Your FAILURE to settle in Oz

[jumpingjellybean]

OR

 

 

Don’t be afraid to fail ~

 

Be afraid not to try!

[wattsy1982]

Surely you only fail if you do not acheive a set target or goal???

 

If you merely tell yourself you are going to move to Australia, without any goals, targets, time frame or definitive tasks etc (like us) then you havent failed....but also, you haven't succeeded either.

 

I think people put way too much pressure on emigrating/moving abroad that they set themselves up to look like they have 'failed' if they dont stay.

 

We said "lets move to Australia and go and see what its like" no time frame or any goals...so theoretically we cant fail, even if we had only lived here for 6 months we had achieved what we set out to do.

 

Lifes too short and there are enough stresses and pressures out of our control without being a critic/judge towards yourself also.

[HelensvaleHoward]

Not really Howard, this forum is for everyone, in fact if we went off the title no one in the UK could post and if you weren't a Pom you wouldn't be able to post. This forum is for EVERYONE to share their experiences good or bad.

Oh I agree don't get me wrong

 

Just too many who haven't lived here for a long long time giving old advice just seems daft to me

 

All I know is those who I've helped especially via PM have had honest up to date advice

 

I'm living it every day

 

When I read on here someone telling me that Australia is ...

 

Guess what they found it on a link on the web

 

But as I'm learning

 

It's only a forum

[flag of convenience]

And others who have been here even longer and may give a slightly differing take on things. As you say living here day to day.

[HelensvaleHoward]

And others who have been here even longer and may give a slightly differing take on things. As you say living here day to day.

Correct and your still living it on a day to day basis

[Quinkla]

I always find it interesting that I know a number of African people who have moved to Oz and the UK and didn't last and went home. Even though home is a mud hut.

Of course. Because Africans have friends and family too that they will miss. They might be aggrieved that they can't get mealie meal for breakfast; or miss sitting outside their front door in the warm evening sun; or not like all the rules and regulations; or miss seeing elephants; or miss the smell of freshly baked sweet bread; or miss seeing the stars in a perfectly clear sky; or miss the safety of not locking doors. And that's me speculating about possible reasons in just one village I saw in Namibia. People in developing nations have plenty to get homesick about - and being pitched into a high rise in a major city where you know no-one and have no money is a miserable, isolating experience.

[flag of convenience]

Correct and your still living it on a day to day basis

 

A day to day basis but with greater insight.

[flag of convenience]

Of course. Because Africans have friends and family too that they will miss. They might be aggrieved that they can't get mealie meal for breakfast; or miss sitting outside their front door in the warm evening sun; or not like all the rules and regulations; or miss seeing elephants; or miss the smell of freshly baked sweet bread; or miss seeing the stars in a perfectly clear sky; or miss the safety of not locking doors. And that's me speculating about possible reasons in just one village I saw in Namibia. People in developing nations have plenty to get homesick about - and being pitched into a high rise in a major city where you know no-one and have no money is a miserable, isolating experience.

 

I doubt whether very many have returned to live in mud huts, although admit to being without much knowledge of living conditions in South Sudan, where two I know returned to over the past eighteen months. I think both returned in the hope of gaining positions of some influence in the newly created state. As such possibly something a little more grand but only guessing.

Another that returned to Kenya, claiming a better life, was certainly not going to be residing in a mud hut. Neither a wooden one. Hailed from a very exclusive part of Nairobi and considered life far better there than Perth.

Yep. I love Namibia. Apart from the driving. Had a auto accident there and ran off the road. A very high road toll there I later found out.Shades of Northern Australia. What's that saying in Africa? A child belongs to the village. Still there are some rather extremes in economic depravation that surely impacts on those without the ability through little fault of their own to escape from.

[Quinkla]

I doubt whether very many have returned to live in mud huts.

 

Agreed the people in mud hut villages are unlikely to be international migrants, although a fair few end up migrating to the cities. In parts of Africa, mud is a perfectly sensible thing to use for building. It is robust, breathable and affordable. Why would you bake bricks when mud will do the job just as well.

 

Interestingly, one of the things I spotted in Laos is that as some people in villages have started to get richer, they have replaced the wooden walls of their houses with brick, and enclosed the working area underneath the house. This is doubtless trendy and modern, but it makes the houses less breathable, hotter and stuffier. Sometimes houses built from mud or wood were not just because there was no money for alternative sources, it was because they were the right materials for the job.

