ramot

Scarletteteve, although I do sympathise with your daughter being so unhappy in Australia, it is still early days for her and the rest of the family to adjust to their new country. I have moved from pillar to post all my life. Daughter of an army family, 4 years in Germany as a child and then 5 primary schools before the age of 10. Yes probably unhappy at times, but that was life. Met and married someone in the forces and moved + 3 children many times, the children changing schools and places, having to adjust and make new friends all the time. Then moved to Asia when the youngest was only 13 and had to be left in boarding school for the first time, travelling on her own to join us for her school holidays in a very strange and new environment, so I really do understand about unhappy 13 year olds. Fast forward many years, she has friends from all over the world because of the new experiences she had to cope with, and actually feels slightly sorry for the friends she left behind in our old village, who she feels missed out in the nicest sense. Not that they are unhappy, but definitely less wordly and a bit narrower in their outlook. It might get easier for her if and when she gets hopefully more involved in something she enjoys and makes more friends. My daughter had to realise that we were moving around because of her father's job, so basically there was little choice for her. Please don't move back to UK immediately just for your daughter unless there is no other choice. Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best, it won't be an easy decision.

I've been a member for quite some time and have had some really good help and advice, but I have also noticed a real change over the last few months. There seem to be some posters who have a real problem communicating in a civilised manner and constantly hijack lots of threads and turn them into Australia against UK, or post deliberately controversial threads. I wish they would just PM each other and keep off the main forums. As a result I hardly ever post any more. I'm fed up with people who have returned to UK constantly justifying their return and expressing their bitterness about their time in Australia, or others in Australia implying it's the best place in the world. Nowhere suits everyone, just be happy where ever you choose to live. I've lived in 5 countries so far and nowhere is perfect.

Great to read a positive post and so far not too many of the "knock every happy Australia thread" brigade posted yet! Sorry but I do get so fed up with the constant bickering on some posts, if you are happy in Australia great, if you prefer UK great, but both have good and bad points. You have a great positive attitude Lisa so hope you continue to live life to the full.

No as others have said you don't need your passport, but you should have proof of your identity with you when you fly in case it is asked for. eg drivers licence with photo. My daughter doesn't drive so does always have her passport with her. I know proof isn't often asked for when travelling internally in Australia, but we have had to show it more than once. Enjoy your trip.

Can't really help with your questions, but wanted to say high to someone from Nottingham. We used to live in Keyworth, and have to disagree with Oz to France about it being a young persons country. We retired here and have a great life, so it can suit young and old. Good luck to wherever you end up.

Yes we have!! First because of work we left our three in UK, aged 13,19,21. The youngest newly into boarding school, next one still at university and oldest just finished uni. I'm not saying it wasn't hard, but we all survived, Asia became home for the 2 younger ones, as they still had good long holidays, and we all had some amazing times together, so on balance the good outweighed the bad. Sometimes only just! Until you become an expat, you don't realise how many families live like this. Then on retirement we decided to come and live in Australia, all three children were still in UK, but this was something we had always wanted to do, and I suppose we wanted to live our lives and not through the children. Had we moved back where would we live? Our old village, at least 2 hours away from each child? none of them lived anywhere near the other, near the married one, even though we didn't know anyone? who knows? he could have had a new job offer and moved shortly after we arrived, it had happened to friends of ours. Been in Australia now 9 years, middle child joined us here nearly 7 years ago and youngest has now been here for nearly a year. Married one + grandchildren still in UK. Some people cope with distance from family, some don't, but we looked on retirement as an adventure to do what we wanted to do, we're lucky that we can go back to UK most years for at least 2 months, so we see the UK family. Ref. the idea of living 6 months in each country, I lived between UK and Brunei for 9 years, it isn't easy, you somehow never quite belong in either, I know people who have tried to do this and always feel they are constantly having to re-establish their lives every 6 months. Whatever you decide in the future all the best, there's probably no easy answer, but if you still have the need to go back to UK, then go for a really long visit, so after the initial excitement wears off you see the reality of life there. We joke that we keep moving further away from our children, but they keep finding us!!!!

I sympathise. When I joined my husband in Brunei, he had to go away for work only a few days after I arrived. I only knew the road to the airport, there were no street maps, and I felt pretty lost. I didn't know anyone, was in a house with no immediate neighbours and with jungle on the opposite side of the road. To be honest everything felt pretty hostile to me, not least the fact that the male workers who were working rear the house wore what I thought were balaclavas!!! In fact it was to protect them from the sun! Like you I found sleeping at night almost impossible, the monkeys on the roof didn't exactly help. So all I can say is you either learn to cope or face the alternative. I lived there for 9 years, learnt to put my fears behind me, made friends, coped with him sometimes only in the country for 6 days a month, and ended up loving living there. So good luck, give it time, everything is very strange for you at the moment, nothing is familiar, and I hope you manage to get used to it.

