Reasons why you moved back to the UK?

[alandeej]

It may seem strange to start a thread in moving back to the UK, when I'm looking to move to Australia.

We are looking to move to Perth WA, my mother still calls it her home and would jump at the chance to go back as she was brought up there, we also have family living in Perth. I have the opportunity of a lifetime, in my opinion, to move to with sponsored 457 visa. I feel if I do not take this I will regret it for the rest of my life even if things don't work out, my wife and children are ALL looking forward to going, especially as we tried to move to France in 2007 and loved it, the only problem was the language and work but we loved the French way of life.

My reason for posting is not everyone settles in Australia and many return home, indeed as we have lived in Cornwall for many years we have seen people move from London, for example, don't like the Cornish lifestyle and move back. I would like to know the main reason why those who have chosen to move back did so?

The main reason appears to be missing family and being isolated so far away, the sublime to ridiculous reasons like missing M & S and Boots!

[Guest chris955]

Peoples reasons for moving back to the UK are many and varied. For some it is purely and simply homesickness, for others it is family and friends or that they just don't feel settled.

For us personally it comes down to a few things, most of my family is here and my wifes has no immediate family back in the UK so the family aspect is out of the equation. We have many fantastic friends that we made in our time in the UK years ago, these are friends we have never been able to find here so that is important to us. I have been offered an extremely good business opportunity which we would be crazy to turn down so that's a major factor for us. Our kids love the idea of living in a village in England, they have been twice and arent really sporty outdoors types and avoid the heat.

We both love the English countryside, buildings, humour and all the usual stuff.

I grew up here so I dont have Aussie rose tinted glasses in so far as I dont have these preconceived ideas of what things are apparently like here, I have lived it.

Dont get me wrong, Australia can be a great place to live if it ticks the right boxes, for us it doesn't.

Lots of people love Perth, it does nothing for me, it's too isolated but many others take that as a positive.

People go home for as many reasons as people come here for.

[Guest guest37336]

Hi Alandeej.

 

Ready. Homesickness, not the land of milk and honey, careers, family, friends, cheap lemons, Coronation Street, money, seasons, snow, trees, traffic, bird swoop, beaches, flies, internet, blah, blah, blah.

 

Wasn't being flippant AD, but in all honesty there are SO many reasons that to list them all would be an impossible task. Some reasons to some seem bloody ridiculous, some valid, each to their own I say matey, (within reason) but I do feel as though you are asking a question which 'could' ultimately influence you BEFORE you arrive.

 

We are all different and view the 'journey' differently. Personally I love Australia and to list the things I love would take a life time, but I would bet my bottom dollar that those same things 'may' well be on your 'future' dislike list, as I said we are all different and react differently.

 

Try not to pre-empt the move too much with opinion that is at times based in fact and at other times based on fiction.

 

I don't like the expression AD, but suck it and see comes to mind. The journey is one huge jump and ONLY YOU can make a reasoned and educated decision based on YOUR particular experiences.

 

Hope that didn't come across as negative my friend, but the only way of finding out if Australia is for you is to go and experience the country and people FIRST HAND.

 

Cheers Tony.:wink:

[Guest The Ropey HOFF]

I agree with Tony on this, we are all different, some might feel its right straight away, some might not like it at first and want to come back, but as time passes Australia grows on them, some don't like it from the off. Until you are there its impossible what you will feel and think and just because it hasn't worked out for some, doesn't mean it won't work out for others. If you have really strong family ties and live in each others pockets, i can imagine it is harder to settle and if your relationship is shaky, i think that could make things difficult, but like i say ............ we are all different and until we are there, who knows how we will react, but your lucky like us, if it doesn't work out, you can always come back to the uk, a country that still has a lot to offer. Best of luck and ......... we all worry about this.

