MBTTUK first generation aussie out of love with australia

[Guest]

14 minutes ago, torn said:

Yes I feel like it's a now or never situation as my 8 year old will soon become too old to move I think. I like Brisbane but it's too humid and hot for me and Perth is just too far away from anything (sorry to those who live in and love Perth :)) Melbourne I think is slightly more affordable than Sydney (not by much though) but at least doesn't have the humidity. It seems to have ridiculous heatwaves but they break unlike here in Canberra where it's just never ending now. 

It's a tough one if you react to the heat. We are in Adelaide and yes it can get hot, stinking hot sometimes but usually it's shorter periods of time and not long runs of high temps. It's a dry climate on the gulf and suits us. I hate the 35C plus days much as anyone else but tbh find I get all my things done, just earlier or later in the day. And if I am working then it makes no difference anyways other than the drive to work and back. 

What I love about here is the access to the coast and beaches that we use lots in the summer, especially the evenings to cool off. And the city is lovely. Decent aircon helps in the heat. It has a pretty chilly winter on occasion and the odd frost in the foothills but it's not been freezing by any means. But it's still clearly winter. 

I couldn't live in Qld with the humidity. We did consider Melbourne but in the end the cost of property there and the possible long co,,ute from what we could afford to any work we might have was the breaker. 

[Guest]

39 minutes ago, torn said:

This. 

I think you might have hit the nail on the head. Thanks for your response. It has really helped to dim the rose tinted glasses. We haven't been happy in Canberra for quite a while and I have no desire to return to Sydney having grown up there so I think we need to cast the net a bit further in Oz/ NZ and see where might work down here. The points you made have really resonated. I know that the proximity to Europe is not as easy to put into practice as it is on paper. We also have friends who live in London who have told us about the fines implemented by the school system which I can understand in a way but also can see the additional strain they put on parents who are already juggling many balls. Also good to hear a take on the UK school system as I am pretty disenchanted with the system here so I guess it's no better over there, in fact it sounds worse. 

The spouse visa requirements have changed so much since we last applied which I wasn't aware of. It really is very difficult I can see to get a spouse over there and it looks now like it is a very stressful process. Funnily enough, my husband has a US passport and it seems it's much easier to get the equivalent to the spouse visa for the States than it is to get him into the UK. 

The spouse visa requirements are silly and over the top IMHO and have stopped many a couple from moving. Often where the sponsor is female and perhaps has not been the main earner due to taking time out for having kids. It makes it very hard to make the move back for many.

I have experienced the school system in England for 15 or so years through my working with kids. Tbh I much prefer the Aus system to date. The UK system, well, I'll talk English system, while certain universities are lauded and of course lots of kids leave school with amazing GCSE results, I found myself time and time again questioning the system that produces those results. I know the system is played and flawed. I am not naive enough to think it doesn't go on here too in its own way. Overall, as someone who has an interest and who has seen many kids go through the English system, I'd take the Aus one over it. 

[torn]

40 minutes ago, Toots said:

....................  as long as you can find employment.

I think Tassie would be great if it weren't for this. My business is mainland and so is husband's. If not, Tassie would definitely be the silver bullet solution. I am a little hesitant about prospects for the kids too. I have friends who grew up in Tassie and they loved it but haven't returned (even if they wanted to) because naturally the opportunities are OS/ mainland. 

 

[torn]

37 minutes ago, snifter said:

It's a tough one if you react to the heat. We are in Adelaide and yes it can get hot, stinking hot sometimes but usually it's shorter periods of time and not long runs of high temps. It's a dry climate on the gulf and suits us. I hate the 35C plus days much as anyone else but tbh find I get all my things done, just earlier or later in the day. And if I am working then it makes no difference anyways other than the drive to work and back. 

What I love about here is the access to the coast and beaches that we use lots in the summer, especially the evenings to cool off. And the city is lovely. Decent aircon helps in the heat. It has a pretty chilly winter on occasion and the odd frost in the foothills but it's not been freezing by any means. But it's still clearly winter. 