Sadly probably not. Not because we are unhappy here, we love it. but we came on the old 410 retirement visa which has been replaced by the incredibly expensive 405 investor retirement visa. Our visa was affordable, but there is no way we would want to tie so much money up with the state government, we want to spend it how we want to. All three of our children were in UK when we retired here after being expats for years, so I think we buck the trend of wanting to be with our children and grandchildren. This was our time of life, to do what we wanted to do. 2 of ours are now here, and we go back to UK every year to spend time with son and grandchildren. We don't intend to return to UK, but we never say never.

I totally agree, but on the whole it's only a few posters who seem to regularly hijack posts. Who knows what their agenda is!!??? Almost everyone else who has replied to this thread has tried to be helpful. We go back to the UK every year for usually 3 months as our grandchildren are there, and as I have mentioned before, the hardest thing we find is getting accommodation for that length of time. Short term lets tend to be expensive. We got a forecast of what my state pension would be (my husband had always paid his) and topped up my contribution by a couple of thousand pounds to get it increased, not to the top amount, but an improvement on the original forecast, as long as I lived to over 62!!!!! Glad to say I am in credit now. Personally I have no problem with anywhere that anyone chooses to live, I just can't understand the constant them against us, from either side. I've lived in 5 different countries, and there was good and bad in all of them, and I've never felt the need to justify any move. Anyone who wants to go back to UK, go, if anyone wants to stay In Oz, stay, but please just stop going on about the need to justify it.

I've just read every post on this thread and I can't find any reference to 'there are no jobs in the UK' almost all the posters have tried to help in a positive way, and not pushed that their lives are perfect in Oz. There are problems in most countries at the moment, nowhere is perfect, and every one has to make their own decisions of where to live for their own reasons, and it's not for the rest of us to judge or comment on their decisions. There's nothing wrong with Australia or UK if that's where you are happy and want to live.

We go back regularly and one of the things we have found hard is that nearly all the rentals are for a minimum of 6 months, so you have to be fairly sure that you want to stay in an area before committing. If you choose a holiday area you might be ok for shorter rentals. Also rules appear to be tightening up on registering with a GP as a national health patient. It seems that you possibly have to be back in UK for 1 year now, but you definitely have to prove that you are there to stay and not just visiting, it's not automatic, but there are reciprocal agreements between OZ and UK if you are on holiday, so hopefully you will be covered? Also have you kept your national insurance payments up while you have been in Australia? Your entitlement to a state pension and the amount you might get is dependent on your contributions over the years. Sorry to say this but if you have been away from UK for over 20 years, are you actually entitled to any state entitlements? Probably been suggested by others, but if you haven't been back to UK for a while, if you can afford it go for a holiday to see if it's really what you want. Good luck

Depending on your definition of racism, my daughter is working in Sydney and is constantly mocked by her manager for her English accent. When my daughter said every one has an accent she was told "I am Australian this is my country so I don't have an accent"!!!!! Obviously not as bad a case as mentioned by JJinky, but is still creates an unpleasant work situation.

I am replying to your original post just in case it has lost it's way with some of the replies. To be honest you haven't been here really very long. I have lived in 5 countries including a muslim one for 9 years prior to coming here, and moved over 17 times, so do have an idea of how you displaced perhaps you feel, although I have never been homesick as I have always managed to take the rough with the smooth, and treat my time in each country as an experience not to be missed, definitely in hindsight anyway! My children had a fairly disrupted education, including moving our daughter for year 5 for her GCES. She managed 8 and went onto Uni, so although mine never went to school here you don't have to be full time in the UK system to succeed. If you are suffering from depression then please seek help, to go back to the UK on your own in possibly straightened circumstances might make things better but very possibly worse. I have spent a lot of time apart from my husband due to his work, and for a while tried living between UK and overseas. Trust me it puts a tremendous strain on your marriage, we had to work very hard at staying together,and statistically more people we know split up than stayed together. Not intending to be too negative, but trying to point out a few realities of a long distance marriage. Can I please ask you to wake up and smell the roses, you have a husband and children. Treat yourselves to a nice trip away or something. Have just heard that my brother in law died on monday, and heard today that a friend's son, the same age as my son has been diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumour. It focuses the mind on the important things in life. If you are determined to go back to UK, then try to experience some of the good things here in Australia before you go, so you have some happy memories to take away with you. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Not sure if you have flown yet? Out of interest my daughter is epileptic and has successfully flown for over 10 years long haul on her own since the age of 13. Not sure about taking valium, you should check with your Dr. if on other medication. Make sure you have plenty of water with you to take your medication at the correct UK time, you can adjust when you arrive, it's easier that way. If you aren't allowed to take water with you depending on the airline, then take an empty bottle and get it filled up on board, don't be afraid to ask. A) To keep hydrated B) To take your meds at the right time. I mention the last because by our experience Emirates crews are especially good at ignoring call signs, have tested this on many occasions, the worst was over 40 mins for my daughter when was needing water to take her meds!!! She told them what she thought and carried water always after that. Wear comfortable loose clothes, so if you get too hot if you are nervous, you can take off a layer and cool down. Wear shoes that are comfortable and can be loosened. If you enjoy reading take a good book with you, it passes the time very well. If you are really worried you can alert the airline. All the other advice you have been given is excellent. So: Sit back and enjoy the flight!!!! Wish you all the best for your new life.