[Petals]

Not a failure to settle, on with the next adventure and don't has to ask permission.

[starlight7]

At least the topic didn't fail to get us talking!

[Perthbum]

At least the topic didn't fail to get us talking!

As do most of my threads, I am marmite.

[HelensvaleHoward]

A day to day basis but with greater insight.

Quite possible indeed

[Guest]

Re the 'failure' tag that some people like to chuck at others, I can only think that it stems from two things. Firstly, an irritation on the part of some Brits who've made Australia home and who are nettled when the others make criticisms of their adopted country. Secondly, a desire on the part of some of those posters to big themselves as 'winners' of the immigration game, 'good Poms,' who get Australia(ns), as opposed to the 'losers' or 'failures' who forever find fault with the place until they eventually slink back to the UK forever casting bitter and regretful glances in Australia's direction.

 

That might apply to some people I suppose, and some criticisms of the place are probably unfair, but not all. I don't think that Australia is above criticism. Is any country for that matter? If a country sells itself to the world as 'paradise,' where you can 'live the dream' etc then it's always going to incur criticisms when it doesn't measure up to some people's expectations. Moving countries is an expensive, stressful and emotional experience and when it doesn't work out as hoped, people are gonna vent. I don't think that that makes them failures, it just makes them human.

[starlight7]

 

As do most of my threads, I am marmite.

East West Vegemite's Best.

[Quinkla]

East West Vegemite's Best.

Not in chocolate it isn't.

[kiwiathome]

Are you kidding? This is hilarious. Who has time to talk about mud huts and elephants! The most interesting thing about this is, Perthbum I love your picture. Is this James Bond inspired? Cool.

 

Seriously, I know we all would love to bitch and gossip at a coffee shop, but can we get something constructive in here???

[Quinkla]

Are you kidding? This is hilarious. Who has time to talk about mud huts and elephants!

It's actually a serious and important point. People in Australia imagine that migrants from "poor" countries should be extremely grateful for the opportunity to live in a "rich" country, and imagine that feeling homesick or returning home would be the preserve of migrants from other "rich" countries. But actually, people from developing countries can feel just as homesick and dislocated; can be deeply unhappy in Australia; and may want to return home. Plus, there is an assumption that people in developing countries are always preoccupied with their poverty. In fact, when you go there it all feels normal and life goes on just like here.

[kiwiathome]

I recommend a strong gin and tonic and some lavender oil. Bless.

[kiwiathome]

Logged in so might as well keep going for a moment. Here is the good. Toast to you perthbum, love your picture. Toast to you Howard, happy birthday. Anyone who is super upset by this thread, find your favourite way to chill. I like Helensvale, fantastic theme parks. But I like England more.

 

But tonight I have had the most excellent Jacobs Creek Reserve Chardonnay. Only half a bottle, cause health conscious. But I would find talking about wine more interesting than this thread. Sometimes we just all need to talk, no matter what it is about.

 

I have not been on this forum long. But have now been able to predict who the "likes" below will come up as. Their seems to be a "team" side thing going on. We are all human, no one is right or wrong. And you must of known starting this thread you would set the dogs off chasing you. But maybe you just needed a chat, and this is a forum, so fair enough. And also, I like others have come on and posted, so we must all find this interesting in some degree.

[jdad84]

Not every utterance or written response needs to be an academic objective piece. Sometimes something from the heart or subjective can be far more revealing as to how things at ground level are found. Most would have the wisdom to realise it is from a personal insight.

 

 

Whilst I agree with your first comment I disagree with the second sentence - 'something from the heart' as I find this more often reveals a lot about the person and very little about how things really are at ground level.

 

Things I've seen written and have assimilated into some generic examples..

 

'The city is so expensive, it costs a bomb to do anything and there's traffic everywhere' - I didn't do research, otherwise I'd have expected the city, like many other cities to be expensive and decide to move there knowing this or choose elsewhere to live'

 

'I've found australians to be generally unfriendly' - I'm unhappy - help me validate my unhappiness and share this feeling by grouping a country of people together and label them all as if they were one person

 

I really love reading the posts where people are subjective, heart on the sleeve stuff, good or bad...whilst also being honest (objective)....these posts I find the most insightful.

[Guest]

I think the answer is different for different people/circumstances.

