Lambethlad

This appeared on Facebook today. Interesting set of observations from a visitor from the other side of the Pacific. David Mason is a US writer and professor, and poet laureate of Colorado. 1... Health care. I know the controversies, but basic national health care is a gift. In America, medical expenses are a leading cause of bankruptcy. The drug companies dominate politics and advertising. Obama is being crucified for taking halting baby steps towards sanity. You can't turn on the telly without hours of drug advertisements - something I have never yet seen here. And your emphasis on prevention - making cigarettes less accessible, for one - is a model. 2... Food. Yes, we have great food in America too, especially in the big cities. But your bread is less sweet, your lamb is cheaper, and your supermarket vegetables and fruits are fresher than ours. Too often in my country an apple is a ball of pulp as big as your face. The dainty Pink Lady apples of Oz are the juiciest I've had. And don't get me started on coffee. In American small towns it tastes like water flavoured with burnt dirt, but the smallest shop in the smallest town in Oz can make a first-rate latte. I love your ubiquitous bakeries, your hot-cross buns. Shall I go on? 3... Language. How do you do it? The rhyming slang and Aboriginal place names like magic spells. Words that seem vaguely English yet also resemble an argot from another planet. I love the way institutional names get turned into diminutives - Vinnie's and Salvos - and absolutely nothing's sacred. Everything's an opportunity for word games and everyone's a nickname. Lingo makes the world go round. It's the spontaneous wit of the people that tickles me most. Late one night at a barbie my new mate Suds remarked, ''Nothing's the same since 24-7.'' Amen. 4... Free-to-air TV. In Oz, you buy a TV, plug it in and watch some of the best programming I've ever seen - uncensored. In America, you can't get diddly-squat without paying a cable or satellite company heavy fees. In Oz a few channels make it hard to choose. In America, you've got 400 channels and nothing to watch. 5... Small shops. Outside the big cities in America corporations have nearly erased them. Identical malls with identical restaurants serving inferior food. Except for geography, it's hard to tell one American town from another. The ''take-away'' culture here is wonderful. Human encounters are real - stirring happens, stories get told. The curries are to die for. And you don't have to tip! 6... Free camping. We used to have this too, and I guess it's still free when you backpack miles away from the roads. But I love the fact that in Oz everyone owns the shore and in many places you can pull up a camper van and stare at the sea for weeks. I love the ''primitive'' and independent campgrounds, the life out of doors. The few idiots who leave their stubbies and rubbish behind in these pristine places ought to be transported in chains. 7... Religion. In America, it's everywhere - especially where it's not supposed to be, like politics. I imagine you have your Pharisees too, making a big public show of devotion, but I have yet to meet one here. 8... Roads. Peak hour aside, I've found travel on your roads pure heaven. My country's ''freeways'' are crowded, crumbling, insanely knotted with looping overpasses - it's like racing homicidal maniacs on fraying spaghetti. I've taken the Hume without stress, and I love the Princes Highway when it's two lanes. Ninety minutes south of Bateman's Bay I was sorry to see one billboard for a McDonald's. It's blocking a lovely paddock view. Someone should remove it. 9... Real multiculturalism. I know there are tensions, just like anywhere else, but I love the distinctiveness of your communities and the way you publicly acknowledge the Aboriginal past. Recently, too, I spent quality time with Melbourne Greeks, and was gratified both by their devotion to their own great language and culture and their openness to an Afghan lunch. 10. Fewer guns. You had Port Arthur in 1996 and got real in response. America replicates such massacres several times a year and nothing changes. Why? Our religion of individual rights makes the good of the community an impossible dream. Instead of mateship we have ''It's mine and nobody else's''. We talk a great game about freedom, but too often live in fear. There's more to say - your kaleidoscopic birds, your perfumed bush in springtime, your vast beaches. These are just a few blessings that make Australia a rarity. Of course, it's not paradise - nowhere is - but I love it here. No need to wave flags like Americans and add to the world's windiness. Just value what you have and don't give it away. Source: http://www.theage.com.au/comment/put-away-the-flags-and-enjoy-your-country-on-australia-day-20140125-31fm4.html

You sound like you're having great time. Good luck with everything. I was wondering why it takes 24 hours to get from Singapore to Fiji.

