Ping Pong Oh Dear

[MARYROSE02]

Thanks for the advice, seems like you have wrestled with similar issues in the past?

 

We came back as we had that nagging feeling we should, perhaps guilt is a large part of it, we also love the UK and Europe.

 

I like the two rights approach as I think you are correct, choosing between one developed country and another is not a hardship it's a privilege.

 

If Scotland goes Indy I see very little difference to my circumstances so it doesn't really come into my thinking in this instance.

 

I think our practical timeline to decide would place us returning to Oz around Oct-Dec 2015.

 

Cheers

 

Once I started going back to England for holidays, I couldn't stop, though I did not plan on any of them becoming more permanent. It was just circumstances, being made redundant after fifteen years, using the opportunity for a longer holiday than usual, then getting a temprary job which I liked. My Mum had an accident, then I wanted to stay with my Dad. My part time, temporary job, became full time and permanent (with Royal Mail.)

 

I always planned to come back to Sydney, though I could have stayed in England forever. Come to think of it, that word 'forever' is the one that is the, 'deal-breaker?' I can't think of the right word or phrase. 'Crossing the Styx?' 'Making that lifetime commitment?'

 

I see people engaged in one of those perennially pointless arguments about which country is better, and, although I enjoy arguing about it as much as anyone, at the same time, I do 'LIVE' in Australia. It's my home, and I'm not going back to England! But, I've still got my home in England because I could not push myself to sell up comepletely!

 

Come back at the end of 2015, and I guess it's still time to put your kids back in the Aussie education system? Another year in the UK, sorry!, 'Scotland', and you will probably know where you want to be. A part of that 'Ping-Pong Pom' mindset, is noticing one or other of the countries, imperceptibly 'growing' on you. I always remember reading about a couple who went to New Zealand, hated it, and spent the next couple of years saving and planning their return to the UK. But by the time they were ready to go back, they changed their mind because they realized that Auckland (I think) had 'captured' them.

[nikki244]

My opinion is this - if there's any way you can work remotely for your employer, I'd pull the kids out of school and homeschool them, and go travelling. That's what we are doing. For me, life's an adventure, and too short to worry about settling somewhere 'forever'. I know it's not a lifestyle that would suit everyone, but for those who have that itch for adventure, it is a dream that's achievable.

[Madasacutsnake]

My opinion is this - if there's any way you can work remotely for your employer, I'd pull the kids out of school and homeschool them, and go travelling. That's what we are doing. For me, life's an adventure, and too short to worry about settling somewhere 'forever'. I know it's not a lifestyle that would suit everyone, but for those who have that itch for adventure, it is a dream that's achievable.

 

Sounds like great fun.

 

We have moved our kids around Oz a fair bit so we would look to settle them back into day to day schooling again in their previous school.

 

Enjoy the adventure!

[Madasacutsnake]

OK so an update on how we are feeling about the whole thing.

 

We have child number 4 on the way now to add some extra drama to proceedings!

 

Myself and my wife have talked about this some more and I think we are realising that we had to come home to understand that Australia is home and where we want to be. If we didn't have the kids to consider then I'd just slowly begin preparing and head over to look for work via some old contacts and get on with it. That said we have 3 lovely kids at present and their happiness is very important to us both, we have broached the subject and with our eldest, he is eleven and he seems fairly meh about the idea but not horrified either. The kids have settled into Scotland as we are in an amazing village with great people around us so no complaints there. If we return the kids would be placed back into their old school at the bottom of the road so that should soften the impact of the upheaval as they still have friends their that currently speak to via PS3 games etc.

 

The work situation in WA is somewhat slower however I'm still in contact with an old boss that seems keen to get me onboard at his new employer should I return to WA. I understand rates etc. have been driven down a little since we returned but are still decent enough but the boom is well truly over!

 

We have a tenant in our house until mid October and then the house would be ours again, from a practical perspective we would have to furnish the house fully top to bottom and purchase new cars.........so not a cheap return by any means. However none of these things seem to faze us in anyway perhaps because the reality is we would need to take most of these steps in the UK in due course as we currently rent a furnished house here.