[Quoll]

For me it would be about the feeling of belonging. Australia just doesnt tick my boxes any more. First 10 years were fun, second 10 were the ho hum get on with it, bring up the kids years and the last 10 have been the "get me out of here" years. Now into my fourth decade the feeling of entrapment is dominant (my least worst option) and that doesnt help my equanimity at all. It doesnt offer me any of the things I wanted to do with my life in my older years (history, culture, countryside, variety, mellow, green etc). I think a lot of people do struggle to "settle" here but as the years go by the get desensitized and ultimately lose the opportunity to move on for a range of reasons.

 

I'm all for taking opportunities when they arise but doing it with a belt and braces approach - dont burn any bridges in the process and ultimately only gamble what you are prepared to lose. Have a series of decision points where you make choices based on your best options at the moment - once you get your kids into education the world changes and you lose some of your freedom.

 

Perth wouldnt float my boat - too isolated for me too. A lot of people wouldnt choose Canberra but for me it is one of the better places to live if you have to live anywhere here - each to their own really.

[Conniebygaslight]

To be honest I think when people talk about missing M&S & Boots it's slightly misconstrude. What Australia lacks for us is choice...this borne out of the fact that country is so vast and the population is so small. (I believe the entire population is the same as that live within the m25) The affect this has on products/services and subsequently mindset is incredible. The infrastructure simply isn't there as there aren't enough people to warrant it and therefore the choice for many things is affected. We struggled with the attitude that people just accept the little choice they have and that they pay a premium for things. We struggled with the fact that you are pretty much are where you settle and to go anywhere else is both time consuming and costly. This ambivalence then falls into education and banking and internet and health etc and for us it became just too hard. We moan here in the UK (as I believe this is part of our culture...and sometimes we moan too much) but the Australian way seems to be they all are happy because the sun is shining...which is a great way to live if you don't know any different. We feel so much more alive here in the UK as the diversity of scenery alone is something to be marvelled at. The accessibility here is fantastic too,we can and do go to many theatres, concerts, museams, theme parks, country side etc

 

The 'Poms in Paradise' that is portrayed at the moment is something that I cannot understand, I find it staggering that the TV makers are trying to sell Australia by showing a bunch of people having a pool party as 'living the dream'...that may be great for some (not our bag) but even so...after that what else is there....beach, champagne, bush walks.....then what..?

 

Some people love it for some it's merely a superficial veneer that offers nothing....not everyone leaves Australia because they miss friends and family some just don't like it.

 

There are of course many that do and no two people are the same....I have friends that love it....I have friends that hate it...I have friends that pretend to love it......I have many friends that are here in the UK and think Oz must be paradise....it's up to you to decide what is best for you....no amount of visiting will help really, only living there will....if your life improves there then great....if not then there's no shame in coming home.

[ali]

It may seem strange to start a thread in moving back to the UK, when I'm looking to move to Australia.

We are looking to move to Perth WA, my mother still calls it her home and would jump at the chance to go back as she was brought up there, we also have family living in Perth. I have the opportunity of a lifetime, in my opinion, to move to with sponsored 457 visa. I feel if I do not take this I will regret it for the rest of my life even if things don't work out, my wife and children are ALL looking forward to going, especially as we tried to move to France in 2007 and loved it, the only problem was the language and work but we loved the French way of life.

My reason for posting is not everyone settles in Australia and many return home, indeed as we have lived in Cornwall for many years we have seen people move from London, for example, don't like the Cornish lifestyle and move back. I would like to know the main reason why those who have chosen to move back did so?

The main reason appears to be missing family and being isolated so far away, the sublime to ridiculous reasons like missing M & S and Boots!

 

Not strange at all, before we migrated we sought out posts of why people returned, it gave us food for thought and we discussed what would happen if that happened for us or we felt that way. In those days PIO was so much smaller and not a lot of people were in Oz - now the site has grown so too have the stories of why people are thinking of going back. Some you'll be able to relate to and others you won't, sometimes it's the little things that can 'trip you up' on your adventure.

 

I would like to add for all posters in this thread please follow the examples that have been expressed andrespect any of the posters comments as their own situation and feeling. It might not be the same as your own but that doesn't make it wrong.

