Dawny Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Wishing you all the very best with your future plans, You need to be where you are happy :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerry Pollard Posted December 30, 2012 Author Share Posted December 30, 2012 We came over to Melbourne in Nov 1999. I hated it and missed myfamily and friends. My husband settled a LOT quicker. We decided to move home again after two years. ALL the reasons we'd wanted to move were still there. Everyone doing exactly the same. House prices had gone sky high. We tried to re-settle in UK and stuck it four months then came back to Melbourne and bought our own place. Its taken time but our kids have flourished and our careers took off. Its a big thing emigrating. Took me four years to feel at home. I still miss UK but see it as my equal homeland with Oz and that will never change. Think really hard WHY you did it in the first place. Pack up your things but leave them here in a container at the port. Go back. Re-assess. IF you want to stay, THEN ship your stuff. IF like us you go back and change your mind, you'll have saved $1000s by not shipping and your things will still be in Oz. good luck! We came for an adventure and it was a dream, more my hubby's than mine but thought why not, what do we have to lose. i didn't think I'd feel like this, not sure what I expected to feel like to be honest. i think I was so taken over with everything, the planning, the organising, I didn't fully understand how it would affect me leaving my family, our visa was only for 4 yrs. anyway and we kept our house on in the UK, so I think I always knew it wouldn't be forever. Australia is a lovely place but its not my home and as more days go by I realise more and more, the UK will always be my home, its just taken one hell of a journey to realise where my heart lies. And also for my son, he's only 3 so hopefully this will all be a distant memory when he grows up but he has no relationships with any of his family what so ever, he speaks to nobody on Skype and FaceTime and I want him to know his family, these are the things I didn't really think through. in one way I am glad we came cause its made me realise I am a home bird. ( its what my brother calls me) . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris OHare Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Hi Kerry, We feel the same and have only been here 4 months (SA), we have been thinking of returning in March, its so difficult making the decision, dont know what to do from one day to the next, in a way I wish I'd never come to Australia... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fizzybangs Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Some people just aren't cut out to live away family and need the security of familiarity around them, good luck with your move back. Baz, why are you looking at this section of PIO? Every time someone posts about going back to UK you have the same old stock answer about that person missing family - is that your problem? Do you miss your family and are you unable to go back or don't you have a family to go back to? You have been so very wrong on occasions about people missing family so you might need to wish people well instead! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jersey Beans Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Hey if you're not happy there's no point in trying to force it. Better to regret doing something than not doing it. If it made you appreciate what you had at home then your trip down under has not been wasted. good luck with the move back :smile: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerry Pollard Posted December 30, 2012 Author Share Posted December 30, 2012 Hi Kerry, We feel the same and have only been here 4 months (SA), we have been thinking of returning in March, its so difficult making the decision, dont know what to do from one day to the next, in a way I wish I'd never come to Australia... Awww, we've been here 7 months and my feelings haven't changed, if anything their getting worse but we have a 12 month lease to finish which finishes in September but I've already joined some uk job sites so hopefully I can go back earlier to find a job and get Charlie settled in nursery, I don't feel like I'm the same person I was back home, I'm miserable, unhappy. I'm sick to death of BBQs and the beach and I keep having to hide in doors when it gets too hot, how people can say they have a better outdoor lifestyle here is beyond me. In away I'm glad we came as I now know where my heart belongs but I too wish we hadn't come. I hope your move goes well. I can't wait to book our tickets. X Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perthbum Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Some people just aren't cut out to live away family and need the security of familiarity around them, good luck with your move back. It's not though, family has a pull I am sure, it s so much more about wanting to return than that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris OHare Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 I understand with that...I'm not missing family at all to be honest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris OHare Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Kerry Where are you living at the moment? I see you lived in Manchester, we lived near Blackpool... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freckleface Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Awww, we've been here 7 months and my feelings haven't changed, if anything their getting worse but we have a 12 month lease to finish which finishes in September but I've already joined some uk job sites so hopefully I can go back earlier to find a job and get Charlie settled in nursery, I don't feel like I'm the same person I was back home, I'm miserable, unhappy. I'm sick to death of BBQs and the beach and I keep having to hide in doors when it gets too hot, how people can say they have a better outdoor lifestyle here is beyond me. In away I'm glad we came as I now know where my heart belongs but I too wish we hadn't come. I hope your move goes well. I can't wait to book our tickets. X Hi Kerry - you should be able to break your lease and go more or less straight away if you want to. There should be a clause in your lease that outlines the costs (which are usually minimal). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris OHare Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Hi Kerry - you should be able to break your lease and go more or less straight away if you want to. There should be a clause in your lease that outlines the costs (which are usually minimal). Yes but you would still have to pay your rent until they find someone, you are also liable for the marketing costs and possibly any admin fees that the landlord would be charged by the agent, like a finders fee.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freckleface Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Yes but you would still have to pay your rent until they find someone, you are also liable for the marketing costs and possibly any admin fees that the landlord would be charged by the agent, like a finders fee.. Yes but those costs aren't a lot and would allow them to leave more or less straight away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fourcorners Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Loads of people break lease here. If the rental market is strong the agent will usually be able to find a new tenant very quickly. A friend here has broken her lease and although they found someone to take the lease on, the agents still opened the house up to all comers and there was a fight for it. In all she paid for 1 months rent whilst all the paperwork was being sorted out. I would let a residential lease stop you from moving and getting on with your lives. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerry Pollard Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Kerry Where are you living at the moment? I see you lived in Manchester, we lived near Blackpool... Hi Chris OHare we're in Carrum, its an hours drive from Melbourne airport, we use to live in Stockport, how I miss it and I know I'm probably one of the only ones but I love Blackpool, I know it gets some bad press but I still loved going, eating doughnuts and hotdogs and having proper fish and chips on the beach, walking on the piers, getting on rides, we've had some top days their. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerry Pollard Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 I would love to break our lease and just go but we need to save as much as we can and we have guests coming in January and march, so at least we'll be busy till then. My hubby would probably stay, he only really misses his 10yr old daughter and doesn't understand how I'm feeling, I know I'm probably being selfish but I feel like I'm going out of my mind. I'm trying to get him to see sense in me going home sooner so I can get a job and save and so can he here, he could probably save a lot more if me and our son weren't here, so we'll see what happens, thank you all for your posts. X Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dufont Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 When we first came, we didn't settle and decided to make the move back. Taking the pressure off to settle, in the end made us settle if that makes sense....and by the time we were looking at flights and cancelling the lease on the house we decided that actually, we didn't want to go back. We moved house to a different area and everything fell into place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerry Pollard Posted January 1, 2013 Author Share Posted January 1, 2013 When we first came, we didn't settle and decided to make the move back. Taking the pressure off to settle, in the end made us settle if that makes sense....and by the time we were looking at flights and cancelling the lease on the house we decided that actually, we didn't want to go back. We moved house to a different area and everything fell into place. Awww, I'm glad it worked for you, my hubby would stay as he likes it here but I just can't seem to settle, I feel like I've left myself back home and the person that's here isn't me at all. Coming here has opened my eyes and has made me realise my family is everything to me and i miss The UK so much. Xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest74886 Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 I'm the same! Done alot of travelling, spent many holidays/ whv in Oz! But moving here is very different. We are a year in, and thinking the same about going back. The positives don't out weight the negatives in Oz at the mo. I'm planning on going home early/mid next year to test the waters and try and make a decision..stay or go home!? Good luck on your return. Hi I really sympathise, from what I've picked up from your other posts you are finding Australia's way of doing things in the social welfare world a bit trying and I doubt whether they can catch up on Europe with their present attitudes, so I'm not surprised that you are considering going back. I suppose the bottom line is whether you can get a proper job back home, but I suppose that has to be balanced against long term career development which I expect you feel you'll never get here. Lots of luck; we are hopefully on the home stretch now, final renovations to the investment property and just sell it hopefully and then off to France in Sept for some R&R Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wellers and Whitehead Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 HiI really sympathise, from what I've picked up from your other posts you are finding Australia's way of doing things in the social welfare world a bit trying and I doubt whether they can catch up on Europe with their present attitudes, so