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Gadgetboy

Only been here 3 months and want to go back to the UK

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your post sounds like many of mine... after just a few days in Oz it didnt feel right.. when our stuff arrived I had a bit of meltdown (not crazy meltdown but just really feeling sorry we came) all the memories from our old house etc etc. So everyone told me it was perfectly normal.. I threw myself into things.. but each day I just felt the same.. that oz just wasnt for me... I met lots of new friends all of which told me they had some bad days here and there but that was normal too... But everyday was like that for me... just didnt like it here at all. I missed my family (mainly my mam & nephew) I missed my mates.. even though we wouldnt live in each others pockets it was always the same every time we met up... just having craic... no pretence.... I missed Ireland... the buildings the weather the people. 3 months in and me and my hubbie sat down and talked... it was hard as we had to deal with what it took us to get here... but we said right if we want to go home we will just go home but lets see it out till xmas.... that made things easier... we were off every weekend touring the whole place and doing everything we could possibly do.. but all the time knowing it wasnt for me. We sold up everything back home (including our lovely family home) so going home would be basically starting all over again... we have lost quite alot of money coming here but I look at it like a 6 month working holiday... and I know if I didnt come here I would always thing the grass is greener. We are flying home on Wednesday to go live with my mam till my hubbie or myself get a job so we can get a small mortgage to buy a house. We made a good profit from the sale of our house back in Ireland so while it cost us alot making this move we are going home and are in a good position so I cant be too sad about things. We only lasted 6 months but in my case I just knew its not for me. Everyone says we didnt give it long enough but only time will tell. I know how you are feeling but my advice is to do what we did... think of it as a working holiday... try and pack in as much as you possibly can and keep yourself busy. Re-evaluate things every say 2 months... and go from there... but just remember you can always go home.. its not a prision sentence... and things are never as bad as you think they will be.

We didnt have finance on our cars, we bought them outright... and while we lost money selling them on it wasnt too bad. The resale on cars is good so Im sure you can pay the finance off. Regarding mobiles.. we signed up for a 2 year contract... when I booked our flights I contacted the phone company saying we were getting no coverage... i had a bit of battle but finally we get to hand our phones back and are out of the contract... you can contact the TIO and complain to them... just keep hassling them bout coverage... you will get out of it eventually. As for rental lease if you put ads up on the likes of gumtree you will be able to get someone to take on your lease.. I done this and got loads of replies and applications... was very easy.

Basically what I am trying to say is things are not as bad as you think. There are ways around things if you really want to come home. But please try and give it as long as you possibly can so you can come home and say you tried your best.

Facebook is great for meeting people. Im from Ireland and theres lots of irish mums groups.. brisbane meet ups on there.. you just need to put yourself out there and make friends... it does help alot. I know its hard with kids... my eldest was in school and I had two smallies with me then aswell. So that was hard. My eldest hates it here. I thought she would love it but she misses family and friends from home. Its funny cos she keeps going around wearing little ireland tshirts... her favourite colour is now green and I swear if she draws another Irish flag I will kill her hahah.

Best of luck... and try to enjoy it.. see the sights... and re-evaluate things every so often.

Will let you know how I get on at home!

Take care!


TRA passed 28/06/10, 176 family sponsored done myself online 15/02/11 , CO Oct, Meds & Police checks done and sent off 16 Oct, Visa Granted 19/10/11, Husband Carpenter/Joiner - Moving to Brisbane North on the 8th of Aug with 3 lovely kids (6, 3 & 1)

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We knew within the three month period that oz was not for us, lots of reasons and it wasn't that we hated it there either, we really loved it there, but it hit home that we loved/liked it enough only for a holiday! The kids were very unhappy and in such a short space of time they changed so much and not for the better! No regrets at all in returning so soon.


Oz is Beautiful, but the uk is home :wubclub:

Returned to Bournemouth 20th August 2010

 

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We knew very early on that we didn't like it too and my husband is an Aussie- we had lots of close family there and we met lots of people so for us it wasn't missing family and friends it was missing good old Blighty. We left after 8 months, it was hard having to start again but we have been back over 2 years and have no regrets whatsoever.

