corkyball Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi. Myself, my wife and two young kids (3 and 7 months) are finally thinking of making the move to live in Brisbane, more precisely the bayside area, We would be looking to go before January 2015ish as we were hoping to start our youngest at school the same time as everyone else. We have decided to at least go over and try it for two years as my wife doesn't like to think of it as forever at the moment. However I do have concerns about spending all this money to go across and all it would be is just a countdown until we come home again and if we know we are coming back in two years maybe it will be hard to actually settle and get through the first few difficult months without thinking about that time we would return home. Has anyone else gone across and been unsure and said we will try it for two years and how did it turn out for you? Thanks in advance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blossom Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Have you checked if you are eligible for a visa yet? Unfortunately many people make this decision then realise they actually do not have that option. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VERYSTORMY Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I think you are on very shaky ground. This place is peppered with accounts of marriages and immigration that fail because one has driven the move while the other didn't really want to. This is a hard stressful process and unless your BOTH 100% committed then I would think again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corkyball Posted July 26, 2013 Author Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi Blossom79. Yes we are eligible we would go for the 189 visa as we have 70 points, at the moment although it was 75 when we first started planning, and reckon it gives us more flexibility. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corkyball Posted July 26, 2013 Author Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi Verystormy. Thanks for your reply I am very aware of this and hence why we have not gone yet as I would never apply for the visa without total commitment as like most others I don't have £4k (now) to just throw at something. I suppose this is the problem my wife says she is now 100% committed to go for two years and is now the one pushing the move and wanting to go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi Verystormy. Thanks for your reply I am very aware of this and hence why we have not gone yet as I would never apply for the visa without total commitment as like most others I don't have £4k (now) to just throw at something. I suppose this is the problem my wife says she is now 100% committed to go for two years and is now the one pushing the move and wanting to go. It takes an absolute minimum of 3 years to even begin to understand Australia, and start to feel settled. Seriously, have a rethink. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redrover Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I think in some ways going over with a view to staying for a temporary period is healthy. It takes the pressure of thinking you have to make it work, encourages you to see the place a bit as you may not be here forever and makes taking the rough with the smooth easier. At least that's our experience so far. But the big question is cost - can you afford it if its only a couple of years? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi. Myself, my wife and two young kids (3 and 7 months) are finally thinking of making the move to live in Brisbane, more precisely the bayside area, We would be looking to go before January 2015ish as we were hoping to start our youngest at school the same time as everyone else. We have decided to at least go over and try it for two years as my wife doesn't like to think of it as forever at the moment. However I do have concerns about spending all this money to go across and all it would be is just a countdown until we come home again and if we know we are coming back in two years maybe it will be hard to actually settle and get through the first few difficult months without thinking about that time we would return home. Has anyone else gone across and been unsure and said we will try it for two years and how did it turn out for you? Thanks in advance We made a deal, although our deal was four years not two (we are not at four years yet). But if you make a deal, you need to both be prepared to stick to it, no matter what and don't let money come into it. Migration is expensive and for some it will be an expensive mistake. If you don't want to risk the money, then don't do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Ropey HOFF Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I think this is a good plan, we had a family conference and we all agreed to give it 4 years to get citizenship to allow us all to live in either of the two best countries in the world to live in. Your situation sounds similar, only it's 2 years, I think once your wife sees just how great it is over there, you will be able to convince her to stay to get citizenship, you have got over the main hurdle of going and Yes' you have agreed on 2 years at first, but that's just a ball park figure of time. Who knows what will happen when you get there, but it must be quite common this sort of arrangement. Best of luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corkyball Posted July 26, 2013 Author Share Posted July 26, 2013 Thank you everyone for your comments I really do appreciate it. Really helps getting advice from people who have actually been in the same position, all you seem to get from family and friends is 'Just Do It'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wolvesaussie Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Im not sure about deals, does it mean one person is always ticking down till the time and doesn't try to settle? especially if only 2 years its not long. I offered a deal to my girlfriend but she refused and said if we go we go forever... I tried to say we don't have to move all our stuff over in case she isn't happy but she's in for a penny in for a pound by the looks, lets like it stays like that, we taking everything Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
