Guest Gabby Posted June 14, 2009 Share Posted June 14, 2009 I can honestly say that we have never encountered such a problem in all our years over here.We made it a rule to be friendly with folks at work and never to say --o' in England we had this or that ( otherwise they would say 'why did you leave then ) we said we had made the move for the kids sake to be in a totally different environment,space etc etc this seemed to work well for us . I find that if you say Hi and smile ,how's your day going kind of thing you will always get a response in like manner -- I never wanted to be in the 'winging pom section ' and there are a lot around .Hope you find what you are looking for when you return to UK but I bet you regret the move and come back . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bod Posted June 15, 2009 Share Posted June 15, 2009 I can honestly say that we have never encountered such a problem in all our years over here.We made it a rule to be friendly with folks at work and never to say --o' in England we had this or that ( otherwise they would say 'why did you leave then ) we said we had made the move for the kids sake to be in a totally different environment,space etc etc this seemed to work well for us . I find that if you say Hi and smile ,how's your day going kind of thing you will always get a response in like manner -- I never wanted to be in the 'winging pom section ' and there are a lot around .Hope you find what you are looking for when you return to UK but I bet you regret the move and come back . Why would she regret it and go back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joetrac Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 I can honestly say that we have never encountered such a problem in all our years over here.We made it a rule to be friendly with folks at work and never to say --o' in England we had this or that ( otherwise they would say 'why did you leave then ) we said we had made the move for the kids sake to be in a totally different environment,space etc etc this seemed to work well for us . I find that if you say Hi and smile ,how's your day going kind of thing you will always get a response in like manner -- I never wanted to be in the 'winging pom section ' and there are a lot around .Hope you find what you are looking for when you return to UK but I bet you regret the move and come back . As these people were ment to be her friends Im sure she was friendly to them. Not everyone regrets returning to the Uk...after 2 years in Brisbane ..and being back for 6 months I can say its the best thing we ever did as a family. I dont think I have ever seen my daughter happier with her family close by. We also have kids running in and out of the back garden every day ...something that never happened in Oz. Both me and my hubby got jobs in building trade and Finance...so I know we are lucky...but if you can get a job its a really good time to return.House prices are cheaper,more pounds for your dollars,Mortgage rates are very low. The most important thing is for people to be happy and being back in scotland has made that possible for my wee family. No regrets here !!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gabby Posted June 17, 2009 Share Posted June 17, 2009 Glad you are happy back in Scotland .I spent first 15 years of my life there --Lanarkshire to be exact and still have a brother in Coatbridge. I doubt those stupid women were ever real friends and not to judge other Aussies by . We are all settled here and this is our home .I just booked a flight for hubby to go back to Nottingham for 3 weeks --first time in 36 years.I didn't want to go -even to look I love Australia and proud to be a Citizen BUT can accept that not everyone feels the same --good luck wherever you may be Gabby Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tlander56 Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 As these people were ment to be her friends Im sure she was friendly to them. Not everyone regrets returning to the Uk...after 2 years in Brisbane ..and being back for 6 months I can say its the best thing we ever did as a family. I dont think I have ever seen my daughter happier with her family close by. We also have kids running in and out of the back garden every day ...something that never happened in Oz. Both me and my hubby got jobs in building trade and Finance...so I know we are lucky...but if you can get a job its a really good time to return.House prices are cheaper,more pounds for your dollars,Mortgage rates are very low. The most important thing is for people to be happy and being back in scotland has made that possible for my wee family. No regrets here !!!!! I don't think I'll regret returning...Australia just doesn't offer the things I want for my children....loving family around (not just OH and I) educational opportunities, a chance to travel cheaply...bla bla bla.....Aus suits some people without a doubt....not us. We as a family have realised that an 'outdoor', 'laid back' life is not everything....And as for that group of women...well, lets just say I'm looking forward to not having to see them every morning :0) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bentkitty Posted June 23, 2009 Share Posted June 23, 2009 Are you sure you are not being a little hasty here? It is understandable you are upset over those rude comments (who wouldn't be) but are you really going to give them the satisfaction of seeing you run off to your own country with your tail stuck between your legs? I think you should let some time pass so you can reconsider the situation with a calmer frame of mind... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest marriedtoanaussie Posted June 23, 2009 Share Posted June 23, 2009 Are you sure you are not being a little hasty here? It is understandable you are upset over those rude comments (who wouldn't be) but are you really going to give them the satisfaction of seeing you run off to your own country with your tail stuck between your legs? I think you should let some time pass so you can reconsider the situation with a calmer frame of mind... I see you are still in Uk and havent weathered 3.5 yrs of living in Australia like Tlander! I think your 'tail between legs ' is a bit off to be honest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgie Posted June 23, 2009 Share Posted June 23, 2009 Are you sure you are not being a little hasty here? It is understandable you are upset over those rude comments (who wouldn't be) but are you really going to give them the satisfaction of seeing you run off to your own country with your tail stuck between your legs? I think you should let some time pass so you can reconsider the situation with a calmer frame of mind... Bentkitty I think if you re read the original post you will see that Tan had already decided to go back to civilization! She didnt make her mind up after the night out , that just served to prove she had made the right decision in her own mind. She had a bad night out with some bitches from hell by the sound of it and vented on here because if she is anything like me she will have few real friends to vent to in real life ha ha. Hope when you get here you have a nicer time of it. Georgie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bentkitty Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Bentkitty I think if you re read the original post you will see that Tan had already decided to go back to civilization! She didnt make her mind up after the night out , that just served to prove she had made the right decision in her own mind. She had a bad night out with some bitches from hell by the sound of it and vented on here because if she is anything like me she will have few real friends to vent to in real life ha ha. Hope when you get here you have a nicer time of it. Georgie Oops Georgie, you are right, I hadn't read Tlander's original post properly, I thought she decided to leave after a bad night out with those rude girls!! Sounds like the decision was already made and I am sure with other considerations in mind too so I take my comments back! :embarrassed: Good luck to her and hubby with whatever future brings.... I must admit I am terrifed of actually getting there and meeting people now, as we have heard so many horror stories about Poms struggling to make friends, integrate into society etc. We spent three months cycling from Darwin to Sydney a few years back and met and made friends with loads of Aussies and found them all to be very friendly, much more so than the UK... We still keep in touch with some of them. However I should mention most of them were kind grey nomads in the outback who took pity on a couple of knackered cyclists lol....! I can imagine it would be different with the city folk. We do have very thick skins (being quite blunt ourselves lol), and a high pain threshold, but I can understand how it would begin to wear you down after a while. However we are determined that we will not let knockbacks from people like the women Tlander mentions ruin our dream! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Impatient Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 There are rubbish people everywhere and most of us have met them and experienced lows no matter where we are. This experience has strengthened your desire to go home, but do try to remember some good things about your massive adventure. You have done something huge that most people never have the opportunity or courage to do. Be proud that you did it and remember it fondly, even if the balance of your experiences tells you it was the wrong decision. Very best of luck in going back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgie Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Hi Bentkitty I think the majority of people do make friends eventually. Not all Aussies are rude in fact most are friendly. I was standing in a 7/11 shop the other day and asked the shop assistant where a certain street was when an Aussie bloke being served said "what accent is that ? Swahili?" but he said it to the assistant without even looking at me. Now i could have taken it as an insult but knowing the Aussie sense of humour i realized he was just trying to be funny so in reply i asked him" whats your favourite colour Blue? and then said "Where ya from Sydney?" That broke the ice and he smiled and told me he was off the Pommy Land for a visit soon. With regards to myself though, I found it hard to break into the mums groups at school and because i didnt work at first so didnt make any friends but as soon as i started working everyone was brill and had some great pals in Melbourne but on moving up here to Brisbane i havent worked, made no friends and dont like it hence not really tried much as i know i am going home. If you are thick skinned you should do fine as most Aussies seem to be thick skinned too! All the best Georgie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest sunnyday Posted June 24, 2009 Share Posted June 24, 2009 Hi hun, sorry you feel low, if those women have anything about them at all they'd have woken up the next morning with sore heads and felt like complete muppets!!! If they didn't then they're not even worth a thought in your head. Hope your plans work out and keep your chin up they're soooooooooooo not worth it!