Please help, the biggest decision of my life!

[wattsy1982]

From our experience you only gain the knowledge, feelings and understanding you need prior to going...once you made the move. sods law I guess.

 

You dont truly appreciate the value of family, friends and home until youve moved. If you knew this before you wouldnt move.

[calNgary]

We migrated a few years ago with 2 kids and we have never looked back. Yes its hard work and messes with your heart strings but it can certainly be worth it once your settled.

I know earlier in the thread Trade licencing was mentioned and for a plumber this can be a nightmare, so research well specifically for the State you are moving too as it can cost a bit and there's lots of nice hoops to jump through!! You will need the licence to get decent wages.

 

Cal x

[Kimbodia]

I love this thread, great comments and advice. I love the push off of 'better life for the kids' etc etc. Though I guess everyone's circumstances are different and their hopes of gain etc differ.

 

My husband and I are currently planning to take the plunge in the next year or 2. We backpacked in Australia 13 years ago, never been since. Its something we've talked about doing on and off ever since. Aside from that we've always loved the idea of living and working in another country. I don't expect paradise, or a hot UK. The push for us is personal discontentment in our life here, we don't loathe the UK but do feel stuck in a rut here. We hope a warmer climate will help us enjoy life more, though of course we may find the warmer climate a negative at times!

 

I often wonder of the finding out what you value when you've removed yourself from it. Both my husband and I often feel our families can be a bit of a burden to us, so many family obligations, family politics etc. I think how lovely to escape it all and then have a little voice in my head saying you'll miss it all when you don't have it!!!

 

For us, we've decided to go for it because with hubby now 38 its a sort of now or never, the children are still quite young at 6 and 3 and we simply feel there isn't really anything stopping us. We've moved house twice since having our youngest and now we're planning this. I do find it a huge upheavel and wonder when we'll eventually feel settled again, as we both yearn to move into a home and just know that we're not moving for a long time, if ever. Though we feel strongly that we want an exciting change in our lives and feel we'll most definitely regret it if we don't go for it now.

 

We wonder about taking our children away from family and giving them sunshine instead, a funny trade off! Though there are strains in the family and as a result they'd never be incredibly close to my family anyway but could probably still enjoy relationships with cousins. On the other side of the family, its the usual personality clashes, nothing major and everyone gets on but hubby and I feel like we don't quite sit right here.

 

We intend to embrace Australia and everything it offers, we want to throw ourselves into all things Australia, make friends with them and do it as they do it rather than try and stick our heels in and do it the way we did in the UK. We want to give it our best shot and hope that we can make it a successful move, I intend to stay for citizenship and hopefully forever but at least focus on citizenship in the short term. We intend to make a pact, haven't got to the point of doing so officially yet but my view is I don't even intend to speak of the 'are you happy' 'have we made the right decision' for a few years at least. I just want to throw ourselves into life there as much as possible and if its good then great and if its not we plug away at trying to make it good, and then hopefully great!! I don't intend to take my children (or us) to the other side of the world with half a heart nor tell the kids we've made a boo boo and are going back home!!

 

Anyway, I'm rambling. But really felt on the same wavelength of you other posters and wanted to add my own comment

[rkdowner]

Thank You all for commenting, I appreciate everyone's views. I used the words 'better life for the children' etc out of ease really, perhaps I should explain more. We live in Birmingham, not a bad part of Birmingham, but it's not where we imagined ourselves settling although we both grew up here. When we went travelling 9 years ago we went on a world trip, including travelling round Australia. We always said when we came back that if we were backpacking around Birmingham at the time, we'd have got the next bus straight out of there! Although it's improved a lot, we don't feel like Birmingham is the place for us, not enough going on, crap weather (like most of UK I suppose), theres not a lot of community feel etc. My husband thinks living in Australia will give the kids better prospects because its not as overpopulated as UK, the education system is supposed to be better, the weather, generally better- enabling us to spend more time outdoors and not stuck inside like what tends to happen on a cold, drizzly day in Birmingham, also he feels that most (and this is a generalisation) Aussies are quite positive, and have a bit more of 'get up and go' about them. I suppose what we are fed up of in Birmingham are the chavs (bogens?? equivalent Aussie term??), the negativity of some people, the fact that everyone is also worried about being politically correct all the time, and the overcrowding. So, would anyone say that the things my husband believes to be about Australia is correct? We are not naive people, we know that life is what you make it and there are ups and downs to every country you live. I too have thought that by moving the other side of the world I am perhaps giving my children a good future, but a future without their family, and that's what I find the hardest to deal with. My husband has set up a very good business here and is extremely good at what he does, so I know he would be determined to make it work overseas, but I do think we could be silly to give up what we have here. I am still no closer to making a decision but at least I have a good insight into things so thanks again for everyone's input.

