Emotional Outburst

[Guest]

We've been in Perth 18 months and live near Freo which I love, my job couldn't have worked out better, I can pretty much work the hours I choose, don't have to work school holidays and have been given a temporary promotion which is likely to become permanent. Our son who is now almost 7 is in an amazing school which he is very happy at, although he is very reluctant to admit anything about Australia is better. My OH is not happy at work and he feels demotivated and deskilled, he was trapped for a while as we came out on a 457 but we now have PR. He is applying for other jobs but nothing is happening and he is considering a complete change of career. We were affluent in the UK but came out with very little as we had moved not long before we decided to emigrate and had little equity in our house due to the downturn. We have a small house rented out there and due to a very incompetant agent have ended up with tenants who are not paying rent and cannot easily be evicted (they are 'residential occupiers' or in other words squatters). This is one of many stresses. We have started building and the financial strain is getting to us, the process wasn't properly explained and is also progressing much faster than we expected. Our rent was due last Thursday and OH forgot to pay, he paid on Tuesday when I reminded him, today we got an eviction notice giving 7 days to move out! It says if the rent is paid no further action will be taken so I expect it will be okay but it just felt like the final straw and I had an emotional outburst declaring I was getting the next plane to Scotland! I am not homesick I am just fed up with the relentless battle to get settled. Although OH brought us here I think he regrets it and our son is obsessed with Scotland even though I wonder how much he can remember. None of us really have the kind of friends we had in Scotland even though we only lived there five years. I guess I don't know whether to battle on or explore the option of moving back. I do think life is better here but it's tough going.

[Guest Spindy]

Hi Jules Just from reading your story and still being in the UK myself I would say battle on ...I hope things pick up for your OH.

[Guest rayman1]

We moved back from Brisbane aftre 5 months. It was a struggle settling and in the end decided that Australia wouldn't give us anything more than the UK apart from the heat and financial hardship. Been back about 4 weeks and have settled back lovely. Will take awhile to get back the lifestyle we once enjoyed (we were comfortable financially too) but it is so more achievable over here and we are all so glad to be back in Yorkshire.

Good luck and do support each other .

[ali]

Sounds like you've had one of those weeks Jules when everything that can go wrong has. Where are you building? We were talking about friends last night and how it's probably taken us 3.5 years to feel that we have a similar friendship group to the one we had in the UK (we're not party animals and have a very limited social life so it's taken a while lol). Feeling deskilled is an awful feeling, I've felt that myself and it makes you really unhappy.

[keily]

aww jules ....sounds like ur just havin a run of bad luck at the mo .....but ask yourself this ....up until this point was everything going okai ??? .....no one said this journey would be easy ...and jesus they were right ....but would goin back solve the problems ...or just create more ?? .....hope it all falls into place for you and your family :hug:

mrs keily

[Guest]

Sounds like you've had one of those weeks Jules when everything that can go wrong has. Where are you building? We were talking about friends last night and how it's probably taken us 3.5 years to feel that we have a similar friendship group to the one we had in the UK (we're not party animals and have a very limited social life so it's taken a while lol). Feeling deskilled is an awful feeling, I've felt that myself and it makes you really unhappy.

 

It feels like everything has been going wrong for at least six months, none of it is 'Australia' rather our decision to abandon everything we know for more unknowns than we could imagine. If it could go wrong it has!

 

As I said to OH we have to see the house build through and after that things should settle down anyway, I don't think we'd really gain that much moving back. If anything it'd be another 18 months disruption!

[Guest]

aww jules ....sounds like ur just havin a run of bad luck at the mo .....but ask yourself this ....up until this point was everything going okai ??? .....no one said this journey would be easy ...and jesus they were right ....but would goin back solve the problems ...or just create more ?? .....hope it all falls into place for you and your family :hug:

mrs keily

 

I read Ali's reply before yours and my reply to her would reply to you too. We knew it wouldn't be easy, we talked about '5 years of stress' but knowing it and living it are different things!

 

My skills aren't in so much demand in Scotland, I'd find work easily enough but couldn't call the shots as I can here OH still wouldn't know what he wants to do & I reckon the wee man would finally decide Australia is better!

 

Onwards and upwards, I just got sick of coping with it all but picnic is packed, wine chilled and we're off to celebrate the laying of the slab! And I'll try not to think of the $25k they want for it that we don't have!

[emmaroo]

Hi Julie

 

Sorry to hear things are a bit rough just now but persevere as if the torries get into govt then Scotland is finished!

 

stay strong

 

Emma

[Guest]

Hi Julie

 

Sorry to hear things are a bit rough just now but persevere as if the torries get into govt then Scotland is finished!

 

stay strong

 

Emma

 

Yeah, I did comment yesterday if I hadn't emigrated I would now! Friends are threatening to join me here!

[BuddysMum]

Aww you sound so stressed and you do seem to have had a pretty awful run.