runslikeafish Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I think it's a good idea. I think this gives you the opportunity to give it a good amount of time to really see if it's for you without the potential pressure of it definitely being a permanent move. If you're both committed to give it a good go for at least two years it sounds good to me. Try and make as many friends as you can when you arrive and you'll settle right in! Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 We've agreed 4 years to get citizenship (same as Hoff) and have agreed that if either of us is unhappy, we will go back. It gives us a focus and an opt out if it does not work out as we hope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Levi Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I am also giving it a go for 2-4 years, at the minimum to get citizenship. I am going alone, sister is in Perth with her family. Some people opt not to sell their house at their current location, but rent it out - so have this in mind too. If you need to go back, then having the house is a big help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Ropey HOFF Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 This is one of the reasons why the figures of migrants coming back is at the level it is. Pre planned returnees who had never intended to migrate forever, just to either get citizenship, or just for a life changing experience. Most people love Australia, only a very small percentage of returnees didn't like it, well ...... What's not to like? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 This is one of the reasons why the figures of migrants coming back is at the level it is. Pre planned returnees who had never intended to migrate forever, just to either get citizenship, or just for a life changing experience. Most people love Australia, only a very small percentage of returnees didn't like it, well ...... What's not to like? It's not always down to whether or not you like it. It's about giving yourself the best chance of success. Going somewhere forever is a big deal and a lot more scary than going for a couple of years. I met an elderly couple yesterday who stay in Australia for 2 years at a time. I thought it a bit strange, as they had Australian accents. The lady smiled at me and said they had actually been here for 30 years. They came for 2 years, liked it so stayed for another 2 years. They were still happy so they extended for another 2 years and so on. Thirty years on they are still extending their stay for 2 years at a time. I asked why they did that and she said it just removes the pressure from them. So many people feel, or are made to feel, like failures, if they don't stay and go home for whatever reason, so by saying they would just stay for 2 more years, if they decided to go home, they could turn round and say (to themselves) that they did what they came to do and they succeeded. I thought it was great advice! When she came you could get citizenship after 2 years, rather than the 4 it is today which is why they chose to stay for 2 years at a time. However staying or going is not always about "what's not to like". Sometimes the pull for the familiar is overwhelming, sometimes the needs of family outweigh your own needs, sometimes feeling so far away from friends you grew up with is just overwhelming and it does not matter how much you like where you are, the pull to go home is stronger. For some home is a place or a country. For some it is where their families are. For some it is wherever they happen to be at that stage in their life. For others it is a fantasy place that only exists in their hearts and no matter how hard they search, they will never find it until they look inside themselves to find out what really matters to them. Sometimes the internal journey is only actually embarked upon once they have made the decision to move to the other side of the world, and only completed when they have worked out what is important to them and where they want to be. Only then do they really, truly, find home and the happiness they are seeking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
debbio Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi corky... We are also doing the two year thing I love the story about the elderly couple - two years at at time - hope thats me one day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Forever is crippling - go with "as long as it floats your boat" and if it doesn't in 2 yrs or 20 yrs then move on. I guess you both have to have a lot of trust in each other that one of you will move on if the other wants to even if you don't. When you are footloose and fancy free and no kids then you can do what you like but once you bring kids into the equation there is a risk that one parent could be trapped in Aus even if they wanted to return to UK with the kids - the other only has to say no, you can't go and the law will prevent them from moving - dead scary! If you are going for the adventure then don't burn any bridges - keep your house and rent it out, take a career break etc. personally I don't think having any of those in the background makes settling any harder although some seem to think it would - it just means you are more relaxed about doing the settling because if you screw up its no big deal - less pressure so you can work on things without the fear of devastation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi corky...We are also doing the two year thing I love the story about the elderly couple - two years at at time - hope thats me one day Make it 3 years..