kellyjamie Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 knew it was too good to be true, my parents were being very positive and upbeat since we had our visa but now weve booked our flights its all change and the guilt trip, mood swings and negativity starts. they know we have to rent the house out as its not selling and say they agree its a good idea given the market and also if we need to come back but obviously we will have to save like mad from now till jan so my dad says were stupid going with not enough money and no job etc etc which yes i see his point but its like they think we havent thought any of this thru or that im incapable of making correct decisions for myself and my family. i love them and will miss them and cant wait to be able to show them round australia but at the same time im happy to finally be able to cut my apron strings, i just dont need the negativity and attitude it hacks me off:no: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest 47403 Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 Stick with probably being like they are because they are split between knowing they will miss you and also wanting you to have a successful move. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lyndalelodge Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 I sympathise entirely. My Mum's been great, but the inlaws...FFS, talk about a miserable 11 months since we told them (for them and my to some extent, my Missus cos of them; but I just ignore them!!). It's not easy, but I hope they move on for all your sakes or they'll regret spoiling the 6 months before you leave! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest rico123 Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 Hey kelly, first of all congratulations in getting ur flights booked its finally happening!!! we are also getting the same attitude at the moment..not from my mum...from my gran(dads mum) who thinks im her daughter...the atmosphere is terrible-she says im destroying her life taking my 2 daughters away from her and is being quite morbid and making me promise i will be at her funeral etc, im not leaving till Nov and i seriously cannot be doing with this atmosphere till then.She is only seeing the selfish side..not that we will be giving our daughters a better life...i cant wait to go either.x:rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mandi1971 Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 knew it was too good to be true, my parents were being very positive and upbeat since we had our visa but now weve booked our flights its all change and the guilt trip, mood swings and negativity starts. they know we have to rent the house out as its not selling and say they agree its a good idea given the market and also if we need to come back but obviously we will have to save like mad from now till jan so my dad says were stupid going with not enough money and no job etc etc which yes i see his point but its like they think we havent thought any of this thru or that im incapable of making correct decisions for myself and my family. i love them and will miss them and cant wait to be able to show them round australia but at the same time im happy to finally be able to cut my apron strings, i just dont need the negativity and attitude it hacks me off:no: Congrats on your visa hun!! Things with your family will settle down, its always the same, they go along with your plans thinking it'll never happen then BANG reality kicks in. Once they get over the initial shock, they'll be fine. I spoke to my family more when i was away than i do now im home? Its weird :eek: Just enjoy making all your plans and give them time to absorb everything, some times we forget how hard it is for them to let us go :wubclub: We have no house to sell so have to save like mad too, so i know how that feels, but im sure we'll be fine. We are budgeting for all the the essentials and once we have flights booked etc i will start applying for jobs for my OH as he wont sleep at night if he hasnt got a job to go to. I hope it all works out for you, its the most stressful thing you'll ever do but hopefully it'll all be worth it Mandi x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the bottler Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 My brother and his wife gave my nephew and family a very hard time when they told them they were emigrating . he was rude , nasty and negative . Because my son did everything he could to help them when they validated their visa and when they emigrated , he was exremely rude to me about him . But they went out to visit them last year he completely changed his mind . He sent me a post card saying " I understand now why they wanted to emigrate . It is a much better life for them " . He also said he wished he had emigrated to Australia when he came out of the R.A.F. So give your parents time and when they visit they will see for themselves your reason for going . Good luck with your move and let us know how you get on . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 Alrite Kelly I see this quite often on here tbh,im fortunate that both sets of parents are ok with us going(but a bit sad),so i cant claim to know how cheesed off it makes people if i'm honest,but looking in as an outsider,i allways think its a situation in which neither party is at "blame" for anything,im not talking "extreme" behaviour,just the stuff that kellys mentioned.......being a bit resentfull of sons,daughters and grandkids leaving. The way it seems to me is that "yes" parents would be happy for you in an ideal world,but when their not happy for you its(normally) because of their love for you/your kids,most parents have probably allways put you before them all their lives,mine did i know that,i know its not true for all parents sadly,but in the main..... So i think its only natural that at a time their kids and grandkids are going to oz those parents "might" just be thinking of themselves just for once,most are probably due it. Your not to blame for going and their not to blame for wanting you by them,i think thats the main thing to remember,nobodies to blame for a "strained" atmosphere,its just the way it is for some unfortunately,hopefully when everyones adjusted to the move things improve,good luck anyway Kelly:smile: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Ropey HOFF Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 Its only natural, they will be scared and sad to see you go and its a coping mechanism, i hope they come round soon, all the best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ClaireT Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 Hi Kelly, I was so lucky from the start my parents told me to go for it and I would regret it in years to come if I didn't at least try it, they always seemed very postive about the move although I know it was so hard for them.Now we are here my dad told me he thought it was the right decision. Others were not so postive....but hey I just shrugged it off and just focused on getting here. Good luck with the move, Claire Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul1Perth Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 Parents always think they know best and no matter how old you are they still see you as their little girl. They come from a generation where moving to the other side of the world was not contemplated and they wouldn't do anything without saving for it first. If they were positive for you at the start I'm sure they will come round, especially when you invite them out on holiday. Both our sets of parents were supportive but anxious, I think they didn't expect us to go through with the move. Since they have been out here and seen what it's like they all agree that it was the best move we could have made. They would be out here themselves if they could. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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