kiwiathome Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 I don't think its about nice or not shelly, I am nice, and you are super adorable. Just I think we should always go back to the poster, and check in how they are doing. Have we heard from those two upset men in a while? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 (edited) Mr blobby has posted twice on his or her own thread perhaps they busy ! Just keeping it alive for them lol and just for the record my hubby reads this forum he's not a member but he reads it lol ! And also my son is a member of this forum my UK son ! my husband tells me to keep off the forum because he said ya get conflict on forums but he also understands why I come on the forum ! And there's no harm in it ! Lol Edited June 22, 2015 by Shellybingobingo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 (edited) Just a few messages we've shared over last few days kiwi in Aus ! If we were unhappy together I don't think we would bother speak do you like I say I'm miserable being apart ! Not that I have to explain myself but I'm sure there's a few gossips putting 2 and 2 together and coming out with 10 ! Edited June 22, 2015 by ali screen shots removed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bound4Tassie Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 I've run out of buckets!! Shelly....no need lol! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
northernbird Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 I actually feel a bit sick! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 I actually feel a bit sick! Andrews should settle ya stomach Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blobby1000 Posted June 22, 2015 Author Share Posted June 22, 2015 Hi AllA lot of sensible, well meaning and useful comments to my postings. Thanks to everybody. Blobby, you got it right again. I don't want to live in a boring suburb! A couple of years ago I worked in Sydney in IT on contract (see posts in IT thread). Loved it and wanted OH to consider moving. She moved to HH to downsize from the rental we were in, which was a big house and garden. They wanted to put rent up and I suggested she downsize and move closer to work. Bu we have always lived in boring places and is one of the issues I face (as mentioned before). Leading on from that, a few replies suggest I talk it through with OH. I have. Many times, but the conversation dies. She always says, yes we will move sometime. It has been ongoing for 3 years at least . I want a plan and some action. We have been forced to move rental again as landlord is selling. Going to sunny Greensborough!!! Son works in Bundoora and wife still Heidelberg. Another practical move with promises we will think again once that is complete. So another year stuck in limbo. Probably a catalyst for my posting. A suggestion I might 'resent' her success in the job in some way is totally not right (no offence taken). I wish she would climb the greasy pole, earn more money, but she is from a socialist family (South Wales steel workers) and pretends to resent earning good money! She commits a lot of time and effort and should get rewarded for it. And no - its not about the money. Other comments suggest counseling. We get on, its just become too comfortable and a bit of a rut. I will always speak out if things aren't going well and have done so this time around. Like I say, always promises to do something, but nothing more. OH will not leave our son, I am pretty convinced of that. He has turned a corner, but she still worries he might 'fall' again. As for volunteering, tried that. If I spoke to anybody and said I was looking for a job, the more interesting recruiters didn't want to know, especially if I had an interview lined up. They want 6 months commitment. And can you believe, I actually got a reject email applying for the salvo's doing basic shop work !! Strange but true. I started a casual job helping older people set up technology and use the internet. Paid for a police check. I got one assignment in a month. The next one a month later, they wanted me to go to Lalor with no expenses paid. I said it was a bit far and they suggested I quit! As for sport, since being in Aus I have given up. Cannot stand the blatant bias towards Ozzie sport. Need to watch without sound of the commentary. The news will say 'Ricaarrdo(?) finishes 5th in Grand Prix' and won't mention anybody else. Never got into AFL. I do keep fit, jog, walk, weights bench. Got a fitbit (just for the steps) and watch my diet. Not been slimmer since my 20's, no belly and visible biceps! If anything I need to stop losing weight. I'm not (really) a miserable person. I just want to look at the present / future and feel some contentment. No real ambition (which isn't a negative). I have traveled a lot of the world when younger and don't wish for that, more a yearning to settle down. Happy to do that with wife and son. Just not sure on the where, when and how. Life is what you make of it and I don't want it to be a daily, boring, grind. It doesn't need to be for us. Anyway, this thread seems to be hijacked by me. I've said a lot in 'public' which is not really my nature (no, I don't bottle it up - but as mentioned no friends in Aus to moan to). I hovered over the send button and did pull the trigger. So probably no more long replies. Thanks to everybody for showing an interest, your suggestions and sharing. Hi Davlap, i havent read any posts