klm081 Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 Apologies in advance at this post! Using this as a therapeutic (hopefully tool). Moved to WA 3 months ago with my teenage son from the UK where I had lots of great friends and a great support system. I knew it would be hard coming and not knowing anyone, but had no idea it would emotionally be THIS hard. I love WA and my son is settling in brilliantly. I have found work and everyone I come into contact with has been extremely nice. But I have no friends! I know good friendships take a long time to establish but where do you even start?! The people I work with are all older than me with families of their own. I have started activities such as fitness classes but although everyone is friendly its not the place to talk! A few people have been lovely and given me their number and promised to get together for a cuppa and a chat but it never happens! I am feeling really really down today and having a good cry feeling sorry for myself! I feel pathetic!:sad: I was supposed to meet with someone this morning for coffee and got up and got ready all excited and they cancelled at the last minute for reasons I totally understand I'm just really disappointed! At this rate I'll be on the anti depressants before long ha ha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harpodom Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 As Quoll would say, its time to put on your big girl panties and knuckle down. It takes frikkin ages to make friends as a newbie adult in a strange place. Its like everyone senses you despair and shies away from you. Take heart, its normal to feel like a social leper. The question is how you deal with that. Do you go out all guns blazing making eye contact with every Tom, Dick and Harry (and risk adopting a few nutters along the way), or do you say "f4ck it, I'll be myself and if anyone comes along, great"? Apologies in advance at this post! Using this as a therapeutic (hopefully tool). Moved to WA 3 months ago with my teenage son from the UK where I had lots of great friends and a great support system. I knew it would be hard coming and not knowing anyone, but had no idea it would emotionally be THIS hard. I love WA and my son is settling in brilliantly. I have found work and everyone I come into contact with has been extremely nice. But I have no friends! I know good friendships take a long time to establish but where do you even start?! The people I work with are all older than me with families of their own. I have started activities such as fitness classes but although everyone is friendly its not the place to talk! A few people have been lovely and given me their number and promised to get together for a cuppa and a chat but it never happens! I am feeling really really down today and having a good cry feeling sorry for myself! I feel pathetic!:sad: I was supposed to meet with someone this morning for coffee and got up and got ready all excited and they cancelled at the last minute for reasons I totally understand I'm just really disappointed! At this rate I'll be on the anti depressants before long ha ha! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest74886 Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 Apologies in advance at this post! Using this as a therapeutic (hopefully tool). Moved to WA 3 months ago with my teenage son from the UK where I had lots of great friends and a great support system. I knew it would be hard coming and not knowing anyone, but had no idea it would emotionally be THIS hard. I love WA and my son is settling in brilliantly. I have found work and everyone I come into contact with has been extremely nice. But I have no friends! I know good friendships take a long time to establish but where do you even start?! The people I work with are all older than me with families of their own. I have started activities such as fitness classes but although everyone is friendly its not the place to talk! A few people have been lovely and given me their number and promised to get together for a cuppa and a chat but it never happens! I am feeling really really down today and having a good cry feeling sorry for myself! I feel pathetic!:sad: I was supposed to meet with someone this morning for coffee and got up and got ready all excited and they cancelled at the last minute for reasons I totally understand I'm just really disappointed! At this rate I'll be on the anti depressants before long ha ha! Sorry , can't help much I'm afraid other than to say the obvious which is that it is early days and it takes longer to bridge the gap here and start to make good friends, also we have found that Australians have a propensity to cry off at the last minute so it's nothing to do with you personally it's just how it is here. Looking on the bright side your son is settling well which must be a welcome plus. Stick with it it will pick up I'm sure Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JK2510 Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 Where in WA are you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klm081 Posted April 22, 2013 Author Share Posted April 22, 2013 I wouldn't be at all surprised if they can indeed sense my despair and desperation ha ha! I will carry on going and stick at it and see what happens - I hate feeling like this as I'm not usually the type and I'm so grateful that things are going so well and that my son is so so so happy! I'm sure I will feel better tomorrow, today I will just embrace the fact I'm having a down day and have a good cry. Again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klm081 Posted April 22, 2013 Author Share Posted April 22, 2013 Near Joondalup Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JK2510 Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 I don't mind meeting up for a drink one day,if you could bear with me,as i work 5 1/2 days per week. I only live a few kms from that area and I'm sure many others do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klm081 Posted April 22, 2013 Author Share Posted April 22, 2013 Ah thank you that would be great! I work shifts myself so not a problem! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kubby Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 Apologies in advance at this post! Using this as a therapeutic (hopefully tool). Moved to WA 3 months ago with my teenage son from the UK where I had lots of great friends and a great support system. I knew it would be hard coming and not knowing anyone, but had no idea it would emotionally be THIS hard. I love WA and my son is settling in brilliantly. I have found work and everyone I come into contact with has been extremely nice. But I have no friends! I know good friendships take a long time to establish but where do you even start?! The people I work with are all older than me with families of their own. I have started activities such as fitness classes but although everyone is friendly its not the place to talk! A few people have been lovely and given me their number and promised to get together for a cuppa and a chat but it never happens! I am feeling really really down today and having a good cry feeling sorry for myself! I feel pathetic!:sad: I was supposed to meet with someone this morning for coffee and got up and got ready all excited and they cancelled at the last minute for reasons I totally understand I'm just really disappointed! At this rate I'll be on the anti depressants before long ha ha! Give it another couple of months and you will be fine.. Believe me as I speak from my experience.. It took me hard 10 months to settle down.. My case was even worst as I had to share house with a nutter ! Cheer up ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the bottler Posted April 23, 2013 Share Posted April 23, 2013 I think it helps to come on here if you are having a difficult time ... by writing it down it is out of your head which I find helps me ... there are some great people on here who are very supportive ... I hope you are feeling easier today ... it will get better it just takes time ... take care ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nicolac34 Posted April 23, 2013 Share Posted April 23, 2013 Are you on the sister site PerthPoms? Have a look on there in the socialising bit - that's where my husband and I met all of the people we now know over here, it takes a while and a lot of effort and doing things you might not necessarily want to do - but if you show willing then I'm sure there are plenty of like minded people for you to get in touch with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted April 23, 2013 Share Posted April 23, 2013 What do they say, hope for the best, expect the worst and take what comes. If you resign yourself to never having friendships but still put yourself out there you'll be pleasantly surprised if one day you click with someone and you might be surprised when it happens. Friendships are hard - I have very few Aussie friends even after 32 yrs but I guess I got used to having acquaintances which came and went with the times. I've had to make new connections here now I am back home and find that those made with people with similar interests have been easiest (do you knit? Knitters are a friendly bunch!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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