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sazm2k12

How to make the decision to stay or go

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Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Toots said:

Darwin certainly wouldn't be a place I could live in but many people enjoy life in the tropics.  The main reason @sazm2k12 has posted is she wants to move back home to the UK to be much closer to her family especially now that she has a very young child.  It wouldn't make much difference if she moved to another part of Australia -  not when she is missing he family in the UK so badly.

I understand this. However one's circumstances can change, and perhaps a move back home may no longer become feasible in the short-to-medium term. Should that become the case, I'm suggesting a change in scenery to a place they may enjoy more could help, at least in part, ease the feeling of homesickness until they are able to relocate overseas.

Edited by Canada2Australia
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Hi OP, I was the same as you, never really really “settled” before baby but thought Aus was ok and worth it to be with hubby. After baby number 1, mother in UK with breast cancer (thankfully fully recovered) and father with kidney cancer (sadly passed) the pull home became unbearable and when the time came to get back on the plane to Aus I couldn’t do it. It was awful and led to the breakdown of my relationship but in my experience those nagging feelings are nagging for a reason, don’t ignore them.

If your husband wants to return too I wouldn’t wait. You could always rent your Aus place out? In 4 years who knows what your situation will be...don’t wait. 4 years is a long time to want to be somewhere else.

feel free to PM me of you want.Best of luck xx
 

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Darwin is so different from the rest of Australia though- 90% of us would find it difficult to live there ,even Aussies. Not saying it is nasty ( most definitely not)but it is so very hot and just so very unlike anywhere else. Hats off to you for surviving there so far !

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15 hours ago, starlight7 said:

Darwin is so different from the rest of Australia though- 90% of us would find it difficult to live there ,even Aussies. Not saying it is nasty ( most definitely not)but it is so very hot and just so very unlike anywhere else. Hats off to you for surviving there so far !

Yep. Been up to Darwin loads of times on work trips. June, July nice, rest of the time bearable and that's when work are paying for good hotels, good restaurants. Stay at the Holiday Inn, the one with the 50m outdoor pool.

Couldn't live there.

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On 03/03/2020 at 00:40, Antipodista said:

Hi OP, I was the same as you, never really really “settled” before baby but thought Aus was ok and worth it to be with hubby. After baby number 1, mother in UK with breast cancer (thankfully fully recovered) and father with kidney cancer (sadly passed) the pull home became unbearable and when the time came to get back on the plane to Aus I couldn’t do it. It was awful and led to the breakdown of my relationship but in my experience those nagging feelings are nagging for a reason, don’t ignore them.

If your husband wants to return too I wouldn’t wait. You could always rent your Aus place out? In 4 years who knows what your situation will be...don’t wait. 4 years is a long time to want to be somewhere else.

feel free to PM me of you want.Best of luck xx
 

I’m so sorry to hear about your dad Antipodista and that your relationship broke down. I definitely am with you on 4 years being so long! I don’t blame you for not being able to get back on that plane. It’s a shame because Oz is such an amazing place and will always have a piece of my heart but to me family is so much more important xx

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Darwin is definitely a place you either love or hate! We have loved it because it is so different and it has been quite kind to us - work is really easy to get up here and we love the tropical holiday feel. I definitely know it’s not a forever place for us though!

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On 29/02/2020 at 22:31, sazm2k12 said:

I’m sorry to hear that LKC but glad to hear you have had a good experience overall. Interestingly hubby has spoken about moving to Scotland. We have spoken about that or the South West (we are originally from Manchester area). 

I knew I didn't want to move back to where we'd moved to Aus from (Suffolk - just sort of ended up there after uni), or where ex's family (Kent) or mine (Birmingham) were from. We looked at Bath/Bristol area, Yorkshire, Northumberland, Lancashire areas, and Scotland. Scotland just ticked more boxes, and ex was offered work, so it all fell into place. I still can't believe that I found this place from the other side of the world 😁 Life is good, and we have been made more than welcome here, so I would definitely recommend Scotland. I know that a couple of other members/ex members of PIO have had similar experiences.

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Bonnie Scotland is the prettiest place in UK.  A standard of living and way of life way beyond anything they have away out there.  Scenery and endless miles of pristine unspoilt clean deserted beaches to die for. Highly recommended. 

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5 hours ago, Home and Happy said:

Bonnie Scotland is the prettiest place in UK.  A standard of living and way of life way beyond anything they have away out there.  Scenery and endless miles of pristine unspoilt clean deserted beaches to die for. Highly recommended. 

I'm originally from Scotland so I'm inclined to agree with you. 😉  My sister lives right in the middle of Edinburgh and has just returned after spending 3 months with us here in Tasmania.  She is a city person through and through but she thoroughly enjoys her visits to Tassie.  It's not a big place but there is some lovely scenery and pristine waters at unspoilt beaches - no crowds either.

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