I couldn't live in Qld with the humidity. We did consider Melbourne but in the end the cost of property there and the possible long co,,ute from what we could afford to any work we might have was the breaker. 

Agree on the humidity front. I did that growing up in Sydney and that's nowhere near as bad as QLD but it was still pretty sticky and nasty in a school uniform. We are considering Melbourne which is actually cheaper to rent than here in Canberra! We would rent out our place here and rent in Melbourne. 

[torn]

26 minutes ago, snifter said:

The spouse visa requirements are silly and over the top IMHO and have stopped many a couple from moving. Often where the sponsor is female and perhaps has not been the main earner due to taking time out for having kids. It makes it very hard to make the move back for many.

I have experienced the school system in England for 15 or so years through my working with kids. Tbh I much prefer the Aus system to date. The UK system, well, I'll talk English system, while certain universities are lauded and of course lots of kids leave school with amazing GCSE results, I found myself time and time again questioning the system that produces those results. I know the system is played and flawed. I am not naive enough to think it doesn't go on here too in its own way. Overall, as someone who has an interest and who has seen many kids go through the English system, I'd take the Aus one over it. 

Good to know about the education system over there. It can definitely be played and the system is flawed over here but not to the same extent. I went to private school in Sydney and TBH am not that keen for my kids to go through the same system. It was an all girls cookie cutter school which I am sure suited lots but was very results driven and not really great for fostering divergent/ innovative thinkers. As far as I can tell, not much has changed. The Sydney private school circuit is pretty toxic. However, my cousin went to an elite school in the UK and it was much worse than my experiences in Sydney. There also doesn't seem to be the same emphasis put on what university you went to here. Yes, it's great to have got your degree through a G8 uni but if you didn't, you wouldn't expect to be at any real disadvantage at the end of the day. I think australia is still more of a level playing field in that regard but we'll see what happens when university deregulation bites hard. 

[Ferrets]

On 23/01/2018 at 17:11, torn said:

Yes the joys of living in a hot country with heat intolerance  

For what it's worth we live to the East of Brisbane on Moreton Bay; it's generally cooler than the western suburbs and the humidity is not really an issue.  We do enjoy the heat, but it's also a bit more stable so no crazy temps in tube 40s.  That said some days are chilling in the house with the aircon on

[BacktoDemocracy]

On 23/1/2018 at 00:40, torn said:

Hi all

 

I am a first generation australian, born and bred, to British parents. My dad was originally from Yorkshire and my Mum is from London. I grew up mainly on the Northern Beaches in Sydney which I didn't like at all as it's a bit of a cultural void. We spent a couple of years when I was 8-10 living on Guernsey and I have such great memories from this time. I think I actually felt like I belonged for the first time. Then I was ripped out and put back in Australia which I haven't really questioned until recently. 

DH is Australian, as are my two kids (6 and 8) and all their extended family (grandparents, cousins etc) but we don't see that much of extended family to be honest.  DH and the kids love living here but we all hate the heat and summer is just becoming almost intolerable. I have health issues (heat intolerance) which mean I am pretty much housebound during summer and unable to look after the kids and take them outside to do normal summer type things. We live in Canberra, which doesn't help, as it's searingly hot in summer, very cold in winter and, on the whole, pretty boring. We are thinking of moving to Melbourne, but I my daughter has bad eczema and I am not sure the longer, darker winters will do her any good and it doesn't help with my heat issues. 

I have this yearning to move back to the UK though and it's a scratch that is becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. I would love my kids to experience life over there and explore Europe and I love the idea of not having a searingly hot summer with blazing sun and blue skies (it becomes tedious to say the least). I love overcast weather and rain and European history. As my kids get older I am just so much more aware of how isolated Australia is and I'm not sure I like it any more. I feel like I have completely fallen out of love with the country, the expense, the climate and the education system. 

I don't know whether I am just seeing the UK through rose tinted glasses just because I am not happy with where I am. I try to convince myself that the winter is long and grey and would cause eczema problems with my daughter but I still feel this pull. I have always identified more strongly with being British than Australian but it hasn't bothered me as much as it does now. I just look back on my childhood and think that I have always felt like I was in the wrong place. On the flipside, all my old friends are here and DH's family and I don't know whether I could actually see myself growing old in the UK without that support. 

