Stay or go Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Hi all, I could do with some advice, I am new here. so...my husband has been offered a job in melbourne. The salary is good, we get a free company car, all flights and shipping is covered, and visas will be sorted (and paid for) for us. We are currently in the uk, own a lovely family home (albeit not in the best areas for schools) and have two young children, 3 and 9months. We have family fairly close by, although don't see them that much and don't receive any help with childcare etc. i am completely torn, and have no idea what to do. The job is initially for two years but apparently we could return after 6 months if we don't settle, or stay longer if we do. this is not really something we have ever considered so has all come out of the blue and i am totally confused. Would we be crazy not to try it, or is it a massive upheaval for a short period of I time (I wouldn't want to stay more than two years)? Our eldest would have to start school while there although would only be there for a year before we returned home, he's a sensitive chap and I know he would struggle to adapt initially. Help..........! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 If it's short term, your kids are young so it looks like a nice adventure. Unless it means your DH packing in a good job with questionable employment on return what do you have to lose? Rent out the house and come to some agreement with the DH that if you don't love it he will leave (and vice versa) and it should be a doddle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxlornaxx Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 I vote for going...would u look back in yrs to come and think 'if only'?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 I agree with Quoll - look on it as a temporary adventure and enjoy it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob64 Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 I would stay in the UK ! It is not worth all the upheaval. I enjoyed my 3 1/2 years there but it's not what it's cracked up to be ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chortlepuss Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 As long as you're not burning any bridges and your hubby can return to a UK job I think it would be great to give it a go for a couple of years. Little risk and it's rarely that easy to try life in another country! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerryDXB Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 The biggest issue most families face is tying in the kids education with where you are likely to be when they reach secondary school age - this isn't a problem for you as the age of your kids means that they are pretty adaptable anyway. When you look at other posts in these forums, about the cost and effort some people have to go to to get to Oz, you will see that you have a golden and almost a 'one off' opportunity to live in a foreign country (OK, so the words they use are similar, but it is definitely foreign) with little or no risk or cost to yourselves. As long as you make 100% sure that all the things you described are built into a cast iron contract, then you can't really go wrong. You might get to Oz and not like it - at least you'll know. One thing's for sure, whether you go and stay, or go and come back, and no matter how you end up feeling about Oz, the overall experience will be good for you and your family - if you come back after 6 months or 2 years, your life will have been changed for the better and you will certainly appreciate the UK a lot more. FWIW, I'm with Rob64 - its not all its cracked up to be, but I have no regrets at having gone there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacaranda Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Do you both genuinely "want" to live in Australia,or could this opportunity be anywhere in the world ,and you'd be asking the same questions?What kind of visa's are the company offering?Where in Melbourne would you be living?Have you the funds to furnish a new place?Including everything from bed linen,crockery to bigger items like white goods and furniture?(These are questions you should be asking yourselves btw,I don't need to know the answers!lol ).Are you planning to work?If so have you looked at childcare costs? What happens for example if your OH loves it and wants to stay and you don't?Or visa versa?I personally would not burn all my bridges.Keep your house and ask OH if he could take a sabbatical from work. Don't torture yourself with thoughts of "What if"Make a decision either way on what you are feeling today.Not what you'll be feeling in 5 yrs time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 As someone who was sponsored to go to Australia and returned after 5 years because we preferred our UK lifestyle I'd agree with everyone else and say 'go for it' - our son started school in Australia and adjusted just fine when we came back. The mistake we made was not treating it as an adventure with a return always an option so we built a house, got pets etc. We certainly don't regret going but wish we had treated it as 'working overseas' rather than 'migrating'. I think the biggest risk you face is one of you loves it and wants to stay permanently and the other doesn't. Do have a look at the 'sticky' thread on migrating with children - forewarned is forearmed and some couples are even going as far as having 'pre-migration agreements' drawn up. Do also be aware if it is a temporary 457 visa that it is tied to the job and should it not work out for any reason then you would have 90 days to find another sponsor or leave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Hi all,I could do with some advice, I am new here. so...my husband has been offered a job in melbourne. The salary is good, we get a free company car, all flights and shipping is covered, and visas will be sorted (and paid for) for us. We are currently in the uk, own a lovely family home (albeit not in the best areas for schools) and have two young children, 3 and 9months. We have family fairly close by, although don't see them that much and don't receive any help with childcare etc. The biggest risk with this kind of adventure is the cost, but in your case that's all being covered by your employer. Your children are young enough to adapt and you can rent out your home while you're away. I'd go for it, you have a rare opportunity to do this at no cost, and that doesn't come along very often. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buzzy--bee Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Come to Melbourne. I have friends who were in the same dilemma, also wanting to come here for a maximum of 2 years. They are still here 7 years later. BB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Roberto Posted October 25, 2014 Share Posted October 25, 2014 As someone who was sponsored to go to Australia and returned after 5 years because we preferred our UK lifestyle I'd agree with everyone else and say 'go for it' - our son started school in Australia and adjusted just fine when we came back. The mistake we made was not treating it as an adventure with a return always an option so we built a house, got pets etc. We certainly don't regret going but wish we had treated it as 'working overseas' rather than 'migrating'. I think the biggest risk you face is one of you loves it and wants to stay permanently and the other doesn't. Do have a look at the 'sticky' thread on migrating with children - forewarned is forearmed and some couples are even going as far as having 'pre-migration agreements' drawn up. Do also be aware if it is a temporary 457 visa that it is tied to the job and should it not work out for any reason then you would have 90 days to find another sponsor or leave. Hi - I couldn't find the thread 'migrating with kids'. I'll keep looking. Which section is it in? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunt Agatha Posted October 25, 2014 Share Posted October 25, 2014 In your shoes I'd do it - it will hopefully be a fun chapter in your lives as a family and cool to look back upon once you return to the UK. One word of caution though - make ABSOLUTELY SURE that your DH is aware that you won't stay longer than two years and make sure he feels the same. I've seen a few relationships in trouble on here and/or one person living somewhere they aren't happy because one wanted to stay and one wanted to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srh82 Posted October 26, 2014 Share Posted October 26, 2014 Same thoughts as @Aunt Agatha. Life is too short not to take such an opportunity just make sure you set the ground rules before you get on the plane! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted October 26, 2014 Share Posted October 26, 2014 You get to live in the best country on the planet though for me Melbourne was the 'pits'. Nothing to lose really. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark 1234 Posted October 26, 2014 Share Posted October 26, 2014 Last time I stayed in Melbourne (Northern suburbs) I hated it. Now I'm back and in St Kilda, I love it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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