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your post sounds like many of mine... after just a few days in Oz it didnt feel right.. when our stuff arrived I had a bit of meltdown (...)

Take care!

Om my... Exactly how I feel! My girlfriend is very dissapointed (in me) as we may have been able to forsee this while we didn't make the move yet. I absolutely insisted on going as I wanted to know how it would be here, while my girlfriend was having more cold feet beforehand. I was confident we would succeed and I wouldn't miss friends and family too much. I guess I ignored my real emotions there...

 

In the airplane I cried for an hour about missing people already. And since we landed 2 months ago every day seems depressive. I got work after 2 weeks and we met one nice family that we are friends with. But I just miss home. My mom, sister, nephew. Hell, even my family in law (who would have thought haha).

 

We actually had a great life back home. Surely we hated the frikking bad weather 10 months a year (and without a doubt we will keep hating that). Even summer sucks. It's nice one day a week and you never know what day. So there is no possibility of planning, or you have to work. But we had great friends. We could both find work. We had family around us....

 

I have been discussing this with my girlfriend. She says I don't give OZ a real chance. That I already made up my mind. And I think she is right... Although I really want to give it a chance. But in my mind I already made up a planning; I will discuss our leaving in March and move back home in June. Somehow I have the feeling I want to stay here for at least 6 months. To avoid loss of face back home and I think tax wise it is smarter. I am fantasizing about how I will see friends again.

 

My girlfriend wants to stay or -if I decide I want to leave- she rather wants to leave now. So we can move forward with our lives again. We have been planning for three years to go to OZ and we stood still. We figured we could continue living again when we arrived over here, but because I am so depressed about it we stand still again. The constant fear of making the indefinite choice to leave and had back home. This constant fear is unbareble.

 

She is looking for work, but finds it really difficult as I want to leave soon. Why would she put so much effort in getting a job if she has to quit after 2 months? And what if she likes her job? My girlfriend really wants to give it a go as we worked towards this for 3 years and spend 30k euro's on it the past years. Half our savings is in this move and getting the visa.

 

I have the feeling I can't talk to her about it any more, because of a few reasons:

* We end up both in a depressive state. Why would I do that to her?

* I don't want to give her a feeling I am not trying... (which might be the case anyway)

* What's the point? Everything has been said already.

 

So it seems my planning will be to discuss it in March again that I want to leave in June. Start planning and spending money again on getting back. That thought gives me some peace of mind. But the downside is I don't give it a chance at all any more.

 

:(

 

Hi. I have recently emigrated, 3 months ago, but already have the gut feeling that I am not happy here and want to return to the uk. We wont be able to do it for a while as we have now used up all our savings so will have to save up but I just know I cant stay here forever. I miss my family and friends and just the familiarity of everything. What worries me is we already have things like car finance for the next 4 years, phone contract and rental lease, how do we return to the uk with those sorts of ties and how do we find somewhere to live and work in the uk again, do they do short term rentals like they do here? Im so worried that we will be stuck here now as it took us so long to get out here and now really wish we had never made the move.

 

This is just my opinion and im ready for the negative comments and being told to give it time, well I will be as we wont be able to plan anything soon so at least when it gets to the point to get the ball rolling I may of changed my mind but I really dont think I will.

 

 

I understand how you feel. And I feel the exact same, but I am glad we have the option of leaving. Take care!

Edited by FOL

Lived in Perth for 18 months. Pingponging back in Juli '15!

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I loved Perth the moment I left the airport I just knew it was "home" the weather, the rental, the suburb, it all felt right I knew that quickly! Of course I beleive the flip side of that us that some must feel that the place isn't for them just as quickly. I'm not sure what the answer is except to say follow your feelings only you can know what feels right. Many have tried it and many don't like it, you wouldn't be the first. Good luck.

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Hiya I'm so sorry you feel this way. You may find it gets better, try and enjoy the time you have here and think of it as an experience. England isn't going any where and if you still feel like this in the future you can go back. They do 6months rental lease in the UK as well.

as for the phones and your lease here hopefully there not to long and can save up some cash till then. I know some one who just returned the car they had on finance and just went back to the Uk.

