Jump to content

Help


Guest funkymonkey

Recommended Posts

Guest funkymonkey

Hi there, we are planning to move back to the UK early next year. Have sold the house, living in a rental at the moment in country WA (hubbie works in the wheatbelt). The exchange rate is brilliant and we have booked our rate....BUT...i am still having doubts about returning...the usual stuff..jobs, houses, will we settle, cost of living, lifestyle etc..

 

The main reason for returning is because i just haven't settled here after six years and think about my family and the UK every day..wondering what it would be like there. Just when i think i've made up my mind and feel happy about going back i then get the doubts again and wonder if i'm doing the right thing.

 

Australia is booming, low unemployment, good economic outlook and we have a very comfortable life here...the UK on the other hand has higher unemployment, the outlook doesn't seem to look so rosy and then there is the weather too:mad:. Are these good enough reasons to stay? How will i cope when i get older and then wish i had gone back?..life just seems very shallow and pretty boring here (hate using that word!)

 

My Hubbie is Australian and will return to the UK but would rather stay here. We have three young children and sometimes i just feel so alone and miss family terribly, but i also wonder if this is due to being at home with the children ( i have always worked and had a successful career before coming to Australia).

 

So, my dilema's are:

 

How much do you need to be earning in the UK to support 3 children, small mortgage hopefully and have a reasonable lifestyle?

 

Has anyone wanted to go back but stuck it out here because of the financial/lifestyle here but still missed family, if so how did you cope?

 

Anyone at home with children, how do you keep your mind occupied, what do you do to keep sane?

 

Anyone had all these doubts but still taken the leap and gone back and it was the best thing they ever did.

 

Sorry to go on, but just being torn in two by the decision.

 

Thanks

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest The Ropey HOFF

Hi funkymonkey

 

i am just bumping up your thread, which i think deserves some good replies with hopefully good help and advice.

 

You have given Australia a go and you deserve credit, but the pull of missing family is the single most reason as to why people come back to the uk and you don't need any other reason than this to come back.

 

The uk is struggling at the present, but it is still a great country to live in.

 

I take it you have citizenship, i know your husband and kids have it with him being Australian, so does this mean you have it automatically also?

 

You might come back for a couple of years and decide it isn't for you afterall and then return to Australia. Why don't you have a 2 or 3 year plan and as you say the exchange rate is massively in your favour coming this way back to the uk, but that itself tells you how each country is fairing financially.

 

Remember you are lucky that you can either live in the best country in the world, which is Australia, or live in arguably the second best country in the world, the uk.

 

Best of luck and stay positive.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

From reading the reports of people who have made the decision and then moved on to UK, I think they pretty much universally have the sort of feelings you are having. It's that sense of relief kicking in which then allows you to worry about something else. You are so lucky that your OH will go back with you and not trap you here and I am sure that things will turn out just fine as it seems to have done for pretty much all the folk who have moved on to UK in the recent past.

 

The alternative - feeling trapped here for the rest of your life - isnt a very comfortable feeling at all and will only get worse with time so an escape now is the best opportunity you have got and now is financially absolutely the best time there has been in the past several decades!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Having the choice of two countries is both a blessing and a curse really, isn't it? It may be that after some time away, you will see the UK with fresh eyes and appreciate all kinds of things you didn't when you lived there. The benefit of moving around is that you no longer take things for granted. I don't think it is an easy decision and there will be things you miss, a pull to the other country.

 

Things to do when home with kids... depends a bit on your interests but I am hoping to start an online study course soon. Some of the other ladies were talking about selling on ebay as a way to earn a little cash and do something that is not child focused. Going to the gym is a good outlet for me and most here have a good creche if you need it.

 

Most days I love being home with my little one but there are days when I find myself kneading the Playdo a bit firmer than is required - then I try to get out to a playgroup or park or see a friend. If I can't do that, I think up some completely silly activity to do with the little one so we can both let off steam. I got this activity from a tv show: get some large pieces of construction paper or similar and put them outside. Cut pieces of sponge (kitchen sponge does just fine) and soak them in poster paint. Put them on the paper and then get a spatula or fly swat etc, slam it down on the sponge. Very messy, hence being outside, but you get a nice effect and the slamming down on the sponges is quite satisfying :) Kids find that kind of physical art very entertaining and I liked it because it got me out of a routine rut one day.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest famousfive

I think it is natural to worry,a change after 6yrs is a big deal and takes just as much consideration and thought as the move here initially did.You have taken the major step of selling your house which itself is a time of worry and stress so don't beat yourself up about things,it is completly normal.

 

For what it's worth,I think you will be just fine in the UK.Yes,things are slow there at the moment but millions of people are still going about their lives,working,shopping,going on holidays etc as they always did.An optimistic view will often bring its rewards so try not to dwell on the worry.Research and prepare as best you can and fly off in the knowledge that Aus will always be here if you all decide to return.Make the most of the chance you have been given and try and be thankful that you are in a position to choose between both.Good luck to you all on the big upcoming adventure.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest guest30038

Anyone at home with children, how do you keep your mind occupied, what do you do to keep sane?

 

 

 

The number of children that I had in my home, I never had timne for my mind to think of anything else! :biglaugh:

 

I's now that they've left or are in school, that I am losing my sanity.............age, added to the fact that I've been on home duties for 15 yrs, and also that I have to do the school runs, rules out employment.

 

I try to keep myself busy with photography and fish-keeping but the lack of social intercourse sometimes drives me crazy.

 

good luck

 

kev

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest AndyandYvonneD
The number of children that I had in my home, I never had timne for my mind to think of anything else! :biglaugh:

 

I's now that they've left or are in school, that I am losing my sanity.............age, added to the fact that I've been on home duties for 15 yrs, and also that I have to do the school runs, rules out employment.

