Have we done the right thing coming here?

[rikyuu]

It's a strange thing asking people you don't know for opinions and advice on some forum! But as I've just come to Oz, I don’t know anyone well enough to ask, so anonymous opinions are the next best thing!!

 

I moved to Melbourne in October with my wife and 2 young children hoping for a better life for all of us, but expected it to be hard work to get started and financially costly. Well the honeymoon period has ended and I’m starting to wonder if it was the right move, as I’m sure many others have. We’ve given up a lot to be here, but my wife and I are in very different situations, so she loves it, whilst I have my doubts. We used to seriously dislike the UK and Oz was our dream, but typically one forgets exactly why I didn’t like the UK and why I thought Oz would be so great!!

 

Basically, I got a job soon after getting here, so I just work, try to recover at the weekends and then go back to work. My wife looks after our 2 young children, which is hard work, but enjoyable. She meets lots of other mothers at kindy, various playgroups, trips to the zoo, dinners and endless birthday parties for the other kids. There’s so much to do, she loves it. She’s sad she gave up a good teaching job in the UK, but the alternative of looking after the kids and meeting lots of other mothers can be quite pleasant.

 

Here’s a comparison of my life UK vs Oz;

 

Firstly the negatives and this is going to sound like a rant, but it’s just the facts of how I feel:

 

Had a house in the UK and although we were thinking of moving, we could have afforded another one as cheaper houses are more available in the UK than Oz and I wouldn’t have blown 25,000 GBP coming to Oz. I can’t imagine being able to afford an Oz house unless they crash 50% and the pound comes back up to $2+ again.

 

I had a comfortable job in the UK, fairly secure permanent position, reasonable pay, not stressful. Biggest plus was a final salary pension, meaning we would have been very comfortable at retirement. In Oz, I have a short term contract job, that I have to hope is renewed each year. It’s a small company that screws the employees for everything, it’s unstable, not many holidays, longer hours, there’s been no pay rises for years and it’s low pay considering it’s contract work. It’s high pressure/stress and I’m forced to pay into a pension fund which is effectively some people gambling my money on the stock market, so I’ve lost 10% of my pension in the first 8 months. I’m 27 years from retirement, but at this rate I don’t know how I will manage with a small pension and no house!

 

My journey to work in the UK consisted of a 10min drive or walk. In Oz, it’s 30min to 2 hours of hell every morning and evening and I’m constantly fearing for my life due to the appalling driving on the roads. (I've had 1 crash and several near misses in 8 months of being here, but no crashes in 20 years of driving in the UK).

 

Although we lived some distance from my mother, Gran and sister, we saw them quite regularly and they could see the kids and were there for backup in emergencies. My mother and sister will now see us/kids about once every 2 years and my Gran may never see them again (she it quite old now). We are also totally by ourselves, with no family back up in emergencies.

 

In the UK I loved astronomy, it was my way of getting away from it all. Although I thought it was often cloudy in the UK, Melbourne really takes the micky with clouds. When it is finally clear, it’s either too windy or a full moon or I’m so exhausted from work/traffic that I can’t do it. I must use my astronomy kit about once every 2 months.

 

In the UK I could buy a decent second hand car with low km for little money, here we’ve had to buy old cars with mega k’s for the same price.

 

I thought the driving in the UK was bad, but Melbourne again takes the micky. What do you expect when every teenager upon passing their tests jumps into a 2 ton killing machine with a 4litre engine, then a few years later moves up to a 4l turbo or 6l V8. Every day there’s been another mother/father/family killed by a teen in a Falcon or Commodore. The last one in the news, the Commodore drive actually left the ground, he was going so fast across a junction and slammed into a Toyota, instantly killing the young mother who was driving. It makes me really worried when my wife and 2 young children are driving around all day, one other these idiots could kill them instantly. Fatalities are 3 times the rate of the UK, yet nothing is done that really tackles it apart from speed cameras.

 

In the UK, we were always concerned about burglary and spoke to lots of people who had been burgled. It turns out where we live in Melbourne (despite apparently being ok) has double the burglary rate of Coventry in the UK! And so many people have guns here too, it’s scary. We don’t know anyone here who has been burgled, but then we don’t know anyone in the area!

