Thinking of moving back to the UK

[sambojambo]

Oh I really understand and feel for you. Im not the same person I used to be..... not worse or better , just not as wild hearted I suppose. I understand the conversation aspect totally and Im married into a lovely aussie family. When I went home for the third time in 10 years I felt a buzz in the English air I had never felt before.... I felt excited by the characters, the movement....people going about there business with intent. Conversations with strangers were funny and witty even if you were just buying a coffee in a shop. I felt alive inside and I laughed so much in the three weeks! But I also love my quiet existance in OZ, but I have few laughs to be honest .....except with my husband who is the silliest aussie I have ever come across!!

Good luck to you, you have to do what you believe will make you feel YOU again. :biggrin:

[Verulam]

It is hard to know what to do for the best. I am older than you (53 ) , and lived in Australia in my 40s. I, too, always felt something lacking while we were in Aus- hard to describe- sort of like a "buzz". I also found the Aussies (although I love them dearly and am married to one) to be very unconcerned and not knowledgable about the rest of the world. In fact my own Aussie in laws thought that Wales was a seperate island, and had no idea of the geography of most of the world beyond their own part of the planet, and not particularly interested in finding out. Very much an Aussie aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi personality. (Never been out of their country and never will-why would they want to cos its the best! )

Personally I feel more "alive" here in the UK....love going back to Aus for holidays though, and feel lucky that my Aussie hubby is happy here in the UK too.

[Guest MarkChris]

Firstly, I'm very sorry to hear that you are facing such a difficult dilemma. Could I be so bold to suggest if your health isn't great and you are facing the prospect of separating from your partner that you might not be as resilient and positive as usual. Perhaps now isn't the best time to be making the decision to go home?

 

I am surprised that you are finding it a challenge to meet people to have an intelligent conversation with. I live in a large rural town and my social circle is comprised of doctors, lawyers, accountants, physios and other professionals. Is it that you haven't been able to build a social network to your liking? Could you possibly try other avenues to meet your thirst for mental stimulation?

 

Sometimes when people are a bit down in the dumps life's challenges seem overwhelming. Perhaps it would be good to have a chat with a mate or professional that can provide an objective opinion?

 

I think the best thing about Australia is the exposure to a variety of cultures, opportunities to meet friendly people and beautiful places to travel. I've travelled extensively in Australia and abroad and I do understand what you mean about difference in cultures. I think you may find that Aussies are generally down to earth people and historically intellectuals have been frowned upon. So many Aussies will play it down a bit or they risk their mates take the piss out of them! Persist with the conversation and I am sure you will be pleasantly surprised.

 

Give it some time, try an build other support networks, see a professional or talk to a mate that can provide an objective opinion and some kind words.

 

Anyway I'm going to sign off by saying good luck with your decision and I hope that your health improves.

 

Take care

 

Markchris :biggrin:

[Guest Guest37175]

Well, I have now been in Oz for nearly 3 years and at the moment I am seriously thinking about returning home. I think that Australia is a really beautiful place (places to visit, that is)...but I don't feel that that is enough to keep me here. I actually believe that I came to live here too late in life; I am now 45 years old. I am the kind of person who loves to travel, and have travelled far and wide for years. However, I do believe that I can live anywhere, which I can, but I also believe that to live anywhere you have to be happy where you are living.

The dilemma that I face is the fact that my partner of 10 years has always wanted to live in Oz, and she still does. We get on really well and have always had a great relationship, but I have felt myself getting more withdrawn, especially during the last 6 months or so. I have always been an upbeat, social character; I love to be out and about, going for drinks, theatre, football matches, galleries etc. I also perform stand up comedy, but the fun within me has diminished. In some ways I feel that this is to do with my surroundings and the differences with humour and normal every day life compared to the UK. I don't tend to find the intelligence within general conversation with people here as I do back home; therefore, after a while I tend to switch off because I know that it is not going to go anywhere. Yes, I do feel that people here are always open and want to chat, but I feel that there is something lacking. I don’t mean to be disrespectful and negative towards the people of Australia, I just think that it is an entirely different culture and a very different way of life compared to what I am used to.

