HappyHeart Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Hmm, so often asked glibly - based on posts on here: money, mental health, physical health, marital relationship, family relationships, kids education, career prospects (could go on but it won't!) Exactly...we must all ask ourselves 'what do we stand to lose' and if we are happy with the answer..then go...some stand to lose more than others..some value what they have more than others...not a glib...just go what do you have to lose...more a 'what do YOU have to lose? Hard to put across on a forum I see....ourselves...decided we had nothing to lose...except pride and a few thousand $$$....if we'd had a sucessful business, brilliant house etc etc do you think we may have thought twice? I reckon! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyHeart Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Looks like you've answered your own question OP. Stay put...you can live with what ifs but the reality of losing all that 'stuff' might break you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
garyupnorth Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Hmm, so often asked glibly - based on posts on here: money, mental health, physical health, marital relationship, family relationships, kids education, career prospects (could go on but it won't!) The list is endless. Until you have done it, that little niggling voice in the back of you head will be saying "would have, could have, should have" and "what if I......" I've spoken to others who have approached me through PM, after I have posted something that has hit a nerve, I explained my concerns and my situation, but until it happens to them....it always seems to be happening to someone else. expect and prepare for the worst, then anything positive is a bonus. It's a big gamble some love it, some hate it, whilst the reason for you coming over is still valid then go for it, once the reason becomes null and void get out. We are getting out because our reasons for coming here are null and void, we are fortunate to be in a position that we can get back, there are others here who are stuck in a rut just like they were in the UK and their "Utopia bubble" has popped with an almighty bang and cannot get back to the UK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midwife2005 Posted November 16, 2013 Author Share Posted November 16, 2013 We first starting thinking about moving to Australia when we had our 2nd child in 2008. The recession had hit and we saw so many people around us struggling, losing their jobs. My husband is in the building trade so to say he was nervous was an understatement. He is a joiner by trade and so many of his friends lost their jobs. He has been a contrete supplier for over 10 years and luckily didn't have much debt so was able to tick over when many of his competition went under. His sister lives in New Zealand and my husband travelled in Oz on a WHV about 14 years ago. He loved it there and I had always thought that I would like to emigrate. So we talked about it and we decided to give it a go as things in this country seemed desperate at that point. As as I said earlier we loved Perth when we activated in January. We know a few people there who had made the move themselves from the UK so we were able to get a good insight into how things actually are there. Some things seem better in Oz, some seem better in the UK. We loved the lifestyle the fact that you can make plans, come home after a hard day and sit out all night, the parks, the free bbqs. My teenage son who had always been opposed to the idea of moving loved it and was so much more active there. He never bothered with TV, but maybe because it's awful ;-). We loved how everything is really clean, I loved the supermarkets just cos I love trying different foods in different countries but hated how the shopping malls are carbon copies of each other. Clothes shopping is dire!! Loved Dan Murphy's, thought I'd died and gone to wine heaven. The hospital I visited was really lovely and the working conditions seemed so much better than the UK. We looked into my husband setting up his concrete business while we were there. We spent hours on the phone, in Internet cafes, on the phone to immigration to see if it was feasible. We found that the trucks my husband has are only used in the mines in Oz due to weight restrictions on the roads, the only thing similar was something called Concrete Taxi so he did think there was a gap in the market. But we found it difficult to find out the cost of raw materials while we were there and his trucks would have to be significantly modified to run on Australian roads and obviously the cost of getting them over here, taxes etc. So a lot of unknowns and the big question could he become established and successful. Since we came home things seem to be on the up in the UK. My husband has been very busy work wise so much so that he's thinking of buying another truck. We know we're here for at least another 18 months as our teenage son started his GCSEs in September so we want him to finish and we always said we need to carry on as if we're staying just in case we do. We started saving as soon as we got back in January for when and if we do go so we're preparing for each eventuality. We still don't like where the UK is heading and I don't think that is going to change. As a family unit we are happy, but I honestly do believe that we would be there now if it wasn't for the business. It's easy to say money isn't everything and it isn't, it's the emotional impact that worries me more. Thanks for taking the time to reply to me x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 I think you are over-thinking it really. Either stay or go- whichever you decide put the other option right behind you and move forward. No one can tell you which to do but reading your posts I would say you have the Aussie itch- and the way forward is to scratch it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Being on holiday is very different from actually living a life in a place unfortunately from whichever side you are on. A lot of the things you do on holiday you think will happen when you live in a place actually never do - if you aren't active in UK you're likely to drift into the same inactivity in Australia, if you don't make good use of those fabulous long UK summer evenings you are unlikely to make use of the shorter Aussie evenings. You still have to clean the oven and put the garbage out no matter where you are and once you become settled,, wherever, the mundane takes over. If you are going to go then hanging around for GCSEs is irrelevant and you run the risk of missing the yr 11 boat which is fundamental for any further Aus prospects (yr 11 starts in the Feb when a kid is 16 or just about to turn 16). Otherwise wait until end of A Levels as they travel well to Aus for Uni entry. edited to say, also, I have no idea how old you are but over 40 you are running close to struggling to get enough in your retirement pot for a comfortable retirement eventually. Of course if you become a millionaire businessman then that's irrelevant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Agree with Quoll about the GCSE's - they're not going to count for anything here, and won't get Uni entry (A levels do). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Firmly in the "if it ain't broke" camp myself - my solution would be to stop watching H&A, Neighbors, WDU and Phil Who? And all the other soaps and look at what you have got! If circumstances change then go with the best option at the time. What ifs are a waste of time and energy - if you have something on the table that is better than you have now then try a belt and braces approach where possible to giving it a go otherwise, remember that Australia is just another first world country and if you live in one already there won't be that much difference on a day to day basis. I fully agree. I regret coming here immensely and wished I had pushed harder to move back to Canada, which I loved and which is so much more advanced than Perth. If we had had the life of the OP, we would not have come here and even though we did a preview visit, it has not worked for me the way I had hoped it would. We've not been here a year yet and I know it takes at least two years to settle, but I'm not enjoying it that much (and I was the one out of the two of us who had emigrated before). I disagree about there not being much difference on a day to day basis. You don't have lifelong friends you can call in the evenings, if you are sick and your husband is away there is nobody to help or to pop over and look after the kids to allow you to have a rest. It is very different on a day to day basis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docboat Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 By the very nature of the information given, the OP should definitely NOT come here. Only come to Australia if you have a good reason, a strong desire, a vision. And the strength to make it happen. Please save yourself the frustration and tears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest26012 Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 If you have an itch and no amount of scratching will get rid of it then come and take the chance! If you have a fab life where you are then stay where you are happy. It's a huge move in your 40s to come here. We did it and it worked for us but no kids in the equation, so very different for you? I would suggest a pro and con list, as have others, good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 I fully agree. I regret coming here immensely and wished I had pushed harder to move back to Canada, which I loved and which is so much more advanced than Perth. If we had had the life of the OP, we would not have come here and even though we did a preview visit, it has not worked for me the way I had hoped it would. We've not been here a year yet and I know it takes at least two years to settle, but I'm not enjoying it that much (and I was the one out of the two of us who had emigrated before). I disagree about there not being much difference on a day to day basis. You don't have lifelong friends you can call in the evenings, if you are sick and your husband is away there is nobody to help or to pop over and look after the kids to allow you to have a rest. It is very different on a day to day basis. So when you looked at a map of Ausralia what made you decide that moving to the opposite side of Australia from where the majority reside? Isolated and expensive for a start. Just asking? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 I fully agree. I regret coming here immensely and wished I had pushed harder to move back to Canada, which I loved and which is so much more advanced than Perth. If we had had the life of the OP, we would not have come here and even though we did a preview visit, it has not worked for me the way I had hoped it would. We've not been here a year yet and I know it takes at least two years to settle, but I'm not enjoying it that much (and I was the one out of the two of us who had emigrated before). I disagree about there not being much difference on a day to day basis. You don't have lifelong friends you can call in the evenings, if you are sick and your husband is away there is nobody to help or to pop over and look after the kids to allow you to have a rest. It is very different on a day to day basis. I just took the isolation for granted! Selfish and self sufficient are the hallmarks of a successful migrant I fear! I quite agree though, finding that special kind of friend who you can call at 3am is very much luck of the draw and I certainly never found one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 I just took the isolation for granted! Selfish and self sufficient are the hallmarks of a successful migrant I fear! I quite agree though, finding that special kind of friend who you can call at 3am is very much luck of the draw and I certainly never found one. No surprises there! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest km75 Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 Honestly, it's a damned if you do, damned if you don't. We're about to go to Sydney - my husband is Australian and we lived there from 2003-2008 and loved it - but we've been back almost six years and now I wonder what it will be like when we go back in January - however, it's an itch we need to scratch and if we don't go we won't know. That said, it's easy for us, we don't have a business here and we have family here and there, we're dual citizens so we can come and go. I always thought I wanted to settle in Australia, but over the past few weeks as we've been preparing to move, I have found myself thinking we are ok here financially, the kids are happy at school, we live in a nice part of the country etc and I am getting cold feet. I think cold feet are only natural. If you've got three years up your sleeve perhaps an extended trip back will hold some answers, I know a holiday is not the same as living there - could your husband continue his business from Australia if you went for three months or so?? Good luck with whatever you decide - the thing is the grass isn't greener, there is good and bad to every country - you just need to try and weigh up what works for you and your family xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petals Posted November 16, 2013 Share Posted November 16, 2013 No surprises there! What a cruel comment to make to someone you will probably never meet and know, I believe you can buy empathy in bottles these days, you may like it if you try it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 KM75 has a good idea there. Is there any way your husband could get someone to manage the business while you are in Australia, giving you the time to make a decision as to whether it is for you or not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 So when you looked at a map of Ausralia what made you decide that moving to the opposite side of Australia from where the majority reside? Isolated and expensive for a start. Just asking? It was down to my husband's work. I have been doing contracting for much of the last 10 years, to make it easier to move round the UK with him (he was moved regularly in the armed forces), so for me the location was not a big issue - although I would have had many more opportunities in Sydney or Melbourne. We took the view that if I could not get work it would be fine for me to stay at home and bring up the kids but we needed one reliable income. My husband's trade (Hydrographic Survey) is predominantly on the west coast which is why we came to this side of the country. If there had been as many jobs on the East Coast, we would probably have looked over on that side of the country. The isolation does not bother us much at this point in time. It may do as the kids grow older, but right now they want beaches and play parks, so Perth is fine for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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