 

We rented for a long time in the UK and also lived in our own home for 8 years. In all the time we rented, we never had our rental cancelled. In our rental in Oz, we have been told that when our initial 12 months is up, the landlord (an investment business) no longer wants to rent it out (no reason given), so now we have to move out. The annoying thing is, we can’t move out before the contact end date, so even though we have 3 months notice, we can’t move out until the end date and not after it either, so we can’t realistically look until 1 month before the end date. Then we have to go through the stupid process of applying for lots of properties along with many other people and wait to see if we have been chosen, rather than first come first served.

 

I’m not going into the Aussie brainwashing that you have to pay the maximum price for everything and it has to be made in Australia to suit the Australian conditions that are the harshest in the world, but strangely none of this stuff is sold to other counties. Mainly because the quality is actually poor and it’s overpriced. And the many many adverts telling you that you must buy insurance for everything (especially health insurance) otherwise you are screwed.

 

I didn’t have many close friends in the UK due to moving around a lot, but here the only people I know are at work. I try to get to know the husbands of the friends my wife has made, but only seeing them once a month or so makes it difficult and I’m often tired from work/traffic/worrying about my families future!

 

We have a (relatively cheap) apartment in Turkey which we put in a lot of effort to buy and furnish and often visited. It's rented out now, which just covers the running costs (touch wood), but we'll not be able to visit for a long time and god only knows how we could ever go about selling it from such a distance.

 

You can’t get kebab meat and chips anywhere (from the same place)! (Could be a positive thinking about my waist line)!

 

And now the positives

 

My wife and kids love it here, they are out every day doing stuff and meeting lots of people and made lots of friends. (Although my wife is also worried about the idiots on the roads and the amount of time she has to spend on the roads).

 

We can go to the beach in the summer.

 

The rental properties are much larger than what you would get in the UK for the same price.

 

There is stunning natural country side (same as UK?), if only I could afford a 4x4 (extortionate) to explore the tracks as well as my daily car.

 

LPG is cheap, so I can run my V8 car very cheaply.

 

Conclusion

Obviously here, my wife’s and kid’s happiness is the most important, so I do my daily slog to/from work for that. But all that we gave up, especially the stability and family does concern me. Maybe I’m over reacting now that reality is sinking in. I’m sure there are more positives, but I’m struggling to think of them, where-as the negatives just came quick and fast!

Clearly my wife is in a different situation to me with her daily social life vs my work schedule. Also, my wife had no family in the UK, so no ties there, apart from some friends she had made recently and she hated the UK, she would never want to go back. I don’t want to belittle what she has given up, but I real feel for my family who have “lost” their 2 young kids.

I don’t want to go back to the UK either, mainly because I’ve probably forgotten why I disliked it in the first place and that was when the economy was good! Saying that, when we first started to try for an Australian visa, houses were cheap here, exchange rate was $2.5/pound. We were hoping to sell up and have a tiny mortgage in Oz. When we finally got our visa years later, within weeks the GFC hit and the pound and UK house prices plummeted, after Oz house prices had doubled. So the timing was bad.

 

So just my thoughts and feelings at the moment. Any constructive comments welcome!

 

ps. please don't put me down as another moaning Pom!!

[MARYROSE02]

My first reaction, after glancing at your rant was 'Go back, do not collect 200 quid, just go' but then I read to the end and see

 

'I don’t want to go back to the UK either'

 

There's your answer - your wife is happy here, your kids are happy here and you don't want to go back either?' It seems to me all you need is a job closer to home.

 

There are plenty of people who would agree that not being able to find a kebab would be an excellent reason on its own to go back!

 

Can't understand why you can't get one in Melbourne though, unless all the Turks and Lebs are here in Sydney. There are eight Lebanese places within 100 yds of my door, then a bit further up the road, past the Mosque, just as many Turkish.

 

PS I think it's a bit hypocritical condemning the young Aussies for wanting big cars when you are running a V8 yourself!

[Petals]

I hear you and agree that its not easy to get into a home here. It never has been. However there are many smaller older homes in some areas that are on a decent size plot of land instead of the tiny blocks they have these days and I guess your wife will want to return to teaching at some stage. When that happens you will be in a much better financial situation.

 

You sound as though you hate your job, if you do can you not look around for a new job with better conditions?

 

I grew up without my grandparents, aunts, uncles all that stuff due to the fact I lived with Mr and Mrs Wunderlust. However I survived and I love Australia and even though I returned to the UK when we were married for a while I could not live there again.

 

Yes, its dangerous on the roads but life is dangerous full stop. A guy was killed yesterday near where I live. Its not just the driving its the road conditions too they are pretty dire.