I feel that when you have been brought up and educated in a country for over 40 odd years, it is more difficult to get used to an entirely different way of life in a new country such as Oz. During my travels I have spent a great deal of time in Europe over the years, but have always felt at ease and able to converse with the local population, even if the language is different, that always made it a bit more fun. I also think that learning a new language in order to live within a country would be a great challenge, and also a large part of my integration into a new community. I always new that I wanted to leave the UK, and go and live elsewhere, but before I met my partner, Australia never really entered my thoughts as a country that I could possibly live. Maybe if you are born and bred within the European community, then there are more similarities than what you are really aware of. If I do return to the UK, then there are plenty European countries that I can choose from in which to live, with a more interesting culture and historical background. Both culture and history are two of my great loves, something else that I have missed since being in Oz.

I suppose I just wanted to write this short piece to try and convey my thoughts and feelings and get things off my chest. I don’t want to come across in a negative way, but to reassure folks who are thinking of moving here, that these feelings I believe to be normal. It takes time to adjust, people I have spoken to have stated that it normally takes around 3 years to get things into any kind of order. Some people who read this may totally disagree with what I have said, but at the end of the day, everybody is different, some adjust quicker than others. However, if you are thinking about moving here because the weather and climate may be better than back home, then also be aware that there is more to life and happiness than the weather issue.

But from a totally stereotypical, pommie view point, I bloody miss a proper pub and a real game of football.

 

 

I really sympathise Dave. I was 40 when I arrived in Oz and I think my age contributed to a lot of the problems that I experienced with assimilating into a new country. I do think that the older we get, the less adaptable we become. Personally I too could have carried on living in Oz - my Australian partner and daughter were very happy there - but it just felt that a part of my heart had shut down. I realised that time spent with friends and family, doing stuff that I enjoyed (even something as ordinary as watching 'Match Of The Day') or just being around others with a shared frame of reference made me who I am. Being starved of family and friends, being asked to embrace activities I had no interest in (like going the beach) and being on the outside of conversations due to that lack of shared references or memories constantly reminded me that I was an outsider.

 

I always think that to live somewhere, to really live there, requires a sense of connectedness. Sometimes no matter how hard you try, or how long, you just can't find it.

 

Best of luck.

[Guest JulieW]

Hi Dave,

 

I sympathise with your feelings. I was 44 when we came here 5 years ago and I also feel that was too old. I have realised I am an Old World, European, Northern Hemisphere person, not even necessarily the UK (though I love it) but Europe with its history, culture, beautiful buildings and countryside. I too have lived in other countires in Europe (Spain and Sweden) and not felt the dislocation I feel here. Also, if you love travelling, Australia is not the best place to live given its distance from other places. I have been lucky enough to spend a week in France with my sister and friends each year for the last two and laughed more in those two weeks than during 5 years in Oz!

 

Well, I have now been in Oz for nearly 3 years and at the moment I am seriously thinking about returning home. I think that Australia is a really beautiful place (places to visit, that is)...but I don't feel that that is enough to keep me here. I actually believe that I came to live here too late in life; I am now 45 years old. I am the kind of person who loves to travel, and have travelled far and wide for years. However, I do believe that I can live anywhere, which I can, but I also believe that to live anywhere you have to be happy where you are living.

 

The dilemma that I face is the fact that my partner of 10 years has always wanted to live in Oz, and she still does. We get on really well and have always had a great relationship, but I have felt myself getting more withdrawn, especially during the last 6 months or so. I have always been an upbeat, social character; I love to be out and about, going for drinks, theatre, football matches, galleries etc. I also perform stand up comedy, but the fun within me has diminished. In some ways I feel that this is to do with my surroundings and the differences with humour and normal every day life compared to the UK. I don't tend to find the intelligence within general conversation with people here as I do back home; therefore, after a while I tend to switch off because I know that it is not going to go anywhere. Yes, I do feel that people here are always open and want to chat, but I feel that there is something lacking. I don’t mean to be disrespectful and negative towards the people of Australia, I just think that it is an entirely different culture and a very different way of life compared to what I am used to.