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ItchyFeet76 Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Hi there, We're looking at doing a similar thing. My husband is hoping to get sponsorship (via a 457 visa) - probably next Autumn - and for us to go over for a few years, try and obtain PR if possible (to keep the door open incase we love it but have to return to the UK for some reason) and, if we hate it, chalk it down to experience. The money does concern us - we'd be crazy for it not to - but the way we see it is it's better to regret the things you HAVE done than the things you haven't. We've been pondering this for years and now we've lost too many points (due to age) procrastinating, so a 457 is our only route in. If we love it then great, either we stay (if possible) or return with happy memories. If we hate it then at least we'll have given it a go and won't regret never having tried it, and hating it would make our return to the UK a comparatively positive one. We just don't want to be on our deathbeds many (hopefully) years from now, stuck in the UK, never having given it a shot. Life is short. We may get cancer tomorrow or our parents may die next week. If either of those happen then Australia is out of the question. Doing it within the next year or so means we can hopefully get it out of our systems (tick the box, so to speak) and come back and stay in the UK forever, knowing we've at least given it a shot. Hope all that makes sense! I-F :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ItchyFeet76 Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 P.S. Can't say the thought of all that paperwork and hassle (renting house out - paying extra to do so, selling everything and buying it again, disrupting kids' schooling, etc.) doesn't put me off some days though! It would be so easy to stay where we are (if the weather was better it might encourage me, lol), but this 'itch' has been bugging us for so long and we've got such a small window within which to 'scratch' it.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petals Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I have a worry about time lines, if you create one it tends to hang over your life. I believe you move to another country because you want to live there and see what it has to offer. Then you just wait and see what happens, you may love it, you may hate it, one thing I do know though is that there are not many migrants who move over and do not wonder "have we/I made the right decision" when it is realised that that Australia is so different to where they live and there are so many things that are done differently and this will never change. Its not going to ever be UK with sun. The countryside is not pretty to new eyes, its wonderful to me because I love the difference and the ruggedness and isolation that the countryside offers, but if you are coming from a small green county in Uk with Mum and Dad up the road in the next town, its very very daunting. Migrants we must be independent to succeed I believe. In our lives we are always going to have to be independent at some stage so why not by migration. Looking at my Aus children they are so happy and this is their home, and it is mine on loan. As I will always be a migrant and my roots will always be in UK but I can't change that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 I have a worry about time lines, if you create one it tends to hang over your life. I believe you move to another country because you want to live there and see what it has to offer. Then you just wait and see what happens, you may love it, you may hate it, one thing I do know though is that there are not many migrants who move over and do not wonder "have we/I made the right decision" when it is realised that that Australia is so different to where they live and there are so many things that are done differently and this will never change. Its not going to ever be UK with sun. The countryside is not pretty to new eyes, its wonderful to me because I love the difference and the ruggedness and isolation that the countryside offers, but if you are coming from a small green county in Uk with Mum and Dad up the road in the next town, its very very daunting. Migrants we must be independent to succeed I believe. In our lives we are always going to have to be independent at some stage so why not by migration. Looking at my Aus children they are so happy and this is their home, and it is mine on loan. As I will always be a migrant and my roots will always be in UK but I can't change that. Why won't it change, it did for us? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Im not sure about deals, does it mean one person is always ticking down till the time and doesn't try to settle? especially if only 2 years its not long. I offered a deal to my girlfriend but she refused and said if we go we go forever... I tried to say we don't have to move all our stuff over in case she isn't happy but she's in for a penny in for a pound by the looks, lets like it stays like that, we taking everything No I don't think that at all. We have a deal that it would be minimum four years, and it is just that, a get out clause should it be required. It has made no difference whatsoever to settling, in fact it has even made it easier as it takes the pressure off and there is no need to panic or feeling of being trapped. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
corkyball Posted July 29, 2013 Author Share Posted July 29, 2013 Hi Everyone. Thank you for all the comments it does make good reading and am taking all points on board. Sorry about not responding moved house couple of weeks ago and still waiting for internet to get set up, not sure how anybody could cope without it now. Had discussion over weekend together and feel more confident about the whole process. Funny how it seems easier to discuss things with complete strangers than loved ones..... Going to apply for ANMAC now, hopefully have this in right order. Still feels along way away though from going though under 18 months and counting... Many Thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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