In short, I am unsettled and torn. 

Could I suggest that you do some reading of the Guardian web site, it does not have a pay wall, altho it is left leaning it would give you a unvarnished view of the UK and its downsides, it has opinion pieces on a range of subjects from environment to education, if you really want to get the cynics view get a subscription to 'Private eye'. 

[bunbury61]

On ‎23‎/‎01‎/‎2018 at 00:40, torn said:

Hi all

 

I am a first generation australian, born and bred, to British parents. My dad was originally from Yorkshire and my Mum is from London. I grew up mainly on the Northern Beaches in Sydney which I didn't like at all as it's a bit of a cultural void. We spent a couple of years when I was 8-10 living on Guernsey and I have such great memories from this time. I think I actually felt like I belonged for the first time. Then I was ripped out and put back in Australia which I haven't really questioned until recently. 

DH is Australian, as are my two kids (6 and 8) and all their extended family (grandparents, cousins etc) but we don't see that much of extended family to be honest.  DH and the kids love living here but we all hate the heat and summer is just becoming almost intolerable. I have health issues (heat intolerance) which mean I am pretty much housebound during summer and unable to look after the kids and take them outside to do normal summer type things. We live in Canberra, which doesn't help, as it's searingly hot in summer, very cold in winter and, on the whole, pretty boring. We are thinking of moving to Melbourne, but I my daughter has bad eczema and I am not sure the longer, darker winters will do her any good and it doesn't help with my heat issues. 

I have this yearning to move back to the UK though and it's a scratch that is becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. I would love my kids to experience life over there and explore Europe and I love the idea of not having a searingly hot summer with blazing sun and blue skies (it becomes tedious to say the least). I love overcast weather and rain and European history. As my kids get older I am just so much more aware of how isolated Australia is and I'm not sure I like it any more. I feel like I have completely fallen out of love with the country, the expense, the climate and the education system. 

I don't know whether I am just seeing the UK through rose tinted glasses just because I am not happy with where I am. I try to convince myself that the winter is long and grey and would cause eczema problems with my daughter but I still feel this pull. I have always identified more strongly with being British than Australian but it hasn't bothered me as much as it does now. I just look back on my childhood and think that I have always felt like I was in the wrong place. On the flipside, all my old friends are here and DH's family and I don't know whether I could actually see myself growing old in the UK without that support. 

In short, I am unsettled and torn. 

often people on this forum ,who want to return ,look at the u.k through rose tinted glasses ....it gives me a chuckle .

a few winter mornings ,sat on the m6 in traffic might change their minds ? or some of the urban areas I visit ,on a daily basis

the flip side is Britain has some seriously stunning places to live .

if you are missing the u.k ...DONT watch village of the year on channel 4 ....it makes me bloody homesick ,and I live here ??

some beautiful villages ....with a great lifestyle ...most of them ,I have never heard of ,in all 4 corners of the u.k

 

 

[bunbury61]

On ‎23‎/‎01‎/‎2018 at 05:39, snifter said:

I think part of your problem is probably living in Canberra. If you become disenchanted with the place you live, it can, will, eventually start to set your mind to longing for elsewhere or looking enviously at places others live and things they are doing. Being bored and frustrated with the place you live isn't ideal and you may find a move elsewhere in Aus is worth considering but it may still not solve all your woes and niggles. Only you know if you can get on with life in Aus and learn to cope with them, rather than letting them overtake you. 

I also think what you are remembering about your time there when you were a child should be exactly that. Childhood memories. You had none of the worries of finances, jobs, mortgage or kids of your own and looked at the world through a kids eyes. It was a different time in a place that isn't really realistic of living in the UK. 

What you need to focus on is the here and now and what , if anything the UK can offer you at this point in time and in the future. It may also be all a moot point if your husband isn't keen and doesn't want to uproot the family based on your longings for something that perhaps isn't what you think or are going for.