 

I didn't 'fail' to settle in Australia - in fact I did settle in Australia, there was a fairly long period of time when I expected to spend the rest of my life there and wasn't particularly unhappy about that - ultimately I had a poorer quality of life than in the UK so I chose to move back there - should that ever change then I would consider moving back.

 

I definitely do not see myself as having failed in anyway - expect perhaps failing to see how great my life was in the UK before we originally left.

 

BUT I do think there are people who's migration attempts do fail and it is sad for those people - there are those that return that from the outside it is easy to see that they are suffering from culture shock and those who probably should never of migrated in the first place. I do try to spot both types on here and advise them to hang on in there or if they haven't already moved advise them not to (but that usually results in my being labelled as an Oz hater bitter because of my own failures !!)

[flag of convenience]

Whilst I agree with your first comment I disagree with the second sentence - 'something from the heart' as I find this more often reveals a lot about the person and very little about how things really are at ground level.

 

Things I've seen written and have assimilated into some generic examples..

 

'The city is so expensive, it costs a bomb to do anything and there's traffic everywhere' - I didn't do research, otherwise I'd have expected the city, like many other cities to be expensive and decide to move there knowing this or choose elsewhere to live'

 

'I've found australians to be generally unfriendly' - I'm unhappy - help me validate my unhappiness and share this feeling by grouping a country of people together and label them all as if they were one person

 

I really love reading the posts where people are subjective, heart on the sleeve stuff, good or bad...whilst also being honest (objective)....these posts I find the most insightful.

 

It is but you obviously know to what I refer. I rather think both can be on display. Thus it may or may not display what is happening on the ground.

For example your generic examples.

Australian cities are darn expensive. Probably hard to get a handle on costs from pure research from abroad where negativity is more often overlooked with the reinforcement of positive information in order I expect to validate one's outbound decision.

Not forgetting we tend not to have other locations that are cheap close to cities, at least in the sense one may find in Europe. Here it would tend to be fringe suburbs. May or may not be suitable.

 

As for Australian's being unfriendly, or more to the point the difficulty in making friends here, well it would one of the most personally, heart felt experiences , continually aired on forums such as this and hardly without some foundation. There are national characteristics which some find hard to overcome and indeed do group it as a mass. I don't think unhappiness in itself usually causes a critique of the people but may well be founded or not, a cause of it.

[grizzly111]

I have a distinct failure to agree with how much tradies charge in Costralia! I'm not sure how much they charge in the UK but here it's insane. I just got a bill for a reputable company to fix my fridge. The charge was $90/hr for the tradesman to work on it and also a whopping $60/hr for his assistant to help him carry it to his ute. Yes...they charge his lackey out for $60/hr! PLUS there was a $40 call out charge!! Unbelievable.

And all in all they could not find the fault and just regassed it.

The other day I had a plumber come over to fix a tap (something I should have done myself) - very simple washer change in the end - and they charged $100/hr plus callout for $35 PLUS a fuel levy for $5.50 because fuel is so expensive they said!

 

I got a quote last year for an electrician to come to my business to change about 30 fluoro lights as the ceiling is too high for my ladder and it came to $900. So I calculated that labour was around $420/hr!!!! They also managed to put a 100% markup on the bulbs too vs Bunnings. I decided to borrow a taller ladder and do it myself.

 

Could this contribute to members failure to settle in Oz or are these just isolated cases of me being ripped off by tradesmen?

[bristolman]

I have a distinct failure to agree with how much tradies charge in Costralia! I'm not sure how much they charge in the UK but here it's insane. I just got a bill for a reputable company to fix my fridge. The charge was $90/hr for the tradesman to work on it and also a whopping $60/hr for his assistant to help him carry it to his ute. Yes...they charge his lackey out for $60/hr! PLUS there was a $40 call out charge!! Unbelievable.

And all in all they could not find the fault and just regassed it.

The other day I had a plumber come over to fix a tap (something I should have done myself) - very simple washer change in the end - and they charged $100/hr plus callout for $35 PLUS a fuel levy for $5.50 because fuel is so expensive they said!

 

Could this contribute to members failure to settle in Oz or are these just isolated cases of me being ripped off by tradesmen?

 

Sadly yes I have to agree, the term 'charge like a wounded bull' I am sure came about because of Aussie tradesmen.