 

As for driving in the bush we do not have a four wheel drive and will never have one and we travel all over Victoria on dirt roads in our car and its fine. The only places we cannot go are up the fire tracks but then again I am not partial to those anyway.

 

Ever thought of swapping roles for a while with the oh. She works and you play.

 

Hope you feel better soon, and its hard with no friends for some, not my oh he has none by choice lol.

[rikyuu]

thanks for your comments so far.

 

Yep, definitely don't want to go back to the UK, but just finding all the insecurity hard to deal with at the moment. We're (I'm) not looking at going back as an option.

 

Kebabs are easy to come by (in fact there's a great Turkish place (too) near to work), but it's specifically kebab meat and chips I'm interested in!! LOL

 

The company I work for is great experience, I would prefer to stay for that, but it's the lack of security that worries me. It's hard to plan for the future. I'm pushing for a permanent position, or at least a longer contract, but won't find out for a couple of weeks.

 

We could move closer, but my wife has settled in the current area and chosen a school for the kids, I would prefer they have a short easy journey rather than me. It's also hard to find a job closer in my specific role that I'm experienced/qualified in.

 

LOL, yes I did think about my comment of owning a V8 myself! I'm hoping 20 years driving experience (with no crashes apart from when I came here, which was to avoid someone else coming down the middle of the road), counts for something compared to someone who's just passed their test and is out to impress their mates.

 

Regarding swapping roles, my wife did teach at Uni in the UK, but in Oz, you seem to need a Masters in your chose subject to get a decent teaching job at Uni. Besides, although I glamorized looking after the kids somewhat against my working role, it's still hard work, but more enjoyable and rewarding. Also, most 'children' networks mainly include women rather than blokes.......on second thoughts...not that bad after all LOL!

[RockDr]

Sounds like life isn't all the paradise you were anticipating. I guess you've got two choices: 1) cut your losses and go back home, or 2) stick it out another couple of years, trying to improve all the issues you've listed.

 

For example, it sounds to me like your main issue is the lack of time you have to spend with your family. Might be worth when you look for new rentals to be looking closer to work (yes, it might mean somewhere smaller) or close to a train station (if your work is also close enough to a train station at the other end) so you wouldn't have to be driving so much.

 

If your job is so unpleasant, start looking for something else.

 

It's not for nothing that international retail companies call Australia "Treasure Island". However Australia does seem to be waking up to the fact that they're over-paying for things, hopefully this means there might be a gradual change on the horizon.

 

How about swapping your daily car for a small 4x4? My partner and I have a suzuki Jimny as our only car. It's great around town, and also gets us wherever we want to go in the countryside. With two kids you might want something a bit bigger like a Rav4, but you certainly don't need a large expensive 4x4. (for example looking at Toyotas, quick search on drive.com.au shows new corolla hatchback at $30k, Rav4 at $40k and landcruiser at $65k+. Second hand you'd be able to get a Rav4 for under $15k).

 

Try joinging a club of some sort. You say you're interested in astronomy? maybe there's a group of people who meet once a week. Or is there another hobby you're interested in taking up? http://www.cae.edu.au runs a bunch of courses for adults in Melbourne. Get out there and meet people. One evening a week for a few weeks isn't going to take up all your spare time, but it might help you feel more settled and like you have a life outside of work.

[Paul1Perth]

I sense there is a bit of jealousy here. Your wife gets to stay at home, gets out with friends, probably meets them for coffee somewhere nice after dropping the kids at school. You, in the meantime are in the same rut you were in the UK, with what sounds like a longer commute and longer working hours.

 

It can be tough but force yourself to get out and about at weekends. Join an astronomy club or something and make the time to go. I think you just need to get a hobby to take your mind off your woes and start enjoying the weekends.

 

If you enjoyes sport of any kind you would be quids in. There is just about every sporting interest catered for and a lot better weather to enjoy them. Admittedly Perth is a lot different to Melbourne.

 

Good luck.

[RockDr]

With regards to cars. You can always hire a 4WD for the odd weekend or week away, certainly much cheaper than buying and maintaining one year-round.

[theonetruechris]

Only time will tell.

Personally I had a shocking reaction to coming here. probably due in part to having 'given up' a secure civil service post (even in my twenties the security & pension was the motivator for staying with them). then I had 6 months out of work. Got a job and things started to get better.

I don't know where you were in Blighty but i think we have much clearer skies with less light pollution - and I was used to rural Lincolnshire.