 

I try to keep myself busy with photography and fish-keeping but the lack of social intercourse sometimes drives me crazy.

 

good luck

 

kev

 

 

 

 

 

 

Social is all you get nowadays :jiggy:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest guest30038
Social is all you get nowadays :jiggy:

 

Agreed! :cry: :biglaugh:

 

It used to be called a "promise"............nowadays it's a threat :biglaugh:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi there, we are planning to move back to the UK early next year. Have sold the house, living in a rental at the moment in country WA (hubbie works in the wheatbelt). The exchange rate is brilliant and we have booked our rate....BUT...i am still having doubts about returning...the usual stuff..jobs, houses, will we settle, cost of living, lifestyle etc..

 

The main reason for returning is because i just haven't settled here after six years and think about my family and the UK every day..wondering what it would be like there. Just when i think i've made up my mind and feel happy about going back i then get the doubts again and wonder if i'm doing the right thing.

 

Australia is booming, low unemployment, good economic outlook and we have a very comfortable life here...the UK on the other hand has higher unemployment, the outlook doesn't seem to look so rosy and then there is the weather too:mad:. Are these good enough reasons to stay? How will i cope when i get older and then wish i had gone back?..life just seems very shallow and pretty boring here (hate using that word!)

 

My Hubbie is Australian and will return to the UK but would rather stay here. We have three young children and sometimes i just feel so alone and miss family terribly, but i also wonder if this is due to being at home with the children ( i have always worked and had a successful career before coming to Australia).

 

So, my dilema's are:

 

How much do you need to be earning in the UK to support 3 children, small mortgage hopefully and have a reasonable lifestyle?

 

Has anyone wanted to go back but stuck it out here because of the financial/lifestyle here but still missed family, if so how did you cope?

 

Anyone at home with children, how do you keep your mind occupied, what do you do to keep sane?

 

Anyone had all these doubts but still taken the leap and gone back and it was the best thing they ever did.

 

Sorry to go on, but just being torn in two by the decision.

 

Thanks

Me too have been torn by the decision, I think about moving home every day now we have made the decision but we are waiting out our citizenship which is still a year off and it drives me crazy thinking of another year. I think of ways and means to get me home earlier without having to wait!

I do like it here but long to be with my family again and miss them loads. We are in a great financial position here and will be returning to the unknown financially. To help us with this we are using our equity (when we sell the house) to buy houses hopefully 3 in the uk for rentals. We have just bought one.

The weather will be missed apart from summer when I find that so hot don't like it anymore enjoyed winter. I have become addicted to this site from all the people returning and those that have returned.

The exchange rate is fab at the moment and I hope I sell the house in time to get the good rate.

I work 3 days a week which is nice, my contract ends on 31 Dec I don't intend on going for another job will just help hubby out with his work to keep me going or return for the 90 days you are allowed to. If my husband and daughter said lets just go I would book them flights so quick to go asap can't stand another christmas here want to be in the big family christmas's which I enjoyed so much in the cold.

Its not long till you go it will pass quick and I am sure things will work themselves out for you, good luck and chin up x

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest punky pom

Hi there Funkymonkey, We have been here 6yrs too and have made the decision to go back for all the reasons you state. Australia is a wonderful country and I am sure there will be things we will miss,but at the end of the day friends and family are what matters. We too have citizenship so that if the children wanted to come back in the future they can or even ourselves. Whatever decision we make in life we always question it thats human nature. We have 3 children triplets actually when they were young I was lucky that in the UK there were heaps of activities and playgroups, mums and toddlers etc I made sure I went to a different one evryday and I made heaps of friends that way. It also helped with my sanity too. We emigrated to country Victoria and I remember opening the curtains on the first day and thinking my goodness what have we done. In 2008 we travelled around OZ in a caravan for 2yrs we picked up work along the way and the children did distance education. We had a ball and Australia is a beautiful diverse country but its not for us. I wish you luck in all your decisions and enjoy those children it wont belong before they are teenagers as are our 3 and then the fun begins. It maybe a struggle when you get back at first and it may not but just think what you have achieved you came here to Australia and you had 3 children they are huge achievements and you stayed ou didnt go back after a couple of months.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest funkymonkey

Thanks to everyone for your kind and supportive words.. I can descibe my feelings as standing on the edge of the highest diving board at the swimming pool and looking over the edge..I want to jump but the fear of will we sink or swim stops me. I guess i need to take a deep breath and jump and just pray that we all swim.

 

I worry about everything in the UK and then think once again, perhaps i can make it work here, perhaps i can try again and keep trying as i have done....but will it change, will the feeling you get when you open your eyes in the morning and realise where you are change...i don't know??

 

I have changed half of our money now and the pound is falling so if i changed it back we would lose out...hmmmm

 

Thanks again, we should start a support group for those returning to the UK!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks to everyone for your kind and supportive words.. I can descibe my feelings as standing on the edge of the highest diving board at the swimming pool and looking over the edge..I want to jump but the fear of will we sink or swim stops me. I guess i need to take a deep breath and jump and just pray that we all swim.

 

I worry about everything in the UK and then think once again, perhaps i can make it work here, perhaps i can try again and keep trying as i have done....but will it change, will the feeling you get when you open your eyes in the morning and realise where you are change...i don't know??

 

I have changed half of our money now and the pound is falling so if i changed it back we would lose out...hmmmm

 

Thanks again, we should start a support group for those returning to the UK!!

 

Hi there completely agree about the support group - returning can be hard in some ways but worth it in the long run - to connect with people who feel the same would be hugely re-assuring especially when family and friends cant really understand what you have been through no matter how hard they try.

 

How do we do that - just set up a new thread?? Any help moderators?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...