I'm not surprised that you are considering going back. I suppose the bottom line is whether you can get a proper job back home, but I suppose that has to be balanced against long term career development which I expect you feel you'll never get here. Lots of luck; we are hopefully on the home stretch now, final renovations to the investment property and just sell it hopefully and then off to France in Sept for some R&R My previous boss has said he would employ me again. The main problem is I can't drive due to medical reasons and 95% of social work jobs want drivers. Spoke to my friend, a senior social worker in London andshe doesn't drive, they give employees oyster cards to get around. I'm not learning anything here, as people in higher positions than myself have less experience. If I didn't have to work, it would be so much better, I wouldn't be so aware of how bad such services are and wouldn't have to deal with it, however i'm no lottery winner yet. Had a lovely day at the beach today, and had out year anniversary of living in Oz yesterday, but the work thing is a problem. Booking a flight home for March, to see family/friends, but also to give me time to reflect on what I want. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digitalis Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 Funnily enough I've been here 8 months too and am am about 90% sure I want to go back. I came here on a WHV but can stay on a 457 if I wanted. The following are a list of things which are definitely worse in Australia, most of which I had no idea of before I came here. The driving and roads here are appalling, I dread getting into my car. Lights and light jumpers everywhere. You can be driving on a deserted stretch of road at 4am and still hit 3 red lights. For a nation of supposed fitness lovers, Aussies are loathe to not use the car. Prices are a rip off, even taking into account the proliferation of jobs apart from Fuel, which is cheaper. Alcohol a complete con. If you are a drinker in Oz you will never have money. Shops open and close to suit the staff and choice is crap. My gym closed early (1pm) TEN days running over Xmas and NYE. Am looking forward to leaving them hanging for their direct debit when I go back in May. Customer service can be dreadful. Left an item on a Perth transport bus and when I rang in to enquire the "service" I received was a sick joke. Aussies are tossers when drunk, men and women and would get separated from their senses in the UK very quickly. Very much a Harry Enfield "Loadsa Money" attitude here, and I have encountered more snobbery and general dick swinging here than I ever did in Wales. Aussies not that keen on Brits generally, or at least nowhere near the "distant cousins" myth put out in the UK. TV is atrocious. Will never slag the BBC off again. Just endless repeats of American sitcoms and infomericals. Aussie men very aggressive approaching women, Aussie clubs and pubs in Perth at least are more often than not complete sausage fests. It is this last point in fact that has been the biggest shock to me. Aussie women are generally better looking than British women but there are soooo many men here! NT was even worse. Apparently the East is better but I have met some who said it's the same. Blokes seem to outnumber women 2:1 on a night out and a club can very quickly become almost full of fellas. At the end of the day the above is just the Aussie (WA?) culture, or a tiny slice therof, and I am not used to it nor do I want to get used to it. I have a few ties back in the UK that haven't been as easy to cut off as I thought as well which I assume is a common theme. I have a relative in SA who has been here slightly longer than me who loves it, and although she has just become pregnant is still not tempted back. I miss my mates and green countryside and occasional cold days too much lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest chris955 Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 I agree with everything except the women, seeing as the general make up of people in both countries is pretty much the same they cant possibly be better or worse looking in one country or the other. I cant say I have noticed any difference to be fair. They wear less clothing though :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digitalis Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 I agree with everything except the women, seeing as the general make up of people in both countries is pretty much the same they cant possibly be better or worse looking in one country or the other. I cant say I have noticed any difference to be fair. They wear less clothing though :-) Haha yeah fair one :wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SouthSaxon Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 8 months is not long enough. Take off the rose coloured specs, take advantage of the opportunities. DONT FOLLOW YOUR HEART (at least not in the first 2 years). Join in. Read a lot about where you live. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinsmom65 Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 8 months is not long enough. Take off the rose coloured specs, take advantage of the opportunities. DONT FOLLOW YOUR HEART (at least not in the first 2 years). Join in. Read a lot about where you live. Why should someone have to wait this magical two year mark. At the end of the day, it is the OP's decision. You say don't follow your heart, but if you can't settle and are not happy, why should you stay longer and make yourself more miserable. Australia is no magical land, at the end of the day, it is just another first world country. Cheers Karen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flathead Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 Take off the rose coloured specs. They obviously have done....and seen the place for what it really is Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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