Give it a bit of time you'll mellow to some of the faults, find ways around others - but as far as the roads are concerned i'm afraid thats as good as it gets (until you become a menace to others :biggrin:)

[Guest stormgal]

The job and the driving parts are scary... I would think that the majority of the people in melbourne would use public transportation. Either way, I hope you get the longer contract or a permanent job

[rikyuu]

I sense there is a bit of jealousy here. Your wife gets to stay at home, gets out with friends, probably meets them for coffee somewhere nice after dropping the kids at school. You, in the meantime are in the same rut you were in the UK, with what sounds like a longer commute and longer working hours.

 

It can be tough but force yourself to get out and about at weekends. Join an astronomy club or something and make the time to go. I think you just need to get a hobby to take your mind off your woes and start enjoying the weekends.

 

If you enjoyes sport of any kind you would be quids in. There is just about every sporting interest catered for and a lot better weather to enjoy them. Admittedly Perth is a lot different to Melbourne.

 

Good luck.

 

Thanks,

 

yes, I feel not much has changed for me personally, work is work and it's tougher here.

 

We do try to do nice stuff together at the weekend. I'm often tired on Saturday though, which leaves Sunday and I've often got other stuff to do which I can't do during the week.

[Guest siamsusie]

Have you thought about changing states at all, or is it important to remain in Melbourne?

 

WA (out of the cities ) for example have the most amazing skies, some of the best I have seen.

My husband loves his astronomy and here is Tasmania he has not been disappointed. No light pollution!

 

You can choose your Super Fund can you not, I know we can.

 

I have seen some very interesting driving on both sides of the pond, resulting in the most horrendous of accidents.. foreign vehicles on the roads in Europe have also contributed to this .

The procedure of going through the driving test is more rigorous here , but kids are kids the world over and I do understand your concerns.

 

No, I do not understand the "gun culture" at all.

 

At the end of the day I would have thought a happy breadwinner would lead to a happy family, and to discuss this with your wife would be my first priority.

 

I hope you do manage to solve some of these issues, I have known some members to have held similar views to yourself when they first arrived but they have now happily settled.

 

Susie

[Guest JK2510]

We have a Mitsubishi outlander. I travel from house to house as a community care assistant so I do around 500-600 km per week. Full tank for a 2.4 engine= $70ish(depends whether I have a docket)

[Petals]

I believe you have not said where you are in Melbourne, or maybe I missed that. Can you and your wife get to one of the meet ups that are on, perhaps get a baby sitter and have a night out with other Brits, good to get things off your chest.

 

Also coming on here and having a moan is good for the sole.

 

I could moan today raining again I am sick of this winter and cannot wait for spring.

 

Good luck with being made permanent in your job.

[RockDr]

With the super fund you should also be able to choose the level of risk you want for your investment.

[rikyuu]

Thanks again all.

 

We did consider Perth, but I work in Automotive engineering, so Melbourne seemed the best place. But for the weather, I think Perth is unbeatable.

 

I've tried moving funds around a bit in my super, 70% Australia bonds then moved it back to shares as they may go up again. But it's still a gamble. I would get more putting into a 6% savings account and there's no risk. I'm not used to this concept of gambling your pension, but expect it's similar in the UK now.

 

I did have a Nissan PAtrol 4x4 and I love proper off roading and there's plenty of places to do it around Vic. But unfortunately, I crashed it into some water when I was trying to avoid this plonker coming down the middle of the road and killed the engine. It wasn't ideal for my commute either, so went with a Falcon instead. Old 4x4's are still megabucks here though and you really need to go off-roading as a group because some places are remote, which then really limits how many times you can go. Certainly can't justify one whilst my job is not secure.

 

ps. I'm in Melbourne west.

[DannyCoyles]

From reading everything you have said I think it’s the insecurity that’s causing the most problems. I can relate to your situation to an extent. I have my family here so we have more of a support system than most people that make the move. But we went through a long period where finances were up in the air and that’s with both of us working, but we did want to get a house quickly and prepared ourselves for 5 years of everything going into the house. It has hampered our ability to do some other things but we are 3 years into our 5 year plan and we are only 30 so got lots of time to do other things, we hope!

 

My only regret is that my wife has to work, we have 2 young boys, 4 and 7 months. I want for her the life your wife has, out meeting other mothers and having more time with the kids. But 2 more years and she can do that. As far as travelling to work I swapped my 10 minute drive in Northern Ireland for a 1.5 hour drive and hated it, moved jobs and got one about 1 hour drive and now I only work about 25 mins away and it makes a big difference.

