Sarahelle

Hello people. So after 8 long years, and finding ourselves stuck in the same old situation for much of that time, we're looking into attempting to return to the UK. I say 'attempting' because my husband is of course, Australian. So, with the likelihood of saving 65,000 pretty much non-existent, we've decided to make the bold decision for me to move back to the UK with our 1 year old (leaving our 5 year old with hubby), get work and for him to apply for a spouse visa with me being the sponsor. It's not ideal as my husband is the higher earner, but it's me or nothing since I'm the Brit :) It's going to be a long hard road and I wondered if anyone else out there has done the same? Thanks in advance for any responses. Sarah

I’m suffering extreme homesickness and want to go home to England lol. Home is where the heart is.

Do it. Two years is nothing and you may find you’ll regret it if you don’t. You can always go home.

I honestly don't think I could survive 32 years here. 7 is enough for me and we don't even know if we can get home yet. Ian, I'm so sorry you're in this position, it must be so hard for you. I have myself had moments when I have just thought I'm going to be here forever and I really really don't want to be. No one can possibly understand how it feels until in that situation.

Thanks Taff. Is you're wife British or Australian?

I think it's very unfair especially as this is a commonwealth country. I really feel trapped here to be honest.

Unfortunately we've never been in a position to buy a house. I'm stuffed really.

Thank you all for your replies lots to consider Anyway it may well be a pipe dream. Oz hubby's dad told us that he had a U.K. Born grandmother so we were going to go ancestry visa route, however we have discovered that this was a great grandparent which doesn't count. Really want to return but we're only left with the dreaded spouse visa unless by some miracle we can wangle a resident return visa as hubby previously had ILR but it lapsed. Extremely doubtful but going to seek help from a migration agent. I'd return myself and get a job but we have two small children plus the likelihood of me meeting the financial requirements is slim. ?

Thanks for the replies lovely people. Funnily, calling it home wasn't something I thought about when I wrote it, but no, despite being here for 7 years and having got married and having two children here, sadly, I still wouldn't call Australia home. There are too many reasons to go into but home is definitely where the heart is. Thanks for the info Verystormy. We've got a ballpark figure much higher than that so maybe it's doable on a bit less! Hadn't thought of the fact we'd need to sell stuff because we wouldn't be taking much furniture with us.

Hey all, So we have decided to try to move back home and I was wondering for those that have done it - how much would you say it cost and how much in savings did you take? We've got so much to do and consider but we're just trying to make a plan at the moment Thanks all Sarah

Hey, sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I'm in a very similar situation but I've been here 7 years at the end of this month. I just had my second little girl 13 weeks ago and have suffered depression since then. I'm on antidepressants now. It might have been triggered by the birth but I know I've been battling the fact that I'm so unhappy here for a long time now. I really feel quite desperate sometimes because I have a horrible feeling I'm going to be stuck here forever. My husband is Australian so it's almost impossible for us to go back home. I guess I'm at a bit more of an advantage because he would move to the uk with me (he lived there for 8 years and misses it too) he has no ancestry as his only link would be great grandparents. He is the high earner so it would be pointless me leaving my children to try and get a job there. I can't offer any advice really, just to let you know that I know exactly what you're going through. People sometimes dismiss homesickness but it's a very real and horrible thing. I want to go home so badly. I hope you can find some way to get back and I wish you all the best. X

Thanks for your reply. No unfortunately, he's been down that route before but I think his grandfather or great grandfather was from Kent. It's too far back to be considered anyway I think.

My partner lived in the UK for 8 years and was Indefinite Leave to Remain, we let it expire thinking we could just get a spouse visa. I kick myself every day that he didn't apply for citizenship. Now I am stuck in Oz forever it feels.

Oh Flake, I totally understand how you feel... I moved here with my Aus partner mostly under the impression it would only be for a couple of years, hah! We're now nearly 6 years in with no sign of returning to the UK. I am unhappy here, I miss everything about home, everything. To make it worse I haven't been able to visit home for over 5 years so I'm incredibly homesick. We don't really have much of a life here, our working days are 12 hours long and we don't get to go on holiday because we can never afford it. I was devastated to learn about the visa changes which now mean we have no hope of returning to live any time soon. We also have a little girl who's nearly 3. Anyway, just saying I know what you're going through. If you want to go home, try and make it happen. Life is too short to be unhappy. I turn 40 in a few months..I surely hope I'm not still here and unhappy when I'm 50. Good Luck xx

Happy for those who are happy here, not disputing that it's a beautiful country, but it will never be 'home' for me. Several reasons I can't go home, spouse being Oz is one of them. I need a plan, I cannot live here forever for my sanity, which is already hanging by a thread after 5 years here.