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Hiya, I have been in Sydney for almost 9 months now and i still feel like I want to return to the UK. I came here with my eyes open, been many times before, but I just feel no connection. I miss almost everything about England from the football, to the proper pubs, real friends, the sense of humour, the proximity to Europe, and I could go on.

 

I moved primarily for a better climate, but soon realised that is hardly compensation for all the above. I thought as time went by I would feel better. I don't. I feel worse with each day. I am off for a holiday to England in June and am seriously considering returning next year if I still feel like this.

 

I have a full time job, friends and a social life here. Yet, in my heart, I don't feel i'm in the right place. All my family and friends are at home, and i am here. Well, for now at least :-)

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Are you able to save money whilst working here? If so, figure out how long it will take to pay off your car (we shortened our contract from 2 years to 1 year once we figured out how much we could pay off per month). Also figure out, on top of that, how long it will take to save enough to move home and be reasonably comfortable. Once you have a time frame in mind, add 6 months to a year to that.

 

So that might be 3 or 4 years, which sounds a lot, but it isn't in the grand scheme of things. See it as a short term commitment to Australia, and make intentions to enjoy it as much as you can and see this corner of the world before you go home. That's what we're doing, on our second stint in Oz and I knew before we even arrived this time that I didn't want to live here forever. We see it as a way of saving more than we could in the UK and travel around this area which is much more inaccessible from the UK. We're currently planning a 3 week holiday to New Zealand for April.

 

If you view your situation as temporary, and give yourself a time frame to work to, then you won't feel stuck. This mindset works very well for us. Yes we miss family and friends but it gives them all an opportunity to come and visit, and the UK will always be there when you do finally return. You'll feel like you've just completed an adventure and have lots of happy memories from your time here. Just focus, make some plans, and you'll be fine.

 

Here here !!

 

Couldnt be a better time to send money home :-)


Why don't you just build a bridge and Get Over Yourself !!

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I found the 3 month mark particularly hard, it got better, having said that we came home after 8. Maybe it was knowing we were coming home made it easier.

 

google buggy buddies. It's a group for people in perth with young kids, they always have things going on.

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hello there ,know how you are feeling felt the same myself several years ago when we first came to Australia homesick really does mean feeling sick, trapped,unhappy crying not enjoying meeting new people as you loved the family and friends and all the familiar faces you were used to in the UK, it does get better, just think of it as an adventure with the knowledge that after a few years you can return to the UK if you still feel the same,give it a fair go while you are here what part of the uk did you live ? we were in Manchester; now in the country with just over 10,000 residents, hours away from the city no public transport, trust me that takes a lot of getting used to

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I am moved by how lovely and helpful the folks on this forum are, kindness by strangers is a wonderful thing, and one of the real benefits of a group support network like this.

We are moving out to Perth in June , and I have always looked more into the downside of the move than the up and made myself read posts like yours so that i have realistic expectations,

I maybe over-think things, my husband is certain I do LOL, and this mindset can stop you from taking any chances in life, but safe options are not always better options.

As I have got older I think its the things we didnt try that have caused me more regrets, than the ones we did. I wished we had had the chance to move to Oz when our children were young like yours, they would have had a wonderful outdoor life as both were water mad, but got just 2 weeks a year on holiday in the sun.

Try to enjoy the time you are in Oz, and tell yourself that nothing ventured is nothing gained, if you do go back at least you gave it a go, be proud of yourself for what you have achieved. However....please consider this.

It is very hard with little ones,ANYWHERE, mine are all grown up and gone , but when I was at your stage in life we only moved a couple of hundred miles away within the UK from our families and I was incredibly home sick, and depressed.

I think now looking back that it was just a stage in my life when I need the extra support of the unconditional love that only family and old friends give, and that the feelings you are having would probaly be similiar if you had stayed in the UK but had to move away to find work, rather than a problem with Austrailia itself.

Life throws challenges at us, but I can tell you when you look back it will be with fondness at this period, even though at the moment you are sad. My exile years with two little ones were spent in rainy Cumbria, in a very insular village,where looking at knitting patterns in the village shop was a highlight of the day, so count your blessings! Lol . But seriously hang on in, I am sure it will work out for the best in the end.

Good Luck with whatever you decide. x

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