Quoll is fond of saying they are both first world countries, both have plus points and negatives.

Neither are perfect are they, let's be honest. 

The climate there is clearly changing. Milder winters, wetter and seasons out of whack somewhat but the darker winter months can and do drag IMHO when it's dark by 4-4:30pm and not light till gone 8am in the morning. I struggled with SAD in the UK, don't have that issue here. Slightly longer summer evenings there are nice but I also enjoy the more constant hours of daylight we have here and that winter days don't drag. It's still light here at 5-6pm and again light breaking by 6:30-7am over winter. 

I get the appeal of your kids experiencing Europe but honestly, the reality for many with kids is one trip somewhere, usually warm that kids will enjoy and then perhaps the odd break away elsewhere over the year. It's not people all trotting off for weekend breaks all over Europe so their kids can soak up the culture, far from it. Most people don't want to be hauling younger kids round capital cities, museums and monuments if they can help it. My friends vacation somewhere warm (with a beach usually) every year and then go camping once or twice or a mini break to Devon or some such. There are fines in the U.K. for taking kids out of school for holidays during term times and so holiday prices if taking a family can be rather staggering as at the mercy of peak seasons and tour operators.

Also the education systems isn't all that fantastic IMHO. The testing is ridiculous,  teaching to results, worrying about meeting targets and larger class numbers in primary are to me worrying. My son in reception had thirty per class from the off. Cramped as anything. In reception here he had less than twenty and then no more than twenty eight in year four. It's over thirty in his old school in England in year four. The amount of teachers that are poorly paid and overworked and who have to spend a silly amount of time on paperwork instead of teaching our kids is boggling. Yes the special needs support is better but you still need to strike lucky school wise and can sometimes have a battle on you hands to get your kid support or into a school. I have a number of friends who teach there and all of them really dislike the current system and set up. 

The partner visa now will require you to sponsor your husband. There is a big financial requirement to be met, either with you earning over x amount there or with a job offer for that or you having a lump sum up front. About 55K or so iirc. If you have money from a house sale or something that would be the sort of thing to cover it. It's not you have to pay it but you have to be able to show you have those funds and access to it so your husband isn't going to be a burden on the state. Iirc for every child also the salary requirement increases. So you could be needing closer to 25K salary wise. 

Like Cal we are happy here. My husband is an Aussie who spent 8 years in the UK with me. We returned to Aus about 4.5 years ago, son was 5 and we have no regrets. We were happy there, are happy here. I've been back twice since moving over and both times happy to come back here. So is my son. I also notice the places I visit have changed over the years and usually not for the better if living there. My old hometown is a hole now, spoilt by drugs, tourists and lack of local Gov funding. Schools are average, salaries not great but price of housing is silly money and many who grew up there are priced out of the area. I am very glad I left it at 21 and only wish my parents would move but for them while they know the problems and it upsets/angers them, they live on the outskirts in a lovely cottage so don't have to see the crap there every day. They usually go out of town for all their shopping etc. 

We plan to take a few months and travel round Europe when our son is a bit older. Go backpacking, see the sights and so on. Hubby did that when he was younger and old enough to appreciate it and wants to do the same with our son. Then once son is old enough to go travelling on his own he can go see it again or new places if he prefers. We'll encourage him to see the world for sure. We don't feel we have to live in the UK while he grows up for him to see those places in Europe though. There are other ways to achieve it for us  

 

I can agree with a lot of that ....but the long and cold winters are pretty much over in the u.k ....we haven't had one again ( although I do speak for the midlands ) .

if you base yourself in the u.k ,you have to take advantage of the advantages.

my daughters will be in Europe again this year ....venice for the 4th time ...rome also ....they have already done most of Europe ,which iam so glad we have done ( not the 2 weeks in Benidorm either)

I told them early on " live your life at the front end ,not the back " ...its no good doddering around visiting stuff when you are too old to enjoy it .

 

[vickyplum]

@torn, you say: 'We are thinking of moving to Melbourne, but I my daughter has bad eczema and I am not sure the longer, darker winters will do her any good and it doesn't help with my heat issues.

