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Older teens making friends in Aus


tahm563

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Hi,

I am an Australian married to Brit, have been living in the UK last 18 years. Now thinking of moving back. We have three kids who will be 18,16 and 10 when we move back (hopefully all will go well). My family lives there and kids visit frequently. They are happy to move so far. Eldest will start uni and 16 year old will start in year 11. 

I wanted to ask others how hard/easy was it for your older kids to make lifelong friends there? Most of my friends who I kept in touch with back home (in sydney) are from high school. Not really in touch with uni friends. When I look at my siblings, most of their lifelong friends are also from high school. That makes me feel worried about whether the older kids will be able to make good lifelong friends since they are starting their there as almost adults. Just don't want them to be miserable there. Would love to hear your experiences of older kids. 

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If they're outgoing and affable they'll make  friends. Why the focus on "lifelong" friends? My sons don't have any - all school friends moved on - geographically and socially. They didn't make great Uni friends because of the ways Unis are these days. Then they've made friends in workplaces which have generally been workplace dependent and friends with interests which have been interest dependent. They'll be fine.

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On 22/01/2024 at 06:13, tahm563 said:

Hi,

I am an Australian married to Brit, have been living in the UK last 18 years. Now thinking of moving back. We have three kids who will be 18,16 and 10 when we move back (hopefully all will go well). My family lives there and kids visit frequently. They are happy to move so far. Eldest will start uni and 16 year old will start in year 11. 

I wanted to ask others how hard/easy was it for your older kids to make lifelong friends there? Most of my friends who I kept in touch with back home (in sydney) are from high school. Not really in touch with uni friends. When I look at my siblings, most of their lifelong friends are also from high school. That makes me feel worried about whether the older kids will be able to make good lifelong friends since they are starting their there as almost adults. Just don't want them to be miserable there. Would love to hear your experiences of older kids. 

Lifelong friends?  What a strange concept..

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  • 2 months later...

Moving back to Australia after living in the UK for 18 years sounds like a big change, but it's wonderful that your family is open to the idea and that you have your support network waiting for you there. When my family moved countries when I was a teenager, I was worried about fitting in and making friends, especially since I had already established friendships back home. However, I found that kids are often more adaptable than we give them credit for. They're resilient and can surprise us with their ability to connect with others, even in new environments.

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On 28/01/2024 at 06:17, Bulya said:

Lifelong friends?  What a strange concept..

I have 9 friends most I have known from childhood some from high school. We are all in our 60s and keep in touch. They are having another reunion next month a weekend in a holiday home in UK. I can’t go this year so will be joining them remotely!  
These are deep connections. 

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On 28/01/2024 at 06:47, Bulya said:

Lifelong friends?  What a strange concept..

Not in my world.  My late husband was very sociable and had many friends from his school days until the end, even though most had moved elsewhere at some stage.  I'm not very sociable but still meet a couple of times a year with a group of girls from my high school class - and we are all turning 77 this year.  We also all lived interstate or overseas at times before returning to Tasmania.

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On 22/01/2024 at 06:13, tahm563 said:

I wanted to ask others how hard/easy was it for your older kids to make lifelong friends there?

They are still at an age where it will be easy to make friends with similar interests even if they don't turn out to be "lifelong".  It's certainly much easier than for older ages  who typically have family/work commitments which allow them little time/energy to form new friendship groups.

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