[Guest famousfive]

Our reasons for returning later in the year are simple and yet complex at the same time.First off,after living here a few times before both with kids and without[my OH is an aussie]we pretty much knew what to expect.Homesickness has not been a problem for us and for that we are thankful because it can have an awful effect on people.

The thing is we don't like it here.We have moved on in life and find our lives here lacking and dull.One of the things that my OH struggles with is the acceptance of people,they just make do because that's the way it is here.I find the attitude of people we have met as very insular and I would like my kids to have a more outward view on life.

These are reasons personal to us and for some these examples are what they like about oz.We will not return to ireland with a story of woe about oz but will tell people the truth of our experience and an honest answer will be that we found it dull and uninspiring.

I think these stories of why people return can be a big eyeopener but by no means should you let them cloud your journey because chances are you will get here and love it.Many do love it,many hate it and for some it can just be the lesser of two evils.We all see through different eyes I suppose.

[Northernpommy]

Hi,

Good post and interesting replies.

 

TBH there are a number of questions to be asked I believe before you go back.

 

1. Why did we leave the UK in the first place (when you are away from the UK you forget about the problems with opportunities, jobs, imigrations and so on

2. Is it Australia that you havent settled into or is it just the city you are in. Reading the comments above, one person mentions they miss theatre and things to do, countryside etc, well in Melbourne you get all that.! AND the seasons, coronation street and so much more. However, for us, we want the Oz lifestyle, the beaches, the weather and so on, so we are heading to Perth soon.

3. You HAVE to give yourself two years to decide if its right. When we first arrived here, if someone had given me a plane ticket to go back then I would have grabbed it. Now I really wouldnt go back.!

 

In life you have to take chances and take opportunities as given to you or live with the regrets later. If you can afford to take the hit financially if doesnt work out then dont look back.

 

On the positive note, there are so many more brits come to Oz and settle than come here and return.!! By far.!

 

Hope you enjoy your new life in Oz.

[Guest chris955]

It isnt a competition between how many come and how many go back. As has been said there are numerous reasons why people go home and obviously someone who is happy here probably struggles to understand.

I grew up here and when we came back 12 years ago we decided to try Brisbane instead of Geelong were I spent most of my early life, that was a very good decision as I wouldnt live in Geelong again for a bucket full of money. Now after 12 years the gloss has well and truly worn off life in Brisbane FOR US, not for everyone of course.

When people say they miss seasons, theatre, countryside I think they mean they miss the specific Biritsh version of those things not something similar.

[Guest Sancha2]

My reason for posting is not everyone settles in Australia and many return home, indeed as we have lived in Cornwall for many years we have seen people move from London, for example, don't like the Cornish lifestyle and move back. I would like to know the main reason why those who have chosen to move back did so?

The main reason appears to be missing family and being isolated so far away, the sublime to ridiculous reasons like missing M & S and Boots!

 

We have been here 11 years and we came from a quiet life in Dorset. We have loved some things here and have had fun over the years but for us now we are going home mainly for family as we have non here but also friendships are not the same in many ways life here has been boring. My sister came over years ago and i was showing of the beaches parks shops and the Ozzie way of life, she said to me its lovely but you have no one to share it all with so wheres the fun in that. It was so true it was always just us.

In saying that we are glad that we came here we think its great that our kids can live here if they choose to and there are many good things about here also. I think if you family here that will help and if you come over as a few years plan and not sell everything you have in the UK then you can't go wrong.

Good Luck

[Quoll]

Hi,

Good post and interesting replies.

 

TBH there are a number of questions to be asked I believe before you go back.

 

1. Why did we leave the UK in the first place (when you are away from the UK you forget about the problems with opportunities, jobs, imigrations and so on

2. Is it Australia that you havent settled into or is it just the city you are in. Reading the comments above, one person mentions they miss theatre and things to do, countryside etc, well in Melbourne you get all that.! AND the seasons, coronation street and so much more. However, for us, we want the Oz lifestyle, the beaches, the weather and so on, so we are heading to Perth soon.

