Scary and exciting....

[Tulip]

I'm feeling very mixed emotions tonight.

 

Basically my husband has found a way that we MAY be able to get out to Aus sooner. We had originally planned to go out in June, but finances meant that we would have to wait until August. Not because we were low on the cash but because of the way we were being paid monthly, we wouldn't have the cash in hand at the right times, basically.

For months I have been thinking 'August, August.' and this past month my hours has been cut right back down, so we have been worried we mightn't even get out there for August. I've been incredibly stressed and tearful about it, waking up with a pit in my stomach. We're living with my parents and family and it's not ideal, to put it kindly. Today was a breaking point and my husband decided we are not waiting any more (if our plan works out). Suddenly, if may well be June again, which would just be seven weeks away. We have nothing to keep us here so we could actually go.

 

I hadn't predicted how this would send my emotions. I've been waiting, what, a year and a half, two years (?) to move over. Every month has been about the visa, every thought about Australia. I have been so excited. But tonight, mixed in with delight and excitement, is extreme sadness. I will miss my family so much, I will miss England so much. I'm also terrified. I know that moving will be the right thing to do and this is just cold feet, but I had never expected to be this so emotionally fragile.

 

Has anyone else experienced this when their long-term plans materialise? That kind of vertigo?!

[Jacaranda]

Its all normal stuff Tulip.Hard I know but rather than keep focussing on the future,ground yourself into the "now"time and it won't seem to scary.Of course thats hard to do when you have plans to make but.......give yourself mini breaks from thinking about it.When you are doing something,anything,could be washing up(lol)really focus in on whats happening,look closely at the dishes and noticed everything about them!Just really focus on the task at hand,and when you keep doing this,it will take your attention away from the future.and Viola!Mini stress break!Enjoy what time you have left with family and friends and although you will experience some degree of sadness,think positively,and realise how many people love and care about you,and how lucky you are to have them in your life.You'll be fine hon,don't over worry!When you're alone with OH thats the time to share your excitement and feel really happy about your new lives.xx

[Tulip]

Thanks hun, that's just what I needed to hear. You're so right, need to relish the current before thinking about the future. I just think once you start thinking about it all, it all over takes you! I wish I could get out of my own head!

[tayloal]

Tulip, I have wanted to make this move for the past 10-12 years, now the time is right and I have started the process and I have had so many thoughts about whether I am making the right decision. What I have noticed is how I am now in limbo, stuck in an application process that I can't speed up whilst trying to sever ties in a place I have lived all my life, all bar 1 or 2 years. My career is going well and have not long been promoted and i'm thinking, AM I MAD, the answer- only time will tell and it will be another chapter that I myself have created in my life.

Melza is right, you have to look at and live in the 'now' and the tomorrow will soon arrive and you can just go with the flow ! Remember, you're lucky for giving yourself this chance.

Good luck.

[Rupert]

After we made the final decision to go, we did it in three weeks, so it can be done. However if I had the opportunity of an extra two months I would have grabbed it and relished it and made the most of every last minute. August will be here before you know it, why unbalance yourself for the sake of a couple of months. Wait until August and enjoy the time you have left. I am also a bit worried about your comments on finance, sounds like you are just scraping your moving fund together, so an extra couple of months might help you out there too.

[blossom]

I agree with rupert. August will be here in the blink if an eye, and your money will vanish in that same blink. Another couple of months of saving is worth the wait.

[ToothPixie]

Hi Tulip

 

I totally understand how you feel my emotions at the moment are jumping from being totally excited and can not wait to get to Oz to being unsure and wondering why I am leaving what I have here in the UK behind.

 

However ..... Hubby and I have always been envious whenever we heard people talking to us in the past about emigrating to Oz and always use to think that one day we would do it, and in two weeks we will. I have two brothers, three sisters, 12 nephews, a niece and two great niece plus my parents and we are all close.

 

Its only natural to have feelings of doubt and periods thinking of what on earth you are doing ... but listen life's an adventure and if you didn't have one every now and then and didn't take the odd risk, life would become extremely boring. Australia is a chance to live somewhere new, see new places, try something different work wise and also make new friends, meet new people and what's the worse that happens ... If you don't settle or it is not what you hoped for then you can always come back to the UK.... This is what I keep telling myself.

 

Believe me I am nervous and a little worried about how things will be out there BUT so many people would love to be in our position so lets go and have that adventure. Two weeks today at this time we will be on that plane !!!!!

 

Where abouts are you going in Oz? We are heading to the Sunshine Coast.

 

​Good Luck ...... X x x

[Harpodom]

If I was you I'd wait til August, and cram in as much stuff as possible til then. Visit London a few times, the Cotswolds, the South Downs, the Pennines, Norfolk coastline, Cambridge, towns like Rye in East Sussex, or Battle, or Lewes, or...

​

Actually scrap that, go now!

[Tulip]

​Money isn't an issue; whether we go in a month or go in August we'll spend the same amount and save the same amount so it's not really an issue, it's just timing that's the issue. I also totally agree that those last two months doing stuff with family are valuable; but the thing is, we were originally wanting to go in March, we've kept pushing it back, then June was our 'go' date, and then August. So we have done a LOT of 'family' cramming stuff in. I think what I'm really struggling with is that I hadn't expected to be presented with this amount of emotion so soon! I kept thinking 'I know it will be really crap leaving, but I don't have to worry about it for another three months.' and suddenly, it could be much sooner. It's all up in the air right now so it might well be August.

