Stovies Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 After many weeks of to-ing and fro-ing (after we had "definately" made the decision to return to the UK), we have decided to stay. The reasons? Well, the children were born here and are settled and were feeling pretty traumatised about going back. Another reason? My husband has a well paid job here and not much possibility of another one being offered in his field in the UK(specialised IT), it seemed foolish to upsticks and go over with no job and no prospects. Another reason? Well, the 'lifestyle' that I mocked before is actually quite important for my children (two with mild autism). They have space, privacy and nature on their doorstep and are happy. Me? I am adjusting to staying. I am beginning to wake up and smell the roses. I was homesick but you can never really go back to how things were. I am gaining a new appreciation of life over here and with the prospect of yearly visits back to Scotland, I think I will cope! I just wanted to be honest and post how things are now. What an emotional rollercoaster it has been. :spinny: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest31881 Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Good luck and best wish's for the future:biggrin: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ista Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Congrats to you and yours for coming to a final decision, especially such a big one. I think your point about how you "can never really go back to how things were" is a very true one - life moves on and your experiences change you so you can never go back, just move forward. All the very best for your future. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest famousfive Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Good luck to you all.It must be great to have the decision made and to be able to get on with life now knowing what you are doing and where you are doing it. Enjoy and make the most of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest37336 Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Good for you Stovies, and I'm not saying that because I love Australia. Don't forget though you are still allowed to change your mind about your future, whatever makes you happy is the key thing. Cheers Tony Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KAS Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Good for you, I to was in the same situation not so long ago,I've comprimised with my OH with yearly trips back home. I can relate to the feeling that everbodys moved on, as we Lived in Melbourne for a year came back and struggled and I started to appreciate what we had in Oz hence back here. Good luck with your decision it sounds like you've made the right choice,home will always be there and you never know on our annual trips home we could be sat together on the plane lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenix16 Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 I have immense respect for you, what a really honest and selfless post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tracy123 Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 I agree with Tony, never say never BUT Once you have made your mind up to stay at least you can get your head around things and move forward rather than treading water waiting to go back Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stovies Posted July 16, 2010 Author Share Posted July 16, 2010 Thank you all so much for your responses. Every one appreciated. I felt that I had to post our situation as I, in my dilemma of whether to go or stay, hung on to every word of other people's experiences on this forum. I had to think hard about what the family will be 'giving up'. Will they adjust easily to the very different life in the UK? I went back for a holiday and loved it but I loved it because I was used to that kind of lifestyle. My children (10,11 and 13) are not used to that lifestyle. They are used to a peaceful and easy lifestyle here. I don't think they would cope with what we could offer them over there. I think I was blinded by emotion and wasn't able to step back and look at things from a place of reality. However, I have been through the tunnel and came out the other end. We know that it was a case of now or never because if we didn't go now, then it will be too late, in that. in a few years, our children will be leaving school, going to uni/college, getting jobs, getting married (or being in significant relationships) having grandchildren (?).... then there would be no way we would leave them and go back. So the line has been drawn and I look forward to my many visits back home! Best of both worlds? Thanks again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Perth Princess Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Thanks for your reassuring post. I am almost with you, just a step or two behind....We are staying for the kids too, and I am starting to see more positives about our situation. I think I will always miss england but there is plenty to be grateful for here too :wubclub: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongrel Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 ONE point might help you dont take it the wrong way as i`m yorkshire thro and thro , but stop saying home your home is here now when you get to thinking that you will progress, your roots are in the uk mine are in yorkshire ,wont ever forget or not love but home is australia now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest valleylass Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Good for you - family is what it's all about. All the very best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scousers Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 We are going thru the same thing, been in Melbourne for 22 years and 11 year old daughter born here. She is an Aussie and likes to tell us so, not very keen in the UK when she goes there, i think some of that is fear though. My husband hardly ever goes back, i think he has been 3 times where i have been 10, and would go more often if i could. Hubby will go back if i force the issue, but what to really? We are from the Wirral and from what i hear there are no jobs around, i know most of my friends have poor paying jobs and are struggling. We could afford a good house cash these days, and i would love to be back with the old friends i still have over there, most from school days, and did i mention it is not just the 3 of us here, but my parents and brother and his wife and son have all been here for 15 years. The things that keep us here are Education for our daughter - we did not get a good education in the UK and from what i can see it has not changed in our area Jobs - never had a issue getting good jobs in OZ But miss the Liverpool area very much - so will keep debating this one for some time to come i think. Joy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Conniebygaslight Posted July 17, 2010 Share Posted July 17, 2010 We are going thru the same thing, been in Melbourne for 22 years and 11 year old daughter born here. She is an Aussie and likes to tell us so, not very keen in the UK when she goes there, i think some of that is fear though. My husband hardly ever goes back, i think he has been 3 times where i have been 10, and would go more often if i could. Hubby will go back if i force the issue, but what to really? We are from the Wirral and from what i hear there are no jobs around, i know most of my friends have poor paying jobs and are struggling. We could afford a good house cash these days, and i would love to be back with the old friends i still have over there, most from school days, and did i mention it is not just the 3 of us here, but my parents and brother and his wife and son have all been here for 15 years. The things that keep us here are Education for our daughter - we did not get a good education in the UK and from what i can see it has not changed in our area Jobs - never had a issue getting good jobs in OZ But miss the Liverpool area very much - so will keep debating this one for some time to come i think. Joy I think that 22 years is a long time to be away and it could be the case taht none of you would settle if you returned. My Aussie husband has been away from Australia for about the same length of time-he feels so out of it here now and cannot wait to get back to the UK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heyyu Posted July 17, 2010 Share Posted July 17, 2010 here here:cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 17, 2010 Share Posted July 17, 2010 Good luck with it. Your kids will probably fly the coop once they get old enough anyway and unless you are going to trek around the world after them then will be the time to work out where you want to be with your life. It is hard once they get into their teens - early teens they wont want to leave, late teens early twenties and you wont see them for dust. All the best, make the most of your trips home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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