I need a penis enhancement procedure. I know this because I keep receiving emails offering pills that will enlarge me. Also I have seen many "adult" videos that have convinced me of my inadequacy. I'm wondering if Medicare will pay for this.

The Australian taxpayer has been ripped off long enough for our infrastructure by Australian companies and workers. Here in south-east Melbourne we are desperate for new roads, bridges, freeways etc. If Chinese companies can build them in half the time for half the cost I'm all for it. Also I don't care if the Chinese are buying up the top end of the housing market. Most people could never afford to live in Toorak or Camberwell anyway. Hopefully it will trickle down and push up values in undervalued suburbs.

New home building is booming in Melbourne. Most new houses in Melbourne are of the brick veneer type. Son-law works for a major company that produces house frames and roof trusses - two months ago they had to stop taking orders because they just couldn't keep up with demand.

There must be at least one positive story from WDU.

Thanks for pointing that out. I do live in Skye and have done for the last 30 years. I always thought I was lucky living on 8 acres of peaceful paradise. Now I find I have been living in the worst place in Melbourne!

This has got to be a joke. For instance no one in their right mind would choose to live in Frankston North with its poverty, unemployment, crime and drug problems yet it is ranked much higher than Frankston and Frankston South which are vastly nicer areas. Frankston North has low property prices for a reason.

The only 7 seater I have driven is the Kia Carnival which is a dedicated people mover. It was very spacious and comfortable, easy to park and had plenty of power. I thought the sliding doors were great - it was very easy to get in and out of. 4x4s and SUVs are just wagons with an extra seat bunged in the back. If you don't need a 4x4 or SUV I would recommend the Kia.

I spent a couple of weeks in Cairns and Port Douglas in August and didn't see one mosquito or one fly. Everything was perfect. Also, I did swim in the sea as it was winter and the stingers had cleared off. I would love to live there. One thing I really loved in Cairns was the Woolworths Supermarket where they had two Japanese chefs creating the most stunning takeaway Sushi dishes.

It's a terrible traumatic situation for the children. Get the best legal help you can afford. The welfare of the kids is the most important thing and the law will decide what's best for them. Good luck.

Point taken. I can understand someone being unhappy but blaming and slagging off a whole nation and its people is a bit over the top.

Yeah and I also feel sorry for the 15 people who have "liked" the post they must be a sorry lot.

Pure greed.

Here I am having a great life and thinking Oz is the best place on earth to live, but after reading your post I realise it is really a living hell. I will try much harder to be miserable in the future. I am thinking you are probably winding us up - anyone who hates Oz as much as you wouldn't have stayed so long.

50 is only old when you're applying for a job.

There are 6120 overseas born prisoners in jail in Oz. It costs $300 a day to keep them in jail. I make that about 670 million dollars a year it's costing Oz taxpayers. So I reckon when they are found guilty, don't put them in jail - march them out of the court and put them on the next plane home.

Yes, the whole policy of "burn-offs" is madness. Too many get out of control taking lives, livestock, native animals and homes. Not to mention the massive amount of pollution and carbon released into the atmosphere. I would be surprised if there was any evidence that "burn-offs" have any benefit in preventing fires.

And well done to the Wallabies for putting England out of their home tournament. As for damn Hawthorn enough said.

If your daughter is of good character, has common sense and high moral values she will stay out of trouble no matter where she lives. Australia has the same problems as any other country but I prefer to live in Oz because in my opinion it is a much nicer place to live, with the lifestyle and climate more suitable for me.

It's freezing at the moment but it's going to heat up by the weekend and get into the low 30s early next week before getting cold again. Christmas is usually mild, occasionally very cold or very hot. I don't know anyone who goes to the beach on Christmas day.

It was my opinion - I wasn't arguing. Bolt does have his own TV show on Sunday afternoon on the 10 network. When I'm in Sydney I like listening to Jones and Hadley - it gives me a good laugh and makes me feel grateful I live in Melbourne.

I opened it up but I'm not a subscriber so couldn't read it but I did see Andrew Bolt's name so I know it would have been the usual garbage he spouts. So far I haven't heard anyone express disappointment in Abbott's demise except Bolt, Hadley and Jones but that's no surprise.

Hate Hawthorn but they are a great team and were just too good again.

Well I was just being silly - a failed attempt at humour. My wife always tells me "you're not funny so don't even try".