 

So I know what it’s like having finances on your mind with a long drive to and from work with the longer working day. I feel the same just get time at the weekend to recover and then back to it and think what’s the point of this, I have found the same with friends, you only see them every now and again when the planets align! I have got to know quite a few people in 3 years but don’t see them enough to really get to know them. I think it’s the distance between everywhere, how little free time there is and how tired everyone is if they work all week. But it would be nice to have a better social life, not wanting to go out drinking with the boys like we did when we had no worries! (But they were good days) just a break from the norm, that is one thing that is still missing from our lives. All this has an impact on your life, sometimes you feel like you are just plodding along day by day.

 

After 3 years I just try to be proactive and make the most of each day, when all is said and done I know we are better off staying here. The bad days are just as bad here as N.I but the good days are a thousand times better. We very much live for now and have ideas about the future, something to aim for but not dwell on. Life back in N.I will never be the same as when we left so there is no point comparing our lives before and now.

 

As far as advice goes the only thing I can say is there are things you just have to accept like the drivers in Melbourne and that the social life is not the same as the UK. It takes people longer to accept you. Remember you are not the only person going through this. Look at the amount of people on here looking to meet other people for the exact same reasons. Also you have a typical male approach, the wife and kids are happy so just go with it. Sometimes you have to think of yourself first or it will start to impact on your family.

 

Good luck…

[rikyuu]

thanks Danny, so much of what you said relates to the way I feel at the moment. You've done well to get on the housing ladder here at your age, but expect there were a few sacrifices as you say.

 

It's tough having no family support for us. In the UK we just managed, my wife taught 2 days a week and Kindy was next to my work. But when the kids were ill (they often had colds/upset tummies) and kindy kicked them out, one of us had to come out of work immediately, which was usually me. If they were sick for a few days, we could get my mother to travel down to us. But here, if we were both working and the kids were ill then we'd be stuck, so only I can work.

 

I know things will change and I will keep at it, I'm not a quitter. Just at the moment it's difficult to see the reason for the big change.

[Guest The Pom Queen]

I'm sorry to hear that you are unhappy, believe me it is more normal than what you think, although it is usually the wife who is unhappy as they are the ones stuck at home. Can I ask, do you like your job? Sometimes when we are in an unhappy job we can feel really down with ourselves. I see so many people hit the 6 month depression at this time a lot of families are 50/50 whether they should return, many decide to stick it out and then all of a sudden something changes and they say they would never go back to the UK.

It may be good for you to meet up with some guys and get out for a few beers. Geoff is in the West and so is Harpodom both are great guys and I am sure would take you out for a few beers.

To be honest I never really felt settled in Melbourne although we were there for 7 years, now we have moved to Cairns and I want to grow old and die here, I love the place.

Lots of hugs

Kate

[DannyCoyles]

thanks Danny, so much of what you said relates to the way I feel at the moment. You've done well to get on the housing ladder here at your age, but expect there were a few sacrifices as you say.

 

It's tough having no family support for us. In the UK we just managed, my wife taught 2 days a week and Kindy was next to my work. But when the kids were ill (they often had colds/upset tummies) and kindy kicked them out, one of us had to come out of work immediately, which was usually me. If they were sick for a few days, we could get my mother to travel down to us. But here, if we were both working and the kids were ill then we'd be stuck, so only I can work.

 

I know things will change and I will keep at it, I'm not a quitter. Just at the moment it's difficult to see the reason for the big change.

 

Although we have the family here for those times when kids are sick they are all at work too. So normally i take time off. My wife is in a contract position, was supposed to be for 6 months thats why she took it but she is still there 3 years later. She is off today with our oldest as he is sick, I was off with him on Friday. So thats our money down for this week and she feels bad and will probably work extra for the rest of the week to make up the hours.

 

Getting the house was a nightmare, under vauled by $50k just before settlement (more cash needed) then as soon as it was finished it was valued at $40k over what we paid. $90k differnece in 2 months. Plus other things that the bank put is through and I was employed by the bank at the time! It nearly put is over the edge a number of times.

 

We are not completly there yet but it better be worth it in the long run. My in-laws were over at the start of this year and they loved the place so much so that they were really down when they went back home, really snappy with the rest of the family and just wanted to come back. They found no reason for us to return and are planning on spending a lot of time here when they retire.