 

I'm so glad that others feel this way though. I feel so stupid for it, because I have spent so long waiting, and I feel so excited, but one minute I'm laughing and excited, the next I'm in tears thinking about people I will miss and England. It's really horrible!

 

Toothpixie, how exciting, two WEEKS! You must be a bag of all emotions then! We're close to you, going to Gold Coast!

[ToothPixie]

Oh my goodness don't feel stupid for the way you are feeling and I was just like you ....... The months have slowly been ticking by and I too have been in a little bubble thinking I have all the time in the world to prepare my emotions for the move. Quite frankly I thought I was being really brave and thinking to myself that I really am going to cope quite well..... But then two weeks to go and I am up and down like a yo yo !!!

 

We had a week on the Gold Coast in Feb .... We liked Broadbeach. We also have friends who live in Paradise Point and have been there for 8 years..... they love it.

 

My stomach is doing flip flops at the moment, my eyes are wanting to close and sleep but my mind is WIDE AWAKE.

 

​x x x

[MrsRead]

Hi Tulip, it's perfectly natural to feel that way. I personally cannot wait to the day we land in Oz, but we haven't actually got a moving date yet and I know when that happens, I'll no doubt have a few wobbles too. There isn't much I'm going to miss about the UK, but leaving my parents is going to be a terrible wrench emotionally, and they're really not taking it very well at the moment. I'm feeling quite traumatised right now as yesterday my parents threw a spanner in the works (I suspect deliberately) and it's a horrible situation as I wanted to spend as much quality time with them as possible, but now I don't want to visit them if they are going to be "difficult". I told Hubby yesterday that I just want to get on the plane asap! Hope it all works out for you.

[Incata]

Tulip

 

I had wanted to escape for years. My kids were very close to their grandparents and I did (and still do) feel very guilty about separating them. I was looking forward to it ever so much. My husband came out here 3 weeks before the kids and I did and then it hit me. I felt so sick, sick with fear about what we were doing and why we were doing it.

 

I only stopped feeling that way when we landed, I saw my husband, he gave me a hug and said that everything was going to be fine.

 

It is.

 

Good luck!

 

Carolyn

[Tulip]

I can't tell you how relieved I feel that what I'm going through is normal! It looks like it will be June, eep.

[d4ddyc00l]

We've got just over 4 weeks, and it's really starting to hit home now. We're selling our stuff rather than shipping, and we started sorting it all out a couple of weeks ago. The house is a mess now with boxes all over - its definitely stressing us all out! Having said that I'm so excited about going that I'm not thinking too much about the negatives at the moment.

 

We've got the in-laws visiting this weekend followed by my parents the following weekend. That's going to be quite hard and I know my wife is going to be very emotional!

 

i just can't wait until that plane takes off and we start our new lives. I'm sure you'll be fine as well, and if you can do June without losing out financially then I'd say go for it.

[Candygirl]

Ah Tulip, it is natural, don't beat yourself up over it Hon :hug:. I have read loads of posts about it really sinking in and people thinking "what am I doing". I had a bit of a day the other week when I was just overwhelmed with everything and I thought I must be mad to put myself through this. I had longed for the day to get going and start packing and when I was in the position of being able to do it, I had a meltdown. I think it just hit me. The two visas coming through so quick and the house selling in the same week.

 

I have also lived with my Outlaws in the past, and it is not easy. If you are really struggling with living with family, then perhaps really consider going earlier. If you could find some way of coping, then I would grin and bear it and wait until August, I am sure the extra money from working and saving will be very useful once you get there and will defo give you more options.

 

I am sure whatever you decide, it will be the right decision for you Guys and your beautiful pooch. Take care Lorraine x

[Tulip]

Thanks Lorraine, I haven't gotten to packing yet but I think that will be the fun part as I love throwing out old clothes in favour for new ones. Would you believe the dog has been the easy part of this now, I've spent all day trying to organise myself and moving over, and it's only taken a quick email to sort her out. Up until now she has been the hardest thing!

 

Booking flights on Monday after the medical (seemed silly to book them a few days before, in case I have some incredibly disease that's a mystery to me), sending police check in soon, soon as that's been sent back I can send it in to CO...and then we're good to go *gulp*. Dog needs a blood test 28 days before she flies, and then she leaves on the 24th. We should fly out a few days after. Can't believe it's happening.

[Loretta Farrell]

Reading all the above makes me smile... I'm normal. I was born in OZ and returning with kids after almost 10 years.

And have the same feelings despite going to family.

 

Nothing is forever and you can change direction anytime. Go for your dreams

Look out the window if you have had a bad day you can always go for a walk outside.

And for the first few years in just t-shirt.

 

Bring in on. The land of sunburn and very expensive electricity.

[Acidglitter]

Hi Tulip,

 

Sooo glad you posted this thread as it's made me realise from others responses that it is natural to have this bitter sweet sort of feeling.

 

I'm in a similar situation to you in that me & my o/h didn't know our timescale and things have been extremely slow with little to no guarantee of emigrating...then out of the blue he has been head hunted for two jobs and at present is negotiating with the company...if he choose to go ahead he will be flying out within 6 weeks and we have said for me to come out a month or so later as i will be sorting the dogs/shipping etc whilst he find somewhere to rent. So all of a sudden it's like all systems go...which is exciting, but at the same time suddenly things just got very real and the nervousness and anxiety that comes with that i'm sure are soon to set in.

Overall i feel optimistic as i have my friends & family's support but it's just that initial step of actually saying out loud, "we're moving to Australia in x amount of time"

 

​Goodluck to you! Keep us posted...