[starlight7]

Well good luck rk- whatever you decide.

[Quoll]

Thank You all for commenting, I appreciate everyone's views. I used the words 'better life for the children' etc out of ease really, perhaps I should explain more. We live in Birmingham, not a bad part of Birmingham, but it's not where we imagined ourselves settling although we both grew up here. When we went travelling 9 years ago we went on a world trip, including travelling round Australia. We always said when we came back that if we were backpacking around Birmingham at the time, we'd have got the next bus straight out of there! Although it's improved a lot, we don't feel like Birmingham is the place for us, not enough going on, crap weather (like most of UK I suppose), theres not a lot of community feel etc. My husband thinks living in Australia will give the kids better prospects because its not as overpopulated as UK, the education system is supposed to be better, the weather, generally better- enabling us to spend more time outdoors and not stuck inside like what tends to happen on a cold, drizzly day in Birmingham, also he feels that most (and this is a generalisation) Aussies are quite positive, and have a bit more of 'get up and go' about them. I suppose what we are fed up of in Birmingham are the chavs (bogens?? equivalent Aussie term??), the negativity of some people, the fact that everyone is also worried about being politically correct all the time, and the overcrowding. So, would anyone say that the things my husband believes to be about Australia is correct? We are not naive people, we know that life is what you make it and there are ups and downs to every country you live. I too have thought that by moving the other side of the world I am perhaps giving my children a good future, but a future without their family, and that's what I find the hardest to deal with. My husband has set up a very good business here and is extremely good at what he does, so I know he would be determined to make it work overseas, but I do think we could be silly to give up what we have here. I am still no closer to making a decision but at least I have a good insight into things so thanks again for everyone's input.

 

Pity it's not as clear cut as he thinks I reckon. You don't have to move to the other side of the world to get away from Birmingham!

 

Aus is heavily populated in the areas where the population lives - sure it's a big place but most of it is uninhabitable so most people live in cities - big cities (at great expense).

 

You get chavs/bogans/immigrants/irritants of whatever persuasion pretty much everywhere.

 

Unemployment is on the rise in Aus, on the decline in UK and TBH I really don't think there is that much more of a "get up and go" attitude there than there is here really. There are jobsworths in both places, go getters in both places and poor sods who need two jobs to pay the mortgage in both places too. Don't underestimate the power of the "nudge nudge wink wink" environment. Getting yourself back into an inner circle of old boys can be a huge challenge!

 

Hmmm the old "stuck inside on a wet day" mantra. I'm one of those who find the UK weather infinitely preferable - at least you can dress for it! I spent months each year stuck inside with curtains and windows closed keeping either the heat or the cold out in Aus. I could barely walk a mile I was so dreadfully unfit. Now I walk 8-10 miles most days and in the last 3+ yrs can count on my fingers the numbers of days I've been prevented from doing what I want when I want (maybe Cambridge is just perfect I dunno!). Lots of parents are paranoid about their kids playing outside in the sun - sunscreen, hats, sunnies, the works. My granddaughters could not get over being able to play outside on the grass when they've been here. I know some people like the heat - I did in small doses once!

 

Political Correctness is alive and well in Aus especially Canberra where most of the population are well PC brainwashed (personally I see less of it here) but now that the Libs are back, hopefully it might diminish a bit.