past this one yet so I may be repeating what others said. But it's almost my bed time and I wanted to reply to you! Really you are echoing a lot of what I said when I lived in GREENSBOROUGH! (See my post "Melbourne Smells" it was quite notorious and got a lot of replies and really kept me going through the tough times!!!) Anyway I get what you are saying about Aussie sport. It really got on my tits. What you say about them mentioning the 5th placed Aussie (or even the 25th placed) but not the winner is SPOT ON! Do you remember the Olympics! The Aussies under performed so they just said (on tele and radio, papers etc...all media coverage in general) 'we don't like the Olympics! It's not real sport!" And then They started saying "the Sydney Olympics were much better than this!" Quite simply Australians are the worst losers in the world and that is annoying! But does it really matter!? When I was there I said YES but now I think : why couldn't I have just laughed at that! Well because really I think being able to lose is a skill that is required in a sensible society.... But anyway! When we look back on our 2 years....we wished the first year (in GREENSBOROUGH) away and then headed to Torquay. But now, looking back, we preferred that first year. G'boro is not much cop, and you could have picked much better places, it's a boring suburb but it is safe and there are a few nice parks...I'd say it's one of the better northern suburbs, but is it worth travelling across the world for? Certainly not.....but if you go into URBAN GROOVES say hi to Manuel from us (he won't remember!) but it's a great cafe on the Main Street! But the good thing about GREENSBOROUGH is it's so near so many nice places....But I guess you were near them, in Heidelberg. Personally I'd have gone to Warrendyte. It's much nicer and more character, yes, more expensive, but it's worth it I reckon as it feels like you are somewhere different to the UK and the people are pretty chilled out and friendly...that's where we would go back to (but we won't!) Anyway what was the point of my post? Oh yes...I remember... My mum and her elderly, rather thin, always on the toilet, friend came over in 2011 when we were in GREENSBOROUGH, I spent three weeks telling them how crap it was whilst taking them to 3 weeks worth of truly amazing places, all within driving distance. I wish I'd stopped to think...actually this is quite good! But I kept saying..there is only 3 weeks worth of good stuff and then You just have to repeat things,.,.. Well...now back in the UK we repeat stuff all the time! We go on holiday to the same place, I take my dogs on the same walk, we take the kids to the same park, we cycle on the same tracks, we drink in the same pubs, we eat in the same restaurants, we get our Chinese from the same takeaway....that's life....it's what we do! Somehow we expected to have it different in Australia....but it's still just life and you can't have exitement every minute! anywaay I get what you are saying and I hope you find peace in whatever you do. 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blobby1000 Posted June 22, 2015 Author Share Posted June 22, 2015 Hi blobby1000, there are some interesting comments in your OP that struck me and I am wondering why no one else is highlighting this so I wonder if I am missing the point? You have listed several very positive things that you are currently experiencing in England yet you question whether it was really worth going back for after being very unhappy in Aus. Then you list several things you miss about Aus....yet these seem to be the things you disliked in the first place (for example you say one positive for England is swimming without the fear of being eaten, yet you miss 'trying not to get eaten by sharks'! Forgive me as I don't want to sound rude but this all sounds like you're moaning for the sake of moaning? You actually remind me of my husband; a very 'grass is greener' type, and it certainly is the curse of the expat and I've no doubt my husband will never completely be happy with the choices he/we make! It sounds like you have a very nice existence in England and chasing a dream of Aus when you didn't like it in the first place, it seems like you have a lot to risk, especially with children involved?! I certainly do not want to be a hypocrite as I am a 'ping ponger' myself and am currently planning my 2nd return to UK, but honestly I wouldn't wish this on anyone and I would encourage you to think strongly about what you risk losing and gaining in moving again, and the justifications you have for doing so. Having said that I would never discourage someone from pinging back as only you can make that decision and sometimes once you've got an idea in your head you have to follow it regardless of people pointing the obvious out to you! You may find if you don't give it another go you'll eventually grow to hate all the great things going on for you in UK! For us, in hindsight I wish we had given ourselves longer to settle in the UK because one theory could suggest that we would be very happy now! On the flip side, if we had never come back to Aus we probably would have grown more and more unhappy and who knows what might have actually happened? Although I wish we'd stayed put, I do hypothesise that my husband would probably have grown to resent our children for holding him back and ultimately ending in our divorce!! The point is you can't predict the future! Good luck with whichever decision you make! im not moaning for the sake of it....I'm just demonstrating the complexity of my mind!!! Haha and Hoping that this will help others in a similar position my pros and cons are certainly contradictory..,the whole thing is contradictory! i never claimed to make any sense (or at least I hope I didn't!