3. You HAVE to give yourself two years to decide if its right. When we first arrived here, if someone had given me a plane ticket to go back then I would have grabbed it. Now I really wouldnt go back.!

 

In life you have to take chances and take opportunities as given to you or live with the regrets later. If you can afford to take the hit financially if doesnt work out then dont look back.

 

On the positive note, there are so many more brits come to Oz and settle than come here and return.!! By far.!

 

Hope you enjoy your new life in Oz.

 

I think it is naive to expect that everyone left the UK to escape from something - many of us didnt leave as much as move on to some other opportunity. Maybe if we had been escaping then Australia may be better than what we have left.

 

If you like the watered down version of theatre, seasons, variety (and I never watch Corrie!) then, sure Aus isnt that bad. Have you ever tried to see Judi Dench (or the fabulous Rufus Sewell, more to the point) on stage every night for a long season in Aus? Or found a castle with a thousand years of visible history at the end of your street? Or been able to walk through bluebell woods and pick cowslips (naughty!) or see a hedgerow bursting with different colours with different seasons in Aus? It is different - John Bell does a reasonable Shakespeare for a fortnight twice a year, walking through mile upon mile of bark drop with insignificant little callistemon or grevillea doesnt do it for me, neither does a "sacred site" with a few grinding stones - my DH thinks differently and that's OK for him (he's happy in the garden with his permaculture and his chooks - I want more out of life!)

 

Personally the Aus lifestyle does absolutely bugger all for me. I went to the beach for the first time in years in December with DS1 who was here on his holidays. Half an hour of being fried to a frizzle and I was ready to go. Surprisingly, he lasted a couple of hours before he said "lets go" - I went prepared for longer. I get more out of life in Aus sitting in front of my computer working on the family tree or researching work or catching up with work notes or watching the telly and knitting than I do going outside.

 

I actually think a lot of people get desensitized, especially those who have had difficulty settling and they use cognitive dissonance to bolster their feelings that this is the best place since sliced bread. I do wonder, having talked to many very long term expats, how long the gloss lasts. Many, like me, were fine in their early days but I have spoken to a lot of older ones who would move on to UK if they could but are financially, emotionally or socially trapped here (Canberra brought in a lot of UK public servants in the 70s so there are quite a few of my generation or older). I dont think there is anything magical about the two years and for some people they have to make decisions quicker than that - usually if they have kids of HS age and need to repair the damage done to their educational prospects.

 

Migration is a fluid thing and there are a load of young Aussies leaving every year to see the world, many never return (ds1, case in point along with one of his one time flat mates and a couple of his school friends who also had dual citizenship) because they find their lives so much fuller and varied over there, so it works both ways.

 

I think it is disingenuous to suppose that people contemplating a better life in UK arent aware of the pitfalls - Australia has them too, so we arent totally stupid!

[Guest Scotinaus]

I think it can depend a lot of the networks (social and support) you build when you get here... if you don't end up with close friends then it could feel very lonely here, and I understand that people in that situation would want to perhaps go back home...

 

We are likely heading back for career opportunities.... being closer to our family and friends will be brilliant of course, but we would not be moving back to the same towns as they are in, and don't want to make our big life decisions based on other people. This may change if and when our parents get older, get ill, etc but at the moment all is well, and our parents visit us in Oz regularly (which I know makes us very lucky).

 

Our current plan is to move back for at least two years and then reassess. We will likely have kids then (we don't now) so imagine a lot of things will have changed and we may have different priorities at that time.

 

I do miss M&S undies but get them shipped over!! :-)

[amandamc28]

Really interesting to read all the replies. We have decided to return to UK after 3 years here in Melbourne, when I booked the flights it felt very final and I did not feel the same excitement when I booked flights to come here, this was because two of my children are not keen to return. My OH and I have thought long and hard and the decision has not been easy. We mainly missed family and friends and we are finding it harder to cope with the cost of living here. The education system was I suppose top of the list, the difference between private and state schools. I love the scenery here, but I felt you were always observing the scenery from your car because it is so vast and you never seem to be able to walk through the scenery (I know there are some lovely designated bush walks but you always have to drive there! ) Have made some great Aussie friends and many have been helpful when we arrived, but always found sense of humour is different. I can fully understand why people choose to say and every family is different, we have had a great time and I now feel a weight has been lifted and I can be myself again!!

