sazm2k12

Thank you Tjsmum. Luckily we have our citizenship so could always come back. We have started to discuss a move in about 12 months but not sure if that is feasible with covid now. The homesickness is still here worse than ever. It’s my little girls birthday on Tuesday and it feels so sad having nobody to celebrate with (we are allowed to have gatherings up here now) and even though I met some nice mums through mums group I don’t have any close friends I would invite over.

Darwin is definitely a place you either love or hate! We have loved it because it is so different and it has been quite kind to us - work is really easy to get up here and we love the tropical holiday feel. I definitely know it’s not a forever place for us though!

I’m so sorry to hear about your dad Antipodista and that your relationship broke down. I definitely am with you on 4 years being so long! I don’t blame you for not being able to get back on that plane. It’s a shame because Oz is such an amazing place and will always have a piece of my heart but to me family is so much more important xx

Lovely! It just be beautiful there! Unfortunately it’s even further away for us from family so we wouldn’t move there but if we were staying in Oz we would pick tassie!

I’m sorry to hear that LKC but glad to hear you have had a good experience overall. Interestingly hubby has spoken about moving to Scotland. We have spoken about that or the South West (we are originally from Manchester area).

I am pleased it was all so smooth for you and you are feeling settled! I totally agree about happiness!

Toots we are in Darwin! Where are you?

Home and Happy the house market is super flat where we live now and one worry is we won’t be able to sell or will sell at a loss. My husband is hoping it picks up in 4 years but I’m not optimistic! how have you found the move back to England? Do you have any regrets?

Thank you everyone, I appreciate the feedback. My husband wants to be back in the UK eventually as he misses lots about England. He is just more head and I am more heart. He wants to save money and work towards it whereas I would rather just get on with it. We don’t really have any savings and own a house in Oz so me just wanting to get on with it probably isn’t very well thought out unless we have jobs lined up. I just don’t think I’ll ever fully be happy here and never fully able to put roots down as I’ll always be thinking what if we move back. My parents aren’t getting any younger too and I want my daughter to grow up around her family as I had a big family growing up and lots of lovely memories. For those who moved back, did you get a job first? Do you mind me asking how much you saved? We could live with my parents at least temporarily.

Thank you Marisa. Have you made the move back yourself? My baby is almost 2 now and it has been very very tough. I am going to seek help from a counsellor but I agree with you. My husband gets long service leave in 4 years but really I don’t think it’s worth 4 years of unhappiness for a small amount of money.

My husband and I have been in Oz for 10 years this year. Overall we have a lovely life here (it’s taken time), we bought a house in 2017 and welcomed our baby girl in 2018. The tug has always been there to move back home but lately it has gotten so much stronger and I’m not coping well as a sleep deprived mother without my family close by. I just wondered how you made the decision to move? My husband wants to wait another 4 years but for me that is too long to be unhappy. I’ve really struggled with the transition to being a mum without my own mum close by. The guilt of being so far away is also quite terrible and how much they are missing out on. On the other hand I didn’t particularly love life in the UK and I know Australia offers us a lot and our baby girl is thriving here. I have tried hard to make new friends and I do have some good friends here but it’s not the same as my family. Id love to hear from anyone who has been through this or has any advice?

Hi Blobby, I just don't know what else we can do though re travel back home. I get 4 weeks annual leave a year and a trip back to the UK takes up 3 of those weeks. For the first 2 years we didn't travel back home at all but then over the last 2 years my sister has got married and had a baby and now my best friend is getting married and my sister is having another baby. Why do you regret the decision to move back? Did you prefer life in Oz?

Thanks everyone. I actually completed an undergraduate degree in English in the UK and then did the Graduate Diploma in Law (Law Conversion Course) which means in England I wouldn't need to do a law degree if I went back - I would need to do an LPC though and somehow find a training contract (which is very competitive). Out here though it isn't recognised so I've had to do a full Australian law degree although I've been given some exemptions for the study I already did in the UK. I have just over a year left of full-time study in Australia and then a PLT course I would have to do which takes a minimum of 5 months. Not sure if I should just finish it anyway to keep my options open. At the moment I'm feeling very deflated about life in Oz but I'm not sure if its because of everything I've been through with my job and the way I was treated or if I would genuinely be happier back home. I also don't feel like I'm done with Australia and I feel like in a few years I would want to come back. For those who wouldn't be able to live in Darwin and have suggested trying a different city would you mind telling me why you think Darwin is so hard? I have also been told by a friend that before we leave we should definitely try another Australian city and we have been thinking of Perth for some time.