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 Just a few messages we've shared over last few days kiwi in Aus ! If we were unhappy together I don't think we would bother speak do you like I say I'm miserable being apart ! Not that I have to explain myself but I'm sure there's a few gossips putting 2 and 2 together and coming out with 10 ! Shelly, I've removed the screenshots - they were taking over the whole page/thread Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 22, 2015 Share Posted June 22, 2015 Shelly, I've removed the screenshots - they were taking over the whole page/thread Thanks lol that's ok I would of removed them myself if I knew how to ! I was a bit peed of at the time of posting sorry ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwiathome Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 I've only just come back on so don't know what screen shots have been removed or what you mean by gossips and making 10 etc Shelly, I did not know upset was going on. My intention was to be factual not personal, I apologise if I upset you. I just do prefer it when the threads stay more on track. Just my opinion. I am not seeking anyone's agreement or trying to upset. Now, just wondering if anyone else is having strange things going on with this forum?????? I am getting words changed, weird errors and links to newspapers and odd stuff going on. I seem to have some windows error with this. I am going to do a virus check. Anyone else getting odd things or just my computer??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 (edited) It's ok kiwi in oz , I got a bit peed off because I would never ever say that about anyone's marriage , I have been with my husband from 14 with a little split before we got married ! There is no way on this earth we r unhappy ! That's y I went mad ! I worship the ground he walks on ! I'm very protective of my husband ! Lol sloppy or not that's the way it is haha ! And my husband is protective of me ! His sister said something that offended me back in UK ! I told him and he had a word with his mum to basically tell her button it lol but my husband will say it properly to people he's a bit more tactful than me lol and he knows I'm fiery and I shoot from the hip kinda girl if I'm upset lol but he does love that about me although sometimes it's not a good thing lol anyway forget it no hard feelings ! ! ! And I don't realise I did take it off track lol I have read back through it blobby ticked like on my post so Clearly he understood what I was saying haha ! ! i think I'll stay off from now on off the forum , my hubby dislikes forums anyway ! Everyone has a opinion and it will cause conflict lol ! So I wish u all the best in ya travels kiwi ! Whatever u decide ! I I will not be bothering with the forum no more I'll let people carry on ! I have a sense of humour aswell and I think some hate ya for it but I'm not going change who I am people who know me know it's me and love everything about me lol so good luck I hope ya have a great life in UK I'm sure you will Edited June 23, 2015 by Shellybingobingo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwiathome Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 I don't really understand, I never said anything about your marriage. Am a bit confused as to what is going on and think you have taken this out of proportion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 (edited) I don't really understand, I never said anything about your marriage. Am a bit confused as to what is going on and think you have taken this out of proportion. It doesn't really matter kiwi but u did say if I love my husband so much y am I on Pio so much lol ! And u said ya not so sure I am happy lol ! It's ok though I'm not a funnie Bugga I won't hold a grudge for long ! I'm fine now just forget it ! ! ! ! My kids and my hubby r my life quite sensitive if people judge them lol ! Anyway it's a forum shouldn't let it get to us ! Lol Edited June 23, 2015 by Shellybingobingo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 Anyway stop taking it of track haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ramot Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 Always best not to get too personal on threads (have learn't the hard way) or take offence. Often the written word doesn't come across as intended. Chill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Pom Queen Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 I have just read the thread, a few posts were deleted by the mods for being personal, unfortunately this was then posted again although edited. @Shellybingobingo post away I'm sure Blobby doesn't mind one bit and as admin it doesn't bother me one bit as long as you don't post more snap shots of your text messages about your hubby's private parts :tongue: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 I have just read the thread, a few posts were deleted by the mods for being personal, unfortunately this was then posted again although edited. @Shellybingobingo post away I'm sure Blobby doesn't mind one bit and as admin it doesn't bother me one bit as long as you don't