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gabby Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 I'm fortunate I have most of my family here in Perth W A . I don't see much of them but they are there. ( I have 4 sisters and 1 brother here and 1 brother in Scotland 1 sister in England ) I have the most importanta lot around me 2 sons and families 1 son works o/seas but I have his daughter here and we meet up for school holidays . I email/text my sons everyday and have a good relationship with parners . I also volounteer at a school .I'm the Grannie but have made some lovely friends with yoiung Mums and we "do " lunch occassionally and swap jokes etc-- I sincerely hope you are truly happy back in Scotland Location ???.I bought a ticket for my hubby to gop back to Nottingham to see his two brothers .He leaves in two weeks time. I hope he isn't disappointed after 35 years away-- keep happy Gabby in Perth W A Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gabby Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 please don't be afraid. When we came here in ' 74 we made our decision to say Mornin' and smile to all and sundry .We have never ever had a problem not once and initially all of our friends were true aussies.One freind I met at work laugherd at me when we had picnic BBQ's .I took everything bar kitchen sink --tableclothes napkins etc,etc so she started just bringing the bare neccessitities as she knew I would have all else./We balanced out after a while.We have never looked back since moving here.We had sons aged 6,71/2,9 yrs old.We now have 9 grandchildren and have never once hankered after a visit home -- We are home.---Good onyer 'Aussie land and folks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest treesea Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 I don't think I'll regret returning...Australia just doesn't offer the things I want for my children....loving family around (not just OH and I) educational opportunities, a chance to travel cheaply...bla bla bla.....Aus suits some people without a doubt....not us. We as a family have realised that an 'outdoor', 'laid back' life is not everything....And as for that group of women...well, lets just say I'm looking forward to not having to see them every morning :0) Your post stuck a chord for me. We came back over five years ago now, and at first I worried I would miss Australia - and I have missed it here and there. Now and then, like a bit of nostalgia. But I too wanted different things for my children than what Australia was offering. Like a decent state education, and extended family who are a few hours away rather than a day and a half in an airplane. I like the outdoors too, and that was one of the reasons I came back, so we could enjoy the outdoors in a sunny, dry and cool climate, which is pretty much the east coast of Britain's climate in a nutshell. As to the before school and after school "treadmill" in Australia - music lessons, riding lessons, choir practice, tennis lessons, swimming club - I am SO glad to have escaped that burden. Here, the schools do seem to offer most of these things, even skiing lessons, but here they happen during school time. It's love-ly :-) For making friends in a new city, I would recommend following your interests and joining relevant groups. The thing is with groups of people like workmates or mums at the school gate, these, in some ways, are quite random groupings of people. The chances of finding someone who shares your interests and is a kindred spirit are relatively low compared to those people you find through following your own interests. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petals Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 Interesting the thing I like about Aus is that my children had lots of activities not associated with school and I got to choose who taught them. My daughter learned Piano and Violin and was very involved in youth orchestra and we were able to select her tutors, not have a school do it for us. The whole thing for me was about giving them the best education and activities which I did and spent lots of loot on it but it was worth it. Where did this happen in Australia. I respect that people want to return to UK and if that is what they want fine but I do not think the education is any better, education starts at home and continues in the home and the school is an extension of the time parents are prepared to spend with their children. I also as a parent understand how hard it is for grandparents to lose their grandchilldren to migration and this works both ways, for every Aus that returns with a Brit wife or husband a family in the UK misses out. For every Brit that returns to the UK who has an Aus wife or husband a family in Australia misses out. In most cases it seems to me its the woman who wins out and why is that. Just a view from older shoulders whose children are grown. I really feel for grandparents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest30038 Posted June 28, 2009 Share Posted June 28, 2009 As to the before school and after school "treadmill" in Australia - music lessons, riding lessons, choir practice, tennis lessons, swimming club - I am SO glad to have escaped that burden. One of my boys (Josh) does footy 4 nights a week (2 nights club and 2 nights school) and also does tae kwan do 2 nights a week. On the free night, my other boy goes to piano lessons. This is their choice with no encopuragement from me whatsoever. Josh's school is excellent in that it recognises the sporting contribution at nights and week-ends, (as part of the curriculum), and thus rewards the boys with an extra week's holidays (over other schools) as compensation. kev Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest treesea Posted June 29, 2009 Share Posted June 29, 2009 One of my boys (Josh) does footy 4 nights a week (2 nights club and 2 nights school) and also does tae kwan do 2 nights a week. On the free night, my other boy goes to piano lessons. This is their choice with no encopuragement from me whatsoever. Josh's school is excellent in that it recognises the sporting contribution at nights and week-ends, (as part of the curriculum), and thus rewards the boys with an extra week's holidays (over other schools) as compensation. kev That's all well and good provided that if children want to stop an extra curricular activity, the parents just let them get on with it and don't push them to go on. I suppose we are all influenced by our own experiences growing up. I went to ballet, learnt the violin, was in a youth orchestra, learnt to ride, spent Saturday mornings playing netball - all the usual things middle class parents seem to think their children should know how to do. It made for long days. I have two vivid memories - wanting to quit ballet and not being allowed to, and asking a seven year old friend of my daughter's when we were still in Melbourne if she was enjoying learning to ride, and she said she wasn't really into horses but "her mum wanted her to learn, because she liked riding". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gabby Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 We do enjoy a great outdoor life --except when it rains and it has ( thank goodnes ) this last two weeks.I too have rellies a fight away but that is for holidays etc .What I miss about UK and what we don't always have here ??? Pavements Maybe we are some of the lucky ones we truly settled in Perth from the first week we were here .Hubby got a job,bought a car and kids enrolled at school we never looked back.Hubby off on 14th july for first trip back in 35 years --his family have told him he will be shocked at how things have changed ( Nottingham even Whitley Bay ) so a quick visit of 3 weeks and back home. I work as volounteer at a local Primary school and can see the politics between mums trying to be better than others -- we all have bills to pay we all have drama's from time to time .I say get a life ,be friendly ,live and let live .I hope you are happy with what you have whereever you live. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest30038 Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 That's all well and good provided that if children want to stop an extra curricular activity, the parents just let them get on with it and don't push them to go on. Yep! Agreed! I see so many parents here, trying to live their lives through their kids. Even at club level you can see kids who really aren't comfortable on the field, and their parent's are often the ones shouting the loudest from the sidelines. Josh broke his left arm last season and is out this season having now broken his right!.........can I dissuade him from playing? can I buggery..........he loves it........wish he didn't 'cause the grief it's caused us seeing him in pain is hard to bear at times. He's just had to go back to hospital and have a plate put in.........now we have to wait another 9 months and then he has to go back and have it taken out. We can't wrap him in cotton wool though, although some times I wish we could. kev Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest siamsusie Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 Yep! Agreed! I see so many parents here, trying to live their lives through their kids. Even at club level you can see kids who really aren't comfortable on the field, and their parent's are often the ones shouting the loudest from the sidelines. Josh broke his left arm last season and is out this season having now broken his right!.........can I dissuade him from playing? can I buggery..........he loves it........wish he didn't 'cause the grief it's caused us seeing him in pain is hard to bear at times. He's just had to go back to hospital and have a plate put in.........now we have to wait another 9 months and then he has to go back and have it taken out. We can't wrap him in cotton wool though, although some times I wish we could. kev well grand -dad, whilst your burning the roast and the better half is at work, it is your duty to occupy this young man's mind. I know you men can multi task ... .....:hug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Aldo Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 I used to love doing the school/kindie run just to see the coven of bitches look down their noses at me in disgust. The kindie was on the same estate (didn't even have to go past the security barrier and the speed limit was 15kmph so i used to let thekids hang out of the windows/sunroof saying hello to folk but they never even got a wave in return:wacko: I got a letter telling me off for it!! Oh, how glad i am to be out of that "laid back" place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jimpy Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 glad to see someone happy and lettin the kids chose what makes them happy ,,jim Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest30038 Posted July 2, 2009 Share Posted July 2, 2009 well grand -dad, whilst your burning the roast and the better half is at work, it is your duty to occupy this young man's mind. I know you men can multi task ........:hug: Multi-task?..................when I'm part of the ASD gene pool? :biglaugh: kev Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gabby Posted July 4, 2009 Share Posted July 4, 2009 Aldo !!! makes sense to me !! why would you let your kids hang out of the car ??? especially in school grounds --fine example mate. Australia is a great place to live ( as is UK and any home port ) I believe that when in rome etc etc and remember the reason for moving in first place-- we felt -and been proved correct that our 3 sons and now 9 grandchildren have a better life here than would have had in Nottingham !! --that's how we found it anyway. We enjoy what we do with our family and friends -- I think maybe you wanted people here to change to suit your life and not you to fit in with Australia-- good luck wherever !!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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