mrsindecision

OK so perhaps our frequent visits back and plan to launch a branch of my business out there might work??

Hi Quoll yes that's what I thought. Yes only for fun though this time not for serious. Would like to have the option in retirement to be able to be in both places. Kids very settled here so once grandkids come along I think I will be firmly back in UK. Love life here - but the weather! The winters are hard. If it doesn't work out then we'll get a holiday place in Spain. Are you OK?

We have a PR visa which was valid until 2012 - we returned to the UK in 2010 and got a 5-year RRV in Nov 12 - expiring in Nov 17. we have been back three times in last five years for one-month trips going again in April. We still want to go back on hols and possibly for a longer stint in the next 18 months - can we apply for an RRV again? Are we still technically Permanent Residents? Any advice or recommendations for lawyer that could advise. Also keen to do some business out there in next 18 months to pave the way to longer return, any recommendations as to who can help with business advice as well. Thanks

We are heading back to the Sunshine Coast for most of January to re-visit our friends and enjoy a holiday in what feels like our second home. Just wondered if anyone is coming back to UK for a holiday during that time that might want a house sitter or to rent out their home for two/three weeks to a couple of trustworthy PIOers? Please send me a PM if you are interested in discussing further or know of anyone who might be interested in talking to us? Thanks

We were in the same boat even though OH NHS worker - my self employment an issue. Most lenders want at least two if not three years books. We rented for two years and made sure financial year end for accounts was linked to return date (i.e we came back in June - financial year July-June to maximise time for accounts). We went with our own bank in the end (Yorkshire Bank) who are part of NAB group and therefore were willing to include my Aussie accounts in reckoning. They wouldn't lend us the full amount we wanted but we have just topped it up as my year end just finished and now have 3 years UK accounts. Don't think there is a way around it without paying outrageous interest rates. However important to weight up the final costs as in 6 months of having a mortgage we have paid 10k off the capital - we had two years of rent that went nowhere except into landlords' pocket. So might be more cost effective to take higher interest rate just don't tie yourself in for too long.

3 years on Sunshine Coast, back in UK 3 years, some but few regrets. Kids all thriving here with education and opportunities. Have had plenty of work since returning and this year started my own limited company and loving it, OH back in NHS, some grumbles but being funded for a Masters and actually his job is much better here than in Oz. We loved the adventure of going to Oz and keep strong ties with all our friends there (my oz girlfriends just came for three week UK tour including the Chelsea Flower Show - they loved it). We are just renovating an old bungalow in quite an Aussie style including all the things we loved about our aussie house - laundry, walk ins, open plan kitchen, living, diner. We don't want to lose what we gained from our travels and still think of Oz as a second home. Going back in Jan for a holiday to celebrate my 50th with our friends. We have travelled loads since coming back to UK - USA, NZ, Thailand, Italy, France, Spain could never have afforded that in Oz. You can get a weekend in Europe for £150 - you can't beat that. We are trying to work out a way of having the best of both worlds - 3 months there (oz) and 9 months here (uk) and could see that shifting the other way as we get to retire but loved that we did it and loved that we came back.

more to this one than meets the eye, but she didn't ask him to leave her for someone half his age with no-one out there to support her with young children and then have the courts take their passports. The mature thing would be to resolve marital issues first and consider best interests of all involved and not be so flattered by a young girls attention that you screw up all their lives. Sorry to rant but if this had happened to me I would have been devastated. She is devastated and powerless. When we went out I was staggered at how the women loved my husband - he got so much attention from Ozzie ladies because of his accent - he was oblivious to most of it and it wasn't as issue for us _ i thought it was quite sweet for him (knowing my OH is a decent bloke) I used to get him to negotiate discounts in the electrical store where the saleswoman was clearly smitten - he did great! But for some men with less secure marriages the temptation is too much. The key issue is marital problems follow you anyway and if there are any skeletons in the cupboard a move this big often bring them out - so be prepared.

This was my biggest fear when we were in oz that my kids would want to stay and I would be trapped forever. I would have adapted but it wouldn't have been my choice. Fortunately they loved their time in oz but are flourishing back in uk. I miss the beauty and wish oz had been better than it is but reality is what we need to live with. The thing about the kids is so important - have friends who went out- he had an affair(Ozzie girls love the accent) they split up - now he has refused permission for her to take kids home not even for a visit she's well and truly trapped. You don't think it would happen to you but you don't know.