I posted on here a few months ago about moving home to the UK and we felt it was the right decision but then changed our mind. The problem is we are really struggling to reach a decision and I'm really scared of doing something I'll regret. It would really be good to hear from somebody who has been through the same thing and how they reached a decision and if they moved back and regretted it. We live in Darwin and even though I love Darwin people are constantly leaving and its been hard to make a steady group of friends. I've had a really difficult 2 years at work and this has really impacted on my personal life and caused me to be depressed. I now have a great new job to go to but I feel like all of the work problems have taken it out of me and I don't have the energy anymore. I also enrolled at university about a year ago and have been studying part-time and getting really good marks. I eventually want to qualify as a solicitor and I believe this is achievable in Australia. I have doubts if I would be able to qualify in the UK - I've been travelling and living overseas now for almost 5 years and would be up against new graduates and those who have been working in UK law firms for a few years. My self-esteem is also very low and I'm not even sure how I would come across in an interview anymore. My fiancé and I are nearly 30 now as well and the thought of going back home and starting at the bottom again when all of our friends have houses and good jobs scares me. Our reasons for wanting to move back are that we have both been quite homesick over the last year and missed a lot about the UK and our family. We also know that we don't want to live in Australia for ever and when we decide to start a family we will move back to be closer to family. We both love to travel and ironically living in Australia has meant we can do hardly any (we thought it would be the opposite) as all of our trips are spent going back to the UK for weddings or new family members being born etc. On the other hand though we both have reasonably good jobs here now and have managed to save good money. We are supposed to be getting married in August 2016 and moving home would definitely mean we would have to postpone our wedding. I also feel like it would be a waste having endured a job I have hated for 2 years to get our permanent residence only to leave and don't want us leaving to be me running away from the bad situation I was in with work. Would people suggest me giving my new job a chance and/or even trying out a new city in Australia? I am worried the grass is always greener and we are just viewing the UK from our trips home where everyone makes an effort and we don't have to go to work. I look back to when I was in the UK and I seemed to have so much energy and in Darwin I've got into a complete rut. In the UK I was constantly doing things, running, charity work, weekends away with friends. Here I barely get out of bed at the weekends and I know this is partly to do with the job and the depression and anxiety it has caused but I want to feel like my old self again. We applied for our citizenship early this month so will at least wait for that to go through but if we are moving back the process will take some time anyway (selling cars, furniture, cancelling all of our contracts etc) and I'd rather just get on with it. The same with if we are going to move interstate.

Thanks thinker, I had to attach a letter outlining everything with my citizenship application and I included evidence of the date I applied etc. If they ask for more information I can show them a log of the repeated emails and telephone calls we made to them as well. Its really annoying because we were just unlucky in that we applied for our 187 visa during that timeframe that there was a system error. It already caused us a lot of stress at the time (my partner nearly lost his job because he didn't have a valid work visa, and it was right in the run up to Xmas) and now it is coming back to haunt us!

Yea I've got an email from immigration stating that due to system errors they are unable to grant bridging visas for applications lodged between 27 October and 23 November. That's all I have really though proving it...

Has anybody applied for their citizenship and had to use the administrative error category to ask the minister to exercise discretion? We have been in Oz 4 years yesterday (first 2 years on a working holiday visa, then rest on a bridging and 187 visa) and went to apply for our citizenship but it kept saying we weren't eligible. I called immigration and it turns out we are not technically eligible. This is because when we applied for our 187 visa there was an error with immigration granting our bridging visa (there was a period of about 4 days where everyone who lodged their visa over this period did not get their bridging visas granted due to a system error). This meant that our working holiday visa expired on 3 December but our bridging visa was not approved until 18 December despite us putting in our 187 application in November so we had a period of time that we were not legally in Australia. Does anybody think this will be a problem? The way I see it we did everything we could to remain in Australia legally by applying for our visa on time and we were even calling immigration on a daily basis to find out what we should do etc and if we should leave the country but nobody was giving us an answer and just telling us to wait.

I am going through a similar thing and have been told by immigration to leave - obviously this is an informal conversation with the contact centre so its not that reliable but I spoke to two different people and they both told me the same thing. I was told that immigration can't force you to stay in a job and if its affecting your health (which it is mine) then you can leave but you need evidence which includes a diary and any medical records etc. One of the people I spoke to told me that the only way a permanent residence visa would be cancelled is if you have obtained it fraudulently. I am going to leave my job and it will be before the 2 years is up (although I've been there over 2 years if you count the time on my working holiday visa) so I will let you know what happens. I am just in the process of trying to find a new job hopefully in the same role in the same area.

