.

 

We all feel muddled in our head at times, feel judged, feel rushed or that all is too hard. It isn't, just stop and listen to your gut for once. All the best. x.

 

You could always try the lotto test - If I won the lotto where would I go? For me, it would be straight on a flight home to see my friends and family, walk along a cold pebbly beach and pop down the pub for a decent beer - No dreams of buying a fancy pad near an Ozzie beach. What would be the point?

[BacktoDemocracy]

After 9 years here, we are planning to head back to the UK next year. The weather is lovely for most of the year here in Brisbane and I'm sure we will miss it. We have good jobs but I miss family, friends, community, culture and travel. We rent a lovely house here but apart from the occasional visitor it is empty. When we've had visitors from the UK I'm aware of just how good life could be here if it was possible to meet like minded people and have a great circle of friends. I am sure people look at the pics of our glorious pool and think we're living some kind of charmed life. Meanwhile I am envious of the parties and communal activity in the UK! I was really touched by a comment from someone in this forum some time ago, who despite having a good life in Sydney said something along the lines of 'I would rather walk through the rain to see my mates in the pub than sit alone on a beautiful beach' It really resonated with me. My daughter is a nurse and for her it makes sense to stay here - she is paid well (much better than UK) and according to British nursing colleagues has an easier time of it. My GP tells me her life is much easier here than in London. So it is a difficult choice for you. IT (my job) is pretty much the same. I am pretty independent and have never been much into socialising. I struggle with the endless small talk here. Like access to great shops and cheap Mediterranean breaks, you don't know what you've got till it's gone and I long for a life where a friend pops in for a cuppa, or we all get together for an impromptu party, Even a walk to the pub. I'm in a great place in my head now because I know that I'm heading back. But any thought of retiring here with the endless isolation it would bring scares me silly.

I agree with everything you say, all the reasons why we came back, but the weather is a real downer and the price of housing is a real problem, the NHS is in a real state, which in my opinion is being created by the tories as a pre cursor to starting to incrementally privatise it and this little island is gravely crowded.

I would really think hard before coming back, in retrospect I think I should have made more effort to make oz work by moving to a more cosmopolitan area rather than sticking with Brisbane which is still thought of as whoop whoop land by many southerners.

[Maviisdavis0405]

Hello

 

Its almost like i have written this. My emotions swing back and forth daily. We moved to toowoomba almost three years ago. My husband works in renal at the local hospital. We have a 15 year old daughter. We have a great lifestyle our daughter has a great education. I cannot 100% enjoy it as i am not sharing it with all the people i love the most. I too feel soo guilty for moving so far away. Ita tough not seeing nieces and nephews grow up. We miss our family immensely. I even find it tough calling them or skyping as we all leave the conversations feeling sad. We have a better life in australia. We are currently building a new home have met wonderful people also who invite us for christmas but as you mentioned it does not feel like christmas and is not celebrated like back home.

If you ever feel like a chat please message me .

Its a horrible feeling

 

Jo

 

The age old dilemma:

Loving life in the sun, but missing family and 'old friends'...

 

We moved to the Gold Coast, from leafy Wiltshire, almost 4 years ago. I'm a GP, my husband is at home and looks after our 3 children, currently 13, 7 and 4. We live in a beautiful house with a pool, and a boat, and the kids all go to a great private school. I also enjoy my work much more in Australia, compared with the NHS in England, for many reasons. I would struggle to go back and work in the NHS, although I do have a great belief in the principle of the NHS and free health care for all, I would struggle with how it is managed currently. Generally speaking though, life should be great.

 

The difficulty is, we have a wonderful life here, but no one to share it with...

 

My 2 eldest (girls) are wanting to go back to England, mainly because they miss their grandparents, cousins and friends. We miss the company, the love, the feeling of belonging with family. I feel guilty that my children are growing up without that valuable time with their grandparents, aunts and uncles, and the fun of spending time with their cousins. And of course, the family in UK are also missing out on our 3's childhoods. The longer we leave it, the more 'distant' we will become from our family. I feel selfish for staying here, predominantly because work is more rewarding, and because of our lifestyle.

 

Other things I miss about England: There's so many things to do, culture, history, Europe, 'genuine' people, courteous drivers, old friends who you can reminisce with, the countryside, and houses that are built for all weather (having had a cold winter - I've gone soft) with central heating and double glazing! I love the Gold Coast, for the weather and the stunning beaches, but I find it shallow, superficial and actually a bit boring. But then, I'm not particularly into sports, or watching sports.

 

We have made 2 trips back to the UK since we emigrated. The first one was for Xmas a couple of years ago. Xmas here is not really Xmas! Especially when you have absolutely no family here. It was cold, wet and dark, and we could not wait to get back to the Gold Coast! The 2nd trip was recently, for 3 weeks in June/ July. The weather was fabulous, the evenings were amazing (it's funny how you forget so quickly about it not getting dark until 10.30 at night!), and it was lovely not to get eaten alive by midges! It was heartwarmingly wonderful to see the family, and to watch our kids have fun and share love with the family again. I didn't want to come back to Australia this time!