 

I feel that when you have been brought up and educated in a country for over 40 odd years, it is more difficult to get used to an entirely different way of life in a new country such as Oz. During my travels I have spent a great deal of time in Europe over the years, but have always felt at ease and able to converse with the local population, even if the language is different, that always made it a bit more fun. I also think that learning a new language in order to live within a country would be a great challenge, and also a large part of my integration into a new community. I always new that I wanted to leave the UK, and go and live elsewhere, but before I met my partner, Australia never really entered my thoughts as a country that I could possibly live. Maybe if you are born and bred within the European community, then there are more similarities than what you are really aware of. If I do return to the UK, then there are plenty European countries that I can choose from in which to live, with a more interesting culture and historical background. Both culture and history are two of my great loves, something else that I have missed since being in Oz.

 

I suppose I just wanted to write this short piece to try and convey my thoughts and feelings and get things off my chest. I don’t want to come across in a negative way, but to reassure folks who are thinking of moving here, that these feelings I believe to be normal. It takes time to adjust, people I have spoken to have stated that it normally takes around 3 years to get things into any kind of order. Some people who read this may totally disagree with what I have said, but at the end of the day, everybody is different, some adjust quicker than others. However, if you are thinking about moving here because the weather and climate may be better than back home, then also be aware that there is more to life and happiness than the weather issue.

 

But from a totally stereotypical, pommie view point, I bloody miss a proper pub and a real game of football.

 

[olly]

Well, I have now been in Oz for nearly 3 years and at the moment I am seriously thinking about returning home. I think that Australia is a really beautiful place (places to visit, that is)...but I don't feel that that is enough to keep me here. I actually believe that I came to live here too late in life; I am now 45 years old. I am the kind of person who loves to travel, and have travelled far and wide for years. However, I do believe that I can live anywhere, which I can, but I also believe that to live anywhere you have to be happy where you are living.

 

The dilemma that I face is the fact that my partner of 10 years has always wanted to live in Oz, and she still does. We get on really well and have always had a great relationship, but I have felt myself getting more withdrawn, especially during the last 6 months or so. I have always been an upbeat, social character; I love to be out and about, going for drinks, theatre, football matches, galleries etc. I also perform stand up comedy, but the fun within me has diminished. In some ways I feel that this is to do with my surroundings and the differences with humour and normal every day life compared to the UK. I don't tend to find the intelligence within general conversation with people here as I do back home; therefore, after a while I tend to switch off because I know that it is not going to go anywhere. Yes, I do feel that people here are always open and want to chat, but I feel that there is something lacking. I don’t mean to be disrespectful and negative towards the people of Australia, I just think that it is an entirely different culture and a very different way of life compared to what I am used to.

 

I feel that when you have been brought up and educated in a country for over 40 odd years, it is more difficult to get used to an entirely different way of life in a new country such as Oz. During my travels I have spent a great deal of time in Europe over the years, but have always felt at ease and able to converse with the local population, even if the language is different, that always made it a bit more fun. I also think that learning a new language in order to live within a country would be a great challenge, and also a large part of my integration into a new community. I always new that I wanted to leave the UK, and go and live elsewhere, but before I met my partner, Australia never really entered my thoughts as a country that I could possibly live. Maybe if you are born and bred within the European community, then there are more similarities than what you are really aware of. If I do return to the UK, then there are plenty European countries that I can choose from in which to live, with a more interesting culture and historical background. Both culture and history are two of my great loves, something else that I have missed since being in Oz.