 

It's a difficult period as the family are happy to see us and we catch up a couple of times a month with my family and perhaps once a month with my wives side. Makes you think that the reality is with the amount of visits we've had from them and vice versa in our time down under compared with our total days together back home in a year things begin to look pretty much and like for like. I'm happy with the amount we see family it's enough without being overbearing.

 

Welcome any insights or advice as this very much raw feelings being shared and the final decision may well be that we settle down in Scotland long term.

[mygirlies]

I really don't think it should be about money, investment, property ladder etc. People are so caught up in all this!

You have two houses... thats more than most will ever be able to have. Rent in the UK till you are able to sell. Then buy. Simple.

 

To me this isn't a dilemma... I will never be able to purchase a home. In either country. And still I don't see that as a dilemma.

Be thankful for what you have. Don't be worrying about consuming more. Do what's important.

 

BE WHERE YOU ARE FAMILY IS HAPPY.

[Madasacutsnake]

I really don't think it should be about money, investment, property ladder etc. People are so caught up in all this!

You have two houses... thats more than most will ever be able to have. Rent in the UK till you are able to sell. Then buy. Simple.

 

To me this isn't a dilemma... I will never be able to purchase a home. In either country. And still I don't see that as a dilemma.

Be thankful for what you have. Don't be worrying about consuming more. Do what's important.

 

BE WHERE YOU ARE FAMILY IS HAPPY.

 

I agree the house/money situation is far from the be all and end all. In terms of disposable income there is a fair chance life in the UK will actually be kinder to us on that front. So in short despite some concerns over ensuring the finances are secure for our family, it is only a small part of a big picture.

 

I also agree we are extremely lucky to be on the property ladder, it seems to be an aspiration that is being taken out the hands of many in the UK because of crazy prices and really low wages. Australia also faces it's own challenges in that respect although wages in general seem to be a little better.

 

Where I've arrived at now, is that money aside the Aussie dream seems to be the life I'd rather live in the long term however I'm not sure it's fair on my two oldest children........that's the dilemma.

 

Trying not to make snap decisions

[janlo]

I agree the house/money situation is far from the be all and end all. In terms of disposable income there is a fair chance life in the UK will actually be kinder to us on that front. So in short despite some concerns over ensuring the finances are secure for our family, it is only a small part of a big picture.

 

I also agree we are extremely lucky to be on the property ladder, it seems to be an aspiration that is being taken out the hands of many in the UK because of crazy prices and really low wages. Australia also faces it's own challenges in that respect although wages in general seem to be a little better.

 

Where I've arrived at now, is that money aside the Aussie dream seems to be the life I'd rather live in the long term however I'm not sure it's fair on my two oldest children........that's the dilemma.

 

Trying not to make snap decisions

 

I think the UK gives a better chance of getting on the property ladder ALONG with a local employment. Those 2 factors are (apart from the obvious health thing) the most important thing dont you think ? Too many here in oz travel too far to work and are exhausted with no time for the family hence why the Friday thing is so big here....everyone seems to live for Friday ! I think work/life balance in the uk is....well...more balanced.

[Guest Ptp113]

I think the UK gives a better chance of getting on the property ladder ALONG with a local employment. Those 2 factors are (apart from the obvious health thing) the most important thing dont you think ? Too many here in oz travel too far to work and are exhausted with no time for the family hence why the Friday thing is so big here....everyone seems to live for Friday ! I think work/life balance in the uk is....well...more balanced.

 

Most people I know travel very short times. Maybe Central Coast into Sydney has skewed your perception?

[Johnny Kash]

OP, can I ask where you ended up moving back to in the Shire? Far from the City or fairly remote? Its coming up to the depths of winter now in UK, how are you finding the cold weather and dark nights, or are things like that not really an issue?

 

We had a trip to WA last weekend and enjoyed it, hella expensive though. We were paying $14 for beers at the waterfront in Perth, for a tightwad like me that was hard to take :biglaugh:

[janlo]

Well yes perhaps in Canberra the travel to work is less, still the youngsters cant afford properties near to the city I bet. Apart from London that is still achievable for the late 20/30 somethings back there who are in decent jobs.

[Madasacutsnake]

I think the UK gives a better chance of getting on the property ladder ALONG with a local employment. Those 2 factors are (apart from the obvious health thing) the most important thing dont you think ? Too many here in oz travel too far to work and are exhausted with no time for the family hence why the Friday thing is so big here....everyone seems to live for Friday ! I think work/life balance in the uk is....well...more balanced.