 

Have started looking at schools near our UK family, and am also spending an unhealthy amount of time on Rightmove! But know that if we were to move back, we would miss the sunshine, the warmth, and I would miss my job. And we couldn't afford to send 3 kids to private school in England, it's much more achievable out here. I couldn't go straight back into being a GP again, as I have been out of England for more than 2 years, and would have to have a period of induction and ?retraining. The morale in the NHS seems so low at the moment, I'm not even sure I would want to. But I would have to find some sort of job pretty quickly to support our family.

The smaller house, no pool/ boat doesn't bother me. The endless rain might though. Have been hearing what a washout the school summer holidays have been.

 

We plan to stay here until we get citizenship, which should be in the next 6-12 months hopefully. At least that way, we can always come back if we realise that we have made a huge mistake.

 

But right now, I am desperately missing family, and close friends. I know the red carpet treatment on our return will not last forever, but I also know that our family will welcome us back with open arms. Of course, if I could persuade them all to move over here, I would probably try. But that will never happen.

 

Would love to hear from anyone else going through the same. Emotions are all over the place at the moment.

 

:ssign16:

[Johndoe]

I wonder just how much time those folk who say that they miss family actually spent with family when they were in the UK? One ping ponger that I know who loved Oz, went back because she missed family. It was only when she had been back a while that she realised that she only ever saw them on Birthdays and Xmas. She said that she thought she had sacrificed 365 days of a better standard of living and the rest of the things that she loved about Oz, for no more than 7 days of family get togethers.

[jumpingjellybean]

That's awful but I have to ask what on earth could give you nightmares ?

 

The first time I traveled to Australia I fell in love with the country. That was on a WHV. And I cried my eyes out on the day my WHV expired and I had to return to the UK. I still remember how depressed I was that first morning I woke up back in the UK after returning from my travels. Occasionally to this day I will have a bad dream / nightmare where I dream I am waking up in the UK again repeating that morning feeling. It is difficult for me to explain. But for a few minutes just before I wake up I will yell out or cry thinking it is real. And when I do wake up and realize I am safe and sound in my bedroom in Australia, I feel an amazing sense of gratitude and I thank god it was only a dream.

 

I would absolutely hate to live in the UK again and would be terribly depressed if I had to leave Australia permanently. I absolutely LOVE Australia and sometimes still to this day, I will be walking along the street and suddenly think to myself how lucky I am to be given residency and then citizenship and still sometimes cannot quite believe I am really here. All my family and friends are in the UK. But I don't miss them at all. I would rather be "lonely" in a country that I love living in. Then be surrounded by family and friends in the UK where I was mainly unhappy in the town where I grew up. If I did ever return to the UK I could not go back to that town; so I would end up living away from family and friends anyway.

[jumpingjellybean]

Just as an aside this is the Moving Back to the UK section so for your sanity and sleep patterns might be best avoided lol

 

Opps - I didn't realize I was in that section :laugh: not a place I would normally venture.

[Hoddie32]

Hi,

 

I'm new to the forum and just looking for some advice or similar stories to help me out. I originally moved to Melbourne from leafy Surrey in September 2013, so it's been about two years. I moved originally to travel and see how things worked out with my boyfriend who I had met in June 2013 whilst travelling the USA. I've done my WHV and my farm work and we've applied for our partner 820 visa in April this year. Work has been difficult to find due to visa restrictions and its pretty much just been temps jobs and call centre jobs, whilst my partner is a firefighter.

 

I've had issues over the past year with depression and anxiety and am starting to think maybe it is just homesickness and I should move back to the UK. I love my partner and we have a good life here with good wages, opportunity to travel and good weather, but I've always been a home loving girl and miss the family cuddles and chats. I try to Skype regularly and have been back to visit 3 times already with my parents having just left after a two week visit. Every time I leave the UK or they leave oz I am hugely homesick.

 

I am so confused as to whether this is homesickness, separation anxiety or depression. I feel anxious and down a lot of the time but am not sure whether this is just homesickness or something more. I have considered moving back to the UK but with my partner having an established career here I think he would find it hard. He said he is willing to try for a few months. But then there's the visa issue, our partner visa can take 12-15 months to process. Do i stick it out here for a few years and get my citizenship or go back home and give up on Australia and possibly my relationship. I guess I'm just looking for people in a similar situation to talk to as I'm feeling pretty lonely and lost.

 

Its difficult deciding whether this is homesickness, anxiety, depression or just a case of the grass always being greener on the other side.

 

If you've stuck with me through my rambling, then thank you. I don't expect psychologist grade replies, just someone to talk to and understand me.