 

I suppose I just wanted to write this short piece to try and convey my thoughts and feelings and get things off my chest. I don’t want to come across in a negative way, but to reassure folks who are thinking of moving here, that these feelings I believe to be normal. It takes time to adjust, people I have spoken to have stated that it normally takes around 3 years to get things into any kind of order. Some people who read this may totally disagree with what I have said, but at the end of the day, everybody is different, some adjust quicker than others. However, if you are thinking about moving here because the weather and climate may be better than back home, then also be aware that there is more to life and happiness than the weather issue.

 

But from a totally stereotypical, pommie view point, I bloody miss a proper pub and a real game of football.

 

 

Good luck with your travels. Hope you find your happiness again someone along the line. Australia does have a culture and history but it is not of interest to everyone I admit. (Aldo has pressed the thanks button, as although he is supposed to be gone, he will be jubilant that you agree with him).

[olly]

Now there's a typical English comment for you.

Have you watched he English "comedy" Benidorme? I tried a couple of times but it made me cringe as it's so close to the truth for some.

I remember when we used to go to Spain in the 70's and 80's and you would get English holidaymakers over complaining about "foreign muck" for the food and "you can't get a decent pint" and "can't anyone speak English. They thought the answer to the language problem was just to shout louder at the person you were talking to.

 

The same thing is spoiling Australia as happened in Spain. Too many Brits who want everything to be like bogan says "England with sunshine".

 

You posted what I had second thoughts about posting Paul1, as I knew what boganbear meant by his post, but my brother came back from Croatia this past summer and said "I met some Benidorm Brits over there - oh hell I hope I don't run into them again on a tour next time - they whinged the whole time and we had to duck for cover from a few of them, and they didn't talk much to us although we tried several times to make conversation"). Naturally all Brits are not Benidorm Brits, the same as all Aussies are not like Kath and Kim and that horrid family in Sydney filmed a few years ago. We all have our stories to tell don't we - bad Brits, bad Aussies, bad French, bad....................................(insert here).:SLEEP:

[Guest guest32776]

It is hard to know what to do for the best. I am older than you (53 ) , and lived in Australia in my 40s. I, too, always felt something lacking while we were in Aus- hard to describe- sort of like a "buzz". I also found the Aussies (although I love them dearly and am married to one) to be very unconcerned and not knowledgable about the rest of the world. In fact my own Aussie in laws thought that Wales was a seperate island, and had no idea of the geography of most of the world beyond their own part of the planet, and not particularly interested in finding out. Very much an Aussie aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi personality. (Never been out of their country and never will-why would they want to cos its the best! )

Personally I feel more "alive" here in the UK....love going back to Aus for holidays though, and feel lucky that my Aussie hubby is happy here in the UK too.

 

I completely agree with you. We definitely suffer form the 'lacking' sensation - a sort of ennui/malaise. If it wasn't a cliche 'you took the words right out of my mouth'...

[Guest davethebear]

Thanks to everyone for your kind words and support.................I only found this site very recently and I didn't expect the support I have been given...........cheers to you all....davethebear x

[Guest stellios]

Dave you have quoted exactly the reasons we are have become increasingly doubtful that Australia is the place for us. Had a fantastic time on our reccie this summer but somehow the place just didn't grab us in the way we expected it to and it was very much down to cultural differences. We still haven't ruled out the move but now have huge reservations.

[Guest bacardi167]

didn't like saying that, because I like all nationalities ,but its not British white any longer, so got to say it wasn't like being home at all

 

Firstly, let me say what a shame it is that you allow posts like this on this site....Does a place have to full of White people to feel like home?!! I am of mixed race and grew up in london in the 70's. I thought Uk was considerd the most racialy tolerent country in the world....what a ridiculous statement !!

 

FYI...immigrants went to the uk and took all the jobs the "white english" wouldn't do like ooening on sundays, after midday on wednesday, 24 hours shops etc...dont complain because they worked when we were lazy !!

 

Before i carry on..will the mods please inform me if this is a racist site, then i will not continue to post here and leave you to your own devices.