 

Its 18 months until our son starts school and we can cope with my wife at work for the first year with some unpaid leave and shorter working days, but with the school holidays here and lack of people to look after him even before and after school there is no way we could do it long term. All you can do is give it you best and see what happens.

[rikyuu]

I'm sorry to hear that you are unhappy, believe me it is more normal than what you think, although it is usually the wife who is unhappy as they are the ones stuck at home. Can I ask, do you like your job? Sometimes when we are in an unhappy job we can feel really down with ourselves. I see so many people hit the 6 month depression at this time a lot of families are 50/50 whether they should return, many decide to stick it out and then all of a sudden something changes and they say they would never go back to the UK.

It may be good for you to meet up with some guys and get out for a few beers. Geoff is in the West and so is Harpodom both are great guys and I am sure would take you out for a few beers.

To be honest I never really felt settled in Melbourne although we were there for 7 years, now we have moved to Cairns and I want to grow old and die here, I love the place.

Lots of hugs

Kate

 

Thanks Kate, there's never a dull moment in my job! It's good experience and the guys in the small team I work directly with are great. As it's a small company though, they're always looking at reducing costs, so have a bit of a hire and fire policy, getting rid of people when there's a gap in the work. It's crazy though as so much experience is lost and damages future products. So it's the lack of being part of the company and the insecurity that's the most annoying. But I guess I'm not alone in that respect, sure many people feel the same.

[rikyuu]

The job and the driving parts are scary... I would think that the majority of the people in melbourne would use public transportation. Either way, I hope you get the longer contract or a permanent job

 

it's nuts. This morning I was waiting to turn right, my filter arrow went green, I was just about to set off and someone coming in the opposite direction (in a Falcon V8 no less) beeps at the guy in front who is stopped at a red light, swerves around him and goes straight through the red light at about 100kph. If I'd set off earlier, I'd be a gonner.

 

I told my mate at work and he said the same thing happened on Friday. He was waiting to turn right, his light went green and this car came screaming across the junction through the red light. He had to stop to avoid being hit and killed.

 

Then there's been 2 people killed this weekend on pedestrian crossings by cars going through on red. One guy was hit by 2 cars!

 

It's nuts, what is wrong with these people? This country has the lowest most enforced speed limits of anywhere I know, so many random booze and drugs stops and plain cop cars everywhere, but it makes no difference.

 

I was trying to work out what it is and I think it's a combination of;

1) young inexperienced drivers in large, heavy, fast cars with rear wheel drive (easy to lose control) (vs 1.3l fiesta in the UK)

2) large, heavy, fast cars are the cheapest to buy

3) they don't need insurance (the rego covers them enough to drive, but covers no-one else) (vs minimum TPFT in the UK which is still costly)

4) cars are not checked yearly for road worthy, so lots of cars out there with no brakes, bald tyres, badly adjusted headlights

5) culture of the fastest, most powerful cars are best.

6) it's normal to have crashed 3 times by the age of 24 (judging by my colleagues)

7) very long, straight, wide roads so you can see the next lights and try to get through them at all costs, ignoring any pedestrian crossings in the way

8) lights that are on red for a very long time, so you must get through them

[fleabo]

Rikyuu, I can relate to much of what you say in your OP. I regularly go through a similar mental exercise (or exorcise, not sure which!)

 

My only advice would be to think about small changes to your life that might improve matters for you on a day/day or week/week basis.

 

And think about the big picture - it sounds like 3 out of 4 of you are happy and contented. It is not a bad start. And things will get easier as your kids grow up.

 

Good luck.

[newjez]

Hi Rikyuu, having read your post, I can see that there are things that have changed, (ie UK pension) which you will never get back. Just let these go. It's pointless dwelling on what you can't fix.

 

There are things you can change which will make you're life better. ie you're job situation. Concentrate on these.

 

There are things which probably can't change - but you may be able to try. This may not achieve anything, but it may make you feel better. You could start campaigns for road safety. Small stuff, but writing letters can help. Badger your mp and local police. If there is a bad junction, you could open a facebook page on it and get a petition to get a camera put on it.

 

In short - try to work out the easiest way to make your life better, with the least amount of hassle, and do it.

[Lee Wilby]

Hi Rikyuu,

I have sent you a private message.

Lee

[MARYROSE02]

I certainly don't go thru red lights in Sydney, not after a $344 fine and 3 points off my licence at the corner of Clevo & South Dowling. I avoid that intersection at all costs now.