Hi grey sky, depression is an illness. I have also explained to a doctor what has been happening and have been given sick notes - there is no issue with me getting these as I have been seeing a doctor regularly.

My company actually request medical certificates for all absences so I always have to go and see a doctor if I don't go into work. I agree that I need the time off before then but flights are booked back home for Easter already and we have committed to travelling home for a wedding so its not really a trip we can pull out of.

I'm sorry you had to go through a similar thing Alijane but its good it all worked out better. I hope things all work out for me and my partner in the end. I am going to start looking for jobs and applying now. My visa is 187 so I am technically a permanent resident although my conditions were to work for my employer for 2 years from the grant of the visa. By the time I have a new job sorted I will maybe be 5-6 months out so it will be a decision for immigration to make. It is clear my boss is not prepared to do anything and/or take things seriously. In a conversation earlier today he commented how work had permitted me to take 2 days off last week and haven't caused a fuss about it despite me being signed off with a doctors note for depression caused by workplace bullying. The person who has been making my life hell has also been taken out for lunch today as she is apparently unhappy and they are wanting to find out what is wrong and make sure she is happy. I am sure that her 'unhappiness' is just a reaction as she has sensed she could be in trouble for the way she has been treating me as she really is that sly. My boss has reassured me that they value me and has told me I'm an asset to the company but their actions are speaking otherwise. I also haven't had my boss approach me at all since being back to check how I am and to follow up on anything we discussed last week so its a huge slap in the face to see how they are taking the person who is causing me to feel like this' welfare more serious.

I know, I completely feel like my boss is trying to blame it on other issues as well outside of work when it is my job that is making me feel like this. I have followed it up again today and have recorded it in an email. I have stopped the medication as I know it is my job that is making me depressed.

Thanks everyone, I raised a few of the issues with my boss and took the time off sick (2 days last week) and told him how much work problems had been impacting on my personal life and my general wellbeing. He seemed like he was going to act on things initially and started being proactive for a whole day and acted concerned (although he did try and blame it on other things outside of work as well). He even said work would pay for me to speak to a counsellor but after being back in work for less than a day things have gone back to normal. I actually got through to somebody at immigration last week who suggested to me that my visa would only be cancelled if I have acted fraudulently and they certainly wouldn't make me stay somewhere that is impacting my health. This was a conversation though with a manager on their info line so I could obviously never rely on that if I were to leave my job and then my visa was to be cancelled. I can honestly say I wish I had never taken the sponsorship as this job has put me through hell and I have none of the support network I would have at home. The doctor prescribed me some medication but the side effects were really awful so I stopped taking it after a few days.

I went to see a doctor yesterday and was given a referral to a psychologist and also some anti-depressants. I phoned in work sick this morning, I just couldn't get out of bed and face going there the thought made me so scared. I called my employer and told him I wouldn't be coming in and he was really quite abrupt. He asked if I was unwell and I explained I was feeling very low and that I had been advised by my doctor to take a few days off work. Now I am wondering if I should have just said I had a stomach ache. My partner really wants me to just hand my notice in next week and leave and put ourselves at the mercy of immigration. The thought of even another day at my work never mind another 7 months really is unbearable. Would anyone really suggest not doing that though? I have read as much as I can and I believe I have made a genuine effort to stay but obviously immigration could take a completely different view. At this moment in time being sent back to the UK is better than living like this.

I unfortunately don't have any annual leave left to take off. I have 2 weeks booked at Xmas and 3 weeks at Easter which I have saved up over the last year. I don't have any allies at all, it is a 4 person office and too small to even have the opportunity to say anything to anyone. We have no union, no HR department, just a boss who pretends to address problems and brushes things over. I would have left this job a long time ago if I didn't want the visa, now I'm not even sure I want that anymore as just feel completely hopeless. The work load is bothering me less than the way I feel like I've been treated here. Things were bearable until last June and then another staff member started who was just as difficult so now I have it coming at me from 2 separate angles and I'm just exhausted by it all. I am supposed to delegate work to the new staff member and ever since she started it has been constant arguments and attitude and just a total power struggle as I don't think she likes taking orders from me for some unknown reason - not sure why as I'm older and more experienced than her so it can't be that I'm younger.