 

In terms of the property ladder it depends where in the UK you are as prices vary a great deal.

 

Worklife balance? I think it's been pretty similar in my field, commuting can also vary.

 

Health.......much and such surely down to the individual

[Madasacutsnake]

OP, can I ask where you ended up moving back to in the Shire? Far from the City or fairly remote? Its coming up to the depths of winter now in UK, how are you finding the cold weather and dark nights, or are things like that not really an issue?

 

We had a trip to WA last weekend and enjoyed it, hella expensive though. We were paying $14 for beers at the waterfront in Perth, for a tightwad like me that was hard to take :biglaugh:

 

Hello again Jonny Kash.

 

We are based close to Banchory......pretty much the sweet spot in my view, stunning place no complaints. The weather has been OK not too bad, but those dark mornings and late afternoons take a bit of getting used to again. My wife and I spend a fair bit of time in the central belt of Scotland and have both commented if we were to have settled there on our return then we'd already be back in Oz!

 

the area of country that we live in is stunning no two ways about it, job opportunities are great and the standard of living would arguably be the highest in the UK. That said I prefer living Australia.........so it's a case of, it's not you it's me!

 

Like I've said before we are very lucky to be able to wrestle with this problem.

[Marisawright]

I think the UK gives a better chance of getting on the property ladder ALONG with a local employment. Those 2 factors are (apart from the obvious health thing) the most important thing dont you think ? Too many here in oz travel too far to work and are exhausted with no time for the family hence why the Friday thing is so big here....everyone seems to live for Friday ! I think work/life balance in the uk is....well...more balanced.

 

Don't judge the whole of Australia by Sydney! Melbourne also has long commutes, but the other cities definitely don't.

[starlight7]

I guess ultimately it is where you feel most 'at home' and happy and what your children would like the best. Have you other family who are close to you or not? Why the West? Is it because of the job situation or just a preference you have? The isolation can be a problem for some ( I know people dispute this but it is isolated from almost everywhere)

[Madasacutsnake]

I guess ultimately it is where you feel most 'at home' and happy and what your children would like the best. Have you other family who are close to you or not? Why the West? Is it because of the job situation or just a preference you have? The isolation can be a problem for some ( I know people dispute this but it is isolated from almost everywhere)

 

Yup well said, I think I'm more at home down under as is my wife however we are worried about our two eldest kids, aged 9 & 11 as they have moved a few times when we were in Oz then back to the UK, this would have to be our final move.

 

The reason for the West is basically the job opportunities are more plentiful in my field and overall my wife prefers WA as do the kids, this is based on living in Victoria previously........me I preferred Victoria however I still like WA and you have to earn a living. Isolation is not something that really bothered us too much, we even lived in Karratha for 2 years!

[Marisawright]

Well yes perhaps in Canberra the travel to work is less, still the youngsters cant afford properties near to the city I bet. Apart from London that is still achievable for the late 20/30 somethings back there who are in decent jobs.

 

The commute from the outer edges of Canberra to the city centre is less than half an hour.

[Madasacutsnake]

The commute from the outer edges of Canberra to the city centre is less than half an hour.

 

I've just thought about the four different commutes that I had in Oz and as you can see below they were fairly standard and in line with the UK.

 

Torquay - Geelong 1/2 hour

Karratha Town - Woodside Burrup 20 mins

Baldivis - Bibra Lake 30 mins

Perth - Karratha 2 hours (FIFO) one return journey a month

 

My current commute in the UK is anywhere from 45-55 mins.

 

Are commutes in Australia confirmed as longer anywhere officially?

[Marisawright]

 

Are commutes in Australia confirmed as longer anywhere officially?

 

 

I very much doubt it. The person who claimed commutes were long was living on the Central Coast. Most Sydneysiders would think she was mad to live there - Aussies aren't as obsessed with being near the beach, so they'd be more likely to go to the closer Western or Southern suburbs for cheaper housing, rather than go all the way up the coast.

[Madasacutsnake]

OK so Still wrestling with this dilemma.