 

Education at the end of the day, much of a muchness. One first world country much like any other. Kids aren't disadvantaged on the world stage with an Aus degree (neither are they with a UK degree!)

 

Community feel - that's one thing I definitely missed in Aus, the land of the remote garage opener. I live in a great community here, the difference is palpable. However I've lived so long in a place where the community spirit was absent I'm not as good at throwing myself into things here - my problem I know. There are zillions of threads on here about Aus friendships or the lack thereof. After 32 yrs in Aus i don't count any long term Aus friends at all. I have a couple of good mates but they're both long term expats like myself, both stuck in Aus and unable to return. Having been burned too often I've had acquaintances, most of whom were in it for what they could get out of me rather than what they could put into a friendship!

 

A move out of Birmingham would be cheaper. You don't have to go across the world to fix that! You're right not to underestimate the impact of a distant family - my now adult sons have said they wish they had been closer to their UK family. But as a growing family we were incredibly self sufficient and very selfish. We thought we were doing the right thing but if I had my time again I would do things differently I think. My boys are very self sufficient but rather a tad too selfish in the scheme of things I fear (their wives are doing their best LOL!). Being a grandparent via Skype sucks TBH but I don't think my granddaughters really notice now as children, but it will be interesting to see what they think as adults.

 

However, if you want an adventure, are prepared to gamble a lot of money/social connectedness then go for it. Nothing is forever and your kids are young enough that if it wasn't floating your boat you could return. You've got a better than even chance it will work.

[bristolman]

Thank You all for commenting, I appreciate everyone's views. I used the words 'better life for the children' etc out of ease really, perhaps I should explain more. We live in Birmingham, not a bad part of Birmingham, but it's not where we imagined ourselves settling although we both grew up here. When we went travelling 9 years ago we went on a world trip, including travelling round Australia. We always said when we came back that if we were backpacking around Birmingham at the time, we'd have got the next bus straight out of there! Although it's improved a lot, we don't feel like Birmingham is the place for us, not enough going on, crap weather (like most of UK I suppose), theres not a lot of community feel etc. My husband thinks living in Australia will give the kids better prospects because its not as overpopulated as UK, the education system is supposed to be better, the weather, generally better- enabling us to spend more time outdoors and not stuck inside like what tends to happen on a cold, drizzly day in Birmingham, also he feels that most (and this is a generalisation) Aussies are quite positive, and have a bit more of 'get up and go' about them. I suppose what we are fed up of in Birmingham are the chavs (bogens?? equivalent Aussie term??), the negativity of some people, the fact that everyone is also worried about being politically correct all the time, and the overcrowding. So, would anyone say that the things my husband believes to be about Australia is correct? We are not naive people, we know that life is what you make it and there are ups and downs to every country you live. I too have thought that by moving the other side of the world I am perhaps giving my children a good future, but a future without their family, and that's what I find the hardest to deal with. My husband has set up a very good business here and is extremely good at what he does, so I know he would be determined to make it work overseas, but I do think we could be silly to give up what we have here. I am still no closer to making a decision but at least I have a good insight into things so thanks again for everyone's input.

 

I am afraid your husband seems to have a somewhat idealistic view of Australia and Australians. That is normal in this situation but not entirely realistic I'm afraid.

[Bungo]

