Helz980

I've been reading up on all this just now. I will say we are on decent terms (he is a decent bloke tbh & we don't argue all that much) & you are right that I should get back then work the rest out. Everything will be ok...positive positive positive ?

I think like you 3fatcats! I can easily survive on my own tbh albeit he provides the money I bring Olivia up & have pretty much done since she left hospital! He works away so it's just me & her & when he's back he sometimes can't be bothered with her. He just wants to go fishing! **** do I need documentation to take Olivia?

aww hun, i hadn't realised it was like that for you & your hubby. How long have you been back in England? xxxxx

Hello! thanks for replying! Melza, I went back home end of july on a decision making holiday & I knew as soon as I landed in Newcastle I felt better. OH came back for 4 weeks as he had to go back to work. Anyway we had a massive row over the phone when he was back there & I was still at home, basically I told him I wasn't coming back. But we talked & we agreed that I came back for a 6 month 'holiday' to plan & strategise the move back. So fast forward to now & its not like that at all. He refuses to talk about it until the new year, & we only talked about it when I made him. I have stood my ground & said this is whats happening. He certainly wont be coming back in april as he will be working, & to be honest this doesn't bother me. I will be honest with you ladies that my feelings for him have changed a lot whilst ive been going through this. The only person that matters to me is my daughter & of course my family. This is what he said to me. - you don't live in the real world - England is **** theres nothing there for me - you will probably need professional help for the rest of your life - I married you & not your family - im happy here can you not just go home for a holiday - im selfish - you will never survive without me BUT he then says you are a big girl Helen & can make your own decisions & im not making you stay here. So ultimately i think i need to go for him to have a very big think about what he wants. AND because i have heard all of what he has said above before its like water off a ducks back, it doesn't actually resonate with me anymore because i do think the counselling sessions i had have helped & im pretty damn determined that im home in 18 weeks, albeit with just a bag & Olivia! stuff is just stuff! i am planning stuff in bitesize chunks & i know this is just one xmas & i will have many more at home!! i would love to book a plane ticket but with what? i don't have a penny to my name & i think i will have to ask my mam to pay for my flights. 3fatcats that's a good way to look at it! im on holiday so stuff xmas lol! i feel incredibly guilty for bringing my daughter back here as she was so happy in England, but maybe shes just picking up on me as for a 2 year old shes pretty bright. anyway i do feel better for writing everything down, ive got some lovely friends here who are amazing & understand how i am feeling. Thank you ladies, i have re read my earlier post & i do sound a bit like a nutter lol! xxx

Oh I've only got 18 weeks left ?

Hello lovelies i never thought I'd be in this position again but I'm so bloody unhappy, I wish I had never come back even if it is for 6 months. My anxiety has come back & I've been getting upset. I feel permanently sick & losing weight (I am eating) can't believe how much being here has such a horrible effect on me. I was great at home & knew that's where I want to be but I promised hubby to come back for a 6 month holiday. However I tried to talk to him about stuff & he was so nasty & I don't know who he is anymore. People warned me this would happen & I said no it wouldn't! I'm trying to be positive but I'm in that cycle again. Sorry people I daren't post this on the other board as for Xmas it doesn't exist in my world.

Yep!!! He's being an arse again. Thing is I've spotted something that I've wanted to do since I left school & I think maybe I should go for it, shy bairns get nowt!! It would be a massive career change just hope I'm not too old!!

Yes I will be @auntagatha!! I might try old networks but seeing as I worked for the government might be no good!! Thanks for all your advice though! Plus I'm not sure what I want to do lol, just got to get out there & have a look!! Hubby on the other hand has put his head in the sand again tut. I need to get my flights booked soon at this rate ill be coming back with just a bag & leaving the material stuff in a skip & starting from scratch! I honestly wish I'd never come back to oz.

thank you!! Luckily hubby will be staying here to work longer plus we still own our house & have a good family who can help so asking employers to fund a move back I'd never even thought of it!! Lol. I know I can do this I've been through worse!

Thanks!! First thing I need to do is update my cv! I'm a bit worried though cos I've not worked since I had my daughter! But I will not be phased by the challenge. I need to get my project manager head on & get the ball rolling!!

Those of you who are going or already back in the UK. Did you apply for jobs before you went back? How did that work ie you obviously told them you were in oz etc. it seems a ridiculous question but when we came to oz we applied for jobs when we got there as luckily we had spare cash to fund this, the way back though this isn't possible! Plan is I go back first then hubby follows....if he comes at all....

Totally with you!! I hate hate hate it!! For a start it turns my 2 year old feral & makes me crazy!! Plus this rental has no air con & it's going to be 40c at the weekend.FML

Safe trip & hope you have a good 2 weeks holiday!!! Xx

I'm with first direct, yes part of the HSBC group BUT all online, if you need to ring them internationally they are very efficient. & based in Leeds so no Indian call centres. We still pay part of our mortgage in the UK but hubby's wage didn't go in here in oz so they arranged an emergency overdraft for us. Best bank I've ever been with & I've used lloyds, Barclays, Halifax & HSBC

What area have you decided on @AuntAgatha? Luckily we still have our house but ill be living with the rents whilst I get the house ship shape as my tenant is a bit crap but at least he pays his rent!

Totally agree quoll I've come back & it been 35c today & it's bloody horrible just 22 weeks to go!

I'm still here, fly back Tuesday & I hear what you are saying espesh driving!! Being back this time has cemented my decision that home is the place to be. Had a cracking latte with a homemade cheese scone under a fiver in dobbies i was with my mam getting plants lol)

Well you KNOW where I'm going Aunt Agatha lol! But end April 2015 to the North Tyne Valley in Northumberland, near kielder forest. Will be looking for jobs before I go, house is sorted as we never managed to sell it! Yes it's not ideal as its small but it's ours & my parents own farms so maybe in the future we will move into one of the farmhouses. I'm thinking hubby may stay on until end of the tax year but we will be looking for jobs for him to. Childcare is sorted as both sets of parents are nearby as well as a decent nursery & great schools!! I'm looking forward to going back to oz for my 'holiday' in the knowledge that I'm coming back!! Happy happy

To the OP...good luck, I would imagine you merely came onto here to say what you were thinking & ask a little advice etc. you know your family & what is best for you personally. I can't stand it when we (people wanting to mbttuk) post on here then get shite for wanting to mbttuk?! Surely this is the place to post?!? Anyway that's my rant over, good luck & enjoy whatever life brings ?

I was 5 weeks pregnant when I first arrived in 2012..unplanned! Anyway I was expecting triplets & got the most amazing care through the public system. Didn't pay a thing. Unfortunately there were complications but due to the care I had by an amazing British consultant I had one healthy baby (albeit in the UK!...another story) but my first 22 weeks of care were in oz

Yey!!!!!!!!!! Fantastic news!! Def need to meet up with you & @caramac when I return for good too!! Ive loved being back home & the Tyne valley is where I belong!

I do feel relieved tbh!! Definitely aunt agatha!!!

Well of course!!!!! Maybe potential babysitting duty ?

Thanks folks for your advice

Hi melza, yes that was the ideal option, he says he will return & I know he will. I know I've compromised a lot but this is what I've got to do.