If you are thinking of moving to the UK (job, visa etc aside) you should go in December / Jan / Feb and you will soon find that Melbourne winters are a walk in the park in comparison!  Freezing wind blowing in your face, getting dark before 4pm... I get you don't like the intense heat, but UK will also provide you with long cold and dark   I love the Sydney winters and would very happily live somewhere with that climate all year round, but that magic egg hasn't hatched yet! 

 

[bunbury61]

36 minutes ago, vickyplum said:

@torn, you say: 'We are thinking of moving to Melbourne, but I my daughter has bad eczema and I am not sure the longer, darker winters will do her any good and it doesn't help with my heat issues.

If you are thinking of moving to the UK (job, visa etc aside) you should go in December / Jan / Feb and you will soon find that Melbourne winters are a walk in the park in comparison!  Freezing wind blowing in your face, getting dark before 4pm... I get you don't like the intense heat, but UK will also provide you with long cold and dark   I love the Sydney winters and would very happily live somewhere with that climate all year round, but that magic egg hasn't hatched yet! 

 

dark yes ....long maybe ...cold ,not anymore ....no biting winds ...very little snow ....its been a doddle again so far

[Toots]

1 hour ago, bunbury61 said:

dark yes ....long maybe ...cold ,not anymore ....no biting winds ...very little snow ....its been a doddle again so far

Aren't you lucky.  It's been far from that sort of weather for many other parts of the UK - especially the north and Scotland.  For them it's been snow, slush and rain - lots of it.  My sister is not looking forward to the weather when she goes back after 2 months away.

[bunbury61]

1 hour ago, Toots said:

Aren't you lucky.  It's been far from that sort of weather for many other parts of the UK - especially the north and Scotland.  For them it's been snow, slush and rain - lots of it.  My sister is not looking forward to the weather when she goes back after 2 months away.

its nothing like it use to be toots wherever you are in the u.k ....even in Scotland .

I can remember 6 ft snow drifts in the west midlands .in the 70s -80s...i noticed it changing in the 90s

Scotland has had a few weeks of snow ....but its changed so much

your sister will no doubt remember 1963 and 1979

we have had nothing of note since 2010 -11

[bunbury61]

9 minutes ago, bunbury61 said:

its nothing like it use to be toots wherever you are in the u.k ....even in Scotland .

I can remember 6 ft snow drifts in the west midlands .in the 70s -80s...i noticed it changing in the 90s

Scotland has had a few weeks of snow ....but its changed so much

your sister will no doubt remember 1963 and 1979

we have had nothing of note since 2010 -11

toots - its mid winter and 6c today in Aberdeen ...thats so much warmer than it used to be

[bunbury61]

11 hours ago, bunbury61 said:

toots - its mid winter and 6c today in Aberdeen ...thats so much warmer than it used to be

and 10c plus in large parts of Scotland tomorrow

[ali]

30 minutes ago, bunbury61 said:

and 10c plus in large parts of Scotland tomorrow

My son is visiting the North West - don't know what the temperatures have been, but he's been "freezing" since he arrived.  

[simmo]

22 hours ago, bunbury61 said:

dark yes ....long maybe ...cold ,not anymore ....no biting winds ...very little snow ....its been a doddle again so far

Is that your back garden?  What a stunning view!

[bristolman]

On 26/01/2018 at 11:07, Toots said:

Aren't you lucky.  It's been far from that sort of weather for many other parts of the UK - especially the north and Scotland.  For them it's been snow, slush and rain - lots of it.  My sister is not looking forward to the weather when she goes back after 2 months away.

Yes but in fairness you can say that about anywhere, my mum used to tell me what it was like in Geelong (bitterly cold and windy)while we were basking in sunshine. Even though the UK is fairly small the weather varies enormously. 