Thank You all for commenting, I appreciate everyone's views. I used the words 'better life for the children' etc out of ease really, perhaps I should explain more. We live in Birmingham, not a bad part of Birmingham, but it's not where we imagined ourselves settling although we both grew up here. When we went travelling 9 years ago we went on a world trip, including travelling round Australia. We always said when we came back that if we were backpacking around Birmingham at the time, we'd have got the next bus straight out of there! Although it's improved a lot, we don't feel like Birmingham is the place for us, not enough going on, crap weather (like most of UK I suppose), theres not a lot of community feel etc. My husband thinks living in Australia will give the kids better prospects because its not as overpopulated as UK, the education system is supposed to be better, the weather, generally better- enabling us to spend more time outdoors and not stuck inside like what tends to happen on a cold, drizzly day in Birmingham, also he feels that most (and this is a generalisation) Aussies are quite positive, and have a bit more of 'get up and go' about them. I suppose what we are fed up of in Birmingham are the chavs (bogens?? equivalent Aussie term??), the negativity of some people, the fact that everyone is also worried about being politically correct all the time, and the overcrowding. So, would anyone say that the things my husband believes to be about Australia is correct? We are not naive people, we know that life is what you make it and there are ups and downs to every country you live. I too have thought that by moving the other side of the world I am perhaps giving my children a good future, but a future without their family, and that's what I find the hardest to deal with. My husband has set up a very good business here and is extremely good at what he does, so I know he would be determined to make it work overseas, but I do think we could be silly to give up what we have here. I am still no closer to making a decision but at least I have a good insight into things so thanks again for everyone's input.

 

Well if you don't like where you are in Birmingham you don't have to move very far to be living in a cute little village somewhere and find that community spirit. Living in a city in Australia (and you are more likely to be in a city suburb in Australia) does not mean that you will find a community spirit. I lived in one house in a Sydney suburb for five years and none of the neighbours ever spoke to us, or to each other as far as I can tell.

 

The weather. I moved back to the UK six months ago and maybe I have just been fortunate, but I have grown a real appreciation of the UK weather, it is far better than I remembered it. Winter was mild, rainfall a fraction of what I was used to in Sydney and I can walk and walk without getting exhausted or hot and sweaty and uncomfortable from the heat. You don't get drizzle in Australia that is true, but you get torrential downpours that can last the whole day and on a regular basis. Keeps you indoors far more than drizzle ever will. Having said that, I do think I just about prefer the overall warmer weather of Australia, not having to wear big coats and boots and even getting some warm days in winter probably tips the balance. But no way would I say UK weather is crap, it is a lot easier to deal with in some ways.

 

Chavs, bogans... you can get them anywhere. And some people have get up and go and others do not in either country. I think Australians on the whole might have a better sense of national pride than Brits, on the whole. You wont find many Aussies being negative and complaining about their own country in the way that some Brits will . However, you have to consider whether you are dwelling on negatives yourself...

 

Regarding overcrowding well Australia is a big country with a small population, most of the country is uninhabited. The populated areas, where you are most likely to end up, are just as crowded as any town or city in the UK. I am 40 minutes by train from London now, but live in a far less crowded area than I did in Sydney.

 

Anyway, I go back to my earlier post. If you want to go to Australia, just because you like it, then do so, but don't go half heartedly because you think you are doing your children a big favour and giving them a better life.

[VERYSTORMY]

Afraid i agree with the above. I think your husband has a slightly rose tinted view of Oz.

 

The suburbs are little different to any city in the UK. The people in them are no friendlier - in fact for us, we have had the opposite. We have just moved house, but have spent the last seven years in a house in a little gated community with a communal pool and BBQ area, so should be the ideal for community spirit. Yet, in seven years, i don't think we even spoke to most of the neighbors.

 

I would not say the education system is better. There are good and bad schools.

 

Weather is very subjective. But, dont think it is sunny all the time - We have winter. In fact Perth has a higher rainfall than the UK. I am away at work at the moment, but, i when i call my wife in half an hour, i know she will report it is cold, wet and grey. The summer comes. The first summer was great - felt nice to have the heat. That very quickly wears off and you come to dread the really hot days. Most of the Australians i know despise summer. Most prefer spring and autumn.

 

As for how this effects kids. In my experience, if your kids are outdoor type kids now, they will be outdoor type kids in Oz. If they are the type of kid that likes sitting in front of the X Box now, they will be the same in Oz. Oz kids are no different to the UK kids. Dont think they will be playing at the beach all day, because unless you have a LOT of money, the chances are you will be no where near the beach.

 

Then, I would factor in the economy. Here in WA, we officially entered recession a couple of weeks ago. Many of the other states are also seriously struggling. Oz is NOT a good place to be without a good income.

