ljinoz Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 I finally snapped. I've been subject to workplace bullying pretty much since I started and finally snapped and walked out today. I've had 2 members of staff take it upon themselves to gang up and bully me for a long time now. I came in today and sat down at my desk and ignored one of the staff members who has been bullying me. She then followed me to my desk and repeatedly got in my face saying "hello" "hello" "hello" and waving at me. I told her to leave me alone and that she has already put me through enough. This staff member likes to play the victim so she ran off crying after I said that. The other staff member who is actually supposed to be my superior then ran off after her and came back in and started yelling at me and swearing and being abusive towards me and I just lost it. I told her not to speak to me like that and she told me "she would speak to me however the f*ck she wanted" and I told her she has subject me to enough. She then yelled out "omg do you think I give a f*ck about all of that" and started screaming at me to get the f*ck out. I then threw something at the wall which I am very much embarrassed about and I know its unacceptable but I just felt like I had to do something in the moment. Now I am the one at home feeling like I never want to get out of bed and she is safe and happy at work. I have never in my life been spoken to like that by somebody, never mind at work, and it was like she had been waiting for a reason to unload on me. I have never done anything to her, I have taken her looking me up and down, swearing at me, throwing things at me, telling me my work is wrong when its right, giving me an unreasonable workload ... the list goes on and on for over 2 years and this is how it ends with me looking like the bad person because I reacted and nothing I can do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul1Perth Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Can't say I can blame you, I would have had them by the shirt collar the first time they spoke to me like that. If they have said those type of things to you it sounds like you have a good case in a tribunal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ozmaniac Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 You've posted this in Migration Issues - are you on a 457 or some other visa that ties you to your employer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 I feel for you! Workplace bullying is endemic unfortunately (and in my experience more often instigated by women than men!). I kicked a couch once (fortunately the bullies were on the end of the phone otherwise I might have kicked them!) but ended up with a broken toe so didn't do that again! I eventually "retired" from the toxic cesspit! I am am sorry this has happened to you - do you get a chance for a termination interview with HR so you can point out the deficits in managing bullies in the workplace? I hope you can find something else which will restore your faith in your self! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Did you report the bullying at any time higher up the chain or to HR. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Time to lawyer up ? These people shouldn't be allowed to get away with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chortlepuss Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Sorry to hear your situation. Suggest you raise with HR immediately, contact fair work and put in a complaint. Never bullied before Oz, I became a victim at a not for profit organisation - completely corrupt! Can happen to anyone, however experienced and tough. I really sympathise but it is time for you to go on the offensive and complain. If only to prove to yourself you did your best to defend yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljinoz Posted December 16, 2014 Author Share Posted December 16, 2014 I'm on a 187 visa but have spoken to immigration and am going to leave it to them to investigate. Yes I had been complaining for some time about conditions and because my boss did nothing I took the decision to leave. I did not feel like he backed me up when I was having problems and the lady who swore at me actually seemed to play on it and take sides which worsened the conflict. My health was also suffering and I was not coping. I have actually secured a new job and was in the process of working my notice. I am now concerned that the woman who swore at me is going to contact my new employer as I live in a small place and she is vindictive enough. I would like to complain to fair work as feel like there should be consequences but I have already been warned against it as it might provoke them into contacting my new employer. Can this even happen? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve99 Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Is there any form of racism going on here? I and my other half have been subjected to this on numerous occasions over the years. I had on situation where a manager was bailing me up every day and demanding why I thought anything back in the old country was as good and even worse, better than in Australia(without me ever mentioning my thoughts on these issues), the other employees thought this was justified as it made them look better. I also had to walk out of that job but had no redress at all as this was around 15 years ago with far less background support than you can get today. These incumbent workers/managers often create their own fiefdoms within which they think they can do what they like. Pursue this to the limit, they deserve everything you can throw at them (legally that is).. Good luck and you have my 10000% sympathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parley Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Can be hard to prove though can't it ? Unless you have witnesses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
betterskierthanthewife Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Do you have any work emails that show them bullying you? Verbal confrontations, I'm afraid can get easily twisted especially as there are two of them and one of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljinoz Posted December 16, 2014 Author Share Posted December 16, 2014 Unfortunately I only have the one email of her apologising for being a bitch. No witnesses either, its a 4 person office so it is my boss and the 2 bullies. I think there is an element of xenophobia as I have been subject to degrading comments from both of them about overseas workers. I'm not really sure what the issues with me have been, I always thought I was a non-offensive person. I'm quiet, get on with my work, and am quite an open friendly person. I'm worried about proving things because its 2 people against 1 and other than a diary I've been keeping and Doctor's appointments I have no proof. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parley Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Probably best/easiest just to quit and walk away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diane Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 Definitely speak to someone at Fairwork or somewhere like that about the issue. The diary may be good backup as well. Hopefully your new employers will see any approaches by your ex employers as sour grapes. If you haven't already done so, visit your doctor as well, both to get some help with your health problems and to talk to someone. Your health and your happiness are the most important things in this whole situation, don't let these small minded pathetic people make you doubt your own worth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacaranda Posted December 16, 2014 Share Posted December 16, 2014 I once worked with a bully.Not a pleasant experience at all.I would'nt worry about your ex boss contacting your new job. Infact if your new boss says anything about it,I would be honest and tell him/her you left the job because of bullying! Nasty morons!I really dislike people like that.But you know what hon,it says more about them than you and you're obviously the better person. Start your new job with your head held high,and I truly hope your next employers are nice,friendly mature people! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljinoz Posted December 17, 2014 Author Share Posted December 17, 2014 Thanks, I really do want to complain to Fair Work but have been suggested it might provoke my old employer into doing something. Because I threw the hole punch I did do something wrong and I'm so annoyed that I didn't just walk out and/or tell my boss I wasn't going in for the rest of the week because I didn't feel well. I feel like my reaction is now the only thing being investigated and the fact I've been subject to over 2 years of workplace bullying and had just entered the office and already had both of them jump on me is being ignored. This job would have given me a really good reference too for future jobs and I can't even use them now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scrutineer Posted December 17, 2014 Share Posted December 17, 2014 Threaten them with constructive dismissal. It's not legal for them to hound you out of employment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacaranda Posted December 17, 2014 Share Posted December 17, 2014 Hon,please don't over worry this ok?As I said if it comes to that,you will just have to be honest.You don't have to go into all the ins and outs of what happened.Don't focus on whats happened.Just either focus on the present time or look toward the future and how happy you will be.xxx:cute: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljinoz Posted December 18, 2014 Author Share Posted December 18, 2014 Thanks Melza, I'm in a better place today and have decided to draw a line under it all and look forward as best I can and try and stop blaming myself. I feel incredibly let down by my boss that he has allowed this to happen but I'm sure it happens in lots of companies and in the future I need to make sure I stand up for myself and get out as soon as I see signs of anything similar. Unfortunately because of my visa I had to stay put for so long and there is still a chance it may be cancelled but I will let the visa cancellations unit investigate and make a decision. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parley Posted December 18, 2014 Share Posted December 18, 2014 I've never been a fan of the 'finally snapped' or ' I just snapped' defence though. I've heard it used too many times in court by people who murdered someone so I wouldn't use that officially if I were you. As I said earlier I would probably just leave if it were me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul1Perth Posted December 18, 2014 Share Posted December 18, 2014 Thanks Melza, I'm in a better place today and have decided to draw a line under it all and look forward as best I can and try and stop blaming myself. I feel incredibly let down by my boss that he has allowed this to happen but I'm sure it happens in lots of companies and in the future I need to make sure I stand up for myself and get out as soon as I see signs of anything similar. Unfortunately because of my visa I had to stay put for so long and there is still a chance it may be cancelled but I will let the visa cancellations unit investigate and make a decision. Glad you are feeling a bit better ljinoz. Good decision to just let it slide and move on. I've worked in a lot of places and may have been lucky but I've not seen bullying like you experienced anywhere. Some of the stories my wife comes home with from the hospital aren't too flash, the worst time she had was when she was made Ward Sister as a 25 year old and all the people she thought were her friends suddenly turned against her when she had to do the rosters for Christmas and New Year. TBH I think it's a female thing, guys would stand up for themselves and the bullying would stop or something physical would happen, that's the way men sort stuff out eventually. Good luck with the next job, I'm sure something will turn up with some nice people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ljinoz Posted December 18, 2014 Author Share Posted December 18, 2014 I didn't mean for it to come across that I was excusing my actions and using the bullying as a defence - I am ashamed I reacted at all and wish I'd just walked out and it really is out of character for me. I've been replaying all of the different possible outcomes in my head however 2 years of being screamed at, criticised for things I haven't done, etc has really worn me down and to be sworn at, have rude comments directed at me and screamed at within 10 minutes of entering the office first thing in the morning caused me to lose it and I wasn't thinking rationally at all. I was tired and it was already taking all of my strength to go in work. I had already made the decision to leave about a month ago and have secured a new job and was in the process of working my notice which makes it even harder to deal with because I was about to get out of there with a good reference etc. Thanks Paul - I'm lucky that I've never come across bullying in the workplace before this. Hopefully I won't ever again but I agree it is probably more of a female thing and lots of girls I know have experienced similar things. For whatever reason I had 2 female employees (one above me one below me) both go after me and a boss who turned a blind eye to it. I think the visa made me feel in a weak position and where I usually would have stood up for myself I was scared about losing my job and having already suffered through some of the bullying didn't want it to be for nothing. I've obviously learnt the hard way that its better to speak up in case things do come to a head like they have done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacaranda Posted December 18, 2014 Share Posted December 18, 2014 We all have our breaking point.I've been in a similar situation.You feel like walking out,but bills have to be paid.If you apply for other jobs,sometimes future employers don't want to wait around for you to work your notice,so sometimes you have no choice or little choice.Fwiw hon,its better that you threw something than walloped one of them! ! Good luck with your new job.I hope it all works out for you.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kapri Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 It sounds like you've had an awful experience. Toxic workplaces are soul destroying. i agree with Parley. For the sake of your health and dignity, just walk away. You have a new job thankfully! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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