So happy for you. I remember what a difficult decision it was for you xx

I hear ya! I hate hate hate it too and I still don't think I'm acclimatised to it lol. Although I'm in Redcliffe and we have the lovely sea breeze which makes it every so slightly better, I do work in Brisbane. Luckily I can escape into aircon for most of the week. Only another 5 or so months of it to go x

Hey guys, thank you so much for all your responses and sorry it's taken me a while to get on here, you know what it's like with a 13 month old! When the moving to Oz thing originally came about, I was led to believe it would only be for a couple of years and it didn't occurr to me that it would take at least that long to get somewhere in a different country! It's been very difficult for us to get our heads above water here, especially with deciding to have a baby and now my DF has FINALLY been made permanent after contracting for 4 years, we have to build our savings up pretty much from scratch to make ourselves reasonably secure and then maybe have some sort of life. I kind of agree with you LR, I can see that us buying a house would bring us collateral but first we need the money. I can just see us being here for years before we can even think about moving back and life could be worse I guess so I will indeed have to put my big girl panties on and deal with it. I must say though, having our baby girl has just made me yearn for home so much more than I thought it would and I miss my friends, family and England every day and it's coming up to Christmas which is always tough. A trip back home is the best I can hope for right now and it's been so long since I've been back I couldn't pass it up. At least now DF has a good steady well paid job, we can begin to save and hopefully return one day. As wise Quoll said, if it's meant to happen it will happen, and who knows, maybe something will change the ridiculous immigration laws slightly for the better for us with non EU spouses. We live in hope. Sorry for this slightly rambly reply I really appreciate all your kind words. xxx

Has anyone made the move not because they wanted to leave Britain, but solely to be with their partner? I did, and was just wondering who else has. I anticipated that this would only be a short term plan, but here we are 4 years down the line and now it's very difficult for me to go home with an Oz partner (only UK ancestry are a great grandfather so no good there). We have made a life here, his family are here and we have our precious little girl but I still always thought we'd go back to Britain at some point. Now my DF is talking about us buying a house which I suppose we should but thinking about doing that just makes me feel even more trapped here. I've tried so hard to be happy but I still think about home all the time and the life we had there. We're finally planning to go home for a visit next Christmas after what will be 4 and a half years by then and I've got this horrible feeling that I'm going to have to be forced on the plane to come back here to Oz. Please understand I do not dislike Australia and am not bashing it at all, it's just not where I want to be. S xx

Stop! You're making me yearn! I'm planning a visit back to home for next December so the saving has begun. We want to do so much including trips to New York & Scotland while where there so need to save loads. If we don't make it anywhere else I'll be more than happy to just be home It'll be my first time back in ages and by then it'll have been 4 and a half years since I've been home and I'm so excited already, I can't wait to have a Christmas in Wiltshire with my family! xxx

It's way more complicated than the Oz Defacto visa I applied for sadly, sooo much red tape. I'll be following with interest as I want to go home too and have an aussie spouse with no recent UK ancestry. Good luck with it all and do let us know how you get on

Soo jealous 3FC! But glad everything is so far so good It's my 4 year anniversary of being here on 2nd Sept and I don't think my homesickness is going to ever go away. Haven't been home for 3 1/2 years but hoping to get back middle of next year for a visit - I'm already chomping on the bit and haven't even saved the money yet. It will happen! Another un-Christmas looms (

I had my baby here almost exactly a year ago and I had my care through the midwives only. Even though I didn't have the same one every time, they were all so lovely and professional. I only had to pay for one scan and one other one through choice because I wanted a 3D scan for my 20 week one. The only problem I had was that because I was 11 days overdue, they didn't have any birthing rooms available so I had to do my entire labour on a ward which wasn't that pleasant but apart from that it was all really good. I'm in Redcliffe Qld btw

I know that for many people, moving here hs worked out very well for them and they have been very happy here for many years and don't miss the UK a jot. It hasn't worked out so well for us, our life is fine but it's nothing to write home about. We work longer hours - our average work day from start to finish is 12 hours which to me seems ridiculous. I only get 20 days holiday and while I do get paid more, the cost of living is higher. I'm just about to return to work after my maternity leave and I must say, living on one salary in Qld has been difficult and I'd say my partner earns a fairly decent amount. I don't think it's a bad thing to sit on it for a while until you're completely sure you can do it. It still kind of boggles my mind that people are so willing to give up a nice life with friends and family and move all the way around the world just for warmer weather. Personally, I hate the Qld summer although the winters are nice - much like a Brit summer I suppose. Everyone's experience is different and if you really want to do it, do it - life is too short for regrets, just make sure that you leave your options open if you want to return. Good luck with your decision! x

Bless you, I feel for you so much. I've only been here for 4 years but I understand what you're going through. If I may ask, why didn't it work out for you back in 2009? I try not to think about it too much but it does upset me a lot to think that it's almost impossible to return to my home land and it all seems worse now that we have a baby. I feel very guilty keeping their first and only grandchild away from my parents. I honestly don't know how I would even begin to plan a return home, so for now I'm just having to suck it up and get on with things. I'm sure you feel the same the same in thinking that it never even crossed my mind we wouldn't be able to go home and I know it's petty but I'm so jealous couples who are both British who decide to move home. My partner actually had IRL to remain in Britain and could have applied for citizenship, but we've burnt our bridges there. I hope things somehow get better for you. Please feel free to PM me if you'd like oxo