[wattsy1982]

Thank You all for commenting, I appreciate everyone's views. I used the words 'better life for the children' etc out of ease really, perhaps I should explain more. We live in Birmingham, not a bad part of Birmingham, but it's not where we imagined ourselves settling although we both grew up here. When we went travelling 9 years ago we went on a world trip, including travelling round Australia. We always said when we came back that if we were backpacking around Birmingham at the time, we'd have got the next bus straight out of there! Although it's improved a lot, we don't feel like Birmingham is the place for us, not enough going on, crap weather (like most of UK I suppose), theres not a lot of community feel etc. My husband thinks living in Australia will give the kids better prospects because its not as overpopulated as UK, the education system is supposed to be better, the weather, generally better- enabling us to spend more time outdoors and not stuck inside like what tends to happen on a cold, drizzly day in Birmingham, also he feels that most (and this is a generalisation) Aussies are quite positive, and have a bit more of 'get up and go' about them. I suppose what we are fed up of in Birmingham are the chavs (bogens?? equivalent Aussie term??), the negativity of some people, the fact that everyone is also worried about being politically correct all the time, and the overcrowding. So, would anyone say that the things my husband believes to be about Australia is correct? We are not naive people, we know that life is what you make it and there are ups and downs to every country you live. I too have thought that by moving the other side of the world I am perhaps giving my children a good future, but a future without their family, and that's what I find the hardest to deal with. My husband has set up a very good business here and is extremely good at what he does, so I know he would be determined to make it work overseas, but I do think we could be silly to give up what we have here. I am still no closer to making a decision but at least I have a good insight into things so thanks again for everyone's input.

 

It really just depends what you as an individual/family class as a 'good' life. Only you can really answer that

[starlight7]

A cold , wet day in Kenilworth was the day we decided to come to Australia so I can empathise with those who want to escape the dire Winters in the UK. You won't get that here, even in Melbourne where I live because the Winter cold is interspersed with brilliant sunny days with 15-20C warmth and lovely plants and flowers.For us that was a big draw card.

[dmjg]

Most Aussie residents

are quite positive, the majority of the negative ones seem to frequent PIO.

[bristolman]

A cold , wet day in Kenilworth was the day we decided to come to Australia so I can empathise with those who want to escape the dire Winters in the UK. You won't get that here, even in Melbourne where I live because the Winter cold is interspersed with brilliant sunny days with 15-20C warmth and lovely plants and flowers.For us that was a big draw card.

 

Many of us actually enjoy those lovely cold crisp winters days in the UK, it can be interspersed with horrible dreary days of course just like in Melbourne.

[Gbye grey sky]

Many of us actually enjoy those lovely cold crisp winters days in the UK, it can be interspersed with horrible dreary days of course just like in Melbourne.

 

Yes, I agree, if you enjoy the cold bright winter days interspersed with cold dreary days you are better off staying (or returning to) the UK for sure.

[bristolman]

Yes, I agree, if you enjoy the cold bright winter days interspersed with cold dreary days you are better off staying (or returning to) the UK for sure.

 

I wouldn't come back for that reason but I certainly don't hate the lovely crisp winters days. I actually find winters here very similar to Melbourne, maybe not as cold here lol

[Freckleface]

I wouldn't come back for that reason but I certainly don't hate the lovely crisp winters days. I actually find winters here very similar to Melbourne, maybe not as cold here lol

I suppose that might be true if you are comparing the winter temperature in the middle of the day in the UK to the winter temperature in the middle of the night in Melbourne. :biglaugh:

[bristolman]

[/b]

I suppose that might be true if you are comparing the winter temperature in the middle of the day in the UK to the winter temperature in the middle of the night in Melbourne. :biglaugh:

 

It was tongue in cheek

[starlight7]

The pavements are always so wet in the UK. It dries out here very quickly. Even in Summer it stays wet over there. Ghastly.

[bristolman]

The pavements are always so wet in the UK. It dries out here very quickly. Even in Summer it stays wet over there. Ghastly.

