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Desire to Leave and Desire to go Back


doubter

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Had a burning desire to back to Uk which I did after going through all the normal feelings but threw the towel in early.Read quite a few posts on how people felt or close to depression.I felt thst could have crept in even though when the time came to leave Some of those feelings had left and I was settling in much better.

Having been back in UK for 2 years I have a burning desire to go back. Am I a ping pong pom or do I have issues?

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It's probably more an itch for adventure than anything else - curse of the expat! At the end of the day life is mundane, you still have to wash the dishes and put the rubbish out no matter where you are and I think it is the mundane that drives people to seek change. The grass isn't greener anywhere and it still needs mowing no matter where you are!

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I needed to change job, suburb, town maybe not country, days off were great loved OZ. A visit home would have confirmed this not a permanent move.Unfortunately the family are not feeling the same though it is currently 2 vs 2 :xmas24:

Winter blues set in now even though I enjoyed the first winter back as it was a novelty. If only I knew what zi know now but I wouldnt listen at the time. I did want to move at the time rather than come back to UK and had a transfer accepted with work but wife wouldnt let the kids go through the change again which I accepted as I had to think about them as well.

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Had a burning desire to back to Uk which I did after going through all the normal feelings but threw the towel in early.Read quite a few posts on how people felt or close to depression.I felt thst could have crept in even though when the time came to leave Some of those feelings had left and I was settling in much better.

Having been back in UK for 2 years I have a burning desire to go back. Am I a ping pong pom or do I have issues?

 

The saying is "act in haste, repent at leisure". I am an impetuous person so can understand, however my oh is the complete opposite and a foil and its worked wonders for us over the years.

 

Despite what we think children are very very resilient. My brother and I were moved from pillar to post by our parents, cannot count the no of schools we went to. We both grew up fine and happy, not quite as extended family orientated as some, but look on that as a good thing, totally independent and it made us stronger as people. I look at my children who have lived in the same place, went to a couple of schools etc, they are so different from me. Wish they had a bit more of my independence and thirst for adventure.

 

I am of the opinion that we cannot go back, because going back is trying to live in the past. Not just returning anywhere in all aspects of our lives. Relationship break up for example, never return to it, its never the same. Nothing is the same once we move forward. Forward is what we have to be. Life is what we make it, we can be happy in a tent and I certainly would be if I had to be. I would not like it at first but I know that I would get used to it and make it a home. Its an attitude.

 

Even though I am happy here in Aus I do think, oh lovely cottage, roses round the door, then I read the weather forecast this weekend and think, oh no no no. :xmas4:

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The saying is "act in haste, repent at leisure". I am an impetuous person so can understand, however my oh is the complete opposite and a foil and its worked wonders for us over the years.

 

Despite what we think children are very very resilient. My brother and I were moved from pillar to post by our parents, cannot count the no of schools we went to. We both grew up fine and happy, not quite as extended family orientated as some, but look on that as a good thing, totally independent and it made us stronger as people. I look at my children who have lived in the same place, went to a couple of schools etc, they are so different from me. Wish they had a bit more of my independence and thirst for adventure.

 

I am of the opinion that we cannot go back, because going back is trying to live in the past. Not just returning anywhere in all aspects of our lives. Relationship break up for example, never return to it, its never the same. Nothing is the same once we move forward. Forward is what we have to be. Life is what we make it, we can be happy in a tent and I certainly would be if I had to be. I would not like it at first but I know that I would get used to it and make it a home. Its an attitude.

 

Even though I am happy here in Aus I do think, oh lovely cottage, roses round the door, then I read the weather forecast this weekend and think, oh no no no. :xmas4:

 

you're so right! When I was in Australia travelling i wasn't home sick, but then we moved to bournemouth cos of my going to uni, and I just longed for everthing to be how it was before I went to aus, in Portsmouth with my old job and having friends and family around me , but this time with Paul. so when we went to NZ on whim in the hope to move to Aus afterwards, I still had this longing to just BE back where I was before all this craziness started....well we came back, and NOTHING is the same, obviously my family and friends are the same people but it's not the same....and now i'm thinking i wished I had toughed it out in nz, or just waited longer before making a big decision to go back to aus .... but hey ho....that's hindsight for you and you can never predict how you feel. So now we're back in the UK we'll be spending the nxt few years getting back to aus lol.

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The saying is "act in haste, repent at leisure". I am an impetuous person so can understand, however my oh is the complete opposite and a foil and its worked wonders for us over the years.

 

Despite what we think children are very very resilient. My brother and I were moved from pillar to post by our parents, cannot count the no of schools we went to. We both grew up fine and happy, not quite as extended family orientated as some, but look on that as a good thing, totally independent and it made us stronger as people. I look at my children who have lived in the same place, went to a couple of schools etc, they are so different from me. Wish they had a bit more of my independence and thirst for adventure.

 

I am of the opinion that we cannot go back, because going back is trying to live in the past. Not just returning anywhere in all aspects of our lives. Relationship break up for example, never return to it, its never the same. Nothing is the same once we move forward. Forward is what we have to be. Life is what we make it, we can be happy in a tent and I certainly would be if I had to be. I would not like it at first but I know that I would get used to it and make it a home. Its an attitude.

 

Even though I am happy here in Aus I do think, oh lovely cottage, roses round the door, then I read the weather forecast this weekend and think, oh no no no. :xmas4:

What a great post Petals!My kids were also moved around alot (OH worked as a mobile farm manager)but they have done so well in their lives and yes they're both strong minded kids.Yes I deffo think its all about attitude too.I have a comfortable house,but could happily reside in a yurt.We have a few friends who live off grid and they're always happy!

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Another one "no good crying over spillt milk". Is so true. Due to the health issues in my family I have been a lot happier living day to day rather than in the past and in the future. Not that I am happy with the health issues but it just makes me realise what is important in life. Its us "today". Waste too much time on what ifs, I was guilty of this, wonder how many hours of my life have been wasted on what ifs? Um way too many.

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