 

No-one is walking in your shoes so we can't possibly say whether you should go or stay. The best we can do is reflect our own feelings about Australia!! However, I think your last post seems to be indicating that you do really want to stay.

 

I really hope that your OH can find a better job for himself, and that things really will settle down once the building finishes.

 

All the things you have given up in Scotland are things you thought would be worth it before, so just stick it out and see how you feel once the dust has settled.

 

We have been struggling to find decent jobs and are mainly surviving on our equity, but we still think it was worth it, and talking to many who came over on the £10 ticket, we don't feel we have anything to complain about. The conditions they moved to were often awful and they had little or no hope of returning.

[Guest Clairey b]

Hi Jules,

 

Hopefully this run of bad luck will now mean you have a run of good luck! I know what you mean though, sometimes just seems one thing after another, but i will keep everything crossed that things turn around for you all now!!

 

Take care,

Claire x

[Mongrel]

Jules your oh is going thro the same **** i have gone thro and still do , the guy in it i think , tell him to go with the flow i`ve got steel quals safety quals that mean jack **** , but i go and do the job clock out , have you a mortgage did you not know bout the payments slab ,plate height etc , them cedar homes are not cheap , but if you have a mortgage you pay as you build , stick in there , if thats what you want , tell your old man to go and get rat arsed ( eg me lkast friday) helps for me now and then . Not being a nego , but hes lookin at negas not like tescos etc . Go with the flow girl as its in the gbttuk forum you are seriously thinkin bout it

 

Mally

 

Walkabout completed

[Guest]

Jules your oh is going thro the same **** i have gone thro and still do , the guy in it i think , tell him to go with the flow i`ve got steel quals safety quals that mean jack **** , but i go and do the job clock out , have you a mortgage did you not know bout the payments slab ,plate height etc , them cedar homes are not cheap , but if you have a mortgage you pay as you build , stick in there , if thats what you want , tell your old man to go and get rat arsed ( eg me lkast friday) helps for me now and then . Not being a nego , but hes lookin at negas not like tescos etc . Go with the flow girl as its in the gbttuk forum you are seriously thinkin bout it

 

Mally

 

Walkabout completed

 

Thanks Mally, we're not looking at moving back I guess I was contemplating whether we should but I know that's irrational! Each of the things we're trying to deal with could be a post itself so I was a bit scant on detail (& my post was still long enough!)

 

The problem with the payments to Cedar is due to crappy advise from 123Home loans (name & shame), we were up front and said we had no deposit but with the lure of FHOG of $14k wondered what we could do. We were told we could use $14k as deposit plus we'd get back the stamp duty paid on the land of around $10k so we'd need to find $6k. The first disaster that struck was 'mortgage fees' of around $7k suddenly appeared but we were told they would be taken out of the mortgage. We got our building contract signed after some manically stressful weeks on 23rd Dec, builder knew we were dependent on FHOG for deposit but we still immediately got an invoice for $22k. As far as we were concerned the build wouldn't start until we paid that so we'd be waiting 3 months for the FHOG to come through, and then it emerged we couldn't apply from stamp duty refund until FHOG was approved (thanks again 123Homeloans for crap advice) but anyway we thought we'd have 3-4 months before the build started and a further 6 weeks according to the schedule before the slab was down. Enough time with a struggle to get $6k together.

 

The next thing that happened was in finalising the mortgage was we found out we could not use the FHOG as the deposit cos it ain't paid until the slab is down (& therefore we couldn't claim the stamp duty until then). 123Homeloans don't you just love their ineptitude! I phoned the builder from Westpac virtually in tears and they were okay about it and said they would get the slab down 'on faith' but this has caused another problem because instead of waiting for the deposit to be paid giving us 3 months grace everything has been done in 4 weeks!

 

We got notification this week of FHOG so I calls the bank to see how we get it so we can pay the builder & it turns out we don't. We have to pay the rest of the deposit first AND the mortgage fees ($7k remember) before the FHOG gets paid to the builder. And worse is to come because there has been some variations since the contract (including $2500 to demolish a shed, which is a story in itself) and I suspect they will have to be paid out in hard cash too before any mortgage money is released. We're already up to the limit on our credit card and basically we're screwed!

 

So the short answer is yes we knew about the progress payments but it's all happened a bit quicker and a bit differently than we were advised.

 

As for OH he knows he should be able to clock in, grin and bear it and clock out take the money and run. As you know my dad worked in the works (now closed down, my mam sent me the local paper and I cried) and his dad was a roofer and we talk about how they didn't see work as a source of pleasure but it's that difference between knowing and feeling again. Only he can work that one out, he's thinking of going back to college to retrain but of course finacially that would be a disaster right now! He's worried it's yet another hare brained scheme like moving to Oz was!

 

Thanks for the therapy!

 

Jules