 

 

You really must try harder. :biglaugh:

[starlight7]

And the litter.. no self respect. We don't have litter like that, more pride in our towns and cities. Better morale altogether.

[bristolman]

And the litter.. no self respect. We don't have litter like that, more pride in our towns and cities. Better morale altogether.

 

Seriously, is that the best you have got lol

[bristolman]

And the litter.. no self respect. We don't have litter like that, more pride in our towns and cities. Better morale altogether.

 

Yep. http://platypusspot.org/blog/general-news/melbourne's-dirty-(and-lethal)-problem

[BacktoDemocracy]

Hi All, I am new to this forum so please go easy on me, ha ha!. I am looking for help in trying to make a decision on moving to Australia. Any positive, or truthful stories or advice on how you made the decision to move and if it has worked out for you, or if not- and why not.

Basically I am 34 and my husband is 37, we have 2 children aged 2 and 4. My husband is the one who first came up with the idea of moving (we travelled around Australia about 9 years ago)- he thinks it will be a better lifestyle for us as a family and give our children a better future. He is a self-employed plumber and I am a student studying Nutritional Therapy (and also stay at home mom). We have sought advice on the visa process and would be looking at the skilled visa route. We were urged to lodge the application sooner rather than later as obviously my husband is approaching 40. He wants to start the process now but I am hesitant. He also wants me to give a yes or no answer and I find I can't! I am about 60% in favour of moving if I am honest. My main worry is leaving my family behind and taking my children away from their grandparents, cousins etc. If I didn't have family around I would make the move tomorrow. After having broached the subject with my mom and sister, they were quite outspoken on how distraught they would be if we moved and I suppose I am feeling very guilty!

I just don't know how I can bring myself to make the decision but at the same time I don't want to regret not moving. Please help! :confused:

 

Firstly i will declare that we returned after 10 years but we are much older and we could not see how to downsize in oz and maintain a lifestyle, mainly because my wife was very senior, on a big salary but with no way of getting a smaller job at the same level , so our return was due to a set of circumstances that were ours.

But, and there is always a but, lots of people on here seem to have problems with family left behind so for close knit familes that seems to be a real issue.

And then jobs, work and access to it is much more regulated than in the uk and all tho uk quals will get you into oz to progress you often need oz quals and experience and that can be costly in time and money, and my experience is that often uk experience and seniority is not recognised in oz, you can be senior in the uk and go to oz and find you've slid down a snake to the bottom and that is something you have to consider very seriously at your ages.

And finally distance, oz is a long way from anywhere that is interesting or, and I'll stick my neck out here, any history.

Finally, finally, oz is still trying to find an identity, I think, and it makes it a country which is very jingoistically patriotic which makes it difficult for australians to hear criticism, also it is very tribal as a society, imagine it as a country full of football club supporters in many aspects of life.

Having laid those trips on you, obviously a significant number of people do go and make a success of it and love it but you need to be aware it is not England in the sun it's Australia, an independent and distinct country.

[Southchick]

This is really tricky and to be honest I don't think the decision gets easier even nearly two years in to the process! ( we waiting to hear any day now). We have travelled, lived and worked in Australia and even then I do have conversations with myself quite a lot regarding taking my son away from family. We have a three year old and my family adore him. Half our family are in England (mine) and my husbands are all in South Africa and although we miss them a lot we Skype every week and visit once a year for quality time, and we fly my mother in law over too to stay with us. We have always saved and spent any extra money on seeing family...I know it's more expensive flying with two children though so that will be more complicated. Being on the other side of the world is difficult, especially when you are worried about anyone. My mum had a health scare when we were in Australia and I didn't cope with that very well as I have always been the one that helps and organises if there's a family problem. But in my heart I honestly was happier in Australia. I made some great friends that welcomed us into their lives and became extended family. There will always be "debates" on here as to which country is better/ most promising future etc and it's all very subjective, EVERYONE had a different experience and opinion and I just believe you have to follow your gut instinct as all to often that will be right!