 

thanks

[Tina2]

Been here 40 years now. Am kicking myself for not going back when I had the chance. Now for difficult reasons there is no hope of ever going back. Having now retired it is really hitting home. There is simply nothing to do. In the UK transport is way beyond what it is here. You can catch a bus to no end of historical places. Walk to the village to pick up a few things and have a chat with friends. I guess it is harder for us as we don't live in the center of a capital city (not that we would want to) but it is expencive to travel anywhere. Health care is SO expencive and if you don't have the money well tough you go with out, well unless you sit on a public wait list for years and years.

If you are that unsettled and have the chance to go home, then go while you can. Don't wait till for what ever reason you can no longer go back. The pain of wanting to "go home" but knowing you cant is really hard to live with.

[bristolman]

The first time I traveled to Australia I fell in love with the country. That was on a WHV. And I cried my eyes out on the day my WHV expired and I had to return to the UK. I still remember how depressed I was that first morning I woke up back in the UK after returning from my travels. Occasionally to this day I will have a bad dream / nightmare where I dream I am waking up in the UK again repeating that morning feeling. It is difficult for me to explain. But for a few minutes just before I wake up I will yell out or cry thinking it is real. And when I do wake up and realize I am safe and sound in my bedroom in Australia, I feel an amazing sense of gratitude and I thank god it was only a dream.

 

I would absolutely hate to live in the UK again and would be terribly depressed if I had to leave Australia permanently. I absolutely LOVE Australia and sometimes still to this day, I will be walking along the street and suddenly think to myself how lucky I am to be given residency and then citizenship and still sometimes cannot quite believe I am really here. All my family and friends are in the UK. But I don't miss them at all. I would rather be "lonely" in a country that I love living in. Then be surrounded by family and friends in the UK where I was mainly unhappy in the town where I grew up. If I did ever return to the UK I could not go back to that town; so I would end up living away from family and friends anyway.

 

That's awful. I suppose there are a few places in the UK that would give me nightmares. It does sound as though memories from your hometown have unfortunately made you feel this way which is a shame. I would hate to feel that way about this beautiful country.

[bristolman]

I agree with everything you say, all the reasons why we came back, but the weather is a real downer and the price of housing is a real problem, the NHS is in a real state, which in my opinion is being created by the tories as a pre cursor to starting to incrementally privatise it and this little island is gravely crowded.

I would really think hard before coming back, in retrospect I think I should have made more effort to make oz work by moving to a more cosmopolitan area rather than sticking with Brisbane which is still thought of as whoop whoop land by many southerners.

 

The only part I agree with is think hard before coming back, that applies to any move of course.

We don't find the weather a downer at, we still do more things here. Complaining about the price of housing seems odd considering the crazy prices in Australia, we now have a bigger house on a bigger block of land than we had in Australia.

We have had fantastic service from all aspects of the NHS since being back. The only problems we have ever had over the years were when I was released from hospital after an operation with the wound still bleeding quite heavily, the answer was to put more bandages on it. The other time was when our son broke his arm, he lay on a bed in a corridor for hours before being seen and he was 6 years old, then his operation was delayed by 24 hours.

We live in the least populated are in England, a traffic jam is 3 cars and a tractor.

[Jacaranda]

The first time I traveled to Australia I fell in love with the country. That was on a WHV. And I cried my eyes out on the day my WHV expired and I had to return to the UK. I still remember how depressed I was that first morning I woke up back in the UK after returning from my travels. Occasionally to this day I will have a bad dream / nightmare where I dream I am waking up in the UK again repeating that morning feeling. It is difficult for me to explain. But for a few minutes just before I wake up I will yell out or cry thinking it is real. And when I do wake up and realize I am safe and sound in my bedroom in Australia, I feel an amazing sense of gratitude and I thank god it was only a dream.

 

I would absolutely hate to live in the UK again and would be terribly depressed if I had to leave Australia permanently. I absolutely LOVE Australia and sometimes still to this day, I will be walking along the street and suddenly think to myself how lucky I am to be given residency and then citizenship and still sometimes cannot quite believe I am really here. All my family and friends are in the UK. But I don't miss them at all. I would rather be "lonely" in a country that I love living in. Then be surrounded by family and friends in the UK where I was mainly unhappy in the town where I grew up. If I did ever return to the UK I could not go back to that town; so I would end up living away from family and friends anyway.

Wow?Where did you come from in the UK JJB?I enjoy living in both countries,but can see the good bad and ugly in both.When I first got married in Sth Oz,we moved to a not so pretty suburb because at that time,its all we could afford.To this day,when I remember our time there (and this was years ago)I actually cringe and thank god we got the hell out of that place.Its the only time in my whole life (and I've moved around a lot!)that I've felt that way about a place,so yeah can sort of understand how you feel.I actually drove my british OH (now ex)around that burb a few years ago because he refused to believe such a place existed in Australia.Needless to say he was shocked.My only saving grace on that particular move was it allowed us then to upgrade to a much better place and house,and for that I will always be grateful.