Thanks everyone for your honest replies has helped me get some perspective - truth is oh never been happy wherever we have been. me and kids more settled types - I could have been more settled in ozif he was but the fact is he wasn't and he wanted to be indoors watching tv made me furious - i couldnt understand why we moved there for that - i didnt mind in uk because I had a life , friends, hobbies, work , good social life which he joined in so we had a balance we also enjoyed our evenings home cooking and chilling- when we lived in uk oh did more ( diving on holiday etc) in oz he didn't want to do anything - no boatin, fishin, campin, was all odd. I used to go to the beach on my own - all the while I had given up the things in the uk I loved to do this with him so you can imagine how frustrated I was. Now I am getting back into life here busy with work which is going great guns - professional business making good money - back in the zone with my bezzies, travelling Europe and uk etc. new hobbies. OH doing great at work, also on film sets on the side which he loves, cooking up a storm, doing a masters and time to chill and watch his tv - but still unhappy and pining for oz. We haven't found a house yet - too fussy and don't want to lose any money - but our rental is lovely and feels like home. I know he is going to hanker forever - I guess that's down to him not me. You are so right about kids have decided to let my son fly and give him my blessing and keep everything crossed we will be ok Thanks F

Because we moved to oz with three kids I was lucky that they all came back with us. My middle one was adamant about coming back to the Uk at 18 - now he's 20 and has been back to Oz to see all of his friends on a visit - he loved it again and I think is now planning to return. Also my husband has not settled since we came back - but was equally ( in fact more) unsettled there. I am just about over this nagging connection with Australia that I think will be with me forever. Would I feel so bad about my son if we had never gone and he went backpacking? Will my husband ever settle here without resenting something about being back. Although it was a fabulous experience there are times when I wish we had never bothered. Any words of insight - anyone else got the same stuff happening?

Hi Connie, got to agree, last summer I thought was great, started early and stayed relatively warm and dry for a long time. This wet has gone on too long. Having said that I was coming home from London on the train yesterday and saw the Thames in Maidenhead and it couldn't have looked more beautiful. Low mist, willows hanging and a rower on the still water. Wish I had a camera and could have captured it - made me appreciate the variety.

Been home nearly 2 years and have had two holidays with all our ozzie mates in that time. So here goes: I miss The sunshine The beach Boost juice (although they are starting to come here) Iced chocolate Having a pool (although this is not a reality miss because all my husband did was curse about cleaning the bloody thing and no one using it - nice pond) Clean wide streets THE PIES (seriously they are lovely in Oz - not sausage rolls I must add - you can't beat Gregg's or the cornish pasty shop). Watching the birds fly in over our lake at the end of the day Sydney Being adventurous Don't miss: Loud mouth aussies (sorry please don't take offence if you are not a loud mouth - just been to Thailand and was reminded of this type of aussie - much like those brits in south of spain) Bland conversation ( again sorry no offence but from my perspective English conversation is the thing I love the most) Woollies closing at 5pm on a Saturday and poor choice Expensive everything The bugs (uk is big free compared to qld) Feeling so alone The dark evenings all year round The crap telly Tyrannical bosses Love about UK: Countryside and dog walking culture - friendly, chatty, beautiful. Pubs Restaurants (variety and quality) London - an amazing city Normal service - not gushy just genuinely helpful Fashion!! Choice Europe Telly Cool weather Boots Free tickets for BBC shows The education Feeling alive Middle class people ( I know awfully snobby - but very polite, helpful and on the whole funny and interesting) Light evenings Hate about Uk gum on the streets arrogant rudeness kids who are aggressive chavs shitty housing estates moaning Good to map it out - can see I have made the right choice.

coming back is like starting again and agree with earlier posts that you have to treat it as a new stage - one friend of mine is treating it like another ex-pat posting. I do love England and the humour etc. It is true you don't always fit back in friends have moved on and also don't realise just how lost you are feeling. So you need to re-calibrate your thinking and approach it with new eyes. I personally wouldn't have come back if one of us didn't have a job and have good funds to set us back up again - important to get this in order. South East Pretty good from where I am sitting - I am so busy with work it's crazy but I am in the right trade at the right time. House prices still high and we are fussy - so still haven't found a home to call our own, having said that renting a lovely house so all good. I have had to face empty nest as well coming back as older kids off to uni so where my life was full of cooking and teenage dramas I am now a bit lost in the evenings - can feel an evening class coming on. At least we have choice here. Good luck xx

:hug: you're right this forum can give so much comfort when you are feeling like a fish out of water. Hopefully once you and the kids get settled and meet a few people it would help. Perhaps you should post on the meet ups section and see if there are any gatherings locally - take a deep breath and join in - you might meet some like minded people. Also why don't you tell yourself you are there for a few years and try to enjoy the adventure knowing at some point in the future you will come home. Also don't beat yourself up for not feeling settled - its a bit thing you have done - so well done for giving it a go. All the best and keep in touch on here so you know you are not on your own.

like your thinking although always been a bit of a dweller so hard to break the habits of a lifetime, although often my dwelling on things allows me to find a solution - so hoping that will arrive soon. Thanx