 

How do you think the indians feel when returning to home and seeing all those white faces !!

 

ANYWAY

Dave, i understand what you are saying and i feel the culture here is diffrent to the uk. People in the U have diffrent values and it is hard to adjust. I dont thgink Australians are less inteligent than us, but simply have other intrests and priorities.....for exmple..my misus has a Hyundai I30..would you ever dream of being seen in one of those in the UK. Personally i still drive an Audi.

 

Dave i hope you find happiness somewhere...hopefully with your partner

 

BIB

[Quoll]

If you have any thoughts about moving then do it now rather than waiting and drifting past the point of no return IMHO. It is very easy to get stuck here - finances and family are the usual reasons which sometimes trap you. There is nothing in the rule book that says every man and his dog has to think this place is heaven on a stick - works for some but not for others and if you like a bit of buzz and variety in your life, then this probably wont be the place for you. I think the acid test is - is this the place you want to grow old in? If the answer is hell no then get out while you still have the capacity!

 

Good luck with whatever you decide!

[Bod]

Well, I have now been in Oz for nearly 3 years and at the moment I am seriously thinking about returning home. I think that Australia is a really beautiful place (places to visit, that is)...but I don't feel that that is enough to keep me here. I actually believe that I came to live here too late in life; I am now 45 years old. I am the kind of person who loves to travel, and have travelled far and wide for years. However, I do believe that I can live anywhere, which I can, but I also believe that to live anywhere you have to be happy where you are living.

 

The dilemma that I face is the fact that my partner of 10 years has always wanted to live in Oz, and she still does. We get on really well and have always had a great relationship, but I have felt myself getting more withdrawn, especially during the last 6 months or so. I have always been an upbeat, social character; I love to be out and about, going for drinks, theatre, football matches, galleries etc. I also perform stand up comedy, but the fun within me has diminished. In some ways I feel that this is to do with my surroundings and the differences with humour and normal every day life compared to the UK. I don't tend to find the intelligence within general conversation with people here as I do back home; therefore, after a while I tend to switch off because I know that it is not going to go anywhere. Yes, I do feel that people here are always open and want to chat, but I feel that there is something lacking. I don’t mean to be disrespectful and negative towards the people of Australia, I just think that it is an entirely different culture and a very different way of life compared to what I am used to.

 

I feel that when you have been brought up and educated in a country for over 40 odd years, it is more difficult to get used to an entirely different way of life in a new country such as Oz. During my travels I have spent a great deal of time in Europe over the years, but have always felt at ease and able to converse with the local population, even if the language is different, that always made it a bit more fun. I also think that learning a new language in order to live within a country would be a great challenge, and also a large part of my integration into a new community. I always new that I wanted to leave the UK, and go and live elsewhere, but before I met my partner, Australia never really entered my thoughts as a country that I could possibly live. Maybe if you are born and bred within the European community, then there are more similarities than what you are really aware of. If I do return to the UK, then there are plenty European countries that I can choose from in which to live, with a more interesting culture and historical background. Both culture and history are two of my great loves, something else that I have missed since being in Oz.

 

I suppose I just wanted to write this short piece to try and convey my thoughts and feelings and get things off my chest. I don’t want to come across in a negative way, but to reassure folks who are thinking of moving here, that these feelings I believe to be normal. It takes time to adjust, people I have spoken to have stated that it normally takes around 3 years to get things into any kind of order. Some people who read this may totally disagree with what I have said, but at the end of the day, everybody is different, some adjust quicker than others. However, if you are thinking about moving here because the weather and climate may be better than back home, then also be aware that there is more to life and happiness than the weather issue.

 

But from a totally stereotypical, pommie view point, I bloody miss a proper pub and a real game of football.

 

 

 

 

Me to a T

[Guest chris955]

Yes I think a lot of people feel the same way. My recent time in the UK just reinforced how almost mundane my life here feels. That isn't to say it would be like that for everyone of course but as we are all different it feels differently for everyone.