if it's telling you to stay then stay and make peace with it, the what ifs are natural but not at all helpful! The way I see it is you get one go at life, cheesy but so very true and something we all too aware of... You can spend years planning for your future and things can change so quickly that you wish you had taken life by the balls and just gone for it!! People will argue that this isn't a very responsible attitude, but you can always come back if it doesn't work out, yes it's money wasted and more change for your children but if they are loved and with you then I don't suppose they will care too much! You are lucky in that you both have great career prospects and there will always be work for you with the right outlook and attitude. I have travelled with my husbands job since our son was born and he is a very secure, confident and kind little soul. He loves being with his family but also has had such adventures and experiences that I cannot put a price on.

In Australia he camped with kaolas and kangaroos, learnt to fish, swam with dolphins out at sea, bbq'd in the outback, and was outside most days A Lot of the time in the fresh air and he was sooooo so happy, eating fresh fruit and vegetables. I'm not saying at all that children in the uk have less of an outdoor life but in our case only now has the weather started to be such that we hav wanted to get out in it! (Still abit too chilly to get in the sea or camp- we could but not just yet thanks!) and we live in Cornwall which is such a beautiful part of the uk. We have lots of friend a that have emigrated all over oz and in their opinions their children are Definately happier and they don't regret a thing, but again that is just their experience. There are positives and negatives and everyone's again will be different, we are going because I know if we don't we will always be thinking what if... My heart saying go for it and my brain saying we will work it out because we always do... All too often in my job I see people regretting what they didn't do and not often what they did. We have both just landed great jobs here but again we still going for it! Jobs are precious I know but you know what we still going for it!!! No one can make your decision but you but as you asked this is just out way of thinking!.. Goodness I could ramble on so much more but I'll spare you, but I do wish you the best of luck in your decision and know we have all Been there!! X

[The Fisheys]

Hi All, I am new to this forum so please go easy on me, ha ha!. I am looking for help in trying to make a decision on moving to Australia. Any positive, or truthful stories or advice on how you made the decision to move and if it has worked out for you, or if not- and why not.

Basically I am 34 and my husband is 37, we have 2 children aged 2 and 4. My husband is the one who first came up with the idea of moving (we travelled around Australia about 9 years ago)- he thinks it will be a better lifestyle for us as a family and give our children a better future. He is a self-employed plumber and I am a student studying Nutritional Therapy (and also stay at home mom). We have sought advice on the visa process and would be looking at the skilled visa route. We were urged to lodge the application sooner rather than later as obviously my husband is approaching 40. He wants to start the process now but I am hesitant. He also wants me to give a yes or no answer and I find I can't! I am about 60% in favour of moving if I am honest. My main worry is leaving my family behind and taking my children away from their grandparents, cousins etc. If I didn't have family around I would make the move tomorrow. After having broached the subject with my mom and sister, they were quite outspoken on how distraught they would be if we moved and I suppose I am feeling very guilty!

I just don't know how I can bring myself to make the decision but at the same time I don't want to regret not moving. Please help! :confused:

 

I must admit that I haven't read all the posts on this thread, after all, you are after personal experiences.

i would go for it, without hesitation.

When we came here, my Dad was 84, my Mum was 80. All three of us knew that the next time we would meet up would be at one of their funerals. It was difficult; but my parents are true parents, not selfish, and they completely accepted that the opportunities for me here by far exceeded those in the UK. As a parent yourself you would want your own children to be happy, I am sure you would not be as selfish as your own parents seem to have been. In any case you are quite young, surely your folks can jump on a Qantas flight here, and come for December and January, and see you all...........I just think it is emotional blackmail to try to hold you back.......if Australia is for you.

Now I totally "get" the bit about your OH and his qualifications. This lot are a nightmare, not only do they have a leaden bureaucracy, there isn't any desire to "cut red tape."

At the end of the day, the history of mankind is emigration for a better life for our children. The million dollar question you need to ask yourselves is simply this, "will your children ever forgive you for not taking the opportunity to come her?" And the answer is no.