scotinoz43 Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 Please hear my story and give me any ideas you've got. I've lived in Oz for 12 years with my Aussie partner. we have been together the whole time and 3 children, ages 10, 8 and 5. We tried to move back in 2009 and sold our house to do so, but immigration laws made it too hard and we came back. We tried to recover but I missed Scotland more and last year we applied for a spouse visa. We sent it off in April. In June I took the kids over to Scotland. We were hoping to get settled (part of the requirement) and wait for an answer.My partner came over in July for 3 weeks. It took till October before we got the letter saying visa declined. But we could appeal. we took advice and went for an oral hearing. We paid the money for it and then waited for an answer. In the mean time the kids were crying at night about missing their dad and I was under the strain of looking after them without him and having to search for full time work (also part of the requirement) and them starting new school/life. My daughter, who loved school in Oz, was crying all the time and saying she had tummy pains and not wanting to go to school. I took her to the doctor 7 times in 2 weeks, but they were sure there was nothing physically wrong with her. Half the reason I wanted to go back to Scotland in the first place was because I suffer from anxiety and have a hypothyroid disorder, so this wasn't really helping me out any. My partner was coming back to Scotland for Christmas and we still hadn't had a date for the hearing a week before Christmas so we decided to call it quits and book flights back to Oz so we could travel back with him after Christmas. The next day in the mail we got the letter saying our hearing was to be, wait for it, ON VALENTINES DAY :frown: . But, because the kids were pretty excited to be coming back to oz and we were struggling with money so we decided to come back anyway. It all sounds so dumb and every day I wonder why I didn't just stay but at the time it was all just such a struggle. I wish uk immigration could see the heartache I have and the sadness in my soul and how much they have cost our family, emotionally and financially. I don't know what to do now. I still want to be there every day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotinoz43 Posted August 15, 2014 Author Share Posted August 15, 2014 also, I tried everything I could to get help whilst there but it was like banging my head of a wall because immigration matters go through London so MSPs couldn't help me and the local MP was useless Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Que Sera Sera Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 I'm sorry this is causing so much stress but as I read it, unless I'm missing something, is it just you that wants to come back? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotinoz43 Posted August 15, 2014 Author Share Posted August 15, 2014 um yup. pretty much. which is why im back here because it seems like everyone else was happier here except myself. I couldn't keep my family split up any more. I do believe if we all lived there together it would have been fine and I wasn't saying it was forever- just a while. I brought my kids up without my family and I just wanted them to experience my family/ way of life because we don't get any support from my partner's side, except his grandmother. When we were there they got more love from other family members than they ever get here ( bar great nan). Like you know sharing birthdays and outings and just everyday life. My partner has sisters whose kids get all the attention from his parents so it's always hard to watch kids missing out on their grandparents. When we had the kids I think we just assumed livng in Scotland would be a possibility and the fact that I had no trouble living in Oz probably gave us the wrong idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotinoz43 Posted August 15, 2014 Author Share Posted August 15, 2014 ps thank you so much for replying :wink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Que Sera Sera Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 I'm not sure the way to make you happier is to make the rest of the family unhappy. Its an awful position to be in and there are a few on here that have had to sacrifice their iown happiness for that of the family. Catch 22 situation and I feel for you. Hopefullysomeone with experience of this will be along soon to help. Good luck:wubclub: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul1Perth Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 um yup. pretty much. which is why im back here because it seems like everyone else was happier here except myself. I couldn't keep my family split up any more. I do believe if we all lived there together it would have been fine and I wasn't saying it was forever- just a while. I brought my kids up without my family and I just wanted them to experience my family/ way of life because we don't get any support from my partner's side, except his grandmother. When we were there they got more love from other family members than they ever get here ( bar great nan). Like you know sharing birthdays and outings and just everyday life. My partner has sisters whose kids get all the attention from his parents so it's always hard to watch kids missing out on their grandparents. When we had the kids I think we just assumed livng in Scotland would be a possibility and the fact that I had no trouble living in Oz probably gave us the wrong idea. Wouldn't worry too much about the kids. We lived close to my grandparents and cousins but me and my Sister used to dread the Sunday afternoons when we got dragged to Grandmas, it was always boring. I remember my Grandads just. They died when I was pretty young, from war injuries. I didn't really have much in common with my cousins, we got on fine when we met up but it hasn't mattered to me and my sis that we didn't see them that much. We had lots of friends and that's who we would still be closest to, if we had the chance to see them again. I think if people are close to their own family they assume everyone id the same. Not always the case. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumpkin Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 Please hear my story and give me any ideas you've got. I've lived in Oz for 12 years with my Aussie partner. we have been together the whole time and 3 children, ages 10, 8 and 5. We tried to move back in 2009 and sold our house to do so, but immigration laws made it too hard and we came back. We tried to recover but I missed Scotland more and last year we applied for a spouse visa. We sent it off in April. In June I took the kids over to Scotland. We were hoping to get settled (part of the requirement) and wait for an answer.My partner came over in July for 3 weeks. It took till October before we got the letter saying visa declined. But we could appeal. we took advice and went for an oral hearing. We paid the money for it and then waited for an answer. In the mean time the kids were crying at night about missing their dad and I was under the strain of looking after them without him and having to search for full time work (also part of the requirement) and them starting new school/life. My daughter, who loved school in Oz, was crying all the time and saying she had tummy pains and not wanting to go to school. I took her to the doctor 7 times in 2 weeks, but they were sure there was nothing physically wrong with her. Half the reason I wanted to go back to Scotland in the first place was because I suffer from anxiety and have a hypothyroid disorder, so this wasn't really helping me out any. My partner was coming back to Scotland for Christmas and we still hadn't had a date for the hearing a week before Christmas so we decided to call it quits and book flights back to Oz so we could travel back with him after Christmas. The next day in the mail we got the letter saying our hearing was to be, wait for it, ON VALENTINES DAY :frown: . But, because the kids were pretty excited to be coming back to oz and we were struggling with money so we decided to come back anyway. It all sounds so dumb and every day I wonder why I didn't just stay but at the time it was all just such a struggle. I wish uk immigration could see the heartache I have and the sadness in my soul and how much they have cost our family, emotionally and financially. I don't know what to do now. I still want to be there every day. Well I do agree that it should be easy for your husband to get a UK partner visa or whatever it I called considering a Scottish wife and three children. But why was it hard in 2009? I know it has got hard recently but don't remember it was hard before. And why did you take the children and leave? Why not make the decision together, get the necessary visa in place and then make these move as a family. Rather than fragment your family. You are putting yourself through unnecessary pain, nobody else is. I would not dream of moving anywhere ahead of my husband, we don't even have children but we move together or we don't move at all. Maybe try that approach next time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bell123321 Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 Well I do agree that it should be easy for your husband to get a UK partner visa or whatever it I called considering a Scottish wife and three children. But why was it hard in 2009? I know it has got hard recently but don't remember it was hard before. And why did you take the children and leave? Why not make the decision together, get the necessary visa in place and then make these move as a family. Rather than fragment your family. You are putting yourself through unnecessary pain, nobody else is. I would not dream of moving anywhere ahead of my husband, we don't even have children but we move together or we don't move at all. Maybe try that approach next time. I am not 100% sure but I think with getting a UK partner visa the sponsoring partner needs to have a wage of £18k or more if children are involved before they can get a partner visa for their partner, as well as proving you have suitable accommodation. I am assuming with last attempt the OP was trying to met those two requirements before they could get a partner visa to allow her partner to move? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumpkin Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 I am not 100% sure but I think with getting a UK partner visa the sponsoring partner needs to have a wage of £18k or more if children are involved before they can get a partner visa for their partner, as well as proving you have suitable accommodation. I am assuming with last attempt the OP was trying to met those two requirements before they could get a partner visa to allow her partner to move? Yes as I said, I understand why it is hard now. But this is relatively new and I am sure was not the case in 2009 when OP moved back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cjscjs Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 (edited) I feel for you I really do, however Australian immigration is no different and in reality probably a whole lot harder. I don't hear people accusing the Australian government of being torturers. Probably because Australia has always been tough unlike the UK which has been quite lax, to put it mildly. Recently they have tightened up on immigration and just like Australia you will have to satisfy certain criteria before they allow you in. You need to jump through all the hoops pay your NON refundable deposits and maybe just maybe you'll get in. Edited August 15, 2014 by cjscjs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kellyv Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 At the end of the day you, your husband and your children are the most important family unit. Yes, maybe in Scotland extended family were very involved but remember this has a novelty factor. When everyday routibe kicks in you may not see them that much at all. At the end of the day you need to stick together as a family unit and you will be happier for it. Good luck x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jurls Posted August 15, 2014 Share Posted August 15, 2014 I feel for you I really do, however Australian immigration is no different and in reality probably a whole lot harder. I don't hear people accusing the Australian government of being torturers. Probably because Australia has always been tough unlike the UK which has been quite lax, to put it mildly. Recently they have tightened up on immigration and just like Australia you will have to satisfy certain criteria before they allow you in. You need to jump through all the hoops pay your NON refundable deposits and maybe just maybe you'll get in. Actually since 2012 it is far more difficult to obtain a spouse visa from the UK than Australia I think. The key thing about the financial requirements being that the British sponsor is the one who has to earn the £18,600 (or more) to meet the requirements and they don't take the family income as a whole into account. This immediately is an issue if the British sponsor isn't the main breadwinner, perhaps they have been at home bringing up a family for example. To discount the spouses earning power is ridiculous as most people consider their finances as a family. More information on requirements and who it affects can be found here http://britcits.blogspot.co.uk/2013/01/introduction.html The legislation has effectively exiled many Brits overseas, meanwhile, any European can live and work in the UK.... Having said that, I too, as Pumpkin noted, this legislation was not in place in 2009 so I am not sure what caused the OPs attempt, to fail back then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotinoz43 Posted October 30, 2014 Author Share Posted October 30, 2014 Thanks..I like this advice ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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