[Guest famousfive]

I think if you have to change to the point of not being happy within yourself then the price is too high.This plays a really big part in our decision to return home,we are but a shadow of ourselves here and that is no way to live a life.Maybe our kids would have better oportunities here,who knows they might well turn into dole bludgers[over my dead body] but I can honestly say, at the risk of being ranted at for oz bashing,that they were much more ALIVE in some way before we came here and I think they will grow up to have more interesting lives if we return.This is SOLELY based on our experience here versus our experience in Ire and not a rant about Aus in general.My view is it is a great country if you like it but no better than many others if it does not float your boat.

[Guest chris955]

Yes I agree with all that. The point about kids miraculously having a better life and future is bizarre at best as it depends totally on the individual not the country they are in.

I can't remember when I had laughed so hard as when I was recently in the UK with long time friends. Life just seemed to be about having fun and enjoying themselves rather than who had the biggest house or best car.

[Guest guest32776]

I think if you have to change to the point of not being happy within yourself then the price is too high.This plays a really big part in our decision to return home,we are but a shadow of ourselves here and that is no way to live a life.Maybe our kids would have better oportunities here,who knows they might well turn into dole bludgers[over my dead body] but I can honestly say, at the risk of being ranted at for oz bashing,that they were much more ALIVE in some way before we came here and I think they will grow up to have more interesting lives if we return.This is SOLELY based on our experience here versus our experience in Ire and not a rant about Aus in general.My view is it is a great country if you like it but no better than many others if it does not float your boat.

 

I know some people will not like this thread as it has emerged as some sort of support group for those of us who feel there is a certain vibrancy missing to life in Australia but personally I am really pleased someone started it. Since 3 years or so in to life here I have felt a little depressed, underconfident and gloomy with a real sense of 'lack' . This thread has made me feel as though it is not me who is deficient and there are many people feeling the same way....

[Guest famousfive]

Be assured you are not alone in how you feel.For some,Aus will never offer the life they are looking for.I am now one of them,as is my aussie husband,in fact the way he describes it is 'like constantly having the snooze button on'.He often comments how lucky he is to have experienced living overseas because it has awakened his personality and made him realise he is capable of things he would never have dreamed of here.He cringes to see what boring lives his siblings lead and how they have no 'get up and go'.His younger sisters really do lead a life that my retired mom would find boring so I see his point.We are all different thankfully and I am happy for those who enjoy life here,I hope they are just as happy for me for enjoying life elsewhere!!

[notaclue]

This completely reiterates how I feel about oz. I can see that it a lovely place, I can see, and have experienced that some of the states are different to others - but - there is just that huge but. We are pingpongers - wasnt too fussed about coming here the second time around, but without boring everyone, not everything is clear and cut.

Having grown up in some rough place in manchester, no education, no way out - I got myself out, travelled a bit, got an education as an adult, and truly believe that we, as a family, have it all. Nothing to do with oodles of money, just good jobs, enough to live on, great kids, health etc - what else could I possibly need or want? Being in oz though, has made me realise that, imo, its only when you have that knowledge/education/travel you have mixed and made friends with lots of different people/cultures - you have experienced a different sort of life, you can take a step back and see the bigger picture, think out of the box and are more tolerant to others, more open to others views and opinions. Here in regional nsw - I find people a bit dull, nothing really to say. Well, actually lots to say about their dislikes of certain people, but have never travelled or been anywhere, or even mixed with other cultures. No says they read a great book, fancies going to see something at the theatre, went to some great country they enjoyed. Its all just a bit parochial. After all that, I think I am saying that I feel I have stepped out of life and am treading water until I can get back into it. Our plan is to stay for the 4 years. This ties in with a work contract, so has to be really, probably go back to uk and buy a house in the last year to go back to. It all seems more palatable this way. One of our children is 11, and am aware that this would be a difficult time for him, however, we have all discussed that this is only for a period of time, and have souped it up to him (which is actually true) that how lucky they are that they have the opportunity to travel and experience so much - make friends all over the world, and if wants to - can easily come back when he is older. How fantastic is that!!