Yes it's a long flight, but they aren't old! Having been expats we have seen parents flying out in their 80's for holidays. Obviously health is relevant, but if you are fit then what's the problem except feeling nervous if you aren't used to long haul. There is no rule that says you can't break the journey each way when you travel. Even a 1 night break each way doesn't necessarily make it much more expensive, and definitely lessons the impact of a long flight. Do hope they get over the feeling of hurt for everyones sake, including their own. It can be an exciting time of their lives visiting another country, and the suggestion of a house swap is excellent. I am 68, retired to Oz 9 years ago with my husband, as we weren't ready to move back to UK after living in Asia. We fly back to UK for 2/3 months every year as we have 2 grandchildren and a son there. It's not a problem. We skype regularly, and actually see more of our grandchildren than our children ever saw of their grandparents when we lived in UK, as it was probably only a few weekends a year that we visited each other. My son is very very good at sending photos and we do the same, with photos of the grandparents adventures and holidays. We both went for a flight in a chipmunk last week as it was 50 years since my husband had his first solo flight in one. We so enjoy life in Australia, so perhaps your parents might find a new lease of life. All the best, hope you all start to feel better about the move, don't give up on your dream.

Wish you both well with whatever decisions you make. Life is for living, and being where you are happy, and having no regrets.

Just remember family friends and fish go off after 3 days!!!! Seriously we never stay with our son when we visit UK, we like our own space, and more importantly don't want to want to impose on their lives, and it's so easy to outstay your welcome. Having had visitors stay with us both as ex pats and loads when we first came to live here, short visits are fine, and ground rules need to be stated, saves a lot of heartache in the long run. Love having visitors and love it when they leave.

Well apart from the the PR bit for Oz, which is relevant, why are you so against moving when you are 50 etc!!!? We moved to Asia for work when we were 50'sh and stayed for 9 years, then retired to Oz at 60 with no family here, just for the experience and adventure. Been here for 9 years and love it, but who knows if we will up sticks again even at our great age!!!!

To the original poster I wish you luck with whatever decision you make. This may sound a little harsh, but I do question why some people emigrate when they are so close to their families, and so many who post here can't seem to cope with the separation and distance from them. Perhaps I'm more independent, but I married someone in the forces, moved at least every 2 years, had 3 children in 3 different places, and coped without any family support except for the important one for me, my husband. I think my mother must have made a quick visit at some stage after the births, but it would only have been for a couple of days as she worked full time, and we were in UK then. I just don't get this must be near my mother thing. Sorry this isn't intended to upset any one, but I do think some prospective immigrants should perhaps give it all a bit more thought, than this romantic idea of UK in the sun, and realise that it's a long expensive flight away, and exactly why they want to emigrate and who and what they are leaving behind. If you come to Australia and it isn't for you, then decide how long you want to stay for, get something out of the whole experience if you can, and don't have any regrets if you go back to the UK.

Check that it's safe to fly with your foot/ankle in plaster, as your feet/ankles swell a lot especially on a long flight, and could cause a big problem encased in plaster. Get assistance rather than walking the miles at the airport. I know that may sound unnecessary, but I was still limping quite badly for a few weeks recently 6 weeks after breaking a bone in my foot and again even if you are out of plaster, your foot will probably still be swollen from the injury, so it makes sense to be careful. Good luck.

Yes of course it's a spectacle, and yes probably a waste of money, but it was spectacular, and how would we all have felt if it had been a low budget disaster!!? Fingers crossed the UK doesn't end up out of pocket from the expense, and lets hope there is a chance that it will boost the economy, and lift morale, but then I am a glass half full person.

Funnily enough wow is the word I would use as well. Feel quite proud and am wearing red white and blue today, even though I haven't lived in UK for 18 years. Loved the James Bond spoof with the Queen, what a trouper she is, and loved the lighting of the cauldron by the hopefully future Olympians, inspired.

My daughter arranged an account with NAB before she left on a WHV and activated it when she arrived here. Hope that helps.

Loving reading about your travels. We visited most of the places you have been to a few years ago, so your photos have reminded me of our holiday, especially the helicopter ride over Franz Joseph glacier.

It's just an excuse for a get together so what is wrong with that!!! Most Australians I know do the whole sea food feast at christmas, so again what is wrong to have a lovely hot roast turkey during the coldest months. Yes we all know it's not really christmas, but we all have a laugh. Would the politically correct spoil sports on the forum prefer it to be called "Winter Festival"!!!!!!! I'll raise a glass or two, to all you miseries, on sunday while we are eating turkey with all the trimmings. Life's too short to fret the small stuff.