 

Seems like the shine may have worn off for my two elder boys now that they are not outside playing football every day after school, due to incessant rain fall. Discussion within the family unit is increasingly turning to Australia and our old life there, a slow realisation that perhaps we are in the wrong country. Trying not to snatch at the long term decision as it's too important for that however gut feel is to head back to WA.

 

Guilt about taking the kids away from grandparents being the only real UK pull factor it would seem.

 

Do any other Ping Pongers have any words of wisdom or feel like sharing there tales?

[MARYROSE02]

I made frequent trips back and forth to the UK during my initial eighteen years here, culminating in staying in the UK for twelve years after I was made redundant in Sydney in 1996. My parents also made frequent trips to Australia, including buying a home at one point and staying for two years. I've often felt guilty for breaking the family up, leaving my parents and grandmother at home - my brothers followed me out here one by one.

 

I always look at my diary for 1978 around this time of the year, as I left at the end of October, spent November in Perth, and a week in Adelaide, before arriving in Sydney on 8th December, so it's my anniversary in a few days. I find it hard sometimes, looking at that last week in October, doing the same stuff for three days, work, home, then my life changed forever! (Does that sound dramatic?)

 

My parents were still alive when I lost my job in Sydney otherwise I doubt if I would have gone to the UK. It was only supposed to be a long holiday, but one thing led to another, and I stayed, got a good job with Royal Mail, settled in, and even after my parents passed away, I stayed on for a couple of years.

 

Perhaps I should have stayed for another six years to take me to sixty and a better pension from RM, but on the other hand, I've created a new life, for a third time, back in Sydney. That's the thing I found out (the hard way!) about 'living' in a new country, or even an old one, going on holiday is one thing, but 'living' (and working) there is like emigrating all over again. I've done it three times now, and I don't think I want to do it again.

 

As far as commuting goes in Sydney, some people are lucky, but it is spread out over such a vast distance, plus the 'dormitory' areas (if you can call them that) on The Central Coast, Illawarra & Wollongong, and The Blue Mts, that many people spend an hour, two hours, maybe more, by the time you add on getting from home to station, station to work, commuting each day.

 

The Blue Mts train from Central to Penrith takes about 48 minutes, and it's an excellent service, but I had to allow ten minutes to walk to Central, and five from Penrith to work. I worked with people who lived in The Blue Mts, and they spent the same time as me coming from the other direction. Katoomba to Central - two hours, plus more travelling time/bus/train from Central. The roads are mostly awful - I'd sometimes wake at 5am and listen to traffic reports of roads already at a standstill. And they are just as bad at weekends! I don't suppose it is any less onerous, commuting from Southampton to London?

[Madasacutsnake]

OK so the dilemma has charged on and caused several sleepless night into the bargain.

 

Being based in the Aberdeen area there has been much made of the downturn in the Oil industry of late and many friends and colleagues have lost their jobs or contracts of late, some have picked up new positions at lower rates etc. I seem to be in a fairly safe position for now however predicting the where the oil price will settle is folly at this stage and I'm not complacent in any shape or form.

 

From discussions with my contacts in WA that are mostly employed in the LNG side of the industry the cutbacks are also biting there but the operation of these huge new assets will go ahead. I'm fairly confident I'd get something in Perth or the Pilbara but would welcome any insight into what is going on the ground regarding the oil & gas industry at the moment.

 

It looks as though we will head back around October with mixed feelings but sure the future for us as a family is likely to be better on most fronts in WA.

 

This Ping Pong game is hard work.

[CaptainR]

Oil and gas is definitely quieter here this year, but I am also lead to believe its busier then the North Sea with less cutbacks. Hope your not plan to live Karratha again, I've no idea how anyone lives here!

[Madasacutsnake]

I'd not rule Karratha out, we actually quite enjoyed it, although I do prefer Perth.

 

I take it you are employed in Oil & Gas supply stuff on the NW shelf?

[CaptainR]

I'd not rule Karratha out, we actually quite enjoyed it, although I do prefer Perth.

 

I take it you are employed in Oil & Gas supply stuff on the NW shelf?

 

 

Yes, work on offshore & subsea support vessels. I spend very little time Karratha, passing through every 5 weeks, and haven't found very much appealing about it, but I guess that's different to living there.