post more snap shots of your text messages about your hubby's private parts :tongue: Lol ok sorry ! I thought it were quite funnie though but then I av a wicked sense of humour lol thanks ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Pom Queen Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 Lol ok sorry ! I thought it were quite funnie though but then I av a wicked sense of humour lol thanks ! We just have to remember we are a family forum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 We just have to remember we are a family forum. sorry won't do it again lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiwiathome Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 The only posts I have put on this thread, are the ones you see. The moderators have deleted nothing from me. I have not said anything about your marriage or husband Shelly and I take offence to you keep going on that I have. I have enjoyed the relevant topics on this thread, and I do prefer to keep the topic about the poster. But I give up. It does go off track and people do squabble. You do not need to unsubscribe Shelly because I am. Please stay on this forum as I know you enjoy it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Pom Queen Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 The only posts I have put on this thread, are the ones you see. The moderators have deleted nothing from me. I have not said anything about your marriage or husband Shelly and I take offence to you keep going on that I have. I have enjoyed the relevant topics on this thread, and I do prefer to keep the topic about the poster. But I give up. It does go off track and people do squabble. You do not need to unsubscribe Shelly because I am. Please stay on this forum as I know you enjoy it. @kiwiinaus a post of yours was deleted by the mods where you said if she loved her husband so much why was she on here as much or something similar. Anyway let's forget this now and yes we can get back on topic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blobby1000 Posted June 23, 2015 Author Share Posted June 23, 2015 Glad my threads can still include a bit of drama even from 10,000 miles away! my advice though, is stop squabbling ladies and get out and enjoy the sunshine! I'm sure you both have perfect marriages just like me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 Glad my threads can still include a bit of drama even from 10,000 miles away! my advice though, is stop squabbling ladies and get out and enjoy the sunshine! I'm sure you both have perfect marriages just like me! Im not squabbling I quite like kiwi in Aus lol she actually makes me laugh when I read her posts usually ! I hope she comes back on don't leave on my account it's a forum after all ! In text form I think it's very difficult to get across what ya trying to say without it sounding wrong ! Well it is to me anyway lol I read the intellectual posts too and thinking what they on about what's that word mean I'm finding myself googling it haha I wouldn't of been bothered about anything like that back home lol ! I read the Muslim bashing posts and political ones haven't got a clue what they on about but it passed a few hrs lol I still Google if a words to big for me though or ring my hubby and ask him what it means lol I'm fine I hope kiwi is too I think she's quite funnie actually ! ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davlap Posted June 23, 2015 Share Posted June 23, 2015 (edited) Hi Davlap, Somehow we expected to have it different in Australia....but it's still just life and you can't have exitement every minute! anywaay I get what you are saying and I hope you find peace in whatever you do. Hi Blobby. What you say I fully agree with. However, the main point is that I WANT to change my lifestyle, I thought that's why we came here. But we have just slipped into the 9-5 grind living in a boring suburb. The suburbs we live in are boring, but convenient for work. Now I can't get a job, am getting older, this daily grind holds a bleak future for me.The problem I have is that wife and son don't seem to want to change. They come home from work, wife slouches in front of TV and son goes into his room to play xbox. Even when I was working I hated that. I don't want a couple of hours at the footie (don't like it anyway), a meal out once a week and the occasional weekend away, trying to find some pointless hobby. Always looking for a reward to make up for the grind. I want to wake up everyday looking forward to it. As mentioned, I have many of the stereotypical hang ups about Aus that a lot of Brits do. I don't like the Aus culture (or lack of) and don't see myself becoming an Aus. I have lost some mojo / inner happiness whatever. since being here I have disengaged and withdrawn. It doesn't feel like I belong. This has probably been exacerbated by not being able to get a job and onset of old age I do think Aus is a beautiful country and I still like the weather. So I am willing to have a go somewhere where we can appreciate the beauty and weather more. Its an achievable dream. Without that, I don't think I want to be here any more. It may not succeed, but not doing anything is too frightening to consider. Would the UK be any better? Don't know, but it might restore some of what I have lost within myself. Edited June 23, 2015 by davlap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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