I think it seems that knowing that this is definately a place i want to grow old in, I hopefully can enjoy it in the meantime knowing it is a finite period. imo, this is key - giving a finite period of time before the situation is assessed. Heres to a long way to go - off to nippers!!:SLEEP:

[THE DUNSCOMBE FAMILY]

Hi My other half was 45 when we came here i was 42, weve been here two years now, been through the mill with health issues and still are, we also got married in May after 15years of being together , best day ever, i guess it all depends what you want out of life, for us Yes its been very hard , both Financially and emotionally for everyone, we have two children also age 8 and 14 and 24 back in the Uk.Would we change our lifes and go back the Uk Absolutly not .Its all down to the reasons why you first came out here , for us it was a better quality of life both for us and our children , Good luck with your decision hope all works out

[Guest colette12]

I know where i came from in the Uk was not one of the best areas (Lytham St Annes ) and i know where i have come to in Australia ( after extensive travel ) is one of the best ( Caloundra ). I have made wonderful friends here and I am surrounded by beauty....

 

Iv been here just under 2 yrs and I'm now organizing to go home to that "**** hole" ( my words when i left) because it has more life and vibrancy than the whole of Australia put together ( imho )..

 

I am dead here...

 

Colette

[Quoll]

Wow, really interesting the number of us who spontaneously describe our lives as half dead (or words to that effect) treading water boredom. For the longest time I thought there was something wrong with me but knowing that I feel ALIVE! when I am with people I belong with, doing things I want to do and LAUGHING fit to burst, I can just about manage the tedium of living here (my daughter in law, last year on a visit to UK with me just out of the blue made the comment that I was a different person in UK - how right she was!). Only 5 more sleeps and then I am off for another 6 week jaunt woo hooo!

[Quoll]

Yes I agree with all that. The point about kids miraculously having a better life and future is bizarre at best as it depends totally on the individual not the country they are in.

I can't remember when I had laughed so hard as when I was recently in the UK with long time friends. Life just seemed to be about having fun and enjoying themselves rather than who had the biggest house or best car.

 

I so agree - swapping one first world country for another is not going to engender any miraculous advantage on a kid, it is all about the folk who care for them and nurture them and the mates they make as they trot through life and the skills they acquire. I really do think people believe that the magic plane ride gives kids more brain cells and a personality transplant sometimes. Different lifestyle - sure, but better???? the jury is out on that one.

[Guest guest30038]

I so agree - swapping one first world country for another is not going to engender any miraculous advantage on a kid, it is all about the folk who care for them and nurture them and the mates they make as they trot through life and the skills they acquire. I really do think people believe that the magic plane ride gives kids more brain cells and a personality transplant sometimes. Different lifestyle - sure, but better???? the jury is out on that one.

 

I personally have never thought that Oz alone gave my kids a "better chance". In my case, it's how I feel/react/parent that gives my kids a better life. I'm more relaxed here, have more time for them, and yes, I think being here has made me a better parent/person because I don't have the fears/worries that I had in the UK.

 

If someone else doesn't feel that way, then I wouldn't hesitate to wish them well in their return to the UK. If they feel better for doing that, then I'm sure they will be all the better parents for it, or at the least, their parenting would be more "natural" and "unstifled".

 

I've said it before, but if I could have moved to Cornwall before I came here, then Cornwall would have had exactly the same effect (as Oz) on my kids (via my parenting), as I would likely have been as happy there, as I am here.

 

Despite my love of Oz, I have never felt that I could not love the UK just as much, if only I was in the right location.

 

kev

[Skani]

Life just seemed to be about having fun and enjoying themselves rather than who had the biggest house or best car.

 

But that's not peculiar to the UK. The size of the house or type of car counts for absolutely zilch amongst the people I know.