legoman Posted April 27, 2014 Share Posted April 27, 2014 Some you may recall my earlier posts regarding my loving the UK and Perth and both have been very good to me even though I resigned myself to having one child in the uk and 1 in Oz. Well I didnt let on but I have been back in the UK for the last 5 months as my youngest stood by is decision to move back here as soon as he could and what a rollercoaster. I arrived on a rainy day and it seemed to rain for the next 3 months solid lol,I arrived first to clear the way for my son and get my house sorted. good to see parents but after near 3 years saw how much my dad has deteriorated and out of breath etc with a form of asbestosis.My old boss was straight on to me to work for him again so within a week of arriving I was back in college gaining my gas licences which I passed, I was told by my younger son that my eldest had some sort of emotional distress episode on my leaving which upset me and I remember being in Perth airport with both my boys wondering if this was the last time we would all be together, My eldest in fact booked a weeks visit to see me 4 weeks after I arrived!!. I started work and it was tough getting settled, On the first friday I sneaked to the local to semy pals as we always met on fridays in a local bar and none knew i was back,I found one pal in there who said the friday nights changed after i left and he was alone most weeks, good to catch up then on the monday he had a heart attack and has not been out since, that was november. still finding it difficult tosettleand the workplace had changed with lots of travel around hants and sussex etc, the house needed repairs due to leaks from the incessant rain but still it was home and in a way gld to be back. my youngest turned up just before xmas so all seemed well, trying to find other work as a gas engineer was difficult and my old contacts had moved on or away, coupled wit my partners mother who was ill and was phoning a lot, partner unable to move back for awhile and we had already agreed to part company, series of small but numerous bad luck occured but i was now settled and open to staying in the UK or Oz, still no jobs for me though and grew to dislike the job a lot although they now wanted me on the cards and a contract was due, my partner arrived and she moved into my house until she could find her own, 2 days later... I had a suspected heart attack,mild but put me in hospital and a month off work, came home to find contract of employment arrived, duly signed sent in and had to inform them I was off sick, straight away the company went cool on the idea of empolying me, asked me to resign if they paid sickpay til my sicknote expired which was increased by 4 weeks, had all sorts of test,small heart damage and still no idea what happened as arteries were clear insurance i took out for critical illness to pay off mortgage trying to get out of paying, several visits to partners mother increased and as i was off sick i visited to help out, turned up one day under all sorts of meds to find her dead on the floor, not good for me for sure and very sad for my partners mum, so funeral I sorted and wake etc at my house,eldest in oz married with kids still asking when i returning, youngest no intention of stepping foot in oz again. no more sick pay and no benefit sick pay until i complete habitual residency test which could and has taken months. the weather here been fab blue skies seaside and travel great, I signed of for a further month and have a MRI on heart in 2 weeks which i,m told will tell them what the problem with heart is, i tentatively put house up for sale for a month and it sold within 3 weeks,though i dont have to complete until the exchange of contracts, dilemma now is I would return to Perth alone where my eldest is or buy downsize here no mortgage, wait n see what mri results are as i on 7 tabs a day, i increased my visa rrv for a further 5 years ( and my youngest without him knowing 16 yrs ) So at the moment I stuck between a rock and a hard place and at 53 need to make a decision,personally now I feel i have moved on from the chase of good money doing the gas here and enjoyed the plod work i had in perth. however this time of year the uk is a beautiful place to be and inotice the upturn is there but slower than i imagined. a tough call to make. bit of a long post but as honest as i see it. I still see both good and bad in both countries and enjoy the positives of both. :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinsmom65 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 So sorry to read of your troubles. Hope you are on the mend health wise. Tough decision ahead and only one that you can make. Make up a list, at the end of the day life is short. Do what makes you happy. Cheers Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calNgary Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Glad your on the mend and i hope the tests etc dont sure up anything sinister. Tough decision on where to luve, i wouldnt like to be in your shoes, but considering everything you have gone through i would go to where makes you feel happiest. Cal x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 What a roller coaster! I hope the tests show nothing to worry about and that you are well on the way to getting back to normal! Id id say the same as the others - where will you be happiest? You'll have to resign yourself to having family on both sides of the world but focus on wherever meets all your needs for comfort, support, interest etc. An unenviable position to find yourself in to be sure! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Yes terrible run of bad luck, but remember bad luck and good luck could happen in either country. I don't know where you should live, but maybe try to leave recent bad luck out of the decision making process and look at each option on its merits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Pom Queen Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 So sorry to hear your news, hope everything turns out ok. Could you do 6 months in each country? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest16631 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 ........oh my just read your post,......:hug: ..........and as for choice......... ..........choose where and what will bring you joy........ .........take care and all the luck in the world........tink x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jac2011 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Sounds to me like their is good and bad in both places. Instead of thinking about money or your children, think about yourself, if there were no children and work was the same in both places where would you be? Try not to think about so many factors. It sounds like you are struggling at the moment with so much on your plate. Do you have anyone in the UK to just 'talk' to? Someone you could just get it all off your chest to? Sometimes talking through your feelings and thoughts help you put them in some sort of order. I wish you well in your recovery and I hope it was just a mini warning sign and nothing else. If you can take anything from this, take it as a sign that you need to enjoy your life for you, no one else. x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest 47403 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Sorry to read all that legoman no wise words of wisdom apart from (especially after a heart scare) go to whichever place will give you the least stress to live in, where ever that may be...............good luck with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legoman Posted April 28, 2014 Author Share Posted April 28, 2014 Thanks for replies, The good thing is where ever I live will make me happy as i love both places, I wish I could do 6 months in each country every year, I think once I find out the results of the mri i can decide, if all is well ten off back to Perth for me, if any underlying probs ten meds etc will seriously make me consider staying here and downsize mortgage free and visit Perth as much as I can, I see it as a win-win situ really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BritChickx Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 wow, sounds like you've been through it all. So sorry to hear of your MIL and it sounds like you were lucky if you did have a heart attack! I hope the outcome of the MRI is good. Are you back in Portsmouth now? Hope things improve for you, it's good that your house sold quickly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 So sorry to hear about all your troubles and health worries but glad to hear you're recovering, my hubby feels the same as you about work, he had lots of responsibility in the UK, same line of work here but without the hassle - he's loved taking a step back. Look after yourself x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legoman Posted April 28, 2014 Author Share Posted April 28, 2014 wow, sounds like you've been through it all. So sorry to hear of your MIL and it sounds like you were lucky if you did have a heart attack! I hope the outcome of the MRI is good. Are you back in Portsmouth now? Hope things improve for you, it's good that your house sold quickly. yes back in Portsmouth for now, been interesting, most people now just moved on which is good, best time of year spring is here was lucky in that my tenants looked after my house, what has surprised me is the number of 'tradies' here now who claim to be gas engineers electricians etc after 3 months training, no disrespect to them but i would be a little concerned and it seems gas safe issue certs to just anyone now. but hey not really my prob but has hit the work availability here. hopefully see the next 2 weeks out then get a move on Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BritChickx Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Im back here too...i can understsnd you wanting to get back out or move some where else! Dont plan on sticking around here either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wakeboard1980 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Thanks for replies, The good thing is where ever I live will make me happy as i love both places, I wish I could do 6 months in each country every year, I think once I find out the results of the mri i can decide, if all is well ten off back to Perth for me, if any underlying probs ten meds etc will seriously make me consider staying here and downsize mortgage free and visit Perth as much as I can, I see it as a win-win situ really. Sorry to hear about your issues. Looks like you have made your mind up about what you will do, sounds good. G ood luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bell123321 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 Hope the results come back okay from your mri scan. I agree with others about doing what you want to do and what makes you the happiest taking everything else out. Hope you feel better soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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