[Conniebygaslight]

Hi,

Good post and interesting replies.

 

TBH there are a number of questions to be asked I believe before you go back.

 

1. Why did we leave the UK in the first place (when you are away from the UK you forget about the problems with opportunities, jobs, imigrations and so on

2. Is it Australia that you havent settled into or is it just the city you are in. Reading the comments above, one person mentions they miss theatre and things to do, countryside etc, well in Melbourne you get all that.! AND the seasons, coronation street and so much more. However, for us, we want the Oz lifestyle, the beaches, the weather and so on, so we are heading to Perth soon.

3. You HAVE to give yourself two years to decide if its right. When we first arrived here, if someone had given me a plane ticket to go back then I would have grabbed it. Now I really wouldnt go back.!

 

In life you have to take chances and take opportunities as given to you or live with the regrets later. If you can afford to take the hit financially if doesnt work out then dont look back.

 

On the positive note, there are so many more brits come to Oz and settle than come here and return.!! By far.!

 

Hope you enjoy your new life in Oz.

 

I totally disagree that you have to give it 2 years...I know 2 families who have been there at least 6 years and still hate it.

 

Not everyone moves to Oz because they dislike the UK...so this 'remember why you left in the first place' attitude will not apply to all. We moved to Aus to be near family not to leave the UK.

 

Moving states would have been pointless to us for the family reasons above.

 

I agree that Melbourne offers Theates etc...but when You've exhausted Melbourne then what.....?

 

I understand that you are happy and overcame your doubts but telling people you HAVE to give it 2 years is completely unrealistic.....not only could it be disastrous if your kids are then too settled and/or behind at school...it's also a long time to be very unhappy.

 

I think the answer is...there simply isn't one....merely experiences that, good or bad are very real to each individual.

[Conniebygaslight]

I think it is naive to expect that everyone left the UK to escape from something - many of us didnt leave as much as move on to some other opportunity. Maybe if we had been escaping then Australia may be better than what we have left.

 

If you like the watered down version of theatre, seasons, variety (and I never watch Corrie!) then, sure Aus isnt that bad. Have you ever tried to see Judi Dench (or the fabulous Rufus Sewell, more to the point) on stage every night for a long season in Aus? Or found a castle with a thousand years of visible history at the end of your street?

 

 

 

I don't watch Soaps either Quoll.....I love Judi Dench too, I also love panto for the kids, Elton John, Take That, Michael Mcintyre, Julie Walters and a whole range of others. I also like to have a choice of venues and shows and decide which one would suit us best at the time. The choice here is something that Australia simply cannot compete with...and never will.

[Conniebygaslight]

I think it is naive to expect that everyone left the UK to escape from something - many of us didnt leave as much as move on to some other opportunity. Maybe if we had been escaping then Australia may be better than what we have left.

 

If you like the watered down version of theatre, seasons, variety (and I never watch Corrie!) then, sure Aus isnt that bad. Have you ever tried to see Judi Dench (or the fabulous Rufus Sewell, more to the point) on stage every night for a long season in Aus? Or found a castle with a thousand years of visible history at the end of your street?

 

 

 

I don't watch Soaps either Quoll.....I love Judi Dench too, I also love panto for the kids, Elton John, Take That, Michael Mcintyre, Julie Walters and a whole range of others. I also like to have a choice of venues and shows and decide which one would suit us best at the time. The choice here is something that Australia simply cannot compete with...and never will.

 

 

We also took the children to see the wonderful 'Moscow State Circus' the other week straigh form school- it took us half an hour and we live in a small village in 'the sticks' everywhere is accessible....