[bunbury61]

15 hours ago, ali said:

My son is visiting the North West - don't know what the temperatures have been, but he's been "freezing" since he arrived.  

with all due respect Ali ...he would be ...travelling from an oz summer to the middle of the u.k winter ...doh

its like leaving the u.k in January ,arriving in oz and saying " its too hot " ?

its 9c as I type

 

[Toots]

7 hours ago, bristolman said:

Yes but in fairness you can say that about anywhere, my mum used to tell me what it was like in Geelong (bitterly cold and windy)while we were basking in sunshine. Even though the UK is fairly small the weather varies enormously. 

True that.  Even here in Tassie the weather can vary quite a bit from place to place.  Hobart can get really very warm.  The west coast can have temps 10 degrees higher than here on the north west coast.  Today it's going to reach 28C here and 35C is forecast for Hobart.  Oh for a good storm to come through to cool everything down.

[ali]

9 hours ago, bunbury61 said:

with all due respect Ali ...he would be ...travelling from an oz summer to the middle of the u.k winter ...doh

its like leaving the u.k in January ,arriving in oz and saying " its too hot " ?

its 9c as I type

 

Yes I do understand that .. just a comment about the weather - don't read too much into it.

[Newstart]

Being Sydney born and raised , I really dislike the heat and always thought I preferred Winter. However, after five years living in the South of England, I’m over the weather.

It’s dark, been wet and  raining a lot, we have had snow before as well as after Christmas and it has been freezing! I can’t wait for spring to arrive! Lol When I first arrived over here, I couldn’t understand why people complained about the weather a lot. It took a while but I have turned into one off them. 

Seriously, it’s going to be a lot cheaper to buy a new air conditioner than moving overseas. And like others have said, it could just be Canberra.

Unless you have the time, and lots of money for flights, accommodation, cost of tourist attractions, eating out etc. You won’t be off to Europe that often. 

I did consider moving to Bath, Bournemouth and Cornwall. However as my husband said, you still have to spend most of the year dealing with the aweful weather.

I would come for a hoilday first. Have a look at where you would like to live. Look at the type of houses ; very different to what your used to in Australia, and costs, the same types of business you both run and see what the average turn over is as well as dealing with the nightmare as a self-employed person that is HMRC!!! 

Both countries have their good and bad bits. Regardless of where you move to, moving from one place to another won’t solve your problems. At this point in our lives as well as our future goals, OZ is going to provide us with the lifestyle we want. Besides weather, think about your dreams and what kind of lifestyle you, your husband and kids want and work out which country will best provide it for you.

 

 

 

 

 

[bristolman]

9 minutes ago, Newstart said:

Being Sydney born and raised , I really dislike the heat and always thought I preferred Winter. However, after five years living in the South of England, I’m over the weather.

It’s dark, been wet and  raining a lot, we have had snow before as well as after Christmas and it has been freezing! I can’t wait for spring to arrive! Lol When I first arrived over here, I couldn’t understand why people complained about the weather a lot. It took a while but I have turned into one off them. 

Seriously, it’s going to be a lot cheaper to buy a new air conditioner than moving overseas. And like others have said, it could just be Canberra.

Unless you have the time, and lots of money for flights, accommodation, cost of tourist attractions, eating out etc. You won’t be off to Europe that often. 

I did consider moving to Bath, Bournemouth and Cornwall. However as my husband said, you still have to spend most of the year dealing with the aweful weather.

I would come for a hoilday first. Have a look at where you would like to live. Look at the type of houses ; very different to what your used to in Australia, and costs, the same types of business you both run and see what the average turn over is as well as dealing with the nightmare as a self-employed person that is HMRC!!! 

Both countries have their good and bad bits. Regardless of where you move to, moving from one place to another won’t solve your problems. At this point in our lives as well as our future goals, OZ is going to provide us with the lifestyle we want. Besides weather, think about your dreams and what kind of lifestyle you, your husband and kids want and work out which country will best provide it for you.

 

 

 

 

 

. 

I really don't understand this idea that you spend most of the year dealing with awful weather, it just isn't the case lol.

I do agree that everyone should have a holiday here before committing to the move, just as you would before moving to Australia or anywhere else. It's what I did, I came here for a few weeks and realised it was where I wanted to be and it has given us the lifestyle we want. None of us miss the relentless heat to be fair. Life under an air conditioner doesn' sound to appealing really. 

We have friends that are forever jetting off to Europe or America, it's very cheap and we intend joining them a few times this year. 

I think we just have to accept that people want to live in different places and always will. 

[bristolman]

On 23/01/2018 at 00:40, torn said:

Hi all

 

I am a first generation australian, born and bred, to British parents. My dad was originally from Yorkshire and my Mum is from London. I grew up mainly on the Northern Beaches in Sydney which I didn't like at all as it's a bit of a cultural void. We spent a couple of years when I was 8-10 living on Guernsey and I have such great memories from this time. I think I actually felt like I belonged for the first time. Then I was ripped out and put back in Australia which I haven't really questioned until recently. 

DH is Australian, as are my two kids (6 and 8) and all their extended family (grandparents, cousins etc) but we don't see that much of extended family to be honest.  DH and the kids love living here but we all hate the heat and summer is just becoming almost intolerable. I have health issues (heat intolerance) which mean I am pretty much housebound during summer and unable to look after the kids and take them outside to do normal summer type things. We live in Canberra, which doesn't help, as it's searingly hot in summer, very cold in winter and, on the whole, pretty boring. We are thinking of moving to Melbourne, but I my daughter has bad eczema and I am not sure the longer, darker winters will do her any good and it doesn't help with my heat issues. 

I have this yearning to move back to the UK though and it's a scratch that is becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. I would love my kids to experience life over there and explore Europe and I love the idea of not having a searingly hot summer with blazing sun and blue skies (it becomes tedious to say the least). I love overcast weather and rain and European history. As my kids get older I am just so much more aware of how isolated Australia is and I'm not sure I like it any more. I feel like I have completely fallen out of love with the country, the expense, the climate and the education system. 

I don't know whether I am just seeing the UK through rose tinted glasses just because I am not happy with where I am. I try to convince myself that the winter is long and grey and would cause eczema problems with my daughter but I still feel this pull. I have always identified more strongly with being British than Australian but it hasn't bothered me as much as it does now. I just look back on my childhood and think that I have always felt like I was in the wrong place. On the flipside, all my old friends are here and DH's family and I don't know whether I could actually see myself growing old in the UK without that support. 

In short, I am unsettled and torn. 

Hi Tom,

I realised I hadn't actually replied to you directly. It's a horrible feeling knowing you are in the wrong place and it's how I started to feel the last few years I was in Australia. I wasn' born in Australia but was only 18 months old when I arrived there so I grew up an Aussie. After a few extended stays in England I realised I was much more English than Australian. Long story short we moved our family to England coming up to 6 years ago now and we love it. Our boys were almost 11 when got here and took to it like a duck to water and both say they have no interest in returning and England is home. Now this makes it sound as though I hate Australia but that is far from true, I hate the relentless heat and I hate how expensive it has become. It's interesting that many people talk about Australia's weather as a positive but it's a major negative for us.

Our boys are doing really well in school, they are now in 6th Form and excelling. 

I don't think you are seeing the UK through rose tinted glasses at all, it's a wonderful place to live with lots of opportunities, it may not be as good if you are into surfing or some other outdoor stuff but honestly 7 or 8 months of the year are really nice, 2 are a bit iffy and the rest are pretty ordinary. I was in shorts in November and I was far from the only one. 

Give it a go, I reckon you will love it

[Martinbjulieb]

On 23/01/2018 at 07:10, torn said:

Yes I feel like it's a now or never situation as my 8 year old will soon become too old to move I think. I like Brisbane but it's too humid and hot for me and Perth is just too far away from anything (sorry to those who live in and love Perth :)) Melbourne I think is slightly more affordable than Sydney (not by much though) but at least doesn't have the humidity. It seems to have ridiculous heatwaves but they break unlike here in Canberra where it's just never ending now. 

It definitely is, one of our many reasons for returning to the U.K. after 10 years. Also Perth is unbelievably hot, from November to April it was